MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 14 December 2012

No Frills Excursions


Morning high (8.45am): 13C
Forecast high: 18C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): Southwest 4 to 5 reaching 6 during the morning and tonight occasionally 7.

A fine, sunny morning with a touch of mist. Should remain sunny and be breezy and a touch warmer than of late. Tomorrow should be a bit warmer still.

Evening update (18.00): Cloud came in this morning, but there was still a good deal of sun. A high of 17.2C, and getting distinctly blowy this afternoon.

Why Mallorca?: Business development

Why Tenerife? Without any explanation as to this question, an interpretation of it might be "what's the point of Tenerife?" On its own, it does sound odd, but the world (some of it) is going to get used to the question being posed. "Why Tenerife" is a slogan and it is intended to draw attention to what Tenerife has to offer for foreign investors, to its location as a hub for three continents (Europe, Africa and America) and to further develop international air and sea routes.

This initiative brings together various organisations on the island, such as the Tenerife Council and the Chamber of Commerce, who will share resources in advancing what they hope will be a new model of economic promotion for Tenerife. Key to the whole thing is a recognition that, or so says the vice-president of the Santa Cruz chamber, the only opportunity in current difficult economic times is to "look outside and to be attractive to businesses which might locate themselves (in Tenerife)".

Such an outward-looking attitude doesn't necessarily come easy to those with an insular mentality. Islands breed certain attitudes, and suspicion of outsiders, of whatever type, tends to be one. The presence of such an attitude might be denied by Mallorcans, but it prevails in Mallorca nevertheless, as no doubt it does in Tenerife, or has done.

There are similarities between Tenerife and Mallorca, other than attitudinal ones. The two islands' populations are virtually identical, Tenerife having fractionally more people than Mallorca, even if Tenerife is significantly smaller than Mallorca (roughly half the size). There is a similar reliance on tourism, but surprisingly perhaps, given that Tenerife is known for its greater level of all-year tourism, the annual volume of tourism is quite a bit lower than that in Mallorca (three to four million tourists lower).

Apart from tourism, Tenerife's economy has a similar mix to Mallorca's: agriculture, some industry, construction (not that there is much of this at present) and ambitions for further developments in the world of information and communications technology. One advantage that Tenerife enjoys over Mallorca is its status as a special tax zone, which means a considerably lower rate of corporation tax. This status is a recognition of a natural disadvantage, being stuck out in the Atlantic; Mallorca may suffer from being isolated but not as much as Tenerife does.

But this isolation, tax advantage or no tax advantage, is just one reason why attempts at attracting foreign investment might be difficult. And for Tenerife, read also Mallorca. If there were to be a similar campaign for Mallorca - a Why Mallorca? campaign - what would be the benefits? Any?

Economic diversification for Mallorca is essential, but there are several obstacles to inward investment or to that which might mean more than just small amounts of employment opportunities. One of them is the standard of education (in the public education sector at any rate), a problem shared with Tenerife. This might not matter if investment requires primarily manual skills, but information technology, if this is to be the key to diversification (and Mallorcan politicians keep insisting that it is), tends to demand rather more than the local education service can offer; the Balearics and the Canaries both underperform badly.

Other problems are ones that are all too familiar: political capriciousness, the result of government changes, trade-offs between coalitions and a general absence of any form of consensus across the political spectrum; political favouritism and suspicions or examples of corruption; environmental challenges and legal decisions that can take even businesses with the best due diligence by surprise.

A further problem, at least at present, is a structural one in government. It is one that is being highlighted by the planned introduction of the environmental tax for large retailers and the car-rental sector. The minister overseeing this tax, the vice-president, José Aguiló, is also meant to be the minister for business and employment. How on earth he reconciles these roles by going around looking to slap taxes on businesses I have no idea. It makes no sense to have one minister in charge of such potentially competing portfolios.

The fact that there is a minister with joint responsibility suggests that the government has not thought through what its commitment to business development might be. Indeed, does it actually have one? It would argue yes, but the evidence suggests no. This is a government interested in the short-term and the short-term alone. Its strategy for business is a shambles, which is a compliment in that it suggests that there might actually be one.

In Tenerife, they are at least trying. In Mallorca, they are not even doing that. Why Mallorca? Who knows.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Opposition parties denounce Bauzá to Balearics Supreme Court

The two main opposition parties in the Balearics, the PSIB (Balearics wing of PSOE) and the PSM, the Mallorcan socialists, have presented a "denuncia" to the islands' Supreme Court which alleges incompatibility between the business affairs of President Bauzá and his position as president. They further claim that Bauzá did not declare his interests. The opposition groups are seeking "transparency" rather than that the president be indicted. Bauzá, for his part, rejects that there is any incompatibility, the government's own officials having previously reported that there isn't any.

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 13 December 2012

No Frills Excursions


Morning high (8.45am): 13C
Forecast high: 17C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): South 3 to 4 reaching Southwest 4 to 5 by the evening.

Some light rain during the night, a damp morning but some brightness. Improving as the day progresses and warmer. Winds increasing tomorrow and over the weekend and temperatures climbing a touch.

Afternoon update (17.00): Getting breezier in the afternoon. Sunny periods during the day and a high of 17.9C.

Pleading Poverty: Business eco-tax

I know many a business owner who pleads poverty. And almost as many who are claim to be in penury yet then show off their latest five thousand euro Rolex or race past you in a new Beemer sports utility vehicle en route to one of their five remaining fincas. I take much of this boracic special pleading with a rather larger pinch of salt than that which many below the breadline in Mallorca can afford. Occasionally, just ever so occasionally, I can indulge in the deliciousness of schadenfreude. Did you hear the one about the owner of a car-rental firm who took delivery of a 300 grand Ferrari and promptly wrote it off when taking it out for its first spin?

Not all of this impecuniousness is feigned. Sometimes it is genuine. But there are certainly businesses which are still doing very nicely thank you, despite what their owners might prefer you to believe. And some of these businesses are in the car-rental sector: primarily those with sufficient purchasing power to create volume and to be able to compete on price (up to a point). There are others in the sector which are not so lucky, the smaller operations. It was once explained to me - at length - how margins are for such small concerns. To describe them as low doesn't quite do them justice.

The car-rental sector is rightly angry with the regional government's immovability over the tax on car hire, especially as the government appears willing to negotiate with owners of large retail centres over the imposition of taxes on them. The retailers argue that the so-called environmental tax on their properties will leave them not making a profit. I don't believe this for one moment, just as I don't believe that larger car-rental firms will go to the wall because of the hire-car tax, but I do have some sympathy. Not huge amounts but some.

The government is having a laugh. Does it seriously expect us to believe that it is interested in saving the planet? To dub these latest taxes as environmental is an insult to everyone's intelligence. The government has eyed up where it might be able to extract further pounds of flesh and dressed this flesh up with the propaganda of the "eco". It is sophistry of the highest, or is it the lowest, order. A government which can, certainly if you believe our good friends GOB, march all over virgin beaches or, through its chums at the Council of Mallorca, reverse a previous decision and permit the building of the Sencelles golf development has little credibility when it comes to environmental righteousness. Its justification for the new taxes is garbage. Just call them taxes and don't try and kid anyone.

These taxes are examples of the ways in which governments, both the regional one and the national one, can make things up as they go along or suddenly discover some decision or law from the past and decide to implement it, a classic case in point being the 1988 coasts law, application of good parts of which had been on the statute book for almost twenty years before zeal in the name of the environment finally reared its head (ironically, given that the coasts law is now being reformed). This making up of things, typified by the tax-raising opportunism the regional government has dreamt up, does business no service. I would dearly love to know what Media Markt, having finally been able to open in Palma and having been prepared to invest in the local economy, make of suddenly potentially being presented with a tax demand because, allegedly, customers availing themselves of its products are polluting the atmosphere in the immediate environs of the Ocimax centre.

Businesses need certainty, yet the government appears not to understand this. All it does appear to understand, where business is concerned, is that which comes replete with en-suite bedrooms and lobbies with florally-adorned atriums. I still struggle to understand how a tax on retail centres does not also apply to larger hotel sites. Well, I do understand. The hotels would have a screaming fit, while their guests don't pollute the atmosphere as customers do by arriving by the car load at a hypermarket (no, but they do so in different ways).

The trouble is, though, that just as the government is making things up by arguing the green case for taxes, so some businesses play a propaganda game themselves. If they didn't play the poverty hand, there might be more and genuine sympathy for them. They should understand that there are increasing numbers of people in Mallorca who know what poverty means. New Rolex, anyone?


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Real Mallorca 0 : 5 Sevilla (Copa del Rey)

The scoreline says it all. The cup may not be a Mallorca priority, but any sort of performance has to be. The game was all over after 25 minutes, Sevilla going three up. Mallorca had the chance to peg one back before the break, but Dos Santos's penalty was saved. A fourth for Sevilla almost immediately after the re-start, and that really was it, except for the fifth soon before the end. The return leg will be academic, not to say pointless, this is a team in total disarray.

Mallorca:
Aouate; Nsue, Conceiçao, Geromel (Bigas 45), Kevin; Martí, Fontás; Fernández (Cristeto 45), Dos Santos, Alfaro (Brandon 80); Arizmendi
Yellow: Kevin (58)

Sevilla:
Palop; Coke, Botía, Fazio, Navarro; Medel, Kondobgia (Hervás 66); Navas, Rakitic (Luna 52), del Moral; Negredo (Reyes 45)
Goals: Negredo (13, 17), Medel (25), Botía (47), Luna (84)
Yellows: del Moral (22), Fazio (45)

MALLORCA TODAY - Pollensa threatens not to pay Costas Authority

Pollensa town hall's spat with the Costas Authority gets worse, the town hall now threatening to withhold the tax of 220,000 euros it pays annually to the government because of a failure by the Costas to adequately maintain parts of the beach and coastal areas, notably Puerto Pollensa's pine walk, and because of an absence of any significant investment since the Ternelles beach was created in 1992. The mayor has also asked that the Costas set aside parts of the beaches to allow sandcastle building (this in response to the fine handed out to the sandcastle builder on Albercutx beach).

See more: Diario de Mallorca

MALLORCA TODAY - Car-rental firms angered by government inflexibility

A meeting between representatives of the Balearics car-rental sector and the vice-president for finance has ended with anger being expressed by the businesses at the lack of flexibility shown by the government in respect of taxes to be levied on car hire, this contrasting with some movement on similar "eco" taxes to be applied to large retail centres.

See more: Diario de Mallorca

MALLORCA TODAY - Hotasa hotels valued at 86 million euros

The seven hotels in the Hotasa chain that is part of the collapsed Nueva Rumasa group have been valued at 86 million euros, sufficient to pay off creditors owed by the various hotels. The highest price is wanted for the Beverly Playa in Peguera (34 million), while of the three Can Picafort hotels, the Clumba Mar is the highest priced at 9.9 million.

See more: Diario de Mallorca

MALLORCA TODAY - Alcúdia copper thieves arrested

Two men in their early twenties have been arrested while in the act of attempting to steal almost 250 kilos of copper from the old power station in Puerto Alcúdia.

See more: Diario de Mallorca

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 12 December 2012

 No Frills Excursions


Morning high (9.30am): 10C
Forecast high: 14C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): Northeast 4 easing to East 2 to 3 and by the later afternoon Southeast 3. Waves of two metres reducing to one metre.

Another morning mix of cloud and some sun. Likely to be sunnier during the day but still feeling cold. Warmer from tomorrow.

Evening update (18.00): Some sun during the day but light rain now, and temperatures down to 8 or 9 degrees, the day's high having been a mere 12.7C.

Estimates: Expats and voting

So, Sir Roger Gale's question to William Hague (raised with regard to the non-replacement of the British Consul in the Balearics) asking the British Foreign Secretary to estimate the permanent number of expatriate UK citizens and other UK homeowners in the Balearics drew a blank. I am not exactly surprised. I don't know if Sir Roger is a member of the Bow Group, but he could have ascertained from its website that the question was always likely to be met with silence. From an entry of 23 July, I quote: "British citizens are not required, or even prompted, to register with their local consulate upon taking up full or part-time residence abroad. The result of this is that it is not possible to obtain an accurate figure on how many British citizens live abroad, or how many live in any particular country".

Asking for an estimate was as good it could get, but what sort of estimate might have been forthcoming? The Foreign Office itself appears to believe the generally touted figure of 50,000 UK residents in the Balearics. Or at the least the British Embassy in Madrid believes the figure. It said so in its statement announcing Andrew Gwatkin's taking consular responsibility for the Balearics. I wonder where the Embassy gets its figures from.

There is a figure that one can work from, one that isn't an estimate. It is the official number of Brits who the Balearic Government says are registered, and this number is nothing like 50,000. It is under a half. Even taking account of those Brits who don't bother to register, this represents a sizable difference. And, always depending on which source you care to find or to quote, this 50,000 does not include part-time residents. There are thousands more of them. Apparently.

What I think we can safely assume to be accurate, and therefore the reason why the lackey in the Hague office felt unable to give a response to the Gale question, is that no one has the faintest idea what the number is. Except the regional government which gives a figure of some 23,000.

Getting a rather better grip on the numbers is of interest to the likes of the Bow Group. The quote above comes from an article on its website about expat voting rights, and the Bow Group, good Conservatives that they are, would fancy that the Conservative Party would be sure of scooping up the great majority of expat votes, if only these expats voted or were able to vote. (I don't know that the Bow Group should be so sure of this. Turkeyish and Christmassy it would be in terms of voting, but UKIP might well scoop the expat jackpot, but be this as it may.)

It isn't only the 15-year rule that has got the backs of the Bow Group up, it is also the fact that so few expats who are entitled to vote actually do vote. And it fingers the Foreign Office, in the form of "consulates", for being partly to blame. Mr. Gwatkin may care to note that "the system for voting from abroad is ... obtuse, unaided by our consulates". A parliamentary exchange earlier this year highlighted the exact number of expats anywhere who are registered to vote: Sir Peter Bottomley, "Will my Honourable Friend give those figures again? Did he say 23,000 out of four million?" My Honourable Friend had indeed said that.

Tempting though it is to take the coincidence of the 23,000 and assume that all of these expat voters are in the Balearics, this clearly would be wrong. But on the basis of the Balearic 23,000 and four million or so voting-age British expats across the globe (according to My Honourable Friend), then one could conclude that there is approximately half of one expat in the Balearics who is currently registered to vote.

Much though the system for voting may be obtuse and much though the consulates may not be helpful, there are other factors. Sheer apathy and lack of interest, for example. It may be the circles in which I move, but I can honestly say that voting in a British general election is not a subject high on the list of topics to discuss, unlike the Premier League or Strictly Come Dancing, which are.

Apathy isn't an excuse for the British Government to ignore expat voting rights. Denial of the right to vote under the 15-year rule goes against the principle of universal suffrage. Britain may not be the worst offenders as far as this denial is concerned - Denmark is far worse - but the suffrage principle is fundamental. The rule should, therefore, be scrapped, unless a change to Maastricht were to be made to enable voting in Spanish or other countries' general elections by non-nationals.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Balearic parliament speaker resigns because of corruption case

Pere Rotger (Partido Popular), the speaker of the Balearic parliament, has today resigned following the refusal of the judge, José Castro, to remove the indictment against him in respect of alleged corruption stemming from the so-called "caso Over" which has to do with the irregular financing of the PP during the 2003-2007 government of Jaume Matas.

MALLORCA TODAY - Pollensa's cock is stolen again

It has been a while, but the cock on the fountain in Pollensa ("la font de gall") has been nicked again. Mayor Cifre had been able to boast that it hadn't been lifted during his current stint. He now no longer can. The other story in the linked report is about Alcúdia's mayor having been in Paris to promote Alcúdia at the international nautical tourism fair.

See more: Diario de Mallorca

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 11 December 2012

 No Frills Excursions


Morning high (11.00am): 12C
Forecast high: 14C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): North 3 reaching Northeast 5 by the evening. Waves increasing to two metres from midday.

A later report, owing to an internet outage. Quite sunny but not particularly warm. Temperatures will be rising later in the week along with strengthening southerlies and westerlies.

Afternoon update (17.45): Spots of rain in parts, a bit heavier elsewhere, the sun gave way to cloud and variable temperatures, coastal highs only just over 12 degrees, but inland up to 14.8C. 

Crossing Over: Jazz in Spain

Depending on who you prefer to believe, jazz in Spain has either been in decline for twenty years or has never been so popular. The decline argument is one that forms the background to a current exhibition at Madrid's National Library dedicated to the history of jazz in Spain, and there are two main reasons for believing that there has been and still is a decline: one, an apparent loss of popularity in the early 1990s; two, a current-day problem with funding.

The argument doesn't really stand up, just as an argument which has it that jazz was repressed during the Franco era stands only so much scrutiny. The common belief is that jazz underwent a re-birth after Franco, having been popular prior to the Civil War. This belief requires the view that there was repression under Franco. There was during the earlier years, but so there was for mostly everything. The 1960s brought about significant change, and while Spanish pop music was generally rubbish and had to be happy, happy, touristy pap, jazz was treated with far greater respect. The first international jazz festival in Spain (Barcelona's) started in 1966, coinciding with a time when the world of jazz had edged into an era labelled "contemporary".

There were two fortuitous elements that helped to propel Spanish jazz into the general consciousness, but neither of them was Spanish as such. They were the titles of two recordings: Miles Davis's "Sketches of Spain" in 1960 and Chick Corea's simply entitled "Spain" in 1972. Purely by association and then also by imitation, jazz in Spain underwent a renaissance and Spanish jazz, or rather Spanish and Latin rhythms, were exported and crossed over into the contemporary world of jazz.

What is true is that jazz did enjoy a golden age of popularity in the later 1970s and 1980s, but the sudden explosion of jazz magazines, jazz programmes as well as more festivals (some of which still survive) has to be seen within the context of the cultural release and liberation that occurred in the years immediately after Franco's death. Its popularity was always likely to be difficult to sustain, however, just as it was elsewhere. The emergence of all manner of popular musical genres plus a probably inevitable burst of a bubble, formed in the 1970s by Corea, Herbie Hancock, Weather Report and others and which had helped to shoot jazz to unprecedented levels of worldwide interest, led to a waning in popularity.

What really happened in the 1990s, though, was evidence of the cyclical nature of music and of genres to re-invent themselves and to emerge in different forms. Jazz, partly because it is essentially freer in its form than other styles of music, is able to transform itself. It may not be "jazz", whatever the term really means, but in its ability to cross over and merge with other musical genres, it retains a jazz essence. Purists may not always appreciate this corruption, but fusion has helped to keep jazz popular, and in today's Spain its popularity remains undiminished. The loss of funding, as has been the case in Mallorca for both the Jazz Voyeur and Sa Pobla festivals, doesn't indicate a lack of popularity; it indicates unfortunate realities of economic life and of economies' inabilities to adequately support the arts and culture.

Crossover into flamenco, associated most obviously with Paco de Lucia, gave jazz a specifically Spanish flavour, though flamenco crossover had been attempted earlier, the American vibes player Lionel Hampton having introduced castanets, not exactly successfully, in the late 1950s. The more recent crossover and the subsequent further amalgamation of chill into the flamenco-jazz mix have created a hybrid of Ibizan club music and the tradition of Andalucía, the sound of which is de rigueur for any establishment claiming to offer "chill".

While flamenco has helped to breathe different life into Spanish jazz, other local musical traditions have also crossed over. Catalonian folk music is one such. But for all that jazz is popular in Mallorca, the same crossover hasn't really occurred here. An artist who has given it a go is Onofre Garcías, who on his 2011 album "Migration" took some Mallorcan folk music traditions, collaborated with Mike Oldfield, and ended up sounding not unlike Mike Oldfield.

What hasn't happened, as far as I am aware, is a genuine crossover using Mallorcan folk instruments, the pipes, the flutes, even the weird ximbomba. Yet there is no reason why not. Brazilian crossover jazz took off with the help of native instruments, so why not Mallorcan crossover? Despite the National Library's exhibition suggesting otherwise, jazz does retain its popularity, and a key reason why lies with how it has embraced other musical styles.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Iberia unions call off strikes

The various unions representing different groups of workers at Iberia have decided to call off the strikes planned for six days between 14 and 21 December; this, despite not having arrived at any agreement with the company. The unions say that they may call new strikes in the new year, however.

MALLORCA TODAY - Ferrari written off by Alcúdia car-rental owner

Now then, here's your starter for ten. Who do you suppose this story refers to? Owner of a car-rental firm in Alcúdia, buys a Ferrari for 300 grand, takes it out for a spin (with his brother), crashes it some two hours having taken delivery, seemingly because of excessive speed, and has the car taken to the firm's garage in Avenida Tucan?

See more: Diario de Mallorca

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 10 December 2012

No Frills Excursions


Morning high (8.30am): 7C
Forecast high: 16C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): West 4 veering Northeast 5 by the evening.

A crisp, sunny morning and staying sunny. Tomorrow is expected to be cloudy and the rest of the week a mix of cloud and sunny periods. Getting warmer by the end of the week, highs up to 18C, but also windy.

Evening update (18.30): Not a bad day, a high of 17.3C.

The National Navel-Gazing Pastime

Much as it is said that the main Spanish national pastime is tax evasion, this overlooks one that is altogether more abstract than forgetting to charge IVA or simply forgetting the small matter of several thousand euros that came to be stashed under the bed or occasionally buried in the garden. The Spanish are masters of the navel-gazing art. A natural exuberance, one attributed to the Spanish by patronising foreigners prone to only wish to observe a particular trait, conflicts with introspection and self-examination, but such exuberance, which manifests itself at fiesta time or on every occasion when Spain wins an international football tournament, is part of this analytical anal retentiveness. How can a country with such vibrancy and vitality be at the same time so dysfunctional and so insignificant?

In fact, the exuberance hides all manner of sins. An excuse to party or to go to the playa delays to the point of stasis real action to tackle realities. The decadence of fiesta and a further decadence of greed and looking after number one and number one alone have been centuries-old palliatives for coping with what first brought Spain into international disrepute and then into the long decline of irrelevance.

Once the world's most powerful and wealthiest nation, Spain's fall was predicated on vested interests and on a lack of interest in development. Unlike other colonial powers, it merely took rather than gave, it didn't seek to commercially engage with its new world or to truly establish institutions (other than religious ones), and so ultimately empire withered away. The rich were interested only in getting richer rather than contributing, and so it was with other sectors of society, the Church, for instance.

Such an explanation for Spain's decline is an old one. José Ortega y Gasset, one of Spain's greatest thinkers, was banging on about all this decades ago. Yet the narrative has remained largely unaltered, and Spanish navel-gazing is still fixed on how Spain managed to so spectacularly throw it all away from the late sixteenth century onwards and on how the same dynamics behind imperial failure keep repeating themselves.

For centuries, Spain has been at war with itself (metaphorically if not actually in battle), rarely enjoying settled, lengthy periods of stability. Most of the twentieth century was one such time of turmoil, and its legacy most definitely endures. A lack of continuity has been Spain's lot, and rather than a national amnesia post-Franco, the memories are strong, far too strong. Spain is a country constantly looking over its shoulder to the past, believing that the old discontinuities will return. The memory of Franco consumes virtually everything in today's Spain.

In truth, these discontinuities have never gone away; they have merely been, for the past thirty odd years, hidden under the beds along with the undeclared stashes of those who still look after number one and number one alone. And despite the arrival of democracy, or possibly because of it, the divisions are as they have long been. These are divisions which are regional and linguistic, divisions which set republic against monarchy, secularism against Catholicism, divisions between the general public and politicians who are viewed with suspicion and enormous distrust, divisions caused by endemic corruption and nepotism. And yet, these divisions are treated with a shrug of societal apathy and resignation and the resort to the decadence of fiesta as a means of reconciling them. This is how things are, but they are also how things were. Exactly the same was true of the early 1930s.

Spain's entrance into the international community, confirmed by European acceptance in the mid-80s, should have brought about fundamental change. Or so it would have been hoped. For a brief time, an old glory reminiscent of the years of the rivers of gold in the sixteenth century returned, but it has been an illusory glory. Spain stays at the periphery. It is of international significance only because it demands so much foreign attention for the wrong reasons and because it keeps winning at football. Its dysfunctionalism is inbred, the progeny of its past and of the birth of the more recent. The latest navel-gazing has turned its attention to the 1978 Constitution, itself a job lot of lofty idealism that was designed to create national unity and to establish checks and balances, objectives that have been only partially achieved.

The navel-gazing extends to the regions. In the Balearics, the people are asked whether they feel Spanish, Balearic, Mallorcan, sympathetic to the Catalan Lands. This constant inquisition serves simply to convey an impression of identity confusion, a consequence of the age-old discontinuities.

The Constitution may in fact be part of the problem in that it granted woolly regional autonomy. The arguments over regionalism and over separatism are the result of the Constitution's good intentions, but these intentions have only led to more introspection. Who are the Spanish (or not) and what do they really want (or not)?


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Levante 4 : 0 Real Mallorca

A midday kick-off in Valencia for Mallorca, badly in need of a good result against a solid Levante side. Despite a Levante disallowed goal after only a minute, all seemed to be going reasonably well for Mallorca, dominating possession but failing to make any real chances, until things went belly-up, Obafemi Martins scoring just before half time (Geromel at fault) and then Navarro, García and Iborra adding three within twelve minutes of the re-start, the fourth goal courtesy of a further defensive error. Given their possession, Mallorca should have done better. The result leaves Mallorca in 17th place, and they will stay there unless Deportivo (unlikely) beat Atletico Madrid away later today. Next up for Mallorca, at home against Bilbao who are not having a great season.

Levante:
Munúa; Lell, Ballesteros, David Navarro (Rodas 78), Juanfran; Michel (Pallardó 75), Iborra; El Zhar (Roger 70), Barkero, García; Martins
Goals: Martins (42), Navarro (48), García (54), Iborra (57)

Mallorca:
Aouate; Ximo Navarro (Arizmendi 45), Nunes, Geromel, Bigas; Pina (Martí 60), Márquez; Nsue, Victor (Alfaro 61), Dos Santos; Hemed
Yellow: Nunes (31)

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 9 December 2012

No Frills Excursions


Morning high (9.00am): 8C
Forecast high: 14C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): North 5 to 6 easing rapidly to 3 to 4 and backing Northwest and West during the morning. Rough conditions with waves to two metres improving.

Quite a grey and cold morning, the day doesn't look as though it will be as sunny as had been previously forecast. The outlook for the week is mostly cloudy with temperatures fluctuating between highs of 13 and 17.

Evening update (18.15): Turned out better and sunnier than the morning's forecast had suggested. A high of 16.5C.

MALLORCA TODAY - Alcúdia will expropriate graves

There are a number of tombs in Alcúdia's cemetery that have been left abandoned, so Alcúdia town hall plans to take them back into its possession, exhume the remains and deposit them in a mass grave, unless owners come forward and look after them.

See more: Diario de Mallorca

MALLORCA TODAY - Sa Pobla asks for more health personnel

Sa Pobla town hall has asked the regional government health ministry that personnel levels at its health centre be increased. The centre in Sa Pobla, which also serves Búger and Campanet, has caught up in a row over staffing which came to a head when a nurse refused to attend to an outside emergency and leave the centre understaffed.

See more: Diario de Mallorca

For What It's Wert: Education law

Education, education, education. In the five co-official languages of Spain, there are three translations of education. Educación, educació, hezkuntza. As ever, it is only the Basques who are in a total linguistic other world. Castellano and Galician are in agreement and so, in a slightly different way, are Catalan and Aranese.

The Galicians having the same word for education as the one in the language the rest of the world finds easier to refer to as Spanish is fortuitous. The Spanish Prime Minister, Mariano Rajoy, is Galician. The Galician people, those who bothered to vote recently anyway, favour Rajoy and his party. The Galicians are a conservative people. They can also number among their most famous sons one Francisco Franco.

José Ignacio Wert isn't Galician. He comes from Madrid, the centre of government and very firmly a centre of Castellano. Sr. Wert is the national minister for education (educación, educació, hezkuntza), culture and sport. He is currently attempting, and succeeding handsomely, in antagonising everyone who has an interest in education, culture and sport, save for those who are educated in Castellano (or Galician), have a culture which is "high" Spanish (which excludes the Catalans most obviously) and who follow football teams rooted near to the seat of national government. Well, follow a football team.

So aware of education and culture is Sr. Wert that he wishes to establish a Spanish mono-culture. And Spanish it most definitely would be. His reform of education envisages far greater amounts of teaching being undertaken in Spanish and not in co-offical languages such as Catalan. Among the various opponents of Wert's Law are FC Barcelona, the Catalonian footballing anti-Christ forever in conflict with the regal, the very Spanish Real Madrid, Rajoy's football team, as it was also Franco's. Barça, more than a club, is living up to its motto. It is fully in favour of Catalan "immersion" in Catalonia's schools and so dead against Wert. (I wonder how good Messi's Catalan is.)

A couple of months ago, Sr. Wert signalled the direction in which he was heading when he announced that it was his government's intention to "castellanize" Catalan students so that they would feel greater national pride. He didn't actually say that he didn't want the students to not feel pride in being Catalan as well, but this of course was how it was interpreted. It was an easy mistake to make because anti-Wert forces had been alerted to an earlier example of Wertism. This was his decision to revive a grant (of almost 200,000 euros) for the Spanish biographical dictionary. It had been withdrawn by the previous government until certain "errors" were corrected, which still haven't been. Specifically, these are that Franco isn't referred to as a dictator and that a large part of the repression under Franco is overlooked.

As always, the spectre of Franco looms whenever Catalan appears threatened. The secretary-general of the CiU in Catalonia, Josep Duran Lleida, has called for Wert's resignation and has described his law as "the worst attack" on Catalan since Franco's death. The CiU may have lost ground after the recent election, but there are more fanatically separatist elements which have gained ground in Catalonia that will take great delight in using Wert's Law as a means to their end of independence.

You do have to wonder why the national government is so intent in pushing Castellano to the detriment of other languages. It knows it will have a fight and it seems happy to pick one. So much, therefore, for trying to create a spirit of unity in the country as a whole in order to tackle rather more pressing matters.

But it could have been predicted that the fight would come, as one only had to look at the Balearics, the test-bed, the experiment for some of what the PP nationally had in mind. However, the desire to push Castellano in the Balearics has been a flop. For the Balearics education minister, Rafael Bosch, who has overseen the failure to achieve a greater degree of teaching in Castellano, Wert's Law is a Godsend. He can blame it when its imposition falters. Or he can use it to reinforce the Balearic Government's own stance on Catalan, though he is prone to coming out with seemingly contrary statements, his latest being that he will "work to the last moment so that Catalan is an official language".

While Bosch is working to the last moment, Sr. Wert will be busy in a different way. Faced with criticism of his law, he has said that he is "a fighting bull that grows stronger when provoked." He really should choose his descriptions more carefully. The Catalonians have banned bullfighting.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 8 December 2012

No Frills Excursions


Morning high (8.30am): 11C
Forecast high: 16C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): North 4 to 5 easing temporarily during the morning to variable 2 to 4 and increasing 5 to 6 by the evening.

In contrast to the night before, mild overnight, 15 degrees or so around midnight. Some rain in the early hours and so damp and mild this morning. Expected to be sunny later and windy.

Afternoon update (17.30): A good deal of sun and a high of 15.7C.

Comfortably Numb: Not knowing Mallorca

What do any of us know about Mallorca? There are visitors who come to the island for just a few days who know more. They know more because they come with their curiosity aroused. They are more often than not German and not British, as the British are an appallingly incurious people.

The any of us that I refer to are those of us who live in Mallorca, those of us who take pride in the paradise nature of the island, those of us who bask in the reflection of this paradise, those of us who might even boast of it or use it as a justification for presence on the island, despite the dreadful hardships that have befallen Mallorca, despite the inconveniences, the discriminations, the feigned "friendships" with local people that too many expatriates are prone to believe exist.

Outside of the small communities - and they are small, unless they are in Palma or perhaps the conurbation that surrounds Palma - there is the great unknown. It is an unknown of negligent immobility and of the smugly familiar which insists that, within these small communities, there are paradise vistas, paradise restaurants and paradise beaches, but which is only aware of what resides elsewhere because of received wisdom. It is an unknown of the comfortably numb, comfortably coffined into the padded satin lining of death by the cuts of thousands of experiences, views, landscapes, seascapes that exist outside of this numb familiarity - all missed, mortality-encroaching realities. It is an unknown that is boxed in, that is unwilling to ever escape, to explore, to become aware through own eyes of what is otherwise made visual through the internet or the media. It is an unknown that knows but does not feel. It is an unknown of many in Mallorca who have never known Mallorca and who still don't know Mallorca.

There again, why should you ever know Mallorca? It is the fate of residence that inaction takes over, that repetition dominates, that the familiar and the easy dominate. Not just Mallorca. It is the same anywhere. Because it's there, it ceases to be important. It is just there, and there is reassurance in it being there, whatever it is, be it mountain, town or coastline.

Mallorca is not big. It is small but it is nevertheless vast in its possibilities. Its smallness is such that it should be known, but it isn't. Real knowledge is confined to the few. The rest who profess knowledge have none, because all they know is their own bailiwick, their own tiny domain of paradise. Banyalbufar, Biniali, Búger, Caimari ... how many more should I quote, and how many more are unknown?

Get up, get out, just go. Anywhere. Take a look. There are amazing places that surround you. They are known to be there, but they are unknown. Don't let them be.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 7 December 2012

No Frills Excursions


Morning high (9.00am): 6C
Forecast high: 17C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): Southwest 3, increasing by midday to 5 and by the evening Northwest 5 to 6.

A distinctly chilly night, the temperature rising quite quickly on what will be a sunny day. The wind is set to get up again overnight and tomorrow there is an alert out once more for poor coastal conditions.

Evening update (19.45): A warm day in the direct sun, a high of 17.9C. Breezes picking up later in the day and staying at times fairly stiff over a sunny weekend. 

I'd Like To Thank ...

You know when the year is drawing to a close. It's the time when gongs are handed out and award-winners are obliged to make embarrassing speeches. Soon, in just over a week's time, we will probably be required to recognise that it was Mallorca what won it for Wiggo, or some such rot. If the Bradmeister wins Sports Personality, we'll never hear the end of it.

Rather lower down the list of awards ceremonies in terms of awareness among the local British community has been that of the Fomento del Turismo (otherwise known, if somewhat misleadingly nowadays and in English at any rate, as the Mallorca Tourist Board). It handed out its annual gongs on Monday evening. The Fomento was lucky enough to have been graced with the presence of the Balearics dear leader at its yearly thrash. President Bauzá went, he spoke and he told the audience that the annual promotional plan for tourism (there is one) will be unveiled on 17 December, the day after Wiggo's anticipated coronation by BBC licence-payers. Maybe we can also anticipate Wiggo being part of the annual plan.

Whatever the regional government has planned for its plan, we already know one thing. It will be doing more with less. Bauzá said so on Monday evening, thus reinforcing the message that has been forthcoming from tourism minister Delgado in those rare moments when he has been on-message and not on a hunting trip. Doing more with less does of course mean that there isn't any money. But I'm not about to criticise. I have said before that less money should exercise minds to be more creative.

The Fomento's president, Eduardo Gamero, spoke about tourism competitiveness being improved thanks to provisions within the new tourism law and also about what the Fomento does, highlighting in particular the work of the International Press Centre, which fully deserves having its work highlighted. The Fomento - and an organisation that is over a hundred years old really should be looked after rather better when in its dotage - is unfortunately strapped for cash and now reliant on its members for financial support. Whether the government has in fact paid the Fomento everything it owes it I couldn't say, but Sr. Gamero might well have reminded the dear leader were there any outstanding invoices buried under a pile of other demands on the desk of the governmental purchase ledger clerk.

Still, it does always help to keep in with those in high governmental places, and the Fomento went one step higher than regional government in doling out the 2012 awards. Recipient of the gold plaque was Turespaña, the national tourism promotion agency, and there to receive the award was none other than the national tourism secretary of state and the president of Turespaña, Mallorca's very own property expert, Isabel Borrego. Perhaps the plaque was handed over with a note asking Sra. Borrego to have a word with Bauzá about the invoices.

Turespaña joins an illustrious list of award winners over the past few years and a list of non-award winners, the most illustrious of these being our good friends GOB, the environmental pressure group. It was up for a gong in 2007, until someone suggested that GOB had not demonstrated that it actually supported tourism. But that was in 2007. We now know of course that GOB does support tourism. Eco tourism. Which means groups of no more than twenty ramblers at a time schlepping across the Tramuntana, conversing in Catalan and taking refuge in dry stone shelters which are self-sufficient in organic vegetables. The good news for the ramblers is that when they get lost or stuck, there is always the Guardia Civil Mountain Rescue Unit to come to their aid; it won a Fomento award in 2011.

Other previous winners have included motorcycle world champion Jorge Lorenzo (gold medal in 2010), an award which might suggest that Wiggo has a chance to add a Fomento medal to his trophy cabinet, the Yannick and Ben Jakober Foundation in Alcúdia (silver plaque in 2008) and the Vi Primitiu, the wine association based in Pollensa, which got a diploma in 2008.

And given that there has also been the odd hack who has received an award, without sounding slightly presumptuous, I would like to nominate myself for one next year. I'm not bothered about a plaque or a medal or even a diploma. I'll settle for the cash, so long as I know the invoice will get paid. With this in mind, I'd like to thank ... .


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 6 December 2012

No Frills Excursions


Morning high (9.00am): 13C
Forecast high: 15C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): Northwest 5 to 6, easing by midday to variable 3.

A bright start on what is a public holiday (Constitution Day). Some cloud around as well, and the mix of sun and cloud will persist during the day. Tomorrow and into the weekend should be sunnier.

Afternoon update (17.45): It turned out mostly sunny but not especially warm; the forecast high of 15C was spot-on.

MALLORCA TODAY - Sa Pobla loan was illegal

The Balearics Supreme Court has decided that a loan for three million euros that Sa Pobla town hall took in 2009 was illegal, the court agreeing with central government that it contravened rules introduced around that time for preventing town halls increasing their debts.

See more: Ultima Hora

MALLORCA TODAY - Supreme Court will hear Ternelles case in January

All the fuss about the Pollensa-Lluc walk, you might have forgotten the outstanding issue surrounding the walk along the Cami Ternelles, which wasn't decided to either the satisfaction of the owners or Pollensa town hall after lengthy hearings in front of a judge in Inca. The case will now be heard by the Balearics Supreme Court on 16 January, a date that is more than a touch symbolic given the association between Ternelles (and its pine) and the Sant Antoni fiesta in Pollensa.

See more: Ultima Hora

The Great Spanish Corporate Tax Dodge

Gerardo Díaz Ferrán is going to need to stump up 30 million euros bail in order to avoid going to jail. This massive requirement is far from untypical. Whether it is a realistic sum is not for me to say, but there is a touch of the theatre about the spectacular demand. Judges, prosecutors and headline writers all revel in the vastness of such demands, just as they do when inflated prison terms are requested.

The play involving Díaz Ferrán is about to begin. Corrupt politicians having exited stage left temporarily are to be replaced by a whole new set of actors - the corporate swindlers. Politicians have lined their pockets and incurred the wrath of a nation that believes, simplistically, that had they not, all Spain's woes would never have occurred. It would be handy to have some of the stolen swag back, but the theatrical production that is Spain's missing millions or billions is shifting its scenery. The corporate world is now facing the spotlight and the scrutiny of an audience wondering what the make-up actually hides.

Díaz Ferrán is accused of money laundering and concealing assets. Both are crimes. The plot is therefore transparent, as transparent as such crimes, the movement of cash and paper trails can in fact be. There is, though, a sub-plot, a less transparent one, and one that isn't illegal but creative. To give it the name that the Hacienda uses, it is "fiscal engineering". The payment of tax. Or not.

The furore in the UK surrounding Starbucks and its tax obligations is being echoed in Spain, and the echo is about to grow louder. The alleged criminality involving Marsans turns the focus onto big business and its failure to contribute to Spanish financial well-being. The publicity afforded to political corruption has tended to obscure the often far greater sums of money that have not been forthcoming from multinationals and Spanish companies.

Here is an interesting fact. In 2007, BC (before crisis), Spanish companies achieved record profits, there having been an overall increase of 15%. The government anticipated that its coffers would therefore swell at least to the same extent as they had thanks to taxes raised in 2006. Strangely enough, they didn't. In fact, they under-swelled; company tax revenue fell by 18%. The only plausible explanation was that tax evasion had increased. It continues to increase, and mostly all of this tax evasion centres on super rich private individuals and on large businesses and multinationals. 

Here is another interesting fact (well, estimate): 80% of Spanish companies are said to be hiding money in tax havens. And here is yet another interesting fact. Between them, seven of the world's largest businesses, all with Spanish divisions, have managed to pay only 25 million euros tax in the last three years, despite having registered billions of euros in revenues.

If you want to know which companies these are, I'll happily tell you, thanks to the revelation made by the "El País" journalist, Jesús Sérvulo González. Or rather, let me give you some clues first.

Are you buying books or other goods online and sending them as Christmas presents? What sort of a computer do you have (those with the two main operating systems)? Do you buy goods via an online auction? Do you spend all day communicating total drivel to your friends? Do you attempt to blow up the internet by typing a word you shouldn't into something you shouldn't (or into a different something)?

Yep, Amazon, Apple, Microsoft, eBay, Facebook, Google and Yahoo. 25 million euros over three years between the seven of them. And how do they manage to pay so little? Take Apple, for example. Most of its sales are billed not in Spain but in Ireland where corporation tax is almost a third of the rate in Spain. The tax bill for its retail wing in Spain last year was under 150,000 euros on a turnover of more than 75 million. Most of its costs were allocated to the Irish subsidiary.

Not all multinationals contribute as little. Surprisingly perhaps, given the lack of tax revenue that the UK gains from Vodafone, the mobile phone company's Spanish division handed over almost 900 million euros between 2008 and 2010. Like the other technology giants, there is nothing wrong with how Vodafone accounts for tax in different countries (though the Spanish tax man has taken a particular interest in both Google and Microsoft), but there is the moral issue, one that is that much greater when ordinary people in Spain are being hammered by tax rises.

There again, in the corporate world, there is morality and there is morality, a conundrum that Sr. Díaz Ferrán may care to reflect on.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Albufera fire forces evacuation

Occupants of a house off the Cami Polls between Muro and Sa Pobla had to be evacuated earlier today when a fire broke out in Albufera and affected some 40 hectares of reed land. The smoke was very thick for several hours, and the fire appeared to be in an identical spot to one last year.

See more: Ultima Hora

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 5 December 2012

 No Frills Excursions


Morning high (9.00am): 14C
Forecast high: 16C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): Northwest 6, 7 at times. Rough conditions with a yellow alert in place.

Sunny, partially cloudy and breezy, the winds should ease this evening. Staying sunny during the day, the outlook is for more wind later in the week and a slight fall in temperatures.

Afternoon update (17.45): Feeling chilly in the strong winds, a high of just 15C.

MALLORCA TODAY - Bauzá promises promotional plan that does more with less

President Bauzá said at the awards ceremony for the Fomento del Turismo that a plan to be unveiled on 17 December will be one that will adjust the cost of tourism promotion but which will be no less effective.

See more: Ultima Hora

MALLORCA TODAY - Discounts for Christmas shoppers in Pollensa

This weekend, shoppers in Pollensa will be able to take advantage of discounts up to 70%, the first of three weekend pre-Christmas shopping events in the town.

See more: Diario de Mallorca

Hidden Assets: The Marsans scandal

The surviving business partner who ran what was once Spain's largest company employer has been arrested. Gerardo Díaz Ferrán formerly headed up Grupo Marsans along with Gonzalo Pascual, who died six months ago, and was also formerly the president of the CEOE, the Spanish equivalent of the CBI. He was detained on Monday, accused of money laundering and non-declaration of assets.

Díaz Ferrán's arrest is the latest twist in the ongoing investigation of the bankrupted Marsans, and Díaz Ferrán is the latest Spanish über-businessman with a strong Mallorcan connection to be collared by the police. Of others, José María Ruiz-Mateos, owner of another failed company, Nueva Rumasa, is accused of diverting money raised by mortgaging hotels in the Hotasa chain, of which there are several in Mallorca. Nueva Rumasa, in its original incarnation before it was expropriated by the Spanish government in 1983 because of its massive debts, was Spain's biggest company, so in that previous incarnation it was as important a business as Marsans was prior to its collapse in 2010.

Díaz Ferrán and Ruiz-Mateos are both high-profile businesspeople, though arguably neither is as high profile as Iñaki Urdangarin, the King's son-in-law, if only because neither of them has royal connections. Urdangarin is the third party in what is a pretty unholy businessperson trinity, even if the money involved in the case against Urdangarin is small beer when compared with that which is involved with both Marsans and Nueva Rumasa.

One aspect of the case against Urdangarin that has been investigated is the alleged channelling of money offshore. Díaz Ferrán faces a similar investigation, and the timing of his arrest is probably no coincidence as it has followed swiftly on the period of the amnesty for declaring previously undeclared assets having ended.

The investigation of Díaz Ferrán has been prompted in part because of complaints lodged by the likes of the Meliá hotel group and the Orizonia travel company. These complaints extend beyond Díaz Ferrán and include Ángel de Cabo, who has also been arrested. De Cabo is significant in all this, and especially so for Mallorca. Not only has he acquired some Nueva Rumasa businesses, his investment vehicle, Posibilitum, acquired Marsans businesses, one of them being Hotetur, of which Alcúdia's huge Bellevue hotel complex is a part. The complainants refer to the "alleged sale" for 600 million euros of Marsans to Posibilitum just prior to Marsans being declared bankrupt; this purchase has alternatively been described as having been made with a "nominal sum".

De Cabo, according to the police, acted as a sort of front man for Díaz Ferrán, and received a significant sum for doing so. The thrust of charges is that assets were syphoned off and hidden to avoid demands against Marsans that exceeded 400 million euros.

To say that the whole affair is complicated would be an understatement, and it is one that highlights links and relationships at the grandest corporate level which impact on Mallorca and Spain's tourism industry. One such link is that between Marsans and Orizonia. The latter is owed money by Marsans. The guarantee against this money was Bellevue, and the future management of Bellevue has been (and still is, as far as I am aware) the subject of a separate judicial examination to decide the fate of Hotetur. A proposal to split the operation of Bellevue between Posibilitum's management company and Orizonia's Luabay hotel division appears to still be up in the air. It is likely to be even further up in the air now that De Cabo has been arrested, now that questions about Posibilitum's acquisition of Marsans are being asked and now that, to make matters even more complicated, the Barceló hotel group has offered to buy Orizonia, subject to agreement by the Spanish competition commission. The uncertainty that has surrounded Bellevue throughout its 40 years of existence just refuses to go away.

Coming on top of political corruption cases and of the dire economic situation, the cases against the unholy businessperson trinity are all damaging: Ruiz-Mateos, because he has long sailed close to the wind; Urdangarin, because of his connections; and now Díaz Ferrán. Of the three, his case may prove to be the most damaging for what remains of Spain's reputation. Former president of the Spanish business confederation, former owner of a massive company at the heart of the tourism industry; it doesn't get much worse.

Though the Díaz Ferrán case is not exclusively a Mallorcan issue, the affair does have strong Mallorcan links. Political corruption had come to be pretty much expected in Mallorca. Now there is business scandal as well, and you wonder how much more there might be to come.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 4 December 2012

 No Frills Excursions


Morning high (8.45am): 13C
Forecast high: 17C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): West 4 to 5 reaching Northwest 6 during the morning and 7 at times. Rough.

Largely cloudy and set to be very windy today and for the next few days. An alert out for coastal conditions as a consequence but probably just as appropriate for inland areas.

Evening update (18.00): Little by way of sun, but a high of 17.9C, feeling less warm because of the wind that has gusted over 60kph at times. 

Political Nature: GOB

In a recent article, I identified influential Mallorcans who were unlikely to be well-known to foreign residents. One of them was Margalida Ramis, spokesperson of GOB, the Balearics environmental pressure group. It was good, therefore, to read an interview with her in "The Bulletin" on Sunday.

The interview boiled down to four themes, two of them, the Sa Rapita development by Es Trenc beach and the import of waste for incineration at Son Reus, having been well-covered previously. The other two, the political environment (sic) and the nature of tourism, have also been well-covered but there were specific issues that cropped up with regard to these themes, and it is these I wish to address.

Sra. Ramis had a go at both the Partido Popular and the opposition. "Both sides of the house (the Balearic parliament) are totally inept." "The Balearics is not being governed and there is no proper opposition to hold the government to account." Neither of these statements brooks much argument, though when Sra. Ramis refers to the "opposition", does she mean all opposition parties or just PSOE? I wouldn't argue with her that PSOE is useless, but what of the PSM (the Mallorcan socialists) who form a pact with the Greens? Maybe she means them as well.

The point is worth raising because GOB, ostensibly a charitable organisation that devotes itself to a one-issue cause, has become a quasi-political organisation. The environment is a political issue, this much is undeniable, but GOB has gone well beyond this single issue.

A year or so ago, I suggested that the strongest voices of political opposition in the Balearics were, following PSOE's kicking at the polls, those of non-political parties, such as GOB. At the time, it had become involved in the campaign to keep TV Mallorca on air, a matter that wasn't its to become involved in. Prior to this, in March 2010, it had joined an anti-corruption "platform" alongside the OCB (Obra Cultural Balear). It does have an association, if not a formal one, with the Catalan language and culture promoters, the OCB.

This association was such that the two organisations were "overlooked" when invitations were being handed out for President Bauzà's inauguration last year. They were not overlooked by the UGT union in the Balearics when it was handing out its annual May Day "mentions" this year; they both received awards.

The two are not joined at the hip, but together they represent a loose union of similar interests. GOB is the environmental division of a broad, left-wing Catalanist movement. As such, it is an organisation that is poles apart from the Partido Popular. While GOB has strong arguments on environmental matters (and I don't necessarily disagree with GOB on either Es Trenc or Son Reus), one cannot lose sight of the political dimension or of its opposition to the PP. "Ultima Hora" once suggested that GOB had been "silent" when the Unió Mallorquina, Mallorcan nationalist if not left-wing, and PSOE had initially put forward the "decreto Nadal" which, among other things, was intended to allow hotels to build on their land. The paper implied that there would not have been the same "silence" had the decreto emanated from the PP. Yet, there are some similarities between this and the PP's new tourism law, to which Sra. Ramis voiced her opposition in the interview.

There has to be a trade-off between the economy and the environment. Ideally, there wouldn't be, but one will always tend to prevail, and it is usually the economy, which in Mallorca means tourism. And on tourism, Sra. Ramis came out with an extraordinary statement. I quote: "Eco and activity tourism has become big business", implying that eco tourism is a way forward for Mallorca. But what does this mean? Indeed, how can eco tourism be big business? Only if there are great numbers of tourists. And eco tourism ceases to be "eco" if there is human pressure. Moreover, eco tourism is more applicable to underdeveloped tourism economies, and Mallorca most certainly isn't one of these.

Let me say that I have much sympathy for what GOB stands for and for what it campaigns on. It is a vital voice in Mallorca, its conscience if you like. This is why Sra. Ramis is influential. But GOB has to decide what it really is. It was once challenged to put up or shut up by coming out as an explicitly political entity, which was harsh, as pressure groups can and should stand aside from the everyday political process. However, its political nature cannot be denied. There are other questions Sra. Ramis needs to be asked.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - The non-replacement of the Balearics British Consul

The controversy surrounding the non-replacement of Paul Abrey as British Consul to the Balearics and the decision to centre consular operations in Barcelona while still bringing in a second Vice-Consul to the Palma consulate continues. The "Diario" now quotes the vice-president of the Ciudadanos Europeos de Baleares who says, among other things, that the non-replacement will mean dealing with certain matters of bureaucracy more difficult.

Some points: This organisation, the Ciudadanos Europeos, has been absent from any other reports of the affair until now, making one wonder why it is now making its voice heard. Indeed, what is this organisation? What exactly will be so much more difficult because there is no Consul as such? Why do reports constantly refer to 50,000 British residents on the Balearics? This one says that, in addition, there are 80,000 Britons who alternate their place of residence, so the 50,000 have to be those who are permanent residents. Well, where are they? Because they certainly aren't in official population figures that are released each year. The official figure is at least half this number.

See more: Diario de Mallorca

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 3 December 2012

No Frills Excursions


Morning high (7.30am): 12C
Forecast high: 17C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): West 4 to 5, locally Northwest 6 during the morning.

A starry, starry night and a clear morning. Warmer than of late today and sunny all day. Winds picking up tomorrow, there being an alert for coastal and sea conditions.

Evening update (19.30): A fine, sunny day with a local high of 17.7C. Tomorrow, Wednesday and Thursday will be windy but mostly sunny.

MALLORCA TODAY - Armed robbery at Can Picafort supermarket

The Guardia Civil are hunting for two men with South American accents who stole some 200 euros from a "well-known" supermarket in Can Picafort on Saturday evening. A gun and a knife were used in the attack, said to have been carried out by inexperienced robbers.

See more: Ultima Hora

Cinderella And The Magic Orbs: A Majorcan pantomime

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away that was called England, there lived a young girl called Cinderella. Actually, her name wasn't Cinderella - I've made it up - it was in fact Tracy, but Tracy doesn't sound terribly panto-ish.

Anyway, Tracy (aka Cinderella) dreamt of the day when she could go on holiday to a place where the sun shone all day and where happy, smiling locals were forever happy and smiling. 

Prince Charming
For no good reason, except that Cinderella always starts in this way, Cinderella found herself in a woods one day, where it just so happened, as these things do, that a hunt was taking place. Purely by chance, she encountered a handsome young tourism minister from a different land far, far away.
"My title is Prince Charming, but you can call me Carlos," he said.
"What are those two egg-shaped things on your head?" enquired Cinderella.
"Oh these? Why, they're my, erm, they're my magic sea-grass orbs."
"Your what!?"
"Magic sea-grass orbs. They are formed from the beautiful sea-grass meadows that surround the beautiful, velvety white beaches of my beautiful paradise island that I and fellow members of my government diligently preserve through a strict environmental policy that allows virgin beaches to be destroyed on average only once every six months."
"It does indeed sound magical, fine sir," replied Cinderella. "But are you sure they're not a deer's testicles?"
"Heavens no, my dear, in my land we look after all God's creatures as if they were our own children."

The Ugly Sisters
Cinderella was in a whirl as she raced home. Her head was full of beautiful images of this beautiful land that Prince Charming called My-orca. This was the land she had dreamt of. She had to tell her Two Ugly Sisters all about it. Unfortunately for Cinderella, Chantelle and Kylie had already heard about it. My-orca was a land, so they said, with a limitless supply of Class-A drugs, industrial quantities of cheap alcohol, ample opportunities for balcony sports and bedloads of Latino waiter sorts with extremely high testosterone levels. They said it was a paradise, an all-inclusive paradise. "You can get off your face all day, every day, for FREE."

This couldn't be the same land. Cinderella took herself off to her room and drifted into sleep, thinking of Prince Charming's magic orbs and wondering if she might one day get to feel their real magic.

Ebenezer Scrooge
In Cinderella's dream, she was asleep. She did not see the evil villain appear. Behind you! He's behind you! She felt his icy touch and screamed: "Count Dracula. You're not meant to be in a panto."
"Oh but I am," he salivated. "I'm running the pantomime. It's all mine. All mine. And now I'm going to suck every last euro from you. Money, money, money. All mine. All mine. Taxes, taxes, taxes. All mine."
"Stop! You're not Dracula. You're the King of My-orca. The land with beautiful velvety white beaches and magic sea-grass orbs. Prince Charming said so."
"Pah! Prince Charming. My great rival Carlos. Talking a load of balls as usual. Now just lie there quietly while I ingest your centimos."
"No, no, no, you're not Dracula, you're ... you're. Ebenezer Scrooge?" (Boo, hiss.)
"Ebenezer Bauzà, to be correct. All Christmas bonuses for public workers in My-orca are banned as part of ongoing austerity measures forced upon us by an incompetent socialist regime. Bah humbug!"

The Fairy Godmother
Cinderella woke with a jolt. What was that racket in her room? And who was this woman with huge, comedy fake breasts, a tight silver number and an elongated sex aid?
"Oh, so you've woken up then."
"Who are you?" retorted Cinderella. "And what are you doing in my bedroom. Are you a pervy?"
"Oh, thanks very much. Can't you see what I've got in my hand? A magic wand, batteries included. I'm your Fairy Godmother."
"You're a drag act."
"Artist, darling, artist. I've got a season sorted in Maga next year."
"Oh, Fairy Godmother, I have had such a nightmare. A horrid king won't pay his people, so poor Tiny Tomeu will have no Christmas this year. And my Ugly Sisters say that My-orca is not a land of dreams. Whatever should I do? I do so want to see Prince Charming, the velvety white beaches and his magic orbs."
"With my magic wand I can make My-orca anything you want. I just sprinkle a little stardust, get the karaoke machine out and transport you back to the innocent days of Dusty. 'Again I would wander where memories enfold me. There on the beautiful island of dreams. Far, far away on the island of dreams.' "
"That's a beautiful song, Fairy Godmother. Please wave your magic wand. But please also tell me. Prince Charming? Is he for real?"
Fairy Godmother (to audience): "Well, is he?"
"OH NO HE ISN'T."

(This "panto" first appeared in the "Majorca Daily Bulletin" on 1 December.)

Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Real Mallorca 1 : 1 Real Zaragoza

Dubbed their first final of the season, 17th-placed Mallorca, having slumped so badly in the league, needed a win against Zaragoza, three points and three spots above them. The home side showed far greater ambition than of late and were given the perfect opportunity after 13 minutes when Glenn Loovens, the former Celtic and Cardiff Dutch international, was sent off for a second bookable offence for fouling Nsue in the area. Victor, though, saw his penalty saved. One-man down, penalty missed, and what happened? Postiga put Zaragoza ahead two minutes later. With the one-man advantage, Caparrós replaced defender Ximo with an additional attacker, Giovani Dos Santos coming on just before the half hour. Mallorca dominant but one down at half-time. The dominance continued into the second period but with little to show for it. Another more attacking player, Fernández, replaced Bigas with a quarter of an hour to go, as Mallorca pressed, Nsue very much to the fore, and finally, with five minutes left, it was Victor with a header who converted the dominance into an equaliser. A brave effort by Zaragoza, a point at least for Mallorca who stay 17th and next up have an away trip to Levante in seventh.

Mallorca:
Aouate; Ximo (Dos Santos 26), Geromel, Nunes, Bigas (Fernández 75); Pina, Márquez (Alfaro 60); Nsue, Victor, Pereira; Hemed
Goal: Victor (85)
Yellows: Pereira (42), Bigas (45), Victor (46)

Zaragoza:
Roberto; Sapunaru, Loovens, Alvaro, Abraham (Parades 74); Zuculini, Movilla (Pintér 89); Rodríguez (Mari 65), Apoño, Montañes; Postiga
Goal: Postiga (15)
Red: Loovens (13)
Yellows: Loovens (2), Sapunaru (27), Movilla (88)

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 2 December 2012

No Frills Excursions


Morning high (9.00am): 12C
Forecast high: 14C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): Northeast 4 to 6 easing during the morning to East and then Northwest 3 to 5.

A sunny morning, temperatures varying between 7 and 12 degrees in the local area. A fine day ahead and tomorrow as well when temperatures will recover somewhat. The week's forecast is reasonable, some risk of rain but a good deal of sun too, with highs of 15 or 16.

Afternoon update (17.30): Good deal of sun as promised, and warmer - a local high of 15.2C.

Sandcastle Wars

At the start of last month, a storm caused pine trees to be uprooted along Puerto Pollensa's pine walk and Pollensa town hall to ask the Costas Authority to pay rather greater attention to the pine walk than it had been. An aspect of local government in Mallorca that some may be unaware of is that land which is in the proximity of beaches and sea (and some land which isn't right next to the coast) is ultimately the responsibility of the Costas, i.e. the Balearics division of the Costas, itself a part of the national environment ministry and so therefore part of the national government. The town halls work in co-operation (usually) with the Costas in managing this land as well as the beaches themselves, but it is the Costas which have the final say.

Whether the Costas have taken any notice of the request for better maintenance of the pine walk I don't know, but they have addressed a matter in Puerto Pollensa that is obviously far more urgent. In a manner to which many have become accustomed in understanding how the Costas operate, they have marched in with their heavy boots and, metaphorically if not physically, trampled all over the elaborate sandcastles that are built on a tiny part of beach near to the quay which leads to the yacht club. They have fined the bloke who builds the sandcastles. Fined him just over two grand.

The justifications for the fine are that the chap has no permission to build the castles and that they occupy public space, thus denying other beach users the use of this space which is, in any event, the property of the state. The Costas also suggest that the sandcastle man has benefited financially. The fine is said to equate to what the Costas believe he has received. The sandcastle man says he has not received a single euro.

Whether he has received money from admiring tourists or whether he hasn't, the Costas action is heavy-handed to say the least. Though the sandcastles endure through the summer, they are not, by their very nature, permanent structures. They are in fact quite marvellous pieces of art and skill that have become something of an attraction in their own right. They do not deny beachgoers the use of beach because there is plenty more beach to go around. The fine is an utter nonsense.

In British newspaper cliché style, the Costas action is an example of "the world going mad", a cliché I would normally avoid like the plague, but in this instance it is probably appropriate. It is jobsworthyism of the highest order. Pollensa town hall, for its part, says there is nothing to stop the building of sandcastles and that, in any event, their building is not included among those activities that the Costas demand the town hall to rubber-stamp (like, for instance, contracts for managing the beaches, a subject about which we are only too familiar). All one can say is thank Heavens there isn't a procedure which requires permission to build sandcastles; the whole matter is totally ridiculous.

There is, however, a further aspect to all this. One that has not, as far as I am aware, become a factor in Puerto Pollensa sandcastle building, but which is elsewhere on the island and is one that would also be of interest to the Costas but which is of even greater interest to police forces.

Over the summers of 2010 and 2011, a sandcastle war developed on Playa de Palma. It was one that elements of the local Spanish media delighted in reporting, as they could wheel out the M-word (mafia) and state that the war was all the work of Romanians, and Romanian "mafias" specifically. (The local press appears to take special pleasure in being able to single out certain foreign nationalities.)

The war involved extortion, as sandcastle builders were clearly receiving a financial benefit and a pretty reasonable one at that. It also involved the destruction of rival sandcastles and the castles being the centre for other activities, for example the sale of drugs. The problem got so bad last year that Palma town hall instructed the beach operator to level castles when it was cleaning beaches each evening. The operator had to have police accompaniment. Even this didn't do the trick, as the castles would be re-built.

The story of Playa de Palma's sandcastle war serves as a warning. Not because of what the Costas might seek to extract as a fine (which is an absurdity) but because of how sandcastle building, an innocent activity one would think, can turn into something that is rather more sinister.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Weather Alcúdia and Pollensa 1 December 2012

 No Frills Excursions


Morning high (9.15am): 11.5C
Forecast high: 14C
Sea conditions (northern Mallorca): Northeast 3 to 4 reaching 5 and then 6 by this evening and waves from the Northeast to a height of two metres.

A rather blustery morning, feeling slightly warmer, despite the met office saying that another cold front is coming in. The possibility of a spot of rain this morning and mostly cloudy all day. Tomorrow looks to be sunnier but still distinctly chilly. Temperatures are set to rise from Monday.

Evening update (18.30): Little sun, as had been expected, and cold, the day's high not exceeding that of the morning, 11.5C.

MALLORCA TODAY - Party dissent and other matters at Pollensa town hall

The plenary session of Pollensa town hall on Thursday evening produced more than its fair share of "issues", more than usual even for a town hall as dysfunctional as Pollensa's. One matter concerned the abstention of a member of the La Lliga party on a motion regarding the removal of religious icons (i.e. the removal of the crucifix from the hall where the plenary sessions take place). This was evidence, it would seem, of the tensions caused by the formation of the new El Pi party between La Lliga and the Convergència, the councillor in question being in favour of this new formation whereas his two colleagues in La Lliga are not.

On other issues. There was a demand that mooring facilities at the military base in Puerto Pollensa are opened up to boats that come into the bay. The UMP (Unió Mollera Pollecina) again raised the question of special budgeting for the port alone and got nowhere. A motion requiring the Council of Mallorca to remove all obstacles along the Pollensa-Lluc walk was carried with the mayor's PP abstaining.

MALLORCA TODAY - Costas fine the Puerto Pollensa sandcastle builder

Well, is this absurd or is it the rightful application of the law? The chap who builds the large and complex sandcastles on the Albercutx beach in Puerto Pollensa is to be fined over 2,000 euros by the Costas authority, the reason being that the sandcastle infringes rules on the occupying of public space on a beach.

See more: Diario de Mallorca

Fighting Them On The Beaches

Some years ago, I was given an insight into how the tendering process for awarding beach-management contracts went. It is probably best that I don't go into any detail or to identify the beach in question, but suffice it to say that it was an eye-opener, though one which only really served to confirm what one knows - that there is far more to such contracts than meets the eye.

Since gaining that insight, I have been something of a keen student of beach-management affairs, though there would be little to actually study if it weren't for the fact that three of the four main resorts in the north of the island are constantly subject to some form of shenanigans. Of the four - Can Picafort, Playa de Muro, Puerto Alcúdia and Puerto Pollensa - only Alcúdia operates without any odd carryings-on. The other three do, and they are sometimes related.

Which brings me to the quite extraordinary state of affairs surrounding Playa de Muro's beach and, by incrimination, Puerto Pollensa's. A concessionaire on Muro's beach, Gabriel Moranta, has set out "denuncias" with the Guardia Civil with regard to vandalism of sunbeds during the summer and expressed his suspicion that the vandalism, which has cost him, he says, 50,000 euros, has to do with the neighbourhood association (AAVV) that manages Puerto Pollensa's beach.  

To be so public in expressing this suspicion is astonishing, but the vandalism had aroused police suspicions that it was the work of a competitor and not just some act of random destruction. The grounds for the suspicion are tied up with the awarding of the Puerto Pollensa contract in 2011 to Moranta's company, F&A Beach. The AAVV had traditionally always managed the beach - for some 30 years at any rate. F&A then lost the contract for this year, and the AAVV regained it. The ill-feeling between these two concerns gave rise to and continues to cause a real old slanging match, F&A implicating Pollensa town hall by suggesting that it colluded with the AAVV in renewing its concession to manage the beach.

F&A is not the only party to express concern. Political groups in Pollensa have also done so. The award to the AAVV this year was met with questions regarding money that it previously owed the town hall and its ability to meet conditions of the renewed contract. This concern has been such that there has been a call for the public prosecutor to investigate what has been happening with the beach-management contracts in Puerto Pollensa.

These contracts are pretty lucrative. If they weren't, then there wouldn't be all the shenanigans. It probably is time for the prosecutor to take a good look, and not only in Puerto Pollensa.

Returning to the vandalism though, F&A is exploring the possibility of security cameras being mounted on lifeguard towers on Playa de Muro's beach. Muro town hall is said to be considering the request. While I can understand a desire for such cameras, they would have to be used under very strict conditions. Specifically, they would surely have to be switched on only at night-time. But their very presence, as they presumably would be visible and as there would have to be notices stating that there are cameras, would not be welcome.

Permissions for surveillance cameras that are trained on the "public way" (and beaches are the public way) have to be sought, owing to the strictness of privacy laws, and there is a precedent for Muro to consider. This concerned the installation of webcams at hotel sites that were trained onto beaches in response to the ETA threat in 2009. One of these cameras was at the Sunwing Resort in Alcúdia, and their presence really only came to light as part of investigations into the former tourism minister, Miguel Nadal. Among issues that were raised were who actually controlled the cameras, who was looking at their images and what happened with any images that were stored.

Much as I sympathise with F&A, I, as a user of Playa de Muro beach, would be dead against cameras, strict conditions or not. They send out entirely the wrong message.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.