Twelve Days Of Christmas - Mallorca Style

The thing with Christmas carols is that they tend to be international. Hence, for example, "Silent Night" is "Noche de paz" in Spanish. I am unaware, however, of the "The Twelve Days Of Christmas" having been internationalised or specifically, and for my purposes, Catalanised or Castellanised.

There is some evidence to suggest that "The Twelve Days Of Christmas" wasn't originally English but French. Given a certain similarity between French and Catalan, then it may be that a version has slipped into Catalan consciousness. Or did, and then very rapidly fell out again.

In the absence of there being a local version, we'll have to do with the English, which itself causes a problem as there isn't one wholly (or even holy) agreed-to set of twelve days. The Lords, for instance, can amount to ten as well as twelve or even only nine. For the most part, however, it is just the later days of Christmas that can cause some controversy as to how many of what are actually involved. The earlier days are generally consistent across their different versions, though there are some variants on the four number of birds - colly (whatever a colly bird is - Paul Collingwood scoring a duck?), corley, collie (which is a dog) or canary (which is a bird, unless it's an island).

Anyway, let's just settle on one set of twelve days and consider how applicable "The Twelve Days Of Christmas" are to Mallorca. So here goes, and remember to sing along.

A Partridge In A Pear Tree. Yep, well partridge is certainly Mallorcan. There is even a fair devoted to its slaughter; it takes place in Montuïri in December, appropriately enough for Christmas. Of fruit trees, one is more inclined to think of oranges or lemons, but pear trees there are. Muro town hall, for instance, has held courses on the organic growing of pear trees, among other things, which is terribly ecologicially sound of them.

Two Turtle Doves. No problem with these. They are regular visitors and are best observed in May and June time at different locations, e.g. the Galatzó finca in Calvià or Albufera.

Three French Hens. There are plenty of chickens knocking around of course. Whether they are specifically French or not is hard to say. We'll place a query against the hens.

Four Colly Birds. The question is: what is a colly bird? It isn't a calling bird, though the blackbird has a call, and a colly bird is a blackbird. I get blackbirds in the garden.

Five Gold Rings. Easy. Many a gold ring, especially on the fingers of Russian tourists who, I would advise, should start to become wary about their blatant displays of bling as there will be those disposed to divesting them of it.

Six Geese A Laying. Geese, there are.

Seven Swans A Swimming. As there are also swans.

Eight Maids A Milking. It is probable that one could round up at least eight maids who engage in milking. As for cows, yes, but when do you ever actually see a cow in Mallorca?

Nine Drummers Drumming. Nine, nine hundred, nine thousand. Absolutely no shortage of drummers. Local music bands, batucada samba bands, the folk music drummers who hammer out an incessant beat during fiesta celebrations such as the demons of Sant Antoni.

Ten Pipers Piping. Like the drummers, there are pipers in abundance. The Mallorcan bagpipe, the xeremia, is a familiar sound at fiesta time.

Eleven Ladies Dancing. Not a lot of problems finding eleven women. Not sure about ladies, but females certainly. The Mallorcan traditional dance, ball de bot, has many a lady, as does any club you care to mention and any collection of British expatriates who are obsessed with "Strictly Come Dancing".

Twelve Lords A Leaping. This is really the only tricky one. There aren't any Lords as such, unless you include Lord Archer or Lord Lloyd-Webber when in residence.

The Lords notwithstanding, "The Twelve Days Of Christmas" does pretty much stack up in a Mallorcan context, and so here is your chance to annoy everyone by trying your hand at "Els Dotze Dies De Nadal". One, two, three ...

Una perdiu en una perera
Dues tórtores
Tres gallines franceses
Quatre merles
Cinc anells d'or
Sis oques ponent
Set cignes nedant
Vuit donzelles munyint
Nou tamborers tocant (la bateria)
Deu xeremiers tocant (sa xeremia)
Onze dames ballant
Dotze senyors saltant

MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYONE.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.