I have a confession to make. I am writing this article having just woken up from a siesta. This might not sound like much of a confession but it is for someone who has long eschewed the daytime snooze, however much there does seem sense in taking a "power nap"; and when it's called a power nap, it has the virtue of sounding as if it will lead to one's productivity being enhanced.
I'm excusing myself on account of having been one of the many who has succumbed to the Mallorcan flu and who is still recovering from it. In the circumstances, being knackered by the afternoon is not perhaps so unusual. But were it not for this enduring malady, given as it is March and not a time for hot weather (despite the most unexpected 27 degrees on Monday), there would - or should - be no excuse at all.
I am well aware of the theory that the Spanish working man (and sometimes woman) was so impoverished and poorly treated that more than one job was needed and that a consequence of this was the requirement for an afternoon kip in between lousily paid toils. The weather theory, though, is that much more persuasive (and true), and it is not as if Spain was the only Mediterranean country where the practice of a siesta and its equivalent was developed. Yes, in the heat of summer, there was and is much to be said for having a short burst of shuteye in a cooled, shutter-tight room. But at other times of the year ...?
The afternoon break, which doesn't necessarily entail sleeping, is a cultural habit. It is said that it is one that has become less ingrained into society, especially in places dominated by commerce; the larger towns and cities, therefore. Palma qualifies as one of these, and yet the bizarre phenomenon of four rush hours in one day continues. Additional pollution and greater spend on petrol (the most expensive in Spain as it is) are thus added to productive downsides of the afternoon break.
This break, siesta, call it what you will is just one element of the working day that academics, business associations and some politicians wish to amend. And joining their ranks is the national broadcaster; RTVE is bringing evening prime-time programming forward by an hour. In an act of unselfish altruism aimed at getting the Spaniard to turn in earlier, its nightly top shows (such as they are) will start at 10.15. Yes, you have read this correctly. A quarter past ten. And it will mean that going to bed will be around 2am rather than 3am. It shouldn't be so late but it can be because prime-time TV is prime-time advertising time. Slots for this are like programmes in their own right. On, on and on they go. So long are they that on one occasion when watching "The Shawshank Redemption" (in Spanish), it felt as though I had spent as long watching it as Tim Robbins had in digging his tunnel.
Different solutions to the working day have been advanced. The national commission for its rationalisation has been beating the drum for several years for a conformity with a norm of nine-to-five, insofar as this is the norm in other countries. Its principal concern is productivity, an aspect of which is the fact that Spaniards, as a rule, work longer hours than European counterparts. But these longer hours do not equate to being more productive. Parkinson's Law might have been developed with Spain in mind - work expands to fill the time available. Plus the time that is added on to take account of a lengthy afternoon break, which is a necessity if you have been watching telly into the wee small hours as much as it is a cultural habit.
Then there is the Greenwich Mean Time solution, one that has a great deal of logic given that the Meridian passes through Spain, that GMT was once upon a time used and that Portugal and the Canary Islands operate according to it. Such logic, though, runs up against cultural habit. The commission would like everyone to be working by 9am at the latest, to have finished work by 6pm at the latest, to not have had an extended breakfast break and to not have had a siesta. If they all finished by 6pm, then RTVE could presumably make its prime-time programming start very much earlier. But there is still one flaw in this plan. Dinner. Still, if there were a readjustment of the working day, then dinner might no longer be taken at the same time as the evening's main telly shows will be starting.
Might this ever happen? Somehow, you would doubt it. Cultural habits die hard, while maybe there is something to be said for thumbing a nose at generally-accepted working-day convention.
Showing posts with label Television. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Television. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 04, 2015
Wednesday, November 12, 2014
Microgroove Sensation: Radio and TV
When they were tuning the TV in, they were probably benefiting from the original test card that TVE used. This comprised what looked like a games board with five mysterious circles. Prior to that first broadcast in 1956, there must have been households who were glued to the test card, listening to the voice reminding them that 28 October was the big day.
It is worth bearing in mind that in Britain the first commercial television channel, ITV, started in 1955. The development of consumerism was a factor of 1950s Britain as well. At the same time as ITV was launching, in Mallorca and most of Spain there was no consumerism and certainly no telly. So, in the absence of television, it was the radio which was the main source of home entertainment, and in Mallorca that meant, unsurprisingly, Radio Mallorca.
Founded by the brothers José and Onofre Fuster, Radio Mallorca first broadcast in November 1933. Ten years later it became part of the Sociedad Española de Radiodifusión and it enjoyed a monopoly until two other stations emerged. One was called Radio Juventud (youth radio, if you like) and the other was Radio Popular, which started broadcasting in 1959. It was under the auspices of the Bishop of Mallorca, so you can probably imagine that it adopted particular attitudes to content, but one thing that was notable about Radio Popular was that much of its programming was in Mallorquín, unlike the other two stations. Though it was essentially a church broadcaster, it didn't deal only in religious shows. It came to be highly significant because, in addition to using the local language, it put out programmes which discussed local culture and heritage. It played, therefore, an important role in starting a revival of Mallorcan culture that hadn't been subjugated by the Franco regime but which equally hadn't been given any great deal of prominence.
It would be wrong, though, to think that Radio Popular was all religion and culture, because enter into the equation a young presenter by the name of Miquel Vives Martí. He was to transform Radio Popular by introducing youthful programming, including a sort of Top 40 music show. Radio Popular and Radio Mallorca, from the early 1960s, went pretty much head to head, but if Vives was the mastermind of music on Radio Popular, over at Radio Mallorca there was another young presenter who arguably became the most important voice ever of Mallorcan radio. And he was Miguel Soler.
Born in Murcia in 1939, Soler's ambition was to be a journalist. As it happens, he became one - with "Ultima Hora" - but he also became, at the age of twenty-one, the driving-force behind youthful music shows at Radio Mallorca. In 1961 he came up with the idea for a show called "Torneo en microsurco" (tournament of microgroove). The show which went out every week day at quarter past two was a sensation.
Of course, what both Soler and Vives could play was subject to restriction. It was primarily Spanish music that wouldn't fall foul of a regime that could no more understand Elvis than it could permit him; which was to subsequently also be the case with The Beatles. But some American music was allowed: Paul Anka, for example. So long as it was bland and uncontroversial, it was ok.
Radio Mallorca still exists. It celebrated its eightieth anniversary last year, and earlier this year Miguel Soler produced a book - "El club de los 60" - a collection of writings for "Ultima Hora" from back in the day and of stories of others who were to the vanguard during the unforgettable years of the 1960s.
The television set in Colonia Sant Pere doubtless caused its own sensation, but in 1964 radio dominated, and so did Miguel Soler.
Photo: The TVE test card.
Thursday, April 17, 2014
Mallorca's Salad (Sic) Days
The word "sic" is directly lifted from Latin. Its literal meaning is "thus". It has come to be used in the written form as a means of highlighting an error, such as a misspelling, a malapropism or simply wrong usage. It is commonly used to poke fun, which is appropriate, as there is so much fun that one can have with Latin and linguistic arguments in Mallorca.
These arguments are ones with which we are all too familiar. They centre on Catalan or not Catalan and, for the linguistically uninitiated or couldn't-care-lesses (sic), they are frequently arcane to the point of being beyond comprehension or stupid to the point of long having dispensed with common sense or rationality.
Of course, one man's language is his to defend, as indeed is an alternative language or dialect, so one can't and shouldn't be too dismissive of another man's language argument. However, there are occasions when intrusion into someone else's argument is required, if only to highlight what might appear to be the pettiness of the debate.
While the polemic in Mallorca is one which typically embraces the linguistic parallel universes of Catalan and Castellano, there is an idiomatic black hole which exists in the Catalan universe, inside which resides mini-universes that have diverged from Vulgar Latin roots. This is a divergence, the peculiarity of which is made even more peculiar by the fact that it centres on what in original Latin was that language's set of intensive pronouns. In Latin there is no such thing as a definite or indefinite article - "the" or "a". In Catalan there most definitely is. Or rather, there most definitely are.
Ipse, ipsa, ipsum. You can blame all of them because they are at the heart of the row that has found its way into the Balearic parliament. In the Mallorquín dialect (and in a few other Catalan dialects), these pronouns led to a localised Vulgarisation of the article. It is why Mallorquín uses "es" and "sa" instead of the normal Catalan "el" and "la" (the same as Castellano therefore).
This Mallorquín branch line of definite article usage is known as the "article salat". In Castellano "salat" becomes "salado". The salad days aren't so much salad days of innocence as salad days of the linguistic argument having its heyday. They're arguing over the bloody definite article.
This has all arisen because the Mallorcan broadcaster IB3 has started to use "es" and "sa" in its news reports instead of "el" and "la". Why should this inspire an argument? Believe it or not, and you will believe it, it all has to do with the Partido Popular regional government's antagonism towards Catalan. There has been an outcry. The accusation is that the government is interfering with the editorial independence of IB3 (and this is not the first time that it has been accused of doing so) by pressing its anti-Catalan agenda and its pro-Balearic dialects agenda as a complement to Castellano.
Both forms of the article are commonly used in Mallorca, but there is a general distinction made in terms of literary/more formal usage and everyday usage. The Catalan article is used for the former. Hence, it might be deemed appropriate for news reports. This is how opponents of the introduction of the "salat" see things. They also see the use of the "salat" as a deliberate ploy to undermine Catalan.
The government insists that the "salat" usage reflects colloquial speech and that its use by IB3 "dignifies" linguistic peculiarities. But the government's vice-president, Antonio Gómez, who, it just so happens, was for a time the director-general of IB3, isn't saying who made the decision to adopt it. At the Universitat de les Illes Balears, where linguistic standards tend to be decided, the view is that the "salat" damages the standard use of Catalan and that it introduces conflict where none had previously existed. This, unfortunately, sums up how the government has conducted its language policy. It has sought fights, and its increasing unpopularity reflects what have been, for the most part, unnecessary fights.
These arguments are ones with which we are all too familiar. They centre on Catalan or not Catalan and, for the linguistically uninitiated or couldn't-care-lesses (sic), they are frequently arcane to the point of being beyond comprehension or stupid to the point of long having dispensed with common sense or rationality.
Of course, one man's language is his to defend, as indeed is an alternative language or dialect, so one can't and shouldn't be too dismissive of another man's language argument. However, there are occasions when intrusion into someone else's argument is required, if only to highlight what might appear to be the pettiness of the debate.
While the polemic in Mallorca is one which typically embraces the linguistic parallel universes of Catalan and Castellano, there is an idiomatic black hole which exists in the Catalan universe, inside which resides mini-universes that have diverged from Vulgar Latin roots. This is a divergence, the peculiarity of which is made even more peculiar by the fact that it centres on what in original Latin was that language's set of intensive pronouns. In Latin there is no such thing as a definite or indefinite article - "the" or "a". In Catalan there most definitely is. Or rather, there most definitely are.
Ipse, ipsa, ipsum. You can blame all of them because they are at the heart of the row that has found its way into the Balearic parliament. In the Mallorquín dialect (and in a few other Catalan dialects), these pronouns led to a localised Vulgarisation of the article. It is why Mallorquín uses "es" and "sa" instead of the normal Catalan "el" and "la" (the same as Castellano therefore).
This Mallorquín branch line of definite article usage is known as the "article salat". In Castellano "salat" becomes "salado". The salad days aren't so much salad days of innocence as salad days of the linguistic argument having its heyday. They're arguing over the bloody definite article.
This has all arisen because the Mallorcan broadcaster IB3 has started to use "es" and "sa" in its news reports instead of "el" and "la". Why should this inspire an argument? Believe it or not, and you will believe it, it all has to do with the Partido Popular regional government's antagonism towards Catalan. There has been an outcry. The accusation is that the government is interfering with the editorial independence of IB3 (and this is not the first time that it has been accused of doing so) by pressing its anti-Catalan agenda and its pro-Balearic dialects agenda as a complement to Castellano.
Both forms of the article are commonly used in Mallorca, but there is a general distinction made in terms of literary/more formal usage and everyday usage. The Catalan article is used for the former. Hence, it might be deemed appropriate for news reports. This is how opponents of the introduction of the "salat" see things. They also see the use of the "salat" as a deliberate ploy to undermine Catalan.
The government insists that the "salat" usage reflects colloquial speech and that its use by IB3 "dignifies" linguistic peculiarities. But the government's vice-president, Antonio Gómez, who, it just so happens, was for a time the director-general of IB3, isn't saying who made the decision to adopt it. At the Universitat de les Illes Balears, where linguistic standards tend to be decided, the view is that the "salat" damages the standard use of Catalan and that it introduces conflict where none had previously existed. This, unfortunately, sums up how the government has conducted its language policy. It has sought fights, and its increasing unpopularity reflects what have been, for the most part, unnecessary fights.
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Sleepy Time: Spanish kids and education
"It's often past midnight, well past midnight and you can hear the boy and what's probably a TV. This isn't just weekends by any means. And then you can hear them getting up at seven the next morning. Maybe he has a siesta, but if not, he's surely suffering from sleep deprivation. It can't be good. And it's been like this for some years. He's fourteen now, but it was a similar pattern when he was much younger."
This is the drift of what I was told by someone (English) who lives in a semi and whose neighbours are Mallorcan. Being a semi, you can hear something of what goes on next door and you are aware of people being up late. It is only one story, but how typical is it? How normal is it for Spanish kids (and indeed kids from other nationalities) to be up until past midnight and to seemingly get too little sleep? Quite normal, you might tend to think.
The broadcaster Telecinco has been criticised for showing "La Voz Kids", the children's version of "The Voice", between 10pm and 1.25am on Thursday nights. The average viewing figure for the show was 5.1 million in all. When the final was broadcast, ratings data suggested that over 300,000 viewers were children. They may not all have watched to the end, but you would guess that most did.
Spanish TV programmes have a tendency to go on for an inordinately long time. Partly this is because of interminable and regular ad breaks. Partly it is because they are simply over long. Put these two factors together and you get a show that lasts for almost three and a half hours, one that doesn't start until 10pm on a weekday. If you take my anecdote, then you can add other examples of late broadcasting which are keeping children awake into the early morning.
Television is only element. It's a cultural thing, so the justification goes. We are all familiar with the sight of children being up and around late in Mallorca. It is nothing unusual. But is it good for them? Has this cultural fact of life been a contributory factor in educational underperformance, something which is more acute in Mallorca and the Balearics than in most other other parts of Spain?
Towards the end of 2012, the Spanish Institute for Sleep Research launched a campaign called "I Have a Dream". It was designed to promote better sleeping habits among children. What the institute was mainly concerned with were the health consequences of inadequate sleep - obesity and the development of diabetes - but it also considered educational performance and the effects of late-night TV watching and computer screen use. Its director was in doubt that fewer hours of sleep plus the wrong signals being sent to the brain by this late-night viewing were contributing to attention deficit syndrome. He said that 60% of Spanish children got less sleep than is recommended, that 30% displayed symptoms of daytime sleepiness, that there had been an ongoing tendency since the mid-1980s for children to go to bed later and that two-thirds of kids between the ages of ten and fifteen made the decision themselves as to what time they went to bed.
Research published in 2011 studied sleep among children from the ages of two to nine in different European countries. It found, among other things, that the percentage of children in, for instance, Germany, who slept between ten and eleven hours was almost 28%. For Spain, the percentage was under 5%. But other international research, published last year by the Boston College in the US, showed that, for maths teaching, Spanish teachers reported that 38% of pupils suffered from a lack of sleep. This was a comparatively low percentage. A higher one was for Finnish pupils. 60% of them suffered from lack of sleep, and yet maths performance is very much higher in Finland than Spain.
A conclusion that was drawn from the Boston research was that the use of phones and computers (to which could be added TVs) late at night was resulting in the lack of sleep and was a particular problem in more affluent countries. Does this mean, therefore, that Spain is a comparatively less affluent country?
Drawing firm conclusions as to the relationship between sleep and the school performance of Spanish children is difficult because of apparent contradictions between these different pieces of research. And in any event, does research for Spain as a whole equate to the situation in Mallorca?
It may be right to criticise broadcasters, but before people get too critical or draw inaccurate conclusions, perhaps there ought to be thorough research into the sleep of children in different parts of Spain and the relationship with school performance. Only then might it be possible to say for sure that Mallorcan kids need more sleep or don't.
This is the drift of what I was told by someone (English) who lives in a semi and whose neighbours are Mallorcan. Being a semi, you can hear something of what goes on next door and you are aware of people being up late. It is only one story, but how typical is it? How normal is it for Spanish kids (and indeed kids from other nationalities) to be up until past midnight and to seemingly get too little sleep? Quite normal, you might tend to think.
The broadcaster Telecinco has been criticised for showing "La Voz Kids", the children's version of "The Voice", between 10pm and 1.25am on Thursday nights. The average viewing figure for the show was 5.1 million in all. When the final was broadcast, ratings data suggested that over 300,000 viewers were children. They may not all have watched to the end, but you would guess that most did.
Spanish TV programmes have a tendency to go on for an inordinately long time. Partly this is because of interminable and regular ad breaks. Partly it is because they are simply over long. Put these two factors together and you get a show that lasts for almost three and a half hours, one that doesn't start until 10pm on a weekday. If you take my anecdote, then you can add other examples of late broadcasting which are keeping children awake into the early morning.
Television is only element. It's a cultural thing, so the justification goes. We are all familiar with the sight of children being up and around late in Mallorca. It is nothing unusual. But is it good for them? Has this cultural fact of life been a contributory factor in educational underperformance, something which is more acute in Mallorca and the Balearics than in most other other parts of Spain?
Towards the end of 2012, the Spanish Institute for Sleep Research launched a campaign called "I Have a Dream". It was designed to promote better sleeping habits among children. What the institute was mainly concerned with were the health consequences of inadequate sleep - obesity and the development of diabetes - but it also considered educational performance and the effects of late-night TV watching and computer screen use. Its director was in doubt that fewer hours of sleep plus the wrong signals being sent to the brain by this late-night viewing were contributing to attention deficit syndrome. He said that 60% of Spanish children got less sleep than is recommended, that 30% displayed symptoms of daytime sleepiness, that there had been an ongoing tendency since the mid-1980s for children to go to bed later and that two-thirds of kids between the ages of ten and fifteen made the decision themselves as to what time they went to bed.
Research published in 2011 studied sleep among children from the ages of two to nine in different European countries. It found, among other things, that the percentage of children in, for instance, Germany, who slept between ten and eleven hours was almost 28%. For Spain, the percentage was under 5%. But other international research, published last year by the Boston College in the US, showed that, for maths teaching, Spanish teachers reported that 38% of pupils suffered from a lack of sleep. This was a comparatively low percentage. A higher one was for Finnish pupils. 60% of them suffered from lack of sleep, and yet maths performance is very much higher in Finland than Spain.
A conclusion that was drawn from the Boston research was that the use of phones and computers (to which could be added TVs) late at night was resulting in the lack of sleep and was a particular problem in more affluent countries. Does this mean, therefore, that Spain is a comparatively less affluent country?
Drawing firm conclusions as to the relationship between sleep and the school performance of Spanish children is difficult because of apparent contradictions between these different pieces of research. And in any event, does research for Spain as a whole equate to the situation in Mallorca?
It may be right to criticise broadcasters, but before people get too critical or draw inaccurate conclusions, perhaps there ought to be thorough research into the sleep of children in different parts of Spain and the relationship with school performance. Only then might it be possible to say for sure that Mallorcan kids need more sleep or don't.
Thursday, February 13, 2014
The Hybrid Expatriate
Seven years ago I came across an article in the newspaper "ADN" that was written by Montserrat Dominguez, a quite well-known journalist both in print and on the television. This was what she had to say: "ITV is showing a series called "Benidorm", which tells the adventures of a group of tourists. The action centres on an all-inclusive complex. The tourists neither have to leave (this complex) nor do they have to eat paella. Did I say paella? Excuse me, the Brits enjoy fish and chips, porridge, baked beans and other specialities of their cuisine; they don't try local dishes. Why would they risk this, given that their surroundings reproduce a scene in which they have pubs, music, tobacco and drinks. Why then do they come to Benidorm, to Mallorca, to the Costa Brava or to the Canaries? (They can go) without hearing a word of Castellano, Mallorquín or Catalan or, even worse, without discovering a slice of tortilla or a good pa amb oli."
In fact, Montserrat wasn't entirely accurate. To correct her, there was the episode in which Janice, bothering Mick while he was trying to read a copy of "The Sun", was criticising what had been available for lunch at the Solana. "I didn't think much to that. What was all that shite on the top? What was it called?" "Paella," replied Mick curtly. I know that the Garveys had paella, because I had seen the episode in question. But I hadn't seen it on the telly. I don't watch British telly. I don't have Sky. And because I don't watch British telly, I am therefore fully integrated and assimilated into local Mallorcan society.
Which is of course utter garbage. To go back to Montserrat's points of cultural reference, I have rarely had fish and chips in Mallorca, but I am partial to baked beans now and then, while porridge is good for you. Many is the Castellano, Mallorquín or Catalan word that I hear and even myself utter. And a good pa amb oli is a treat. There again, I'm not a tourist. Yet, Montserrat's description could, if you took out the all-inclusive setting, apply just as easily to the British expatriate. Or to one particular type. Possibly.
The fact that Montserrat was talking about a telly programme is pertinent to the debate caused by Sky satellites crashing to earth and leaving huge craters into which the expatriate community plunges as though into voids of cultural deprivation. I know there are no satellites falling to earth, but you could be forgiven for thinking that there were. Potential loss of the signal has heralded an expatriate tragedy of Shakespearean proportions. Without the telly, "oh, woe is me, t'have seen what I have seen, see what I see" but can no longer.
I suspect that many expatriates and not, it is probably fair to say, only British adopt a pick 'n' mix policy to their lives in Mallorca. They will pick some of the indigenous and some of the old country. And in so doing, they will be content. Until, that is, someone pipes up and commands them to abandon Sky forthwith and to go native, just like that someone has. This someone is the most insufferable of all expatriates -the holier-than-thou, converse normally only in Mallorquín, and let everyone know the fact expat.
While Montserrat's description of the British tourist - itself of course a gross generalisation - could equally apply to the expatriate, it would be to a species of "expatriatus in extremis". Granted, it does seem odd to stumble across such a rare species who has long planted Mallorcan roots but who is still incapable of doing the lingo to any greater extent than "dos cervezas, por favor", but why should it matter?
The pressure to make someone have to try and justify the degree of his or her integration (whatever this word means, because I really don't know that a satisfactory definition exists) is preposterous. Watching British telly is evidence of nothing other than watching British telly, but for some it is evidence of the existence of bad expat or good expat. Rubbish. It would be an extreme measure for someone to decide to pack up and "go back home" because Sky falls, but the fact that Sky, telly and various other forms of communication became so easily available is, I think it fair to argue, a reason (only one reason) why some people chose to come to Mallorca to live.
The communications industry in its different varieties can indeed make it appear as though the expatriate has moulded a style of life which is little Britain in the sun, but that isn't the fault of the expatriate. He or she is symptomatic of a cultural hybridism that has been facilitated through freedom of movement and fibre optics. And if he or she wants to watch British telly, then so be it.
In fact, Montserrat wasn't entirely accurate. To correct her, there was the episode in which Janice, bothering Mick while he was trying to read a copy of "The Sun", was criticising what had been available for lunch at the Solana. "I didn't think much to that. What was all that shite on the top? What was it called?" "Paella," replied Mick curtly. I know that the Garveys had paella, because I had seen the episode in question. But I hadn't seen it on the telly. I don't watch British telly. I don't have Sky. And because I don't watch British telly, I am therefore fully integrated and assimilated into local Mallorcan society.
Which is of course utter garbage. To go back to Montserrat's points of cultural reference, I have rarely had fish and chips in Mallorca, but I am partial to baked beans now and then, while porridge is good for you. Many is the Castellano, Mallorquín or Catalan word that I hear and even myself utter. And a good pa amb oli is a treat. There again, I'm not a tourist. Yet, Montserrat's description could, if you took out the all-inclusive setting, apply just as easily to the British expatriate. Or to one particular type. Possibly.
The fact that Montserrat was talking about a telly programme is pertinent to the debate caused by Sky satellites crashing to earth and leaving huge craters into which the expatriate community plunges as though into voids of cultural deprivation. I know there are no satellites falling to earth, but you could be forgiven for thinking that there were. Potential loss of the signal has heralded an expatriate tragedy of Shakespearean proportions. Without the telly, "oh, woe is me, t'have seen what I have seen, see what I see" but can no longer.
I suspect that many expatriates and not, it is probably fair to say, only British adopt a pick 'n' mix policy to their lives in Mallorca. They will pick some of the indigenous and some of the old country. And in so doing, they will be content. Until, that is, someone pipes up and commands them to abandon Sky forthwith and to go native, just like that someone has. This someone is the most insufferable of all expatriates -the holier-than-thou, converse normally only in Mallorquín, and let everyone know the fact expat.
While Montserrat's description of the British tourist - itself of course a gross generalisation - could equally apply to the expatriate, it would be to a species of "expatriatus in extremis". Granted, it does seem odd to stumble across such a rare species who has long planted Mallorcan roots but who is still incapable of doing the lingo to any greater extent than "dos cervezas, por favor", but why should it matter?
The pressure to make someone have to try and justify the degree of his or her integration (whatever this word means, because I really don't know that a satisfactory definition exists) is preposterous. Watching British telly is evidence of nothing other than watching British telly, but for some it is evidence of the existence of bad expat or good expat. Rubbish. It would be an extreme measure for someone to decide to pack up and "go back home" because Sky falls, but the fact that Sky, telly and various other forms of communication became so easily available is, I think it fair to argue, a reason (only one reason) why some people chose to come to Mallorca to live.
The communications industry in its different varieties can indeed make it appear as though the expatriate has moulded a style of life which is little Britain in the sun, but that isn't the fault of the expatriate. He or she is symptomatic of a cultural hybridism that has been facilitated through freedom of movement and fibre optics. And if he or she wants to watch British telly, then so be it.
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
José Ramón Bauzá: The Interview
The Spanish television channel La Sexta first really came onto my radar during the 2006 World Cup. It was the home to the late Andrés Montes, the commentator attributed with having coined the expression "tiki-taka", and his two fellow commentators who together had the unnerving habit of singing during matches. La Sexta is, therefore, forever etched in my mind as the channel of the Three Tenor commentators, a channel of levity, one not to be taken that seriously. However, it has become a channel with more gravitas. It was La Sexta which took an in-depth look at the charmers who were the German Hell's Angels and at their organised criminality that had become centred on Mallorca. Now, it has given us José Ramón Bauzá: The Interview.
There is something distinctly odd going on with Bauzá at present. He is behaving as though he were a president. Not of a collection of small islands in the Mediterranean but of somewhere rather grander. He has been whizzing off here, whizzing off there, and it hasn't gone unnoticed. Why hasn't he been stuck behind his desk in Palma attending to domestic affairs rather than gadding off to the USA, South America and goodness knows where else? He's off to Brussels this week and at the weekend he was in Madrid for The Interview.
Going on La Sexta might, by comparison with Bauzá the statesman in foreign lands, seem relatively unimportant, but it was in fact quite the opposite. This is a president like others, notably his dear leader Rajoy, who don't as a rule do things such as give big interviews on national television. They prefer to keep mum, which in Rajoy's case is normally wise. Bauzá might have put in the odd appearance on Mallorca's IB3, but he wouldn't have expected there to be any awkward moments. Not when the channel is firmly under the control of his party. La Sexta is a different matter entirely. So, he should be commended, but the question is, what's he up to? Or where might he be heading?
The answers might be nothing and nowhere, but the sudden emergence of dynamic, man-about-the-international scene Bauzá inevitably leads some to suggest that he is being measured up for a suit with more than just a Mallorcan style. Why else would the nation wish to hear from a president of some islands which can scrape together only a fraction more than a million people, located some fair old distance from the Valencian coastline and known by most Spaniards, as by mostly everyone else, as places to spend their summer jollies?
Of course, certain things have been happening in the Balearics which could be said to be of some national interest, not least the whole teaching carry-on, and it was this - trilingual education, the teachers' strike, etc. - which was a key item on the agenda for The Interview. It is perhaps a shame that a subservient media in Mallorca wouldn't subject Bauzá to a grilling, even if he were to let it, and that the consequent communication weren't little more than press release propaganda, but then Mallorca and the Balearics are only Mallorca and the Balearics. They are not of national importance to the ambitious politician.
So, what did he have to say in The Interview? Some of it was, it must be said, perfectly reasonable. "Politics and indoctrination must be kept out of the classroom." Amen. A concern of mine regarding the teachers' strike and issues related to TIL is that it potentially radicalises schoolchildren. But then, who was it who started the politics? For Bauzá it was clear. "Behind the strike were the unions, PSOE and nationalists (i.e. Mallorcan/Balearics nationalists) who manipulated parents." These parents were among the thousands who demonstrated against TIL at the end of September. Bauzá offered his "maximum respect" to the protests but he went on to say that "the parents did not have all the information", such as the fact that TIL supposedly meant only a couple of hours more of English per week.
He was implying that parents had been misled or misinformed but what he wasn't saying was the regional government made such a pig's ear of communicating effectively with the public over TIL. Rather like teachers and unions had several months to get used to the idea of TIL and prepare for it, so the government had several months to prepare the public for its introduction and to explain it properly. It didn't.
Leaving time to put in a good word for Aina Calvo as the new leader of PSOE in the Balearics (because she would be inclined not to scrap TIL were she to be leader and president of the islands), The Interview came to an end, the nation now familiar with the man who would be. Would be what? Was that what it was all about?
There is something distinctly odd going on with Bauzá at present. He is behaving as though he were a president. Not of a collection of small islands in the Mediterranean but of somewhere rather grander. He has been whizzing off here, whizzing off there, and it hasn't gone unnoticed. Why hasn't he been stuck behind his desk in Palma attending to domestic affairs rather than gadding off to the USA, South America and goodness knows where else? He's off to Brussels this week and at the weekend he was in Madrid for The Interview.
Going on La Sexta might, by comparison with Bauzá the statesman in foreign lands, seem relatively unimportant, but it was in fact quite the opposite. This is a president like others, notably his dear leader Rajoy, who don't as a rule do things such as give big interviews on national television. They prefer to keep mum, which in Rajoy's case is normally wise. Bauzá might have put in the odd appearance on Mallorca's IB3, but he wouldn't have expected there to be any awkward moments. Not when the channel is firmly under the control of his party. La Sexta is a different matter entirely. So, he should be commended, but the question is, what's he up to? Or where might he be heading?
The answers might be nothing and nowhere, but the sudden emergence of dynamic, man-about-the-international scene Bauzá inevitably leads some to suggest that he is being measured up for a suit with more than just a Mallorcan style. Why else would the nation wish to hear from a president of some islands which can scrape together only a fraction more than a million people, located some fair old distance from the Valencian coastline and known by most Spaniards, as by mostly everyone else, as places to spend their summer jollies?
Of course, certain things have been happening in the Balearics which could be said to be of some national interest, not least the whole teaching carry-on, and it was this - trilingual education, the teachers' strike, etc. - which was a key item on the agenda for The Interview. It is perhaps a shame that a subservient media in Mallorca wouldn't subject Bauzá to a grilling, even if he were to let it, and that the consequent communication weren't little more than press release propaganda, but then Mallorca and the Balearics are only Mallorca and the Balearics. They are not of national importance to the ambitious politician.
So, what did he have to say in The Interview? Some of it was, it must be said, perfectly reasonable. "Politics and indoctrination must be kept out of the classroom." Amen. A concern of mine regarding the teachers' strike and issues related to TIL is that it potentially radicalises schoolchildren. But then, who was it who started the politics? For Bauzá it was clear. "Behind the strike were the unions, PSOE and nationalists (i.e. Mallorcan/Balearics nationalists) who manipulated parents." These parents were among the thousands who demonstrated against TIL at the end of September. Bauzá offered his "maximum respect" to the protests but he went on to say that "the parents did not have all the information", such as the fact that TIL supposedly meant only a couple of hours more of English per week.
He was implying that parents had been misled or misinformed but what he wasn't saying was the regional government made such a pig's ear of communicating effectively with the public over TIL. Rather like teachers and unions had several months to get used to the idea of TIL and prepare for it, so the government had several months to prepare the public for its introduction and to explain it properly. It didn't.
Leaving time to put in a good word for Aina Calvo as the new leader of PSOE in the Balearics (because she would be inclined not to scrap TIL were she to be leader and president of the islands), The Interview came to an end, the nation now familiar with the man who would be. Would be what? Was that what it was all about?
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Doctor Quién?: A Spanish Time Lord
The fiftieth anniversary of Doctor Who, you might be surprised to learn, has been generating a degree of interest in Spain. The newspaper "El País", for example, has been devoting space to the anniversary and has issued fifty tweets with links to various episodes featuring the different Doctors. It does, though, have to do a bit of explaining. In one article it says that "Doctor Who es un viajero en el tiempo". This begs a question, therefore, as to how well known Doctor Who is in Spain. An answer, according to one commentator in the paper, is not very well. Though Doctor Who has been highly popular in many countries, in Spain it does not seem to have provoked "una gran repercusión".
This isn't that surprising. Though the first Peter Cushing film - "Doctor Who y los Daleks" - was released in Spain in 1967, it wasn't until 1988 that the television programme was broadcast and only shown between 1988 and 1991 on four regional channels in Galicia, Catalonia, Andalusia and Madrid. The episodes were all from the Tom Baker years.
News of the first broadcasts in Catalonia received coverage in the newspaper "ABC". "Doctor Who is a curious person belonging to a superior race of time lords. The Doctor travels across time on board the "Tradis", a spaceship in the form of an English telephone cabin." Well, maybe "Tradis" was a typo, while going into detail as to the exact nature of the telephone cabin was probably unnecessary. The article went on to explain that the fourth Doctor, Tom Baker, had set out to make his interpretation of the Doctor one that was a parody of Harpo Marx. Baker was always the best Doctor, in my opinion, and he invented a manic Doctor, but Harpo Marx? Maybe it was. The comparison has also been made by a Doctor Who historian, but I confess it never occurred to me.
Doctor Who's popularity worldwide was such that by the time the first episodes were bought by Spain, the series had been sold to some 60 countries. Many years before those first Spanish episodes, it had been bought by three Spanish-speaking countries - Venezuela, Mexico and Chile - at the back end of the 1960s. It seems a bit odd that it should have taken so long for sales to be made in Spain, though maybe not. France and Germany only started buying in 1989. Nevertheless, the Doctor was well known in many parts of Central and South America by the time that Spain got in on the act, and in Spanish parts of the American continent he was typically known not as Doctor Who but Dr. Misterio. He was never, by the way, Doctor Quién.
Otherwise, names tended not to be changed. The Daleks were "los Daleks", Morbius was "Morbius", but the Cybermen posed a slight difficulty. They became "los Hombres Ciberneticos".
The mounting excitement ahead of the anniversary is because of the special with Matt Smith and David Tennant that is to be broadcast on Saturday, and there is no lack of excitement among Spanish aficionados. "The Day of the Doctor" is to be broadcast simultaneously in several countries, but it won't be in Spain. It will also be shown in 3D in cinemas in different countries, and it seems that pressure from bloggers and fans has meant that the Cinesa cinema chain will show it, but only on a limited basis. It will be shown on the Spanish Syfy satellite channel some time in February, by which time any real fanatic will doubtless have found some way of seeing it. The best advice is probably to find some nice local Brits who have the BBC and go watch it round their place.
So, the fiftieth anniversary is likely to be somewhat muted in Spain. Whether Doctor Who represents anything more than an obsession among a very small band of fans in Spain is hard to say; a Facebook page for Doctor Who España only has some 900 likes. Still, parts of the Spanish press think it's a significant anniversary, and indeed it is.
* I acknowledge the wiki website www.broadwcast.org for information here.
Tuesday, November 12, 2013
Time To Turn Off The TV?: IB3
In the Balearics, there were protests two years ago when the decision was taken to close TV Mallorca. There were similar objections to those now being made in Valencia. Among them were claims that Mallorca's audiovisual industry would be hit hard and that some 2,000 employees could find themselves at risk of losing their jobs. The final transmission was in December 2011 and a year later a further decision by the Council of Mallorca, which had been the body that had closed TV Mallorca, was greeted as representing a potentially fatal blow to the local AV industry; this was the decision to close the Mallorca Film Commission.
The AV industry also criticised cuts to budgets at IB3, the other Mallorca government-funded broadcaster. When these cuts were added to the closure of TV Mallorca and of the film commission, they together amounted to a major threat to an industry which, in no small part, has been at the forefront of a drive towards a stronger technology-based economy on the island.
While lack of funding has been used as the justification for closure, there has also been a heavy dose of politics. TV Mallorca, a company created by the then Unió Mallorquina-led Council of Mallorca, received backing from organisations such as GOB, the environmental group, and the OCB, the promoters of Catalan culture, when the by now Partido Popular-led Council took its decision to close the station. IB3, in the meantime, has become a broadcaster firmly under the control of the PP. The likes of GOB, so it has been alleged, are all but barred, while there was criticism of IB3's lack of coverage of the massive demonstration against the regional government's trilingual teaching policy.
Against a background of an inference that IB3 is being used as a government mouthpiece, there now comes a revelation as to quite how much IB3 has been costing. Since it was launched by the Jaume Matas PP government in 2005, it is said to have cost 650 million euros. Though its budget has been cut over the past four years, in 2012 it still received funding of almost 45 million euros (roughly speaking, public funds amount to 95% of its operating revenue). Based on the cost per head of population, IB3 is the second most expensive regional broadcaster in Spain.
The 2012 budget did, however, have to be supplemented. Had it not been, IB3 might have been forced to shut down. And it would appear that ever since its launch, the initial annual budgets have always been supplemented, occasionally in an astronomical fashion. Meantime, the total of 650 million euros has contributed to sustaining a broadcaster which attracts slightly less than 6% of audience share. By comparison, for example, TV3 in Catalonia has a 13.6% audience share, one pulled from a vastly greater population. Valencia's Channel 9 (RTVV) has a lower share, but it also has a larger population to draw on.
Local broadcasting should, in theory, be a "good thing". It is a very good thing if the funds it receives from government and taxpayers then translate into new businesses, more jobs and technological innovation. It is also a very good thing if it advances local culture and is a force for social good. But it is not a very good thing if it is viewed by comparatively small audiences, costs a fortune and becomes a political tool. If IB3 were to close tomorrow, few people, other than those whose jobs depend on it, would do much weeping.
IB3 has also been dogged with suspicions. Those to do with some of that funding. Little more than three years into its existence, the police had started to snoop around, asking questions about payments for studio sets which were some 20% higher than tenders from companies which had missed out.
The regional government, aware of the protests in Valencia, has said that it has no intention of following Valencia's lead in closing IB3. There again, if it is serving a useful purpose for the government, then why would it? And why would it privatise IB3, as has been suggested, if privatisation meant broadcaster independence? But then who would want to buy it? 6% audience share? No thanks.
Monday, April 22, 2013
Living In A Box: TV and culture
Top of the Pops, Thunderbirds, The Prisoner, Monty Python's Flying Circus, Grange Hill, The Young Ones, Neighbours, The Simpsons, Men Behaving Badly, Teletubbies, Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?, Big Brother, The Office. I think that's all. Over time they have all been referred to, either directly or indirectly, in articles I have written. They are also all on a list of the most influential TV programmes of the past 50 years. According to "The Telegraph", that is.
I make no apologies for invoking the British popular culture of television. I may write mostly about Mallorca and Spain, but what would be the point of drawing on Spanish TV in order to try and create a point of reference or a touchstone? No one, or very few people, would get it. By contrast, and even if it is done obliquely, a collective Britannic cultural experience recognises Kylie as a default title for a young(ish) British female tourist. Time was when baby girls in Britain were mostly all christened Kylie. And if not, then they were Charlene, and Charlene was, after all, Kylie by another name. My Kylies are to be found wheeling their Rihanna progeny in buggies along Alcúdia's Mile.
Even if I wander into less obviously Spanish-Mallorcan territory or totally non-Spanish-Mallorcan territory, as I once long ago did when considering modes of speech, there is still this reservoir of culture to feed off and allude to. I was deeply impressed by Rory McGrath having coined the term the "moronic interrogative". What did it refer to? Neighbours. It was Neighbours that changed the way the British speak.
It is perhaps for this reason that "The Telegraph" has included Neighbours on its list. Or perhaps it is because the series became such an indispensable and ingrained part of British culture. This is the point of cultural references. The use of Kylie shouldn't require an explanation as to its pre-Stock, Aitken and Waterman origin. Nor should the source of Eric Idle's Torremolinos sketch or the Inquisitional "Biggles, put her in the comfy chair" need to be spelt out. Nor should a demand such as "we want information" and a reply of "you won't get it" have to be located. These are references that reside in the enormous repository of a nation's cultural memory, one that has been programmed by the telly programme.
Doubtless one could find an alternative programme for each of the 50 years, but as a history of cultural development, it has much to commend it. There will be those who look at some of the programmes and think that it is an exercise in trivialisation or dumbing down. Maybe so, but then popular culture often is trivial; just think of X Factor (which doesn't make the list) or Pop Idol (which does).
If I had to choose two programmes that aren't among the fifty, then they might be the BBC's Holiday and ITV's Tiswas. Holiday opened up foreign travel in a way that no other part of the media had previously. Was it culturally important? I would say that it most definitely was. Grange Hill, the selection for 1978, in a sense ties in with Tiswas, which took off nationally around the same time. Grange Hill was a first in that it took children seriously and tackled serious subjects that affected children. Tiswas was most definitely not serious, but it represented a marked change in adult-child interaction. It was really a cult show for lads and ladettes (the first of its kind therefore), masquerading as a kids' programme, but kids loved its barriers-down irreverence as much as adults did. No show for children would previously have dared to have Chris Tarrant more than slightly hinting at the size of his hangover and lifting kids up by their ears, to have John Gorman (or was it Lenny Henry?) chastising a boy scout for being a "swot" or to have Sally James firmly putting her foot in it by asking Kevin Rowland the meaning of the name Dexys Midnight Runners.
More than anything, these programmes travel with you. However long you might have been away from the homeland of the culture, they are revered symbols of an abstract cultural iconography that is always there, one to be delved into in order to make sense of a pair of lads in Mallorca out on the razz and the pull (Gary and Tony), a total div who you are unfortunate enough to run into (David Brent), or that ageing hippy who raves about lentils in local Mallorcan cuisine (Neil).
And if you don't immediately know to which programmes these characters refer, well, what do you call culture then?
* http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/tvandradio/10002180/The-Telegraphs-most-influential-TV-shows-of-the-last-50-years.html
A classic Tiswas moment (the boy who needed to go to the toilet):
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
I make no apologies for invoking the British popular culture of television. I may write mostly about Mallorca and Spain, but what would be the point of drawing on Spanish TV in order to try and create a point of reference or a touchstone? No one, or very few people, would get it. By contrast, and even if it is done obliquely, a collective Britannic cultural experience recognises Kylie as a default title for a young(ish) British female tourist. Time was when baby girls in Britain were mostly all christened Kylie. And if not, then they were Charlene, and Charlene was, after all, Kylie by another name. My Kylies are to be found wheeling their Rihanna progeny in buggies along Alcúdia's Mile.
Even if I wander into less obviously Spanish-Mallorcan territory or totally non-Spanish-Mallorcan territory, as I once long ago did when considering modes of speech, there is still this reservoir of culture to feed off and allude to. I was deeply impressed by Rory McGrath having coined the term the "moronic interrogative". What did it refer to? Neighbours. It was Neighbours that changed the way the British speak.
It is perhaps for this reason that "The Telegraph" has included Neighbours on its list. Or perhaps it is because the series became such an indispensable and ingrained part of British culture. This is the point of cultural references. The use of Kylie shouldn't require an explanation as to its pre-Stock, Aitken and Waterman origin. Nor should the source of Eric Idle's Torremolinos sketch or the Inquisitional "Biggles, put her in the comfy chair" need to be spelt out. Nor should a demand such as "we want information" and a reply of "you won't get it" have to be located. These are references that reside in the enormous repository of a nation's cultural memory, one that has been programmed by the telly programme.
Doubtless one could find an alternative programme for each of the 50 years, but as a history of cultural development, it has much to commend it. There will be those who look at some of the programmes and think that it is an exercise in trivialisation or dumbing down. Maybe so, but then popular culture often is trivial; just think of X Factor (which doesn't make the list) or Pop Idol (which does).
If I had to choose two programmes that aren't among the fifty, then they might be the BBC's Holiday and ITV's Tiswas. Holiday opened up foreign travel in a way that no other part of the media had previously. Was it culturally important? I would say that it most definitely was. Grange Hill, the selection for 1978, in a sense ties in with Tiswas, which took off nationally around the same time. Grange Hill was a first in that it took children seriously and tackled serious subjects that affected children. Tiswas was most definitely not serious, but it represented a marked change in adult-child interaction. It was really a cult show for lads and ladettes (the first of its kind therefore), masquerading as a kids' programme, but kids loved its barriers-down irreverence as much as adults did. No show for children would previously have dared to have Chris Tarrant more than slightly hinting at the size of his hangover and lifting kids up by their ears, to have John Gorman (or was it Lenny Henry?) chastising a boy scout for being a "swot" or to have Sally James firmly putting her foot in it by asking Kevin Rowland the meaning of the name Dexys Midnight Runners.
More than anything, these programmes travel with you. However long you might have been away from the homeland of the culture, they are revered symbols of an abstract cultural iconography that is always there, one to be delved into in order to make sense of a pair of lads in Mallorca out on the razz and the pull (Gary and Tony), a total div who you are unfortunate enough to run into (David Brent), or that ageing hippy who raves about lentils in local Mallorcan cuisine (Neil).
And if you don't immediately know to which programmes these characters refer, well, what do you call culture then?
* http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/tvandradio/10002180/The-Telegraphs-most-influential-TV-shows-of-the-last-50-years.html
A classic Tiswas moment (the boy who needed to go to the toilet):
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
The Manipulation Game: Spanish broadcasting
In 1968, Tony Benn launched an attack on the BBC and gave us a memorable quote. "Broadcasting is really too important to be left to the broadcaster." Benn went on to call for the establishment of "representative broadcasting" instead of that controlled by the "constitutional monarchs" at the BBC.
What Benn was referring to has long been and in truth always has been behind the media's conduct, namely the wielding of influence over the output. Arguably, there is no such thing as true freedom of the press (or wider media) and never can be. To offer another quote, that by A.J.Liebling, an American journalist who died 50 years ago: "freedom of the press is guaranteed only to those who own one". Even then, the freedom is subject to influence.
Interference, ideology, bias all collide in massaging the message, with influence bordering on being synonymous with interference and determining the ideology or bias. Yet, is this influence as strong as it once was? When Tony Benn was making his speech, communications media were limited. The internet has changed the rules of the game and has made the more overt use of influence in manipulating the messages of the conventional media subject to far greater scrutiny and potential ridicule.
Theoretically, the democratisation of information that has been enabled by the internet exposes the ways in which influence is brought to bear. This hasn't stopped the peddling of influence or the degree of interference, but because of the existence of a present-day media-savvy, cyber-connected public and bloggerati, this influence is shown up for what it is, to the extent that one wonders whether some of those who seek to wield influence really understand what world they are living in.
In Spain, there are some troubling examples of seeking to influence and of outright interference. They are so obvious that one is left to conclude that certain politicians are either ignorant of the changed rules or are perfectly well aware of them but choose to thumb their noses at them in acts of craven disregard.
The interference at the national broadcaster, RTVE, has already been chronicled. It has manifested itself in the sidelining of certain journalists and in the downgrading of importance attached to specific news items; these journalists and news items not being to the liking of the government. Last weekend, the Partido Popular government attempted to interfere with what was entitled "The Great Debate" on Telecinco. The debate was to be about the scandal that has erupted regarding the party's former treasurer. During the programme's broadcast, a text message was sent by the PP which made it clear that it was threatening to sue.
In effect, the party was looking to stifle the great debate, yet seemingly nothing that Telecinco raised wasn't already in the public domain. Crucially though, the scandal is massively important; it required debating, not neutering.
Once upon a time and under a former regime, such a debate couldn't have occurred and the public wouldn't have been aware of any alleged or actual corruption. The PP seems to be living in the past not just because it lumbered in with its heavy, censorious boots but also because it neglected the scrutinising other world of the media on the internet. It might want to take on the conventional media, but it only succeeds in web-viralising its actions.
If the PP nationally is engaged in overt attempts to influence or interfere, its regional wing in the Balearics is acting in an even more overt fashion. President Bauzá, likened by opposition parties to Berlusconi because of his rewriting of the law on political transparency, is taking the comparison further by acting like Berlusconi in controlling a television station. Or so it is being alleged. The charge has been made that the public IB3 channel is being manipulated by the director of Bauzá's cabinet, Javier Fons.
It has been suggested that certain organisations are in effect banned from IB3, and Fons has been vetoing the appearance of some individuals. He had previously prohibited one particular journalist from being involved in an interview. He is also said to have interfered with an interview with the president of the Fundación Kovacs, a research organisation that has clinics for the treatment of neck and back complaints. A grant of a million euros was one topic for the interview. President Bauzá is on the foundation's board.
Broadcasting may indeed be too important to be left to broadcasters. Faults they may have, influence they may be unable or unwilling to reject, but broadcasting is too important to be left to politicians in whose hands it becomes undemocratic. The PP would do well to understand this.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
What Benn was referring to has long been and in truth always has been behind the media's conduct, namely the wielding of influence over the output. Arguably, there is no such thing as true freedom of the press (or wider media) and never can be. To offer another quote, that by A.J.Liebling, an American journalist who died 50 years ago: "freedom of the press is guaranteed only to those who own one". Even then, the freedom is subject to influence.
Interference, ideology, bias all collide in massaging the message, with influence bordering on being synonymous with interference and determining the ideology or bias. Yet, is this influence as strong as it once was? When Tony Benn was making his speech, communications media were limited. The internet has changed the rules of the game and has made the more overt use of influence in manipulating the messages of the conventional media subject to far greater scrutiny and potential ridicule.
Theoretically, the democratisation of information that has been enabled by the internet exposes the ways in which influence is brought to bear. This hasn't stopped the peddling of influence or the degree of interference, but because of the existence of a present-day media-savvy, cyber-connected public and bloggerati, this influence is shown up for what it is, to the extent that one wonders whether some of those who seek to wield influence really understand what world they are living in.
In Spain, there are some troubling examples of seeking to influence and of outright interference. They are so obvious that one is left to conclude that certain politicians are either ignorant of the changed rules or are perfectly well aware of them but choose to thumb their noses at them in acts of craven disregard.
The interference at the national broadcaster, RTVE, has already been chronicled. It has manifested itself in the sidelining of certain journalists and in the downgrading of importance attached to specific news items; these journalists and news items not being to the liking of the government. Last weekend, the Partido Popular government attempted to interfere with what was entitled "The Great Debate" on Telecinco. The debate was to be about the scandal that has erupted regarding the party's former treasurer. During the programme's broadcast, a text message was sent by the PP which made it clear that it was threatening to sue.
In effect, the party was looking to stifle the great debate, yet seemingly nothing that Telecinco raised wasn't already in the public domain. Crucially though, the scandal is massively important; it required debating, not neutering.
Once upon a time and under a former regime, such a debate couldn't have occurred and the public wouldn't have been aware of any alleged or actual corruption. The PP seems to be living in the past not just because it lumbered in with its heavy, censorious boots but also because it neglected the scrutinising other world of the media on the internet. It might want to take on the conventional media, but it only succeeds in web-viralising its actions.
If the PP nationally is engaged in overt attempts to influence or interfere, its regional wing in the Balearics is acting in an even more overt fashion. President Bauzá, likened by opposition parties to Berlusconi because of his rewriting of the law on political transparency, is taking the comparison further by acting like Berlusconi in controlling a television station. Or so it is being alleged. The charge has been made that the public IB3 channel is being manipulated by the director of Bauzá's cabinet, Javier Fons.
It has been suggested that certain organisations are in effect banned from IB3, and Fons has been vetoing the appearance of some individuals. He had previously prohibited one particular journalist from being involved in an interview. He is also said to have interfered with an interview with the president of the Fundación Kovacs, a research organisation that has clinics for the treatment of neck and back complaints. A grant of a million euros was one topic for the interview. President Bauzá is on the foundation's board.
Broadcasting may indeed be too important to be left to broadcasters. Faults they may have, influence they may be unable or unwilling to reject, but broadcasting is too important to be left to politicians in whose hands it becomes undemocratic. The PP would do well to understand this.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Needling The Spanish: French sporting satire
Sport has long had the capacity to stir up diplomatic unrest. Douglas Jardine's insistence that Larwood and Voce deployed leg theory on the MCC's Ashes Bodyline tour in the early 1930s threatened the relationship between Britain and Australia. This, though, was a purely sporting (or unsporting, were you Australian) incident. The spat between France and Spain is well removed from a sports arena; it is being played out on television.
There has been some needle, so to speak, between the French and the Spanish in the matter of Rafael Nadal. It was spiked by the utterances of Nadal's trainer-uncle, Toni, when he once referred to Parisians as stupid for having supported Roger Federer more than the Muscle of Manacor, and then by the director of Spanish tourism in Paris who not only agreed with Uncle Toni but went on to suggest that the Paris public had no style. (And they wonder why French tourism numbers to Mallorca have remained static since the turn of the century.)
Now it is the turn of the French and in particular the satirical puppet show, "Les Guignols de l'info", to have a go at Nadal. And the Real Madrid and Spanish national team's goalkeeper, Iker Casillas. And the cyclist Alberto Contador. It all comes on the back of former French tennis star Yannick Noah's insinuation that Spanish sport was so far removed from being clean that pretty much all Spanish sportspeople were doping.
Allegations that Nadal may have acquired his physique in ways other than just naturally are nothing new. But there has never been any proof. They are allegations, and though Nadal has sought to brush off the satire directed at him (e.g. using a syringe to write a letter of support to Contador, banned for two years for doping), the Spanish Tennis Federation has said that it is considering suing the show's broadcaster, Canal Plus. It would have a justifiable case in doing so. It may be satire, but it could just as easily be described as defamation.
The spat between Spain and France over the show has now embraced all manner of politicians. The Spanish Ambassador in Paris has been in touch with Canal Plus; the French sports minister has received a letter from the Spanish sports council; the leader of PSOE, Alfredo Rubalcaba, has had his say; and the Partido Popular in the Balearics is presenting a parliamentary motion condemning the "parodies of Spanish sportspeople", one that the opposition parties have criticised, saying that the PP should be worrying more about unemployment.
What kicked it all off was Contador's ban for doping during the 2010 Tour de France. If the 2010 Tour had been the only time that Contador had found himself embroiled in a doping controversy, the French might not have decided it was high time that some satire was directed at him and Spanish sport in general. But it wasn't the only time.
A problem for the Spanish, in defending themselves against the jibes, is that there has been equivocation by sporting authorities and that there has been political influence. The Spanish Cycling Federation was close to giving Contador a one-year ban before former prime minister Zapatero voiced his support for Contador and the federation accepted the defence of meat contamination, which ultimately led the World Anti-Doping Agency to take the matter to the Court of Arbitration for Sport and to the two-year ban (which in practice will finish in August this year).
Nevertheless, the satirical attacks by Canal Plus and Noah's accusations have caused rightful indignation. As always, in understanding why there is indignation, it is appropriate to consider the reaction were the boot on the other foot, i.e. were the French on the receiving end of doping accusations from Spanish sources.
Nadal does come out of all this pretty well. He has played it down as an attempt at humour, but one that may have gone too far. Whether, however, the Canal Plus show was the catalyst is not clear, but Nadal was subject to a surprise, recent dope test.
In accepting that, rather being personal, the French attacks are aimed at Spanish sport in general, Nadal is aligning himself with the politicians, one of whom, the foreign minister no less, has pointed out that in 2011 there were 62 more cases of doping in France than there were in Spain. Touché. Meanwhile, however, and the political fall-out notwithstanding, the Spanish sport minister has said that there will soon be a new anti-doping law. This may or may not have been planned, but it will now seem timely, and no doubt the French will take the credit.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
There has been some needle, so to speak, between the French and the Spanish in the matter of Rafael Nadal. It was spiked by the utterances of Nadal's trainer-uncle, Toni, when he once referred to Parisians as stupid for having supported Roger Federer more than the Muscle of Manacor, and then by the director of Spanish tourism in Paris who not only agreed with Uncle Toni but went on to suggest that the Paris public had no style. (And they wonder why French tourism numbers to Mallorca have remained static since the turn of the century.)
Now it is the turn of the French and in particular the satirical puppet show, "Les Guignols de l'info", to have a go at Nadal. And the Real Madrid and Spanish national team's goalkeeper, Iker Casillas. And the cyclist Alberto Contador. It all comes on the back of former French tennis star Yannick Noah's insinuation that Spanish sport was so far removed from being clean that pretty much all Spanish sportspeople were doping.
Allegations that Nadal may have acquired his physique in ways other than just naturally are nothing new. But there has never been any proof. They are allegations, and though Nadal has sought to brush off the satire directed at him (e.g. using a syringe to write a letter of support to Contador, banned for two years for doping), the Spanish Tennis Federation has said that it is considering suing the show's broadcaster, Canal Plus. It would have a justifiable case in doing so. It may be satire, but it could just as easily be described as defamation.
The spat between Spain and France over the show has now embraced all manner of politicians. The Spanish Ambassador in Paris has been in touch with Canal Plus; the French sports minister has received a letter from the Spanish sports council; the leader of PSOE, Alfredo Rubalcaba, has had his say; and the Partido Popular in the Balearics is presenting a parliamentary motion condemning the "parodies of Spanish sportspeople", one that the opposition parties have criticised, saying that the PP should be worrying more about unemployment.
What kicked it all off was Contador's ban for doping during the 2010 Tour de France. If the 2010 Tour had been the only time that Contador had found himself embroiled in a doping controversy, the French might not have decided it was high time that some satire was directed at him and Spanish sport in general. But it wasn't the only time.
A problem for the Spanish, in defending themselves against the jibes, is that there has been equivocation by sporting authorities and that there has been political influence. The Spanish Cycling Federation was close to giving Contador a one-year ban before former prime minister Zapatero voiced his support for Contador and the federation accepted the defence of meat contamination, which ultimately led the World Anti-Doping Agency to take the matter to the Court of Arbitration for Sport and to the two-year ban (which in practice will finish in August this year).
Nevertheless, the satirical attacks by Canal Plus and Noah's accusations have caused rightful indignation. As always, in understanding why there is indignation, it is appropriate to consider the reaction were the boot on the other foot, i.e. were the French on the receiving end of doping accusations from Spanish sources.
Nadal does come out of all this pretty well. He has played it down as an attempt at humour, but one that may have gone too far. Whether, however, the Canal Plus show was the catalyst is not clear, but Nadal was subject to a surprise, recent dope test.
In accepting that, rather being personal, the French attacks are aimed at Spanish sport in general, Nadal is aligning himself with the politicians, one of whom, the foreign minister no less, has pointed out that in 2011 there were 62 more cases of doping in France than there were in Spain. Touché. Meanwhile, however, and the political fall-out notwithstanding, the Spanish sport minister has said that there will soon be a new anti-doping law. This may or may not have been planned, but it will now seem timely, and no doubt the French will take the credit.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Bingo! There's no uncertainty
A listener to "Test Match Special" last year came up with the idea for a game called "Boycott Bingo". This entails calling out "bingo" every time the great man - Sir Geoffrey - utters one of his regular and predictable clichés, e.g. "corridor of uncertainty", "we used to play on uncovered wickets" or "my mum would have caught that in her pinny".
Mallorca has its own version of Boycott Bingo in that bingo illegality crops up as regularly and as predictably as the Great Yorkshireman states that his gran could have "hit that with a stick of rhubarb". One moment it's outdoor games at fiestas being banned because minors are in attendance - bingo!; the next it's some old dears having their games interrupted by the sound of heavy boots - bingo!; then it's a hotel being raided because it's conducting games that it shouldn't be - bingo!
When day centres for the elderly were being raided by plod who suspected - correctly - that the oldsters were up to no good in playing bingo for which there was no licence, all manner of indignation was released. How insensitive. Why stop a little bit of pleasure for the old folk? It was accepted that perhaps it had been a bit heavy-handed. However, it turned out that behind certainly one of the illicit bingo games was something a bit fishy that proved worthy of further investigation.
There is no real uncertainty regarding the playing of bingo. You need a licence. The absence of one may have something to do with plod having pounded down the corridors of a hotel in Sa Coma to put a stop to its bingo. I could always tell you which hotel, but I won't, because it's not been reported elsewhere, so I'd rather not say. But rest assured, keep checking Sa Coma hotels on "Trip Advisor" and there will doubtless be some entry referring to a bingo raid. "I was just about to call 'house', and this policeman took my card away. I shall be complaining to the tour operator."
One difference between the relatively small cerveza of the old folks' day centre bingo games and those in the hotel has to do with the amount of money the latter raise. Two and seven? Twenty-seven. Twenty-seven thousand euros. A month.
If you were to go and look on "Trip Advisor" and choose a hotel on Mallorca, you might well find mention of bingo among the entertainment on offer. Most hotels have games. And are they all correctly licensed? I couldn't begin to answer that question. But the two bingo associations - AESBI and ASBA - have been making repeated representations to relevant authorities regarding the need to "eradicate the large number of illegal bingo games that proliferate" on Mallorca and the other islands.
A couple of days before the raid in Sa Coma, the two associations had in fact presented a proposal for the establishment of electronic bingo terminals in hotels as part of their drive to stamp out illegal games. The proposal may well be greeted favourably, as a "win" would involve a ten per cent tax finding its way into the coffers of the Hacienda.
It will be instructive to see how this all pans out, as Mallorca's hotels, anticipating the likely change of national government, are putting together various proposals of a legal nature for the new Partido Popular administration to chew over.
One of these is to do with the law on intellectual property. This has an impact on the "complementary offer" of entertainment in its widest sense within hotels (of which, incidentally, the electronic bingo terminals would be a new addition, say the bingo associations). It doesn't have to do solely with any rights from musical performances. It also covers television.
Decisions by both the European Court of Justice and the Spanish Supreme Court have led to interpretations that television broadcasts in hotel rooms constitute "public communication" and are therefore liable to rights payments. This is because, for the most part, a cable or satellite signal is re-transmitted by the hotel to the rooms. Were signals to go directly to the rooms (far more costly to set up), then the communication would be private, meaning no broadcast rights payments.
On these two matters, the bingo and the broadcasting, I am with the bingo associations and the police but not with the public communication interpretation; charges are probably passed on for what is made public but is consumed in private. As for bingo, though it is harmless fun, it is fair to ask what actually happens to money that is raised. There is no uncertainty, or shouldn't be. Gaming is either licensed or it isn't.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Mallorca has its own version of Boycott Bingo in that bingo illegality crops up as regularly and as predictably as the Great Yorkshireman states that his gran could have "hit that with a stick of rhubarb". One moment it's outdoor games at fiestas being banned because minors are in attendance - bingo!; the next it's some old dears having their games interrupted by the sound of heavy boots - bingo!; then it's a hotel being raided because it's conducting games that it shouldn't be - bingo!
When day centres for the elderly were being raided by plod who suspected - correctly - that the oldsters were up to no good in playing bingo for which there was no licence, all manner of indignation was released. How insensitive. Why stop a little bit of pleasure for the old folk? It was accepted that perhaps it had been a bit heavy-handed. However, it turned out that behind certainly one of the illicit bingo games was something a bit fishy that proved worthy of further investigation.
There is no real uncertainty regarding the playing of bingo. You need a licence. The absence of one may have something to do with plod having pounded down the corridors of a hotel in Sa Coma to put a stop to its bingo. I could always tell you which hotel, but I won't, because it's not been reported elsewhere, so I'd rather not say. But rest assured, keep checking Sa Coma hotels on "Trip Advisor" and there will doubtless be some entry referring to a bingo raid. "I was just about to call 'house', and this policeman took my card away. I shall be complaining to the tour operator."
One difference between the relatively small cerveza of the old folks' day centre bingo games and those in the hotel has to do with the amount of money the latter raise. Two and seven? Twenty-seven. Twenty-seven thousand euros. A month.
If you were to go and look on "Trip Advisor" and choose a hotel on Mallorca, you might well find mention of bingo among the entertainment on offer. Most hotels have games. And are they all correctly licensed? I couldn't begin to answer that question. But the two bingo associations - AESBI and ASBA - have been making repeated representations to relevant authorities regarding the need to "eradicate the large number of illegal bingo games that proliferate" on Mallorca and the other islands.
A couple of days before the raid in Sa Coma, the two associations had in fact presented a proposal for the establishment of electronic bingo terminals in hotels as part of their drive to stamp out illegal games. The proposal may well be greeted favourably, as a "win" would involve a ten per cent tax finding its way into the coffers of the Hacienda.
It will be instructive to see how this all pans out, as Mallorca's hotels, anticipating the likely change of national government, are putting together various proposals of a legal nature for the new Partido Popular administration to chew over.
One of these is to do with the law on intellectual property. This has an impact on the "complementary offer" of entertainment in its widest sense within hotels (of which, incidentally, the electronic bingo terminals would be a new addition, say the bingo associations). It doesn't have to do solely with any rights from musical performances. It also covers television.
Decisions by both the European Court of Justice and the Spanish Supreme Court have led to interpretations that television broadcasts in hotel rooms constitute "public communication" and are therefore liable to rights payments. This is because, for the most part, a cable or satellite signal is re-transmitted by the hotel to the rooms. Were signals to go directly to the rooms (far more costly to set up), then the communication would be private, meaning no broadcast rights payments.
On these two matters, the bingo and the broadcasting, I am with the bingo associations and the police but not with the public communication interpretation; charges are probably passed on for what is made public but is consumed in private. As for bingo, though it is harmless fun, it is fair to ask what actually happens to money that is raised. There is no uncertainty, or shouldn't be. Gaming is either licensed or it isn't.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
The Revolution Is Televised
The riots have claimed Mallorcan victims. Bar Brits. The cancellation of the international footy has deprived them of an important date in their calendars; those, that is, for whom the "season" revolves around the peaks of the football season and England internationals in particular.
Rather than cries of "England till I die", Bar Brits reverberate to the calls of "shoot 'em" and not "shoot, come on Rooney, shoot". These calls mix with demands that the army be brought in, that water cannons be used, that the birch be brought back along with National Service and, for good measure, hanging. Enoch is invoked, as Enoch tends to be invoked at such times.
There isn't a whole load of sympathy as Sky plays over and over scenes of unrest, looting, burning cars, burning buildings and fights with police. The Bar Brit punter doesn't want any of this; he wants to be able to watch the telly in order to vent his frustration at another dismal England performance and to shout abuse about Capello.
Sky though, along with the rest of the media, have played their own part. Social media may have been significant (why should anyone be surprised by this?), but rolling 24-hour news and constant images are also significant. They fuel greater disturbances as the hoody class seeks to find itself captured on camera.
This is, after all, the happy-slapping generation, one brought up on actual and personal depictions of unruliness and violence and on its self-aggrandising glorification. Being seen, albeit with a face masked or covered by a hood, is what counts. Being caught on digital film is the esteem maker for those without esteem. Attacks on reporters are not attacks to prevent filming, but attacks for attacks' sake. To prevent filming would undermine the ethos of riot in 2011; these have been riots by media and not social media. They disprove Gil Scott-Heron's poetry of the revolution not being televised.
And in Bar Brits, as in bars in Britain, the public is served its media diet and only too willingly regurgitates it. Words on the lips of Bar Brit occupants are "pure" and "criminality", a curious juxtaposition of adjective and noun, but one spouted as the on-message spin-bite by police, the Home Secretary and a Prime Minister forced to leave his tennis kit behind in Tuscany.
In 1981 the revolution was televised, too. A difference, however, was that there wasn't the cachet attached to being at the end of a lens. It was a televised revolution which gave an incomplete and at times false picture. Ealing, where I lived then, was caught up but not to anything like the way the trouble was represented. Unlike this time.
The revolution is televised not only on Sky and the BBC but also on Spanish TV. Riot by media is a global event, and the whole world can have its say. Spanish telly and press are lapping it all up, as are the chatterers on news sites. Spanish explanations for the riots cover easy access to benefits, Muslims, British imperialism, Conservative governments, a British mob mentality dating back to the Mods and Rockers, and the absence of a middle class in Britain. Some will be the same explanations of Brits themselves; others will make no sense, like the belief that there is no middle class and only rich and poor.
The Mods and Rockers one initially seems odd, but may not be as the riots are only partially a race thing. Whitey is engaged as well, finally finding a cause about which he can riot, one that The Clash called for as long ago as 1977. And the cause is a pair of Nike trainers.
Buried among the Spanish prescriptions on the internet, which have expanded into a free-for-all aimed at Magalluf and Benidorm tourists and demands for Gibraltar and the Malvinas to be returned, are the occasional voices who wonder if the same thing might happen in Spain. But as Spain has a middle class, and Britain doesn't have, then presumably it won't. You do get some pretty weird and distorted views, as you do from the Brits themselves.
Everyone knows what the causes of the riots are; or rather, they reckon they know. I have my own views as to the causes, but why should you be interested in knowing them? They might be right, they might be wrong. However, unlike 1981, when I lived in a part of London that was caught up in the riots, albeit to nothing like the extent that the media suggested, and lived in a city where I knew well enough the issues in Brent, Brixton, Southall, what do I know now?
Perhaps I know far more, however, because these are riots by media and the revolution is very clearly televised.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Rather than cries of "England till I die", Bar Brits reverberate to the calls of "shoot 'em" and not "shoot, come on Rooney, shoot". These calls mix with demands that the army be brought in, that water cannons be used, that the birch be brought back along with National Service and, for good measure, hanging. Enoch is invoked, as Enoch tends to be invoked at such times.
There isn't a whole load of sympathy as Sky plays over and over scenes of unrest, looting, burning cars, burning buildings and fights with police. The Bar Brit punter doesn't want any of this; he wants to be able to watch the telly in order to vent his frustration at another dismal England performance and to shout abuse about Capello.
Sky though, along with the rest of the media, have played their own part. Social media may have been significant (why should anyone be surprised by this?), but rolling 24-hour news and constant images are also significant. They fuel greater disturbances as the hoody class seeks to find itself captured on camera.
This is, after all, the happy-slapping generation, one brought up on actual and personal depictions of unruliness and violence and on its self-aggrandising glorification. Being seen, albeit with a face masked or covered by a hood, is what counts. Being caught on digital film is the esteem maker for those without esteem. Attacks on reporters are not attacks to prevent filming, but attacks for attacks' sake. To prevent filming would undermine the ethos of riot in 2011; these have been riots by media and not social media. They disprove Gil Scott-Heron's poetry of the revolution not being televised.
And in Bar Brits, as in bars in Britain, the public is served its media diet and only too willingly regurgitates it. Words on the lips of Bar Brit occupants are "pure" and "criminality", a curious juxtaposition of adjective and noun, but one spouted as the on-message spin-bite by police, the Home Secretary and a Prime Minister forced to leave his tennis kit behind in Tuscany.
In 1981 the revolution was televised, too. A difference, however, was that there wasn't the cachet attached to being at the end of a lens. It was a televised revolution which gave an incomplete and at times false picture. Ealing, where I lived then, was caught up but not to anything like the way the trouble was represented. Unlike this time.
The revolution is televised not only on Sky and the BBC but also on Spanish TV. Riot by media is a global event, and the whole world can have its say. Spanish telly and press are lapping it all up, as are the chatterers on news sites. Spanish explanations for the riots cover easy access to benefits, Muslims, British imperialism, Conservative governments, a British mob mentality dating back to the Mods and Rockers, and the absence of a middle class in Britain. Some will be the same explanations of Brits themselves; others will make no sense, like the belief that there is no middle class and only rich and poor.
The Mods and Rockers one initially seems odd, but may not be as the riots are only partially a race thing. Whitey is engaged as well, finally finding a cause about which he can riot, one that The Clash called for as long ago as 1977. And the cause is a pair of Nike trainers.
Buried among the Spanish prescriptions on the internet, which have expanded into a free-for-all aimed at Magalluf and Benidorm tourists and demands for Gibraltar and the Malvinas to be returned, are the occasional voices who wonder if the same thing might happen in Spain. But as Spain has a middle class, and Britain doesn't have, then presumably it won't. You do get some pretty weird and distorted views, as you do from the Brits themselves.
Everyone knows what the causes of the riots are; or rather, they reckon they know. I have my own views as to the causes, but why should you be interested in knowing them? They might be right, they might be wrong. However, unlike 1981, when I lived in a part of London that was caught up in the riots, albeit to nothing like the extent that the media suggested, and lived in a city where I knew well enough the issues in Brent, Brixton, Southall, what do I know now?
Perhaps I know far more, however, because these are riots by media and the revolution is very clearly televised.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Out In The Midday Sun: Mad Dogs
In Mallorcan climes there are certain times of day
When all the expats repair to switch their TVs on and conspire
It's one of those things these greatest fools obey
Because Sky is making publicity though Sky in Mallorca's not a strictly legal way
The expats fawn when the actors take to bars having finished their cuts
Because they're obviously, definitely, Nuts!
Mad Dogs for Englishmen with copies of their daily Sun
They take to the forums, pore over the press
I saw Simm, ah but I saw Max, and Glenister, he's the one
For Englishmen sights of celebrities are something with which to impress
In London town they have presented Mad Dogs in full media glare
The Mallorca tourism foundation, several thousands of euros of support, was happy to be there
The expats swoon at news of the excitement this has done
Mad Dogs for Englishmen with copies of their daily Sun
It's no surprise for the expats eyes to see
That the press will eat this hype and sycophantically treat
When the great Rupert rides, proportion there will not be
Because the simple expats are deflected from phone hacking and Richard Keys
It's the usual rot showing beautiful Mallorca off that gets trot from tourism board and press lackies too
And the expats do agree as to not do simply would not do
In Mallorca any dissenting is seldom if ever done
For it's Mad Dogs for Englishmen
With copies of their daily
Copies of their daily
Sky box strangely
Copies of their daily Sun
(With due acknowledgement to Noël Coward.)
* "Mad Dogs" will be on Sky from 10 February.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Index for January 2011
Chinese businesses - 10 January 2011
Climate change - 6 January 2011
FITUR: tourism promotion and finance - 22 January 2011
Government and local democracy, structure of - 24 January 2011
Hotels' strategy - 12 January 2011
January in Mallorca - 9 January 2011, 16 January 2011, 23 January 2011
Jaume I celebrations, violence and independence - 1 January 2011
Legumes - 5 January 2011
Luxury tourism - 19 January 2011
Mad Dogs - 31 January 2011
Mallorca in 2011 - 2 January 2011
Meetings incentives conventions and exhibitions tourism - 4 January 2011
Morality, tourism and - 30 January 2011
Operación Cloaca - 18 January 2011
Palm beetle in Puerto Pollensa - 27 January 2011
Plagiarism: Sant Sebastià poster - 14 January 2011
Population growth, Mallorca's - 7 January 2011
Porto Cristo bridge demolition - 29 January 2011
Prices in Mallorca - 26 January 2011
Prices, supply costs and - 3 January 2011
Q quality marks - 20 January 2011
Sant Antoni and Sant Sebastià: lack of promotion - 11 January 2011
Sant Antoni in Muro - 17 January 2011
Space heaters - 13 January 2011
Tourism agency director's resignation - 28 January 2011
Tourism promotion - 25 January 2011
Working day and productivity - 15 January 2011
Youth Olympics 2018 - 21 January 2011
When all the expats repair to switch their TVs on and conspire
It's one of those things these greatest fools obey
Because Sky is making publicity though Sky in Mallorca's not a strictly legal way
The expats fawn when the actors take to bars having finished their cuts
Because they're obviously, definitely, Nuts!
Mad Dogs for Englishmen with copies of their daily Sun
They take to the forums, pore over the press
I saw Simm, ah but I saw Max, and Glenister, he's the one
For Englishmen sights of celebrities are something with which to impress
In London town they have presented Mad Dogs in full media glare
The Mallorca tourism foundation, several thousands of euros of support, was happy to be there
The expats swoon at news of the excitement this has done
Mad Dogs for Englishmen with copies of their daily Sun
It's no surprise for the expats eyes to see
That the press will eat this hype and sycophantically treat
When the great Rupert rides, proportion there will not be
Because the simple expats are deflected from phone hacking and Richard Keys
It's the usual rot showing beautiful Mallorca off that gets trot from tourism board and press lackies too
And the expats do agree as to not do simply would not do
In Mallorca any dissenting is seldom if ever done
For it's Mad Dogs for Englishmen
With copies of their daily
Copies of their daily
Sky box strangely
Copies of their daily Sun
(With due acknowledgement to Noël Coward.)
* "Mad Dogs" will be on Sky from 10 February.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Index for January 2011
Chinese businesses - 10 January 2011
Climate change - 6 January 2011
FITUR: tourism promotion and finance - 22 January 2011
Government and local democracy, structure of - 24 January 2011
Hotels' strategy - 12 January 2011
January in Mallorca - 9 January 2011, 16 January 2011, 23 January 2011
Jaume I celebrations, violence and independence - 1 January 2011
Legumes - 5 January 2011
Luxury tourism - 19 January 2011
Mad Dogs - 31 January 2011
Mallorca in 2011 - 2 January 2011
Meetings incentives conventions and exhibitions tourism - 4 January 2011
Morality, tourism and - 30 January 2011
Operación Cloaca - 18 January 2011
Palm beetle in Puerto Pollensa - 27 January 2011
Plagiarism: Sant Sebastià poster - 14 January 2011
Population growth, Mallorca's - 7 January 2011
Porto Cristo bridge demolition - 29 January 2011
Prices in Mallorca - 26 January 2011
Prices, supply costs and - 3 January 2011
Q quality marks - 20 January 2011
Sant Antoni and Sant Sebastià: lack of promotion - 11 January 2011
Sant Antoni in Muro - 17 January 2011
Space heaters - 13 January 2011
Tourism agency director's resignation - 28 January 2011
Tourism promotion - 25 January 2011
Working day and productivity - 15 January 2011
Youth Olympics 2018 - 21 January 2011
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Dubbed: Television and language
Come on now, admit it. How often do you ever watch a television programme in Spanish? If you don't live in Mallorca or Spain, you're forgiven, but if you do ... . There is one very good reason for not watching Spanish telly, apart from the language issue, and this is that, for the most part, it is unrelenting garbage. Better that you stick to "X Factor" or "I'm A Celebrity"; altogether more culturally enriching.
I'm not going to be holier than thou. I don't watch Spanish telly much. I used to, before I realised just how bad it was. What limited diet I have is largely confined to football. I should make more of an effort as there are some gems of the bizarre, such as the channel which seems to be devoted to a woman reading Tarot cards or human towers competitions replete with slow-mo action replays of a small child slipping and crashing onto the bodies below.
Foreign programmes are usually always dubbed, and there are an awful lot of them. Yes, you can view some in the original language as well, but for the Spaniard the voiceover (VO) is preferable. The Germans do it as well to films and telly programmes. It is so ridiculous that I once saw an interview with the boy who was the German "Harry Potter" and who had become a star in his own right. In Spanish I have watched "The Shawshank Redemption" with a Morgan Freeman who probably comes from Madrid and who almost certainly isn't black.
Dubbing, as opposed to showing programmes in the original language (almost always, therefore, English) with subtitles, may lead to the madness of an actor's personality being stripped away by a VO artist, but it can also have a serious aspect, in that it inhibits the learning of English.
However, the experience in Germany is quite telling. Though German TV dubs, the standard of English in Germany is high, far higher than it is in Mallorca or Spain. Television does have a role to play in teaching English, and no more so than in the Netherlands where, together with an educational system which promotes English from an early age, the watching of shows in English has been established practice for many years, given that the BBC has long been available. But television can't overcome an instinctive problem, one to do with the sounds of language.
There is an article by Nick Lyne about Spanish television, dubbing and language acquisition on the qorreo.com website. It's interesting, but what is even more interesting is a comment about the article. This makes the point that the Spanish language has a "particularly not-rich set of sounds in its register". This means that it can be difficult to pronounce, speak and therefore learn other languages, such as English.
The contrast is made with, for example, Dutch which is a much richer language in terms of sounds. I would guess that the same applies to German. The greater the range of sounds in a native tongue, the easier it is to acquire other languages; or so the theory seems to go. Without getting too technical, Spanish has comparatively few spoken sounds compared with English. A linguist at the Spanish equivalent of the Open University has made the point that Spanish pronunciation of English is poor because the greater number of English sounds are reduced to the few of Spanish. (Incidentally, Catalan has a few more sounds than Spanish which should, in theory, make things easier.)
The imbalance in sound recognition has major implications for the teaching of English in schools. The same linguist has said that no one seems to be bothering to make the acquisition of new sounds a key element of English. The extension of English use in teaching in Spanish and Mallorcan schools is all well and good, but how good are the teachers themselves at speaking it correctly? Despite the number of years of English instruction, the professor of language psychology at the University of Navarra is concerned that pupils leave school still not knowing how to speak English.
Earlier this year, a survey of students at the university in Palma discovered that 68% admitted to not understanding English. It may not be essential for all of them in their future careers that they do, but given the importance of English in international business and in local tourism the deficiency is somewhat startling. By a remarkable coincidence, a survey of foreign language use by students and adults in different European countries by the Eurostat research organisation at the European Commission revealed that 68% of secondary school pupils in Spain learn one foreign language - English. Learn, but can they use?
The same Eurostat survey placed Spain in the bottom three of countries in which adults speak no foreign language. And no, the UK was not behind Spain; in fact the UK does pretty well in this respect.
But to return to television. Much recent debate surrounding language and whether English originals should be shown on TV was kicked off by Fox's decision to broadcast "House" in English with subtitles. So, you'll be able to watch it in English if you want to. The question is: will the Spanish?
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
I'm not going to be holier than thou. I don't watch Spanish telly much. I used to, before I realised just how bad it was. What limited diet I have is largely confined to football. I should make more of an effort as there are some gems of the bizarre, such as the channel which seems to be devoted to a woman reading Tarot cards or human towers competitions replete with slow-mo action replays of a small child slipping and crashing onto the bodies below.
Foreign programmes are usually always dubbed, and there are an awful lot of them. Yes, you can view some in the original language as well, but for the Spaniard the voiceover (VO) is preferable. The Germans do it as well to films and telly programmes. It is so ridiculous that I once saw an interview with the boy who was the German "Harry Potter" and who had become a star in his own right. In Spanish I have watched "The Shawshank Redemption" with a Morgan Freeman who probably comes from Madrid and who almost certainly isn't black.
Dubbing, as opposed to showing programmes in the original language (almost always, therefore, English) with subtitles, may lead to the madness of an actor's personality being stripped away by a VO artist, but it can also have a serious aspect, in that it inhibits the learning of English.
However, the experience in Germany is quite telling. Though German TV dubs, the standard of English in Germany is high, far higher than it is in Mallorca or Spain. Television does have a role to play in teaching English, and no more so than in the Netherlands where, together with an educational system which promotes English from an early age, the watching of shows in English has been established practice for many years, given that the BBC has long been available. But television can't overcome an instinctive problem, one to do with the sounds of language.
There is an article by Nick Lyne about Spanish television, dubbing and language acquisition on the qorreo.com website. It's interesting, but what is even more interesting is a comment about the article. This makes the point that the Spanish language has a "particularly not-rich set of sounds in its register". This means that it can be difficult to pronounce, speak and therefore learn other languages, such as English.
The contrast is made with, for example, Dutch which is a much richer language in terms of sounds. I would guess that the same applies to German. The greater the range of sounds in a native tongue, the easier it is to acquire other languages; or so the theory seems to go. Without getting too technical, Spanish has comparatively few spoken sounds compared with English. A linguist at the Spanish equivalent of the Open University has made the point that Spanish pronunciation of English is poor because the greater number of English sounds are reduced to the few of Spanish. (Incidentally, Catalan has a few more sounds than Spanish which should, in theory, make things easier.)
The imbalance in sound recognition has major implications for the teaching of English in schools. The same linguist has said that no one seems to be bothering to make the acquisition of new sounds a key element of English. The extension of English use in teaching in Spanish and Mallorcan schools is all well and good, but how good are the teachers themselves at speaking it correctly? Despite the number of years of English instruction, the professor of language psychology at the University of Navarra is concerned that pupils leave school still not knowing how to speak English.
Earlier this year, a survey of students at the university in Palma discovered that 68% admitted to not understanding English. It may not be essential for all of them in their future careers that they do, but given the importance of English in international business and in local tourism the deficiency is somewhat startling. By a remarkable coincidence, a survey of foreign language use by students and adults in different European countries by the Eurostat research organisation at the European Commission revealed that 68% of secondary school pupils in Spain learn one foreign language - English. Learn, but can they use?
The same Eurostat survey placed Spain in the bottom three of countries in which adults speak no foreign language. And no, the UK was not behind Spain; in fact the UK does pretty well in this respect.
But to return to television. Much recent debate surrounding language and whether English originals should be shown on TV was kicked off by Fox's decision to broadcast "House" in English with subtitles. So, you'll be able to watch it in English if you want to. The question is: will the Spanish?
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Monday, January 04, 2010
Reflections Of ...
The way life used to be. Sort of. I confess though that I had never, until a few days ago, ever had a conversation about the smell of washing powder. Go to England, and one of the first topics for discussion centres on the odour of a sweatshirt. Is it Ariel, is it Fairy or Persil? Who knows? Who, quite honestly, cares? But the conversation took place, nevertheless. Welcome to England, welcome to detergent dog days in reverse - the coldest weather for years, and slap bang over the Christmas period. Slip, sliding away. You don't get that ice or snow on an average December morn in northern Mallorca. Ever. Or talks about the competing merits of Procter & Gamble and Unilever.
Oh to be in England, now that winter's here. Rip-off England people say. Ripping off whom? And with what? Ah, you know, Mallorca's so expensive. Funnily enough, it is. We have been lulled into false senses of financial security, false beliefs about how England is more expensive. No it isn't. And it works better, despite nothing moving when there's some snow. Where's there an Argos catalogue in Mallorca, for example? Or a Primark, an Original Factory Shop? Fully clothed for twenty quid. Not in Mallorca, unless by means of a charity shop. Ok, so six quid for parking for three hours in the centre of Windsor is a bit steep, but someone's got to pay for Her Majesty.
Yea, but there's the corruption. Of course there is, but that corruption - you know the variety, that involving MPs' expenses - it's not the same. It's not in a Mallorcan premier league of nepotism and utter disregard for any sense of morality. At least ducks can get a bath in England, courtesy of a touch of fiddlery-pokery. And there are also the mass cultural experiences, shared by all via the startling array of different technologies with which numerous outlets entice consumers with even more startling arrays of offers - genuine ones, lower-cost ones. David Tennant, David Tennant, David Tennant. Wherever you were, David Tennant via the magicking of those cut-throat pricing schemes. David Tennant, Gavin and Stacey, Larry Lamb dead in one place and on a Barry Island beach for one final man-boob fling in another.
And on grey, endlessly grey days that drift into darkness and night by three in the afternoon, there is still all that landscape. From the snow fields of the Chilterns to the dips and inclines of the Mendips and Cotswolds, the sweeps of greeny-brown, an ancient church of Saxon origin, the gargoyle water ducts monstrously staring down on shivering visitors, Japanese students with a constant snip and snap of a digital camera. The enduring politeness and manners of a bakery-caff with jars of flavours secured with gauze, the lady serving in an Upstairs Downstairs bonnet. But there is one thing - the coffee. It never tastes right. It looks strong enough, but isn't. The English can't make coffee, even if the Mallorcans go too far in the other direction, unless you ask them not to.
They know their context though. In England. The Mallorcans don't always know it, or recognise it. They too often destroy it. Like the Can Ramis building in Alcúdia. Yet in Bath, huge amounts have been spent on a new shopping area with sharp-chiselled and finely-finished Bath stone. It is in keeping, it knows its place, albeit that to walk through it is to feel as though one is in a computer simulation. The virtual shopping centre of an architect's brief has become real virtuality, right there in the centre of the city.
The grim reality though is there to be witnessed close up. The machine guns of the police taking a quick coffee at a coffee shop with weak coffee in Stansted. Someone talks to them, asks them about the guns. Somehow you can't imagine asking a Guardia officer about his hardware. These coppers, young, really they were young - and I know all that guff about getting old when coppers look young - but they were. The guns are heavy they say. And they look it. A bit later, one stood guard, the gun held ominously across his chest, whilst his mate went for a leak. What do you do with a weapon of less than mass destruction when you need a slash? "Excuse me, mate. Couldn't hold this Heckler & Koch while I get Percy out, could you?" The grim reality of travelling. Of the infuriation that is RyanAir, or the hour plus queue for checking-in EasyJets all scheduled at around the same time. Want to know why it's a good idea to check-in online? Try a red-eye queue with eight other sleepy-faced flights replete with their freaky surfies having traded in their boards for skis to Innsbruck and whole displaced populations of Poland getting the hell back to Krakow.
But more than anything it's all that landscape and indeed townscape. It doesn't matter that there is so little colour, so much apparent meteorological drabness. It still amazes you, its reflections of the way things used to be. There's this thing about the paradise island, you know what it is. Mallorca, all that dramatic scenery and even some which isn't, some which is overblown, hyped and puffed, like the spoken-by-rote, sycophancy-through-groupthink eulogies for Pollensa's pinewalk. Does it really compare? No really - does it? Someone said that when people go on holiday, it's the only time they take time to actually look at things. In England, they don't look at things, only the telly. They don't stop to marvel, and so when they come away they see things and make of them a spectacular scenery, which there may well be - the Tramuntana mountains for example. But they have been entranced by an enchantment of the different, of the exotic, and assume a superiority of landscape in terms both of this difference and of their own reflected superiority. Yet they have failed to see the spectacular that surrounds them and so create icons of foreign vistas and views because they (these vistas) are foreign and because they - the visitors - may stop for once and actually look. It is this assumption of superiority that makes them not look and reflect on their own country, its drama and theatre, its curved or carved order, its mystery and legacy.
Oh to be in England, now that winter's here.
QUIZ
Today's title - supreme.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Oh to be in England, now that winter's here. Rip-off England people say. Ripping off whom? And with what? Ah, you know, Mallorca's so expensive. Funnily enough, it is. We have been lulled into false senses of financial security, false beliefs about how England is more expensive. No it isn't. And it works better, despite nothing moving when there's some snow. Where's there an Argos catalogue in Mallorca, for example? Or a Primark, an Original Factory Shop? Fully clothed for twenty quid. Not in Mallorca, unless by means of a charity shop. Ok, so six quid for parking for three hours in the centre of Windsor is a bit steep, but someone's got to pay for Her Majesty.
Yea, but there's the corruption. Of course there is, but that corruption - you know the variety, that involving MPs' expenses - it's not the same. It's not in a Mallorcan premier league of nepotism and utter disregard for any sense of morality. At least ducks can get a bath in England, courtesy of a touch of fiddlery-pokery. And there are also the mass cultural experiences, shared by all via the startling array of different technologies with which numerous outlets entice consumers with even more startling arrays of offers - genuine ones, lower-cost ones. David Tennant, David Tennant, David Tennant. Wherever you were, David Tennant via the magicking of those cut-throat pricing schemes. David Tennant, Gavin and Stacey, Larry Lamb dead in one place and on a Barry Island beach for one final man-boob fling in another.
And on grey, endlessly grey days that drift into darkness and night by three in the afternoon, there is still all that landscape. From the snow fields of the Chilterns to the dips and inclines of the Mendips and Cotswolds, the sweeps of greeny-brown, an ancient church of Saxon origin, the gargoyle water ducts monstrously staring down on shivering visitors, Japanese students with a constant snip and snap of a digital camera. The enduring politeness and manners of a bakery-caff with jars of flavours secured with gauze, the lady serving in an Upstairs Downstairs bonnet. But there is one thing - the coffee. It never tastes right. It looks strong enough, but isn't. The English can't make coffee, even if the Mallorcans go too far in the other direction, unless you ask them not to.
They know their context though. In England. The Mallorcans don't always know it, or recognise it. They too often destroy it. Like the Can Ramis building in Alcúdia. Yet in Bath, huge amounts have been spent on a new shopping area with sharp-chiselled and finely-finished Bath stone. It is in keeping, it knows its place, albeit that to walk through it is to feel as though one is in a computer simulation. The virtual shopping centre of an architect's brief has become real virtuality, right there in the centre of the city.
The grim reality though is there to be witnessed close up. The machine guns of the police taking a quick coffee at a coffee shop with weak coffee in Stansted. Someone talks to them, asks them about the guns. Somehow you can't imagine asking a Guardia officer about his hardware. These coppers, young, really they were young - and I know all that guff about getting old when coppers look young - but they were. The guns are heavy they say. And they look it. A bit later, one stood guard, the gun held ominously across his chest, whilst his mate went for a leak. What do you do with a weapon of less than mass destruction when you need a slash? "Excuse me, mate. Couldn't hold this Heckler & Koch while I get Percy out, could you?" The grim reality of travelling. Of the infuriation that is RyanAir, or the hour plus queue for checking-in EasyJets all scheduled at around the same time. Want to know why it's a good idea to check-in online? Try a red-eye queue with eight other sleepy-faced flights replete with their freaky surfies having traded in their boards for skis to Innsbruck and whole displaced populations of Poland getting the hell back to Krakow.
But more than anything it's all that landscape and indeed townscape. It doesn't matter that there is so little colour, so much apparent meteorological drabness. It still amazes you, its reflections of the way things used to be. There's this thing about the paradise island, you know what it is. Mallorca, all that dramatic scenery and even some which isn't, some which is overblown, hyped and puffed, like the spoken-by-rote, sycophancy-through-groupthink eulogies for Pollensa's pinewalk. Does it really compare? No really - does it? Someone said that when people go on holiday, it's the only time they take time to actually look at things. In England, they don't look at things, only the telly. They don't stop to marvel, and so when they come away they see things and make of them a spectacular scenery, which there may well be - the Tramuntana mountains for example. But they have been entranced by an enchantment of the different, of the exotic, and assume a superiority of landscape in terms both of this difference and of their own reflected superiority. Yet they have failed to see the spectacular that surrounds them and so create icons of foreign vistas and views because they (these vistas) are foreign and because they - the visitors - may stop for once and actually look. It is this assumption of superiority that makes them not look and reflect on their own country, its drama and theatre, its curved or carved order, its mystery and legacy.
Oh to be in England, now that winter's here.
QUIZ
Today's title - supreme.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
Flim Flam Man
Something of a follow-up day today. Follow-up to two stories, one about Columbus, the other about "Sun, Sea and A&E". Both stem from comments received.
To Columbus first, and the piece on The Columbus Industry. The author of the comment describes much of the evidence that seeks to establish Columbus's place of birth as anywhere other than Genoa as "flim flam". A rather good expression. I must use it myself some time. Intuitively, I cannot go along with the non-Genoa hypotheses, while factually there is, as the commentator points out, much which does uphold the Genoa argument.
When the book by Estelle Irizarry and its findings were being reported, it was being said that it had been proved that Columbus was Catalan. The book has done no such thing. Had it been irrefutably proved, then there would have been one hell of a song and dance. But there wasn't, because it hadn't been. What the book has done is to advance an important contribution to the Columbus debate, one that underscores previous work that has sought to make the Catalan link. And it is genuinely important as it has addressed Columbus's use of language, one that has baffled historians and also baffled his contemporaries, such as Las Casas. Irizarry may have established a Catalan element and also established that Columbus spoke Catalan (or a Ladino variant) before Castilian, but this, in itself, does not mean that he might not have acquired this somewhere other than Catalonia or Aragon. Until it can be proved, indisputably, that Columbus was born somewhere other than Genoa, the debate will continue, and the Genoa argument will continue to hold sway.
Mallorca on the telly
And so to "Sun, Sea and A&E". I think I have upset someone, namely Gill Bucklitsch, the lady who works at Muro hospital, is featured on the programme and who was interviewed by "The Bulletin", something that inspired an earlier piece. She found it "rather insulting". In which case I apologise. It is not my intention to offend.
Moving on, the piece was one about the celebrity that comes from reality TV and also TV's portrayal of Mallorca, one that I described as "telly froth". I'm afraid that I don't buy the argument that reality TV is somehow promotion for Mallorca. That "Sun, Sea and A&E" shows local health services and staff in a positive light is commendable, but do people choose their holidays on the basis of medical provision? Perhaps they ought to, in which case they wouldn't go to Egypt if they heard of the story of the eight-year-old girl who was whisked away from her parents, suspected of having landed with swine flu.
When Clarkson and the boys came to do their "Top Gear" show, it was also said that this would be good for Mallorca. Why? It was a programme about cars and a rally, not a travelogue. The interest for some would have been heightened as they would have known the location, that I can see, but it would not necessarily result in a sudden rush of bookings from those who didn't. That there is now talk of a new race-track for Mallorca may be beneficial, though don't let's expect an Abu Dhabi and Button and Vettel haring around a Mallorcan F1 circuit any time soon. Nevertheless, with the sun shining, Mallorca did look pretty good during whatever it was the Top Gear trio were doing, and I can't pretend to understand what, other than the fact they were driving cars - some of the time.
Otherwise, what would make for good TV for Mallorca? Travel shows, yes, a decent drama series, yes. A soap might even do it. And then there might be historical dramas. Chopin's winter in Mallorca wouldn't do, as a truthful telling would reveal how much he disliked Valldemossa. Robert Graves possibly, though I'm not sure what. Or how about the Moors and the Christians? Shot on location around Pollensa, though the chances of a British production team doing it would be remote, on the grounds of religious insensitivity. Shame, it could make a rollicking good drama. The story of the reclaiming of Albufera? Shot on location around Alcúdia, Sa Pobla and Muro. There are probably any number of possibilities that would be genuinely meaningful.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Superb, The Decemberists. This is them on Letterman, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vlb197LmwSw. And here is the shorter version of the O Valencia video.
Today's title - this was a film with George C. Scott, and there was also a song by one of the most distinctive female vocalists from the '60s and '70s.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
To Columbus first, and the piece on The Columbus Industry. The author of the comment describes much of the evidence that seeks to establish Columbus's place of birth as anywhere other than Genoa as "flim flam". A rather good expression. I must use it myself some time. Intuitively, I cannot go along with the non-Genoa hypotheses, while factually there is, as the commentator points out, much which does uphold the Genoa argument.
When the book by Estelle Irizarry and its findings were being reported, it was being said that it had been proved that Columbus was Catalan. The book has done no such thing. Had it been irrefutably proved, then there would have been one hell of a song and dance. But there wasn't, because it hadn't been. What the book has done is to advance an important contribution to the Columbus debate, one that underscores previous work that has sought to make the Catalan link. And it is genuinely important as it has addressed Columbus's use of language, one that has baffled historians and also baffled his contemporaries, such as Las Casas. Irizarry may have established a Catalan element and also established that Columbus spoke Catalan (or a Ladino variant) before Castilian, but this, in itself, does not mean that he might not have acquired this somewhere other than Catalonia or Aragon. Until it can be proved, indisputably, that Columbus was born somewhere other than Genoa, the debate will continue, and the Genoa argument will continue to hold sway.
Mallorca on the telly
And so to "Sun, Sea and A&E". I think I have upset someone, namely Gill Bucklitsch, the lady who works at Muro hospital, is featured on the programme and who was interviewed by "The Bulletin", something that inspired an earlier piece. She found it "rather insulting". In which case I apologise. It is not my intention to offend.
Moving on, the piece was one about the celebrity that comes from reality TV and also TV's portrayal of Mallorca, one that I described as "telly froth". I'm afraid that I don't buy the argument that reality TV is somehow promotion for Mallorca. That "Sun, Sea and A&E" shows local health services and staff in a positive light is commendable, but do people choose their holidays on the basis of medical provision? Perhaps they ought to, in which case they wouldn't go to Egypt if they heard of the story of the eight-year-old girl who was whisked away from her parents, suspected of having landed with swine flu.
When Clarkson and the boys came to do their "Top Gear" show, it was also said that this would be good for Mallorca. Why? It was a programme about cars and a rally, not a travelogue. The interest for some would have been heightened as they would have known the location, that I can see, but it would not necessarily result in a sudden rush of bookings from those who didn't. That there is now talk of a new race-track for Mallorca may be beneficial, though don't let's expect an Abu Dhabi and Button and Vettel haring around a Mallorcan F1 circuit any time soon. Nevertheless, with the sun shining, Mallorca did look pretty good during whatever it was the Top Gear trio were doing, and I can't pretend to understand what, other than the fact they were driving cars - some of the time.
Otherwise, what would make for good TV for Mallorca? Travel shows, yes, a decent drama series, yes. A soap might even do it. And then there might be historical dramas. Chopin's winter in Mallorca wouldn't do, as a truthful telling would reveal how much he disliked Valldemossa. Robert Graves possibly, though I'm not sure what. Or how about the Moors and the Christians? Shot on location around Pollensa, though the chances of a British production team doing it would be remote, on the grounds of religious insensitivity. Shame, it could make a rollicking good drama. The story of the reclaiming of Albufera? Shot on location around Alcúdia, Sa Pobla and Muro. There are probably any number of possibilities that would be genuinely meaningful.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Superb, The Decemberists. This is them on Letterman, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vlb197LmwSw. And here is the shorter version of the O Valencia video.
Today's title - this was a film with George C. Scott, and there was also a song by one of the most distinctive female vocalists from the '60s and '70s.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Always Shines On TV
The more I think about it, the more I think I might, were I in a position to worry about such things, be worried that this Top Gear Classic Car Rally thing might not be the wonderful advert for Mallorca some seem to believe that it will be. Put it this way - why are they coming to Mallorca, for this particular rally? Clarkson and the boys don't do veiled PR exercises for tourist authorities; they do taking the piss. And that, the more I think about it, is what might, perhaps should, worry some.
Oh that these were still the glory days of motoring - a sedate drive in the countryside, yer best girl by yer side, yer dashing moustache and yer Brylcreemed hair set in concrete against the open-topped breeze; the mountains in the background as yer pull up by a marina for a G and T stiffener with David Niven. Unfortunately, things aren't like that anymore. There is also the not inconsiderable factor of Clarkson's total absence of political correctness. This, as anyone who reads him will be aware, manifests itself in a variety of ways, such as the fact that he would be the last person who might be described as an environmentalism fellow traveller. Then there is the matter of killing wildlife.
I fear there may be this rather misguided impression that this is all going to be an advert for Mallorcan landscape and its wonderful environment. There may well indeed be landscape, but there will also be some serious pollution occurring. Those classic cars do about a kilometre to the gallon. Haring around the roads going into the Tramuntana could be bad news for local hares as well. Or indeed any other poor animal that happens to get in the way. A classic car rally is just about the single most environmentally damaging event that one could possibly dream up, which is probably part of the reason that they're taking part. Then there is the potential for, well, just taking the Michael, and there is no shortage of potential in this respect.
The Top Gear programme comes at a time when apparently there is to be some reality thing showing how expats here are coping, or not, with the credit crunch. Doubtless there will be some poor saps who put their hands up to take part and are made to look total idiots - for that is the way it is with TV. Take also this "Sun, Sea and A&E" reality docu (5 February: Murder On The Dancefloor). There have been three articles about this programme in "The Bulletin" over the past week. Why, do you suppose? Because it's news? I doubt it. Seems more like PR for the show, and moreover, if it has not received criticism for being patronising, then it should have; patronising because the message that has come out of the programme is that Mallorca has good health facilities - as if this should come as a big surprise. This is Mallorca, not some basket case bit of African jungle.
All these shows may, in some respects, be beneficial for Mallorca, but please don't let's be naïve in thinking that they exist just as a way of promoting the island.
Following on from yesterday's item about Brussels and Balearic money and fire runs and so on, a local councillor from Palma has apparently been impressing upon European commissioners that were it to be the case that fire runs were outlawed then legal action would probably be taken to reverse this. As I said before, how to win friends and influence bureaucracts. Here we have a councillor making a sort of threat while at the same time many - some other 149 or so - compatriots are attempting to extract money from the same political entity. Here's a scenario, a dilemma and a question for you to consider: You are a Mallorcan politician, you go to Brussels as part of a delegation to try and obtain a whole bunch more funding from the European piggy-bank. The Euro-meisters say, "ok, we'll give you the money, so long as you agree to stop setting fire to your streets and to conducting fire runs, and to following - to the letter - the European directive on pyrotechnics". Do you, as a Mallorcan politician, accept this as a reasonable compromise, dismiss it as a form of bribery or demand the money and the continuation of the tradition?
It's most unlikely that this scenario would occur, but there does come a point where you can't have your cake and set fire to it, too, which is what the 150 who have marched on Brussels would presumably want.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Deep Purple (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WX_4FNoto4). Today's title - for years I thought the lyric meant that the sun shone onto the television set.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Oh that these were still the glory days of motoring - a sedate drive in the countryside, yer best girl by yer side, yer dashing moustache and yer Brylcreemed hair set in concrete against the open-topped breeze; the mountains in the background as yer pull up by a marina for a G and T stiffener with David Niven. Unfortunately, things aren't like that anymore. There is also the not inconsiderable factor of Clarkson's total absence of political correctness. This, as anyone who reads him will be aware, manifests itself in a variety of ways, such as the fact that he would be the last person who might be described as an environmentalism fellow traveller. Then there is the matter of killing wildlife.
I fear there may be this rather misguided impression that this is all going to be an advert for Mallorcan landscape and its wonderful environment. There may well indeed be landscape, but there will also be some serious pollution occurring. Those classic cars do about a kilometre to the gallon. Haring around the roads going into the Tramuntana could be bad news for local hares as well. Or indeed any other poor animal that happens to get in the way. A classic car rally is just about the single most environmentally damaging event that one could possibly dream up, which is probably part of the reason that they're taking part. Then there is the potential for, well, just taking the Michael, and there is no shortage of potential in this respect.
The Top Gear programme comes at a time when apparently there is to be some reality thing showing how expats here are coping, or not, with the credit crunch. Doubtless there will be some poor saps who put their hands up to take part and are made to look total idiots - for that is the way it is with TV. Take also this "Sun, Sea and A&E" reality docu (5 February: Murder On The Dancefloor). There have been three articles about this programme in "The Bulletin" over the past week. Why, do you suppose? Because it's news? I doubt it. Seems more like PR for the show, and moreover, if it has not received criticism for being patronising, then it should have; patronising because the message that has come out of the programme is that Mallorca has good health facilities - as if this should come as a big surprise. This is Mallorca, not some basket case bit of African jungle.
All these shows may, in some respects, be beneficial for Mallorca, but please don't let's be naïve in thinking that they exist just as a way of promoting the island.
Following on from yesterday's item about Brussels and Balearic money and fire runs and so on, a local councillor from Palma has apparently been impressing upon European commissioners that were it to be the case that fire runs were outlawed then legal action would probably be taken to reverse this. As I said before, how to win friends and influence bureaucracts. Here we have a councillor making a sort of threat while at the same time many - some other 149 or so - compatriots are attempting to extract money from the same political entity. Here's a scenario, a dilemma and a question for you to consider: You are a Mallorcan politician, you go to Brussels as part of a delegation to try and obtain a whole bunch more funding from the European piggy-bank. The Euro-meisters say, "ok, we'll give you the money, so long as you agree to stop setting fire to your streets and to conducting fire runs, and to following - to the letter - the European directive on pyrotechnics". Do you, as a Mallorcan politician, accept this as a reasonable compromise, dismiss it as a form of bribery or demand the money and the continuation of the tradition?
It's most unlikely that this scenario would occur, but there does come a point where you can't have your cake and set fire to it, too, which is what the 150 who have marched on Brussels would presumably want.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Deep Purple (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WX_4FNoto4). Today's title - for years I thought the lyric meant that the sun shone onto the television set.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Two Lanes Will Take Us Anywhere
The power of shaming. Sara did duly send me some snippets, one of which confirmed that it would indeed be illegal to drive with one's wing mirrors detached or in some way not meeting the requirements. The local driving theory book - in its English version, it must be pointed out - is full of "requirements", "obligations" and so on, which suggests it was originally written in fact by a German. Anyway, perhaps the most important thing to emerge has to do with roundabouts, the negotiation of which - for anyone who has ever attempted this here - is open to considerable interpretation as to precisely what one should do. So, here we go, and definitely wake up at the back because this is important stuff.
Right, you have two lanes going towards a roundabout. Let's assume, for one moment, that it is the Pointed Thing, some say Fish Hook Roundabout at the great Muro-Alcúdia divide, itself a roundabout of two lanes - theoretically at any rate - and that you are coming from Can Picafort. Now, the left exit goes to Palma and Sa Pobla, and that is where you want to go. So, the question is this. In which lane do you approach the roundabout and then remain as you circumnavigate the Pointed Thing?
If you have said the left-hand lane, you would be wrong, because it's the right. But for those of you with hands-on or should that be wheels-on experience of this particular roundabout, you will know that virtually no-one follows this procedure. I include myself in this. Indeed, those who do cause considerable confusion (see below). Yet, here is the evidence:
"As the exits are situated on the right (by which it means, one presumes, that you leave a roundabout by turning right), the driver must, as a general rule, situate himself in the right hand lane in order to exit. The exit must always take place using the right turn signal (indicating right) in advance but ensuring that no confusion is caused to other road users."
All clear? Well, of course, it isn't thanks, in particular, to that marvellous caveat "as a general rule". Anything that explains itself by reference to "as a general rule" can of course be interpreted in an entirely different way. One should also note the second brackets in the above, which are from the book and are not my own. They contain the mysterious word "indicating". For you and I this might well be understandable, but local Mallorcan folk would struggle even with a Catalan translation of the word. It comes as something of a surprise that the act of indicating is even mentioned, especially as it is intended to ensure that "no confusion is caused to other road users", because the creation of maximum confusion has always seemed to me to be uppermost in the minds of those using local roundabouts. And the indication "using the right turn signal" does seem to rather contradict convention which is, when the indicator is used at all, to signal left.
Still, I am immensely grateful to Sara, and I'm sure you will all wish to thank her as well and to wish her great success with her driving lessons. And may she always, as a general rule, exit using her right turn signal.
One wonders, still on matters of an automotive nature, whether those taking part in the Classic Car Rally are subject to the same rules, or absence of the rules of the Mallorcan road as others. It is a not unimportant issue because, as mentioned before, the Top Gear boys are going to be hacking around the tarmac of the island this year, and one would hate for them to fall foul of Trafico. Were they to do so might cast a shadow over what otherwise should prove to be a very positive thing for Mallorca. Top Gear has not only a large audience in the UK, it is has a worldwide following. It all does rather depend, though, on how much coverage there is and of what. Meanwhile, "The Bulletin" says that, following its breaking of the news that Clarkson and his chums were on their way, the British community has been "thrown into a frenzy". Perhaps I am one of those because a frenzy means a state of mental derangement, and, along with all British expats, I am mentally deranged as a consequence of knowing that Jeremy Clarkson will be in Mallorca. Actually, this frenzy has been a "long list of people wishing to get involved". And you could just about have predicted it - all manner of bloody wannabes and hangers-on will be wishing to grab a piece of the action. The expat socialite set will be seeking to decamp from their normal places of vacuity for some photo ops with Jezza and co. Platinum blondes of wrinkly brownness tottering in a Barbara Windsor manner atop non-sensible twin towers of Jimmy Choo's accompanied by their husbands - the Blingmaster Flashes. I trust that Clarkson will bring with him his sharpest of pens.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Whitney Houston (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aiJ_2zQYUFg). Today's title - comes from what is considered one of his finest; he's a bossy sort and the song has a weather element.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Right, you have two lanes going towards a roundabout. Let's assume, for one moment, that it is the Pointed Thing, some say Fish Hook Roundabout at the great Muro-Alcúdia divide, itself a roundabout of two lanes - theoretically at any rate - and that you are coming from Can Picafort. Now, the left exit goes to Palma and Sa Pobla, and that is where you want to go. So, the question is this. In which lane do you approach the roundabout and then remain as you circumnavigate the Pointed Thing?
If you have said the left-hand lane, you would be wrong, because it's the right. But for those of you with hands-on or should that be wheels-on experience of this particular roundabout, you will know that virtually no-one follows this procedure. I include myself in this. Indeed, those who do cause considerable confusion (see below). Yet, here is the evidence:
"As the exits are situated on the right (by which it means, one presumes, that you leave a roundabout by turning right), the driver must, as a general rule, situate himself in the right hand lane in order to exit. The exit must always take place using the right turn signal (indicating right) in advance but ensuring that no confusion is caused to other road users."
All clear? Well, of course, it isn't thanks, in particular, to that marvellous caveat "as a general rule". Anything that explains itself by reference to "as a general rule" can of course be interpreted in an entirely different way. One should also note the second brackets in the above, which are from the book and are not my own. They contain the mysterious word "indicating". For you and I this might well be understandable, but local Mallorcan folk would struggle even with a Catalan translation of the word. It comes as something of a surprise that the act of indicating is even mentioned, especially as it is intended to ensure that "no confusion is caused to other road users", because the creation of maximum confusion has always seemed to me to be uppermost in the minds of those using local roundabouts. And the indication "using the right turn signal" does seem to rather contradict convention which is, when the indicator is used at all, to signal left.
Still, I am immensely grateful to Sara, and I'm sure you will all wish to thank her as well and to wish her great success with her driving lessons. And may she always, as a general rule, exit using her right turn signal.
One wonders, still on matters of an automotive nature, whether those taking part in the Classic Car Rally are subject to the same rules, or absence of the rules of the Mallorcan road as others. It is a not unimportant issue because, as mentioned before, the Top Gear boys are going to be hacking around the tarmac of the island this year, and one would hate for them to fall foul of Trafico. Were they to do so might cast a shadow over what otherwise should prove to be a very positive thing for Mallorca. Top Gear has not only a large audience in the UK, it is has a worldwide following. It all does rather depend, though, on how much coverage there is and of what. Meanwhile, "The Bulletin" says that, following its breaking of the news that Clarkson and his chums were on their way, the British community has been "thrown into a frenzy". Perhaps I am one of those because a frenzy means a state of mental derangement, and, along with all British expats, I am mentally deranged as a consequence of knowing that Jeremy Clarkson will be in Mallorca. Actually, this frenzy has been a "long list of people wishing to get involved". And you could just about have predicted it - all manner of bloody wannabes and hangers-on will be wishing to grab a piece of the action. The expat socialite set will be seeking to decamp from their normal places of vacuity for some photo ops with Jezza and co. Platinum blondes of wrinkly brownness tottering in a Barbara Windsor manner atop non-sensible twin towers of Jimmy Choo's accompanied by their husbands - the Blingmaster Flashes. I trust that Clarkson will bring with him his sharpest of pens.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Whitney Houston (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aiJ_2zQYUFg). Today's title - comes from what is considered one of his finest; he's a bossy sort and the song has a weather element.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Thursday, February 05, 2009
Murder On The Dancefloor
One Dakota, two Dakota, three Dakota, four.
Not yet five Dakota, six Dakota, seven Dakota, more, but is it just a malicious rumour going around town that Puerto Pollensa is to get a fourth Dakota Tex-Mex? What huge entertainment if it is. For this would bring forth (or maybe that's fourth) a great wailing and gnashing of teeth, as also would the news that the fish and chip shop was to turn into a Chinese, though, in all likelihood, a reallocation of an existing Chinese. It (The Codfather fish'n'chip shop, that is) has moved, by the way, to where the Ivy Garden was. Of course, fish and chip shops are ok, it would appear. No-one has ever seemed to moan that there is one, but it is hardly authentic, as in not being typically Mallorcan or some such, which is, of course, deemed to be the only sort of restaurant allowable in Puerto Pollensa (by many expats, that is). Tex-mexs's, an abundance of Chinese; these are not right, these ruin Puerto Pollensa, but a chippy on the other hand ... Oh well.
As for the fourth Dakota rumour, I know where it might be going, though of course it might just all be someone's vivid imagination and that the place in question will turn out to be nothing of the sort - or maybe another Burger King. Meantime, I'm not saying.
Two evenings ago, there was, apparently, a programme on some obscure channel about Mallorca. How dumb can TV get, do you suppose? How dumb can the people who watch this drivel get, do you suppose? I have a nightmare that hell is a constant loop of The Jeremy Kyle Show - tribes of Karen Matthews or those with brains the size of hers, faces to match and sitting in bars wearing ill-washed bras. Actually, I have seen a few like that here, wandering gormlessly along The Mile. The thing is we don't need Virgin Channel One, or whatever it was, to tell us that there are stupid and ugly people who come on holiday to Mallorca. If you missed the programme, and I certainly did, it was called "Sun Sea and A&E". My, what a hoot, must have thought the production company. Let's do a docu on some chavs kicking the crap out of each other, getting rat-arsed and ending up in the casualty departments of some Mallorcan hospitals - specifically in Son Dureta and the Muro hospital. The surprise is that they actually got to the A&E department at all. Normally, they skip that bit and go straight to the morgue having taken a quick dive from the hotel balcony. According to the website of the production company, the series - and yes there are seven more like this - ranges "from too much booze to too much sun; from accidents on the dancefloor to kids' catastrophes in the pool". At least there were only accidents on the dancefloor and not murder.
Better news is that the Top Gear laddos are to come for the Classic Car rally in March and do a show. This normally features a stage from Puerto Pollensa, with the starting-point in the nautical club, so this year, one imagines, it will be thronged with expats desperate to try and ingratiate themselves with the Top Gear trio. I would advise caution. Clarkson's vitriol would doubtless extend to mostly all expats. If I were you, I'd avoid the Top Gear-ists like the plague. Not that I don't like Clarkson; quite the opposite. And anyone who has seen fit to punch Piers Morgan is fine by me. One trusts that the programme will show some suitably pleasant landscapes and be a rather more positive representation of Mallorca than some Chardonnay who has vomited over a nurse in Muro hospital A&E. Oh, and if you think Clarkson might go easy on the local expattery, do be warned: remember he once said that anyone who had moved to Spain had held up a post office. And I daresay he's had time to work on that particular theme and to come up with something of equivalent hostility to Alexei Sayle's one-time character assassination of Leapy Lee and rubbishing of the Costa expat. Here's hoping.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - The Clash (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=trolcS3V7dY). Today - this was just so good.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Not yet five Dakota, six Dakota, seven Dakota, more, but is it just a malicious rumour going around town that Puerto Pollensa is to get a fourth Dakota Tex-Mex? What huge entertainment if it is. For this would bring forth (or maybe that's fourth) a great wailing and gnashing of teeth, as also would the news that the fish and chip shop was to turn into a Chinese, though, in all likelihood, a reallocation of an existing Chinese. It (The Codfather fish'n'chip shop, that is) has moved, by the way, to where the Ivy Garden was. Of course, fish and chip shops are ok, it would appear. No-one has ever seemed to moan that there is one, but it is hardly authentic, as in not being typically Mallorcan or some such, which is, of course, deemed to be the only sort of restaurant allowable in Puerto Pollensa (by many expats, that is). Tex-mexs's, an abundance of Chinese; these are not right, these ruin Puerto Pollensa, but a chippy on the other hand ... Oh well.
As for the fourth Dakota rumour, I know where it might be going, though of course it might just all be someone's vivid imagination and that the place in question will turn out to be nothing of the sort - or maybe another Burger King. Meantime, I'm not saying.
Two evenings ago, there was, apparently, a programme on some obscure channel about Mallorca. How dumb can TV get, do you suppose? How dumb can the people who watch this drivel get, do you suppose? I have a nightmare that hell is a constant loop of The Jeremy Kyle Show - tribes of Karen Matthews or those with brains the size of hers, faces to match and sitting in bars wearing ill-washed bras. Actually, I have seen a few like that here, wandering gormlessly along The Mile. The thing is we don't need Virgin Channel One, or whatever it was, to tell us that there are stupid and ugly people who come on holiday to Mallorca. If you missed the programme, and I certainly did, it was called "Sun Sea and A&E". My, what a hoot, must have thought the production company. Let's do a docu on some chavs kicking the crap out of each other, getting rat-arsed and ending up in the casualty departments of some Mallorcan hospitals - specifically in Son Dureta and the Muro hospital. The surprise is that they actually got to the A&E department at all. Normally, they skip that bit and go straight to the morgue having taken a quick dive from the hotel balcony. According to the website of the production company, the series - and yes there are seven more like this - ranges "from too much booze to too much sun; from accidents on the dancefloor to kids' catastrophes in the pool". At least there were only accidents on the dancefloor and not murder.
Better news is that the Top Gear laddos are to come for the Classic Car rally in March and do a show. This normally features a stage from Puerto Pollensa, with the starting-point in the nautical club, so this year, one imagines, it will be thronged with expats desperate to try and ingratiate themselves with the Top Gear trio. I would advise caution. Clarkson's vitriol would doubtless extend to mostly all expats. If I were you, I'd avoid the Top Gear-ists like the plague. Not that I don't like Clarkson; quite the opposite. And anyone who has seen fit to punch Piers Morgan is fine by me. One trusts that the programme will show some suitably pleasant landscapes and be a rather more positive representation of Mallorca than some Chardonnay who has vomited over a nurse in Muro hospital A&E. Oh, and if you think Clarkson might go easy on the local expattery, do be warned: remember he once said that anyone who had moved to Spain had held up a post office. And I daresay he's had time to work on that particular theme and to come up with something of equivalent hostility to Alexei Sayle's one-time character assassination of Leapy Lee and rubbishing of the Costa expat. Here's hoping.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - The Clash (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=trolcS3V7dY). Today - this was just so good.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
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