Come Fly With Me - Or Not

Come fly with me. Just as I get an email about the Sinatra show and its lift-off for the coming season, so I also hear about flights grounded. Or rather, flights not flying. Don't fly with me.

The availability of flights has been an issue throughout the winter. There have been fewer flights and what there have been have not always been as convenient as previously. Stansted with Ryanair. I'd rather not have, but that was how it was. "The problem's the lack of flights. Look, there's hardly anyone walking past." I did look. The street outside the estate agency in Pollensa. No, I suppose there weren't that many people walking past. And the problem is, even at the luxury end of the property market (which is the end occupied by this particular estate agency), that the lack of flights means less potential for sales. The luxury end, which is meant to have remained buoyant. "Mike Oldfield has dropped the price of his place by a million," I say. Might not be representative of the market, they say. The celebs whack on a premium in the belief that someone will pay it in order to wallow in the reflected kudos. Casa Tubular Bells. Getting an extra million for your gaff. Like chasing moonlight shadows. At another agency at the luxury, luxury end of the market, there are a number of showings. I guess a number of showings is a euphemism.

Having been told about the sorry state of the airline industry, I find further support in "The Bulletin". "Majorca pays the price for a lack of flights," it front pages. Easter may not be that good if there aren't the flights. The paper's got its tourism insider at it again. The chap from Cosmos etc. etc. Talk about downbeat. Talk also about what we knew wouldn't be the case and the bleeding obvious. What did we know wouldn't be the case? That all the hotels in Mallorca would be open on 1 April. Thus reckoned the head of the hotel federation some while back. It was a daft statement, an April Fool. It was never going to happen. And isn't.

What do we know that is the bleeding obvious? That there will be a hiatus between Easter and when the season really kicks in some time in May. Hence, hotels - and airlines - schedule accordingly. We know all this. Why should it even be worthy of comment? Because someone - the hoteliers' boss - made the statement. And it seemed to be taken as fact. By some. Not by me. You just had to ask one or two hotels to get the answer and paint a more accurate picture. The press though. Ah yes, the press, as in The Bulletin. Never seems to question the statements. Taken as fact. And then there's the promotion. The tourism promotion for the islands. The Rafael Nadal adverts. They have not been screened in the UK and Germany. We know all this. And we know why the ads haven't been screened. Because of the upheavals at the tourism ministry and because one of the various tourism ministers, Ferrer, seemed to want to cut costs.

Just like Sky can put up some dolt of a footballer to say nothing or to say the bleeding obvious with no insight or no originality - and presumably pay handsomely - so the default position of the press is to front up with a so-called "name", be it the head of a tourism organisation or company, who offers a similar lack of originality or lack of anything challenging or controversial. It's mediocre. At best.

Tourism insiding. Same old, same old. The press's treatment is as depressingly familiar, repetitious, undemanding as the messages themselves can be depressing. But wait. This does not accord with other messages. That some hotels are reporting almost solid bookings through the season - already; that some businesses are feeling very optimistic and are going for new approaches and new ideas. I feel that old song by Allan Sherman coming on. "Camp Granada." The depressing refrain of "take me home, oh muddah, fadduh". Then suddenly, guys are swimming, guys are sailing. It's never as bad as you think, everyone, or as the press might portray it, or as depressingly familiar, repetitious and undemanding as the treatment.

Kindly disregard this letter.


Captain Chris Mackintosh
I'm extremely grateful to John Maclean for sending an obituary for a friend, someone who was well-known to many in Alcúdia. Captain Chris has died suddenly. I'm holding the obit back as it will go into "Talk Of The North" next week. But thanks, John, and for the lovely touch at the end:

"Farewell, my friend and fair winds. Fair winds."


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.