You could have cut the excitement with a sledgehammer. Could you see the end of the third stage of the Tour of Mallorca cycle race in Puerto Alcúdia? Barely. Get a slightly wrong position a bit away from the actual finish line, and all the hanging around for half an hour was utterly pointless. To be honest, it was all pretty pointless. Except that is the presentations. These are by far the most entertaining part of the event, a photo opportunity for various worthies, the totty from Coke and the local town hall to get its name in the picture. Sadly, I had wandered off and was admiring some scrubland when Alcúdia’s mayor got onto the podium to have some flowers waved over his head. Disappointing not just for me, but also for you and no doubt him as he does not therefore feature on today’s photo montage. But he can always see himself in tomorrow’s newspapers which will devote a whole page similar to the two podium shots here, replete with happy winners, people you have never heard of and are even less interested in, adverts for Coca-Cola and Air Europa and most importantly the bags of the Coke girls.
Just what do they have in those bags? They seemed pretty weighty. A passing resident of many years suggested a clean pair of knickers, but it looked more like a couple of house-bricks. Don’t know why they would want those. Maybe they had six packs of Coke. Who knows? But guessing as to the contents was about as good as it got, unless you add the additional questions of what dance is one of the “winners” performing, how do you actually get to be a Coke girl, and why are cycling events like primary-school sports days – a prize for everyone? Everyone wins, it seems, or at least gets a bunch of flowers. The main sprint over, some guy gets his cup, you wander off and wonder why the Guardia need to look quite so unhappy, and, damn me, some other bloke’s getting his delivery from Interflora. Couldn’t be anything to do with all those photos with names of fizzy drinks and an airline present. Of course not. We all stand together and have our photos taken.
Just what do they have in those bags? They seemed pretty weighty. A passing resident of many years suggested a clean pair of knickers, but it looked more like a couple of house-bricks. Don’t know why they would want those. Maybe they had six packs of Coke. Who knows? But guessing as to the contents was about as good as it got, unless you add the additional questions of what dance is one of the “winners” performing, how do you actually get to be a Coke girl, and why are cycling events like primary-school sports days – a prize for everyone? Everyone wins, it seems, or at least gets a bunch of flowers. The main sprint over, some guy gets his cup, you wander off and wonder why the Guardia need to look quite so unhappy, and, damn me, some other bloke’s getting his delivery from Interflora. Couldn’t be anything to do with all those photos with names of fizzy drinks and an airline present. Of course not. We all stand together and have our photos taken.
QUIZ
Yesterday – Spiritualized. Today’s title – who? Easy.
Yesterday – Spiritualized. Today’s title – who? Easy.
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