I’ll Come Drivin’

… “Fast as wheels can turn”. The somewhat orgasmic lyric that introduces this piece might aptly apply to the climactic impetus of much of Mallorca’s driving. It is essentially wham bam, there is little by way of Taoist prolongation, just the arousal in getting from A to Z in as short a period of time as possible and in an aggressive manner as possible. Some like it rough and their cars are treated in a similar way.

“The Bulletin” reports on a recent demonstration of the art of “northern-style” driving. Commercial drivers in Mallorca, such as taxi drivers, have been shown that the apparently smoother way in which northern European drivers handle their cars saves fuel and keeps the cars in better nick to boot. The “latin” way guzzles gas, wrecks gearboxes and, one might add, puts mostly everyone in peril.

I once took my car out with the woman who ran the garage where it was serviced. I thought there might be a problem so we drove off so she could assess it. Whilst we were motoring along, she said to me that I drove “smoothly”. She made precisely the point that this demonstration has been attempting to get across. It had never occurred to me that I drove in a particular way.

One doubts whether the northern style would ever be adopted on a wider scale here, even with the message that it could save some euros of petrol. It is not as if the whole of northern Europe drives in the style that is being suggested. Ever driven in Germany at 200 kph on an autobahn? Ever driven around London (before the congestion charge)?

There is another way of changing driver habits, and that is road layout. The changes to the Carretera Arta in Alcúdia may have been designed with more accidents in mind, but – to everyone’s surprise (mine included) – they do seem to have worked, even if I still have my doubts about the roundabouts (largely because no one seems to know how to negotiate them). The central islands and the roundabouts are now emerging further along the road in Playa de Muro going towards Can Picafort. Whereas the new layout in Alcúdia seemed questionable, in Playa de Muro – on the stretch from the bridge to Can Picafort – it is not. This is a blackspot. Traffic goes way too fast. I have mentioned the flowers by the roadside before. So the introduction of speed-calming measures is a good thing. The problem is when you get a bit of extreme “latin” driving at 140 or so that doesn’t know about the new layout, and …


QUIZ
Yesterday – Junior Murvin recorded it originally and co-wrote it, though The Clash popularised it. Today’s title – and the first line of the piece. Which duo who went drum ‘n’ bass?

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