Well, it isn't all bad news, you know. There was a headline in one Spanish paper this week which read "Bookings to Magalluf soar". Yep, you could have put money on it, though one can guess which niche of the British tourist market will be doing the soaring. One somewhat larger niche, the great family market, will surely be doing all it can to avoid having to fess up to relatives, friends, neighbours and hairdressers that it is off to the M-place in sunny Spain. "Going anywhere nice on your holidays?" "Erm, yes, erm, Mag ..." "Sorry, where did you say?" God, the stigma of it all. It's like admitting going on holiday to a nudist resort. Or Skegness.
There is one family, though, which appeared to have been having second thoughts. Letizia was browsing the net for likely holiday destinations when suddenly up popped a short video she hadn't been expecting. "Right, that's it. We're not going to THAT place." Anyway, a sort of bidding war then broke out between Mallorca and Almeria to see which one could ensure the summer holidaying patronage of Felipe, Tizzy and the kids. And if the Costa Almeria (the original Costa del Sol, if you didn't know) were to have won out, what then of the Marivent? It's not as if you can have a damn great palace sitting idle all summer. Perhaps they'd thought of offering it to Carnage and suggesting they added it to the bar crawl itinerary. But it did of course all turn out all right in the end for Mallorca. Put to a family vote, the kids sided with dad. Never mind, Tizzy, there's always next year.
It's not just the royals who have been anxious about being stigmatised with being within several kilometres of the M-place. Mallorca's own royalty, the boy Nadal, has turned his back on the island, too. What an ingrate. No sooner had the Council of Mallorca said that it was putting him up for an "illustrious son" award for being such a splendid ambassador for Mallorca than the illustrious son cleared off to Ibiza on his jollies. Who next? Who else can we expect to say no to Majorca rather than face the stigma-by-association of the M-place? If White Dee says no, then we really know we're in trouble. Mind you, there is always Jeremy Kyle. As they say in short-message social media land: ffs.
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