Birdland - Cycling and bird-watching in Mallorca

Come on, 'fess up. Cyclists behaving badly or even behaving well, and do you lose your rag, shout and scream? Does Matthew Parris's piano wire cross your mind? What if maybe I just give a little nudge with the bumper? No, no, don't do that. Whatever you do, don't do that.

Me? I move from ultra polite to ultra pissed off. I will gladly observe the rules, gladly let a line of cyclists enter a roundabout, the only time you are meant to stop on a roundabout. I will even let a lone cyclist come onto a roundabout in front of me, so long as there isn't a truck about to demolish my boot. I will happily give a wide berth, slow at the central islands where there isn't sufficient space for car and two-abreast cyclists, even if they are meant to be in single file. I will do all these things. I don't suffer from road territorialism. It isn't that. What it is, is when the rules are broken, when the cyclists do what no car driver could get away with - running a red, coming out of an exit that they shouldn't be, cutting up, or just going the wrong way. But why get so peed off? Does it really matter? Well actually it does, given that the car driver is invariably always at fault if there's an accident.

The recreational cyclist is not the issue. He or she usually pedals at a sedate speed. He or she can stop easily. It is the pros, the semi-pros, the pretend-pros who get the driver's goat. The ones who act as they own the roads. Ah yes, own. It's that territorialism again. And it's also the provocation, the one that comes from the attire, the dress-code, the lycra. They dress deliberately to antagonise.

But it's not just on the roads of Alcúdia, Pollensa or Muro that the great cyclist-driver divide occurs. In Dublin, according to a piece in yesterday's "Sunday Times", "cyclists are facing a backlash from motorists and pedestrians who claim they are a menace". The paper reveals police figures for transgressions - 1,847 motorists done for going through a red, 28 cyclists for doing the same. Strangely enough, given the lunatic nature of the Mallorcan driver, I have rarely actually witnessed a driver running a red. I couldn't tell you how many cyclists I've seen doing the same. What I can tell you is how often I've seen Trafico dealing with an errant cyclist. Once. A girl went through a red right in front of the patrol vehicle. They could hardly not stop her. But whereas a driver can be easily identified, a cyclist cannot be. They all look the same, all stretched into blue outfits. There may be sponsors' logos, different colour helmets and so on, but you can't really pick a cyclist out. And that's it, the cyclist knows damn well that he or she can get away with it. It's this that hacks the drivers off.


Bird-watching in Mallorca
"The Bulletin" ran a piece yesterday about a book that has been published, in English, which highlights the rich bird life to be found on the island. It is called the "Birding Tourist's Guide to Majorca". Three lucky readers may well have emailed the paper to win a copy in response to the question "which red-breasted bird from northern Europe is starting to breed in Mallorca?" Hmm, let me think, bird, red breast. Is it a blackbird?

The robin is just one bird that is now laying down roots in Mallorca. So also is the little egret and the hoopoe. The Albufera nature park is home to them, as it is to many other birds, migrant or relatively full-time. Bird-watching is something of a growth tourism market and a not unlucrative one. As one of the book's authors points out, bird-watchers spend a fair amount of dosh on twitching kit and they are "relatively big spenders", like other tourists who splash out on specialist equipment and clothing, such as golfers or - dare one say it - cyclists.

The book is all part of an initiative to grow this tourism market further. It's a good idea, a very good idea. Now all that's needed is a tourism minister and someone in charge of tourism promotion.


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Pet Shop Boys and Dusty Springfield, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IZip7Y_IDqQ. Today's title - "Birdland", probably the best-known thing done by one of the most important of jazz fusion bands.

Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.