Getting Angry In Puerto Pollensa

People have been getting angry in Puerto Pollensa. People are signing petitions, people are falling out, people are arranging demonstrations. It seems like 2010 all over again, when the people took to the streets and when the then mayor, Joan Cerdà, was all but barricaded inside the one-time municipal building.

The hopeless pedestrianisation pilot scheme of the Cerdà administration - abandoned by the time the 2010 protest took place at the start of June that year - was just one ingredient that went into a whole menu of complaints directed at the town hall. The actual scheme, the one being worked on at present, has once more put the town hall in the firing line but it has also, as has been revealed on social media, driven something of a wedge between people.

Then there are the charges that the town hall has had to respond to that the new pavements do not permit accessibility for wheelchairs (or indeed baby buggies and any other form of wheeled device). A levelling-off that will allow smooth accessibility will not be done until the second phase this winter. In the meantime, says the town hall, temporary solutions will be adopted that allow for wheelchair use.

Anyway, at 11am on Monday there is to be a form of protest to highlight the difficulties posed at present for wheelchair, mobility and buggy users.

Slightly ironic in light of the other reason for anger is the meeting place for this protest. It will be in front of Gran Café 1919, the establishment by the yacht club roundabout that found itself at the centre of the most colossal row that broke out last weekend. While the falling-out over the pedestrianisation might have appeared somewhat personal at times, that was nothing compared to this controversy. It is highly personal.

To cut to the chase, this involves the ice-cream kiosk of Gelats Valls in front of Gran Café 1919. The kiosk has been there and been operated by the Valls family since the 1960s. It is, say many, emblematic, a part of the Puerto Pollensa furniture. However, a 2015 town hall decision made it clear that as the kiosk is on the public way there has to be a tender for its operation. The Valls family were informed of this and told that the kiosk could not re-open this year, subject to the tender process being initiated and completed. It has re-opened.

The family says that there was once an award for the kiosk for a period of 99 years or until such a time as the families (Valls and Martorells) ceased to be involved in the ice-cream business. A problem with this is that no one can find the documentary evidence.

The town hall had been going through a process of annual reconfirmation of the kiosk's activities, but in September 2014 it received a communication from Café Capuchino 1919 SL, the company under which Gran Café 1919 trades. This was essentially a request for the town hall to consider the occupation of the public way by the kiosk. The communication also suggested that the kiosk represented an invasion of space authorised or authorisable for use by the cafe. It would appear that it was this which resulted in the town hall decision of May 2015 that the authorisation to Valls would cease at the end of the year and that the space would revert to the town hall, which would place the kiosk up for tender.

The story of this is, on the one hand, a story of nostalgia and of the rights of the small, family business. Everyone, tourist and resident alike, seems to have their own story and recollection of the kiosk, the ice-cream and the founders. On the other, it is a story of what can only be described as resentment directed at a bigger business concern. Gran Café 1919 is just one establishment which ultimately belongs to Grupo Boulevard.

There is a good deal of history in Puerto Pollensa concerning Boulevard, and all this old resentment burst out because of the Valls affair. Some of what has been expressed on social media, directed at Boulevard and at its owner, borders on the libellous, as do some observations made about the town hall. In some ways, it has become a story of classic smalltown politics and business, replete with rivalries and hostilities. In others, it is just about people, some with long memories of holidays and residence, sticking up for a well-loved ice-cream kiosk which seems to be a victim.

Emotions have been allowed to run high. Rather too high. The pedestrianisation works, admittedly a less than satisfactorily managed project, will cease soon enough, and hopefully the ill-feeling will cease as well. As for the ice-cream kiosk, perhaps a hope that the town hall had expressed for a "satisfactory and amicable solution" prior to the kiosk having re-opened might yet be found.

A Traffic System That's Taken Fifty Years

As Puerto Pollensa's first phase of semi-pedestrianisation heads towards completion - hopefully by 4 May, and yes, there is another phase to come, so be warned - thoughts naturally turn to the traffic system. Well, you would think that the two would be considered together, which they probably have been, but only now has the master plan been unveiled, insofar as it represents anything that hadn't already been said.

They've been talking about the traffic system for as long as they have pedestrianisation, so the two have formed part of the same package and have done so ever since the late 1960s: things move slowly here, we know that. Rather more recently - late 2008 - there was to have been a grand "mobility" plan (i.e. traffic plan) for Puerto Pollensa. The then mayor, Joan Cerdà, said so. And it was to be agreed through "general consensus", something that was seemingly absent when Joan had gone full steam ahead with the original pedestrianisation plan and its lamentable pilot scheme (abandoned after a few weeks).

The mobility plan, the impression was given, was to have been one for the whole of Puerto Pollensa, which sounded reasonable enough. Some time later, still during Joan's reign, a plan was being cobbled together. If I remember rightly, it was the work of a relative (son, nephew or someone or other) of the then town hall delegate for Puerto Pollensa. Questions were asked, as you might have expected. We heard very little more.

And so now to the consultancy company which has apparently been working on mobility since April 2013. Its plan is? Well, basically what we knew. Two-way traffic as far the Llenaire avenue coming from Alcudia and then one-way into the port and up to the yacht club roundabout. (The plan refers to the Plaça Enginyer Gabriel Roca, of which no one has heard but which may or may not be in front of 1919. Who can say for sure? So-called squares with names pop up in every town without anyone having the slightest idea where they are.)

What more do we learn? There will be a speed limit of 40kph coming into Puerto Pollensa as far as the Llenaire avenue, then it'll become 30kph as far as the Paris avenue and then it'll be 20kph up to the Plaça Enginyer Gabriel Roca (let's stick to the yacht club roundabout).

And that is pretty much it. A fine recipe for speeding tickets quite possibly, but within the plan there is very little about parking. It will be on one side of the coast semi-pedestrianised road up to the Paris avenue (which we also knew). But where else will cars park? It still sounds like a flaw in the whole scheme, if parking is pushed further and further from the beach.

MALLORCA TODAY - Traffic changes of direction as part of Puerto Pollensa pedestrianisation opposed

Nadal Moragues, the councillor from the UMP (Unió Mollera Pollencina), the party which represents Puerto Pollensa, has rejected the notion of the direction of one-way traffic changing under plans for the semi-pedestrianisation of the resort's coastal road. He says that this would only lead to driver confusion.

See more: Diario de Mallorca

MALLORCA TODAY - Puerto Pollensa pedestrianisation scheme has yet to get government backing

The semi-pedestrianisation scheme in Puerto Pollensa will now cost Pollensa town hall up to 800,000 euros with the Council of Mallorca and the regional government paying 900,000 euros between them. However, an agreement has yet to be drawn up with the government's tourism ministry and the project appears unlikely to be into effect for two years.

See more: Diario de Mallorca

MALLORCA TODAY - Puerto Pollensa pedestrianisation will cost 1.5 million euros

The pedestrianisation of the coast road in Puerto Pollensa between the yacht club roundabout and Llenaire will cost 1.5 million euros. The regional government will contribute 600,000 euros and the Council of Mallorca 200,000. Pollensa town hall has allocated an initial 150,000 euros that will need to rise. The exact nature of the pedestrianisation has, as yet, to be fully decided upon but it is thought that it will result in a one-way traffic system (traffic from Alcúdia coming into the port). The announcement regarding the pedestrianisation has been made as the town hall has now finally been able to agree its budgets for this year, support having been given to Mayor Cifre's PP from different opposition parties, including the UMP, who blocked the budgets in April.

See more: Ultima Hora

MALLORCA TODAY - Puerto Pollensa's paid parking starts in June

Slightly delayed from the previously announced mid-May starting-point, paid parking will return to Puerto Pollensa from the start of June, the delay having been as a result of negotiations with the ports authority over the parking spaces near to the nautical club. These will be ceded to the town hall and its contractor in return for a percentage of the tariffs. Some 40% of street parking spaces will be included in the paid-parking scheme - from La Gola to the Bocchoris area and including the front and roads such as Joan XXIII. The green zone for residents' parking will, as previously announced, not come in until next year. For the regular blue zone, coming back in June, the rate will be a minimum of 50 cents up to a maximum of two euros, which will also determine a maximum length of parking time.

Meanwhile, the plan to partially pedestrianise the front is likely to be implemented in 2013, following an agreement struck between the town hall and the Council of Mallorca, assuming there is money to facilitate the scheme, which would result in the creation of a one-way traffic system.

MALLORCA TODAY - Puerto Pollensa pedestrianisation returns

Bad memories of the aborted attempt to pedestrianise the front line in Puerto Pollensa may have been aroused by the news that Pollensa town hall is seeking an agreement with the Council of Mallorca regarding a new project to pedestrianise the coast road from Llenaire into the port. However, there is a big difference this time that might allay the concerns expressed last time. Under this scheme, and it follows what mayor Tomeu Cifre said in response to a question I asked of him at a meeting of English-speaking residents last year, it would be only a partial pedestrianisation, with a one-way traffic system into the port from the Alcúdia direction being maintained.

See more: Ultima Hora

A Bad Start

I suppose the last thing you hope for, when things appear a tad gloomy, is that someone, a tourist, loses his life as the consequence of a street brawl. But that is what has happened in Puerto Alcúdia. I don't wish to go into the circumstances of the incident - it has been reported in the press, for example in "The Daily Mail" as well as locally - but it should be emphasised that this can happen anywhere. It's a facile thing to say, but it is the case. Let's not even begin to characterise this as an "Alcúdia problem", because it is not. It's very sad that it has occurred, and that's the extent of it.


In looking to boost the tourism season, the Balearic Government's Minister for Tourism, Miquel Nadal, is investing four million euros for promotions in the key Spanish and British markets. Well, not the minister personally, but the government. This announcement seems a little curious. Curious because I was under the impression it was always meant to happen. I'm not sure why quite a splash is being made of it, this "it" including his tennis-playing namesake appearing in TV ads and a special push being made in Manchester. A few months ago, it was said that Manchester would be a particular target. There will be a "show" which shows off everything good about the Balearics - from food to recreational activities - similar to ones that have already taken place in Madrid and Berlin. This show will run for three days from 1 May. First of May. Isn't this a little late? Maybe not. And hopefully not. But does a "show" in the centre of one city make a huge difference? Seems a bit unlikely, but as they've done them in the other cities maybe they have had an effect. I can't help feeling that for all the promotion, on TV or elsewhere, with Rafa Nadal or not, that right now the thing which would have most impact would be significant price incentives. General advertising of the Balearics-have-all-these-wonderful-things-to-do nature is a longer-term style of brand promotion. What is needed is some blatant short-termism. Price, price and more price.


More on the U-turn over the Puerto Pollensa pedestrianisation. You will now be able to do a U-turn if you wish to and be able, once again, to go in both directions. The other U-turn, that by the town hall, was not "linked", says the transport consortium, to its report (according to "The Diario"). The consortium, which is a kind of quango I suppose, goes on to say that it was willing to "study and negotiate" in respect of the siting of bus stops, which was cited as the reason for the abandonment of the pedestrianisation project. Whatever. I'm not sure that anyone much cares whether it was linked or it wasn't. The town hall is for turning, and many will be pleased that it is.


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - MGMT (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVnRzEjpUmE). No question today. Doesn't seem appropriate.

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Nobody Expects The Catalan Imposition

Certain issues are still rumbling on - Clarkson and Catalan. Not the two of them together - God forbid - but the ongoing coverage of Jeremy's distaste for expats and the "Catalan imposition" in the English media suggests that they are either subjects of burning interest or those which have caught the interest of a vocal but small minority within the expat community. Clarkson is a matter of passing note, but the Catalan thing is most certainly not - "nobody expects the Catalan imposition; Biggles, the comfy chair". *

To what extent, though, should the Catalan thing be an issue for the Brits? It's not our language, so how can it be our debate? Insofar as officialdom works in that language alone, sometimes in contravention to the law which demands that both Catalan and Castilian are used, and insofar as the priority given to Catalan affects education, then it is an issue for many. But I don't know that I am alone in thinking that it isn't really my debate, or that of any other Brit, except in the sense of it being a genuinely interesting social-political-historical phenomenon.

It is too easy to seek to nuance this debate in ways that will chime with the British, as in, for example, comparing the Catalan situation with Welsh or Cornish. Such a comparison is wrong-headed. Catalan was and still is a genuine European language. It contributed significantly to European development until it was effectively granted second-language status through the Castile-Aragon union and the elevation to supremacy of Castilian as the language of nation, commerce and empire. And so it has been ever since, subject also to fascistic diktat that saw it proscribed. But it survived as a significant language. Because it did not acquire international status, unlike Castilian, is no reason to suggest its unimportance. Swedish is not an international language either, but no-one is proposing the Swedes give it up, and there are roughly the same number of Swedish speakers as there are Catalan speakers.

With the exception of Belgium, an arguably artificial construct in any event (if any country can be considered not to be artificial), nowhere else in western Europe is there a linguistic argument that compares as a political and social issue. For this reason, it is fascinating to observe and, for the most part, that it is what one has to do. The "Catalan imposition" may seem idiotic and politically motivated (I prefer to call it impractical, though I did say idiotic the other day), but unless one is a Catalan native speaker, I suspect one cannot understand fully the significance of the discussion. One is not of course suggesting that it is on anything like the same scale, but there remains the irony that Catalan, forcibly banned by Franco, should now be the tool for an imposition in reverse.


And that open road ...
It seemed just like the old days, not that those days are actually that old; only some six months old. For no other reason than it was there, I drove along the coast road as far as the Club Náutica roundabout in Puerto Pollensa, went round it and came back. Yep, the pedestrianisation experiment is truly over. But as I was coming back towards Alcúdia, it struck me that it would have been a damn good idea to have kept it in place. One forgets, quite quickly, the extent to which cyclists, people wandering in the middle of the road, vehicles parked up onto the kerbs can make the stretch in the port itself a nightmare to drive along. Bring it back!


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Gary Barlow (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5dpHSeIZAI). Today's title - and this is a play on? * Before you mail me, it wasn't Biggles who was instructed to fetch the comfy chair.

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Open Road

Hey ho, what do you know? All that air, most of it hot, all those column inches, all those protests, all those threats of legal action for this and that, and ... the pedestrianisation of the Puerto Pollensa frontline has been called off. Damn. That's put an end to all the fun.

It was probably always the case that it was going to require some impulse that allowed for some face-saving, and that is what has been forthcoming - in the form of objections from public transport interests. These were rarely given much of an airing - hot or not - when the issue first raised the hackles back in the autumn. Surprising perhaps that they seemed not to have been given much consideration or indeed column inches, but it is they that have seemingly led to the change of heart at the town hall which introduced what was always only a trial, it must be remembered, but which caused such an unnecessary fuss owing to a lack of consultation. They (the town hall that is) say they will now look at the whole issue as part of a wider plan for the port, but for now, it's over, and traffic can move in both directions. The key to the abandonment is the fact that the relocation of bus stops would be highly inconvenient. I guess we can also forget the idea that the bus "station", such as it is, the one by the entrance to the Club Náutica, will now not be moving either.

There was also the not insignificant factor of the local police, the head of which had recommended that the road be opened not just in one direction, which had occurred, but in both, a radical proposal for a road with two lanes, I'm sure you'll agree. So, joy all around one supposes and this brings an "end to a botched job" on behalf of the town hall government, or so says the Alternative, i.e. the one-man United Left, who has been a constant critic of the scheme. (Quote in translation from the report in "The Diario".)


Boats and cuttlefish
There had been any number of fingers being crossed this past week. The dire weather, and there were deluges on Friday, had threatened to wash out the spring fair in Puerto Alcúdia - the boat and cuttlefish do. There is a God after all. Well, actually, there isn't, but let's not go into that just at the moment.

The sepia sampling tent was well-thronged, as you might imagine. Anything involving food brings the locals in by the charabanc-load, and today will require convoys to haul in those after some nosebag. It's good to see that people's priorities lie with their stomachs as, away from the scoff, the boat show was a little on the slow side. It was not, though, just a man and his dog, but a man, two women and two dogs - as you can see. But the Saturday is never that busy; today will be packed.


No Frills - new offices
Just a note to say that No Frills Excursions' new offices are now open. In addition to the old one in Avda. Playa in the port, there are two more direct No Frills' outlets in Puerto Alcúdia - one along The Mile, the other opposite the Astoria Playa hotel. There's some credit-crunch busting also - see the WHAT'S ON BLOG - http://www.wotzupnorth.blogspot.com - for details of this and the early April programme, football included.


And yesterday's quote was from, of course, Jezza Clarkson - HIGNFY http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mZEnfUDVxTs


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - The Turtles (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gfuRz1w_8ss).



Today's title - from the solo phase, which just went to prove that it is often better to stay in a group.

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Sitting Here On The Bench

Well, it all seemed to be kicking off in Puerto Pollensa's market square yesterday morning. I say kicking off; that is a bit of an exaggeration. But were it Easter already, there would be some unhappy Easter bunnies among the restaurant and bar owners. It's all to do with how much, or how many. Metres. Metres of terrace. It is not a new story in that restrictions have been anticipated for some while, but a by-law was passed last month which stipulated that terraces could be no deeper than 3.4 metres. Why 3.4 and not 3.5 I don't know, but that - apparently - is how far the tables and chairs of the establishments in the square can stretch. 3.5 metres are not very much, and - from a tourism and business point of view - it sucks; sorry, they suck. The owners can appeal, and have. Just as well; the last day of appeal is 24 March. As far as I am aware, this is just something that applies to the square, though it seems that - buried in the town hall - is a document which shows how far terraces can go, even for places that don't currently have them. Whatever. Anyway, the mayor was there in person, flanked by the local plod, while the traders put forward their case. I can't believe that this will not be challenged and overturned. An argument is that, because the tables stretch right across the pavement, they prevent people from sitting on the benches. Maybe so. In which case, why do they allow the market to take place? It may only be one morning, but the same problem applies. Why not move the benches? If I had to guess, there would be more people, far more people wanting to sit at a table in the square to have a meal on a warm summer's eve than there would be those who want to sit on a bench.

You do wonder at times if town halls would rather just kill off the tourism industry. If they got rid of it, then they would get rid of a number of headaches. Of course, one other development in Puerto Pollensa which, so the spurious argument went, would be a benefit to tourism, was that of the pedestrianisation. It seems like a long time since that was mentioned here, but what I am hearing is that, as far as traffic restrictions are concerned, vehicles will be able to use the whole of the coast road into Puerto Pollensa coming from Alcúdia. What's the point of that? If today is anything to go on, there are vehicles currently coming from the other direction as well. But were the road to be made one-way, it would not be a pedestrianisation, so why bother? This was never about benefits to tourism; it was all about an obscure piece of road legislation dating back to 1967, which appears to have brought ruination to some businesses since the so-called and botched trial was started last autumn. It was always a pointless exercise, and now it seems even more so.


Take it easy - sitting on roundabouts
More on the latest tourist excursion - the island tour of roundabout furniture and art. Further nominations for the birds nest affair in front of the Parc Natural (11 March: Fat Albert Rotunda) include a tornado (if you can actually sculpt a tornado), while the roundabout at what were the traffic lights and junction in Las Gaviotas now boasts something which is quite clearly a deckchair. Actually, it's pretty good in a sort-of contemporary, robust, IKEA or perhaps Paco Muebles deckchair style, as opposed to a Bognor-beach-circa-1965 way. I shall take a photo and you will be able to see for yourselves. I wonder how much it costs to sit on? Perhaps it is an ironic statement regarding the beach wars in Playa de Muro these past few years; those to do with sun beds and so on. Hopefully though, no-one will see fit to slash the sculpture in the dead of night.


The best election
Yes, that is election. Thank God. They could have got the word wrong I guess, rather than just the wrong word. And they are? GC Hotels. I was checking through the Google map that I have done and it seems the link to what were the Almarsa hotels (Estrella de Mar, Coral de Mar etc.) is out of date: it diverts to GC Hotels. The thing is that when you go to that site, you are greeted with a legend which states "The best election". Now, the word "elección" can mean election or selection (choice). Clearly, they have picked the wrong possibility for translation. They shouldn't have. Please, no more of the oh well it's quite funny when foreigners make poor translations excuses. It is not funny. It is downright unprofessional. The hotels of Mallorca are meant to offer quality. And quality should exist in all aspects of their business, including translations. Poor.


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Daniel Bedingfield (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lxI2DEE_Nco). Today's title - line from a fabulous song from the '60s. Circa 1965 in fact: the British hit was by a well-known George.

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Being With You

BEING SPANISH - PART SEVEN (THE VERB "TO BE")

Catching up on the "being Spanish" series, I have had an email which does rather echo what I said about the Spanish "look" or rather its absence. John, damningly, characterises flats in both Alcúdia and Puerto Pollensa as looking "not unlike Soviet post-war architecture". Whatever one thinks of developments such as Taylor Woodrow's in Puerto Pollensa, at least it has a certain style. It may be wrong for the port; indeed it almost certainly is wrong in terms of being out of place, but there again, what is "in place". I'm damned if I know. And that just emphasises the lack of a coherent architectural story, which is at least partly the fault of planning with no theme. There is certainly nothing obviously "Spanish" about any of it. However, I come back to the starting-point of where actually one derives a perception of being Spanish from, and John seems to agree with me that it is, in part at any rate, one lifted from Hollywood. As such, it is not Spanish at all, but American Western or Mexican. The association is one of language made physical in the form of buildings. We attempt to translate this language into the local setting - in Mallorca - and find that it doesn't in fact translate.

There is another, very different notion of being Spanish, and that is one which would doubtless escape the attention of many holidaymakers and indeed some of those who have moved here from the UK. It is one of describing, if you like, one's or another's existence or that of a thing. Which all sounds deeply profound, but it is not. It is actually very simple, if you can call a basic of both Castilian and Catalan differentiating between types of "being" simple. The piece I wrote the other day about Ramón Socias (8 December: We're Only In It For The Money) had as its source an article from the "Diario de Mallorca" newspaper. Perhaps it goes to show how useful it can be to read local Spanish papers as there was a usage there that, as such, I had never seen expressed before. It was this: "La cuestión está en estar o ser, ser o estar". Ok, maybe it doesn't make initial sense, but this is not a "to be or not to be" soliloquy, it is a "to be or to be" question. How can that make sense? Perfectly well, when one appreciates that there are two states of "being" - one permanent (ser) and one temporary (estar). It's why one asks "cómo estás" and not cómo eres. You are not how you are all the time, therefore the temporary form applies. The context in which Socias was speaking was that of politicians and of their holding posts for finite periods. When one states one's profession or job, "ser" is used, as in, for instance, "soy profesor" (I'm a teacher - and, incidentally - you don't use the article for "a" in Spanish for this sort of thing). Socias is challenging not just the permanence of a political appointment but also the rule of language in that he would rather it were "estoy político" (as opposed to "estoy de político" as the "de" is used when a temporary assignment is referred to, as in, possibly, I'm working as a politician at the moment in Spain). English makes no such explicit a distinction, but the mere presence - in Spanish - of different meanings for the most fundamental of verbs creates a conflict between the static and the fluid; a conflict and therefore a nuance in the way of thinking and of being. Being Spanish, therefore, could be ser or estar. Perhaps it is the latter in some instances, and this might explain the elusiveness of being able to define this state of "being Spanish".

Highly philosophical, you'll no doubt agree, and probably complete bollocks, but I, for one, find it intriguing as to the way in which language can determine how different cultures perceive things.


Anyway, to matters less cerebral and to hoteliers in Palma who are hacked off with the tourist authorities and the town hall for not doing more to promote the city. Bookings are down, and so someone has to carry the can. It's an old and familiar theme, and could apply to other towns, but Palma is a special case because it is the capital, it is big and it does have a lot to commend it, except for the likes of its shopping hours. I am still to be convinced that people would make Palma a weekend-break destination for the purposes of doing some shopping, but it cannot help the city if everything pretty much closes down by Saturday lunchtime. It may not assist the rest of the island, certainly not the north, for a sizeable chunk of the tourism promotional budget to be spent on the capital, but one has to be realistic, especially when it comes to the winter. Palma is open (well until Saturday lunchtime) in a way that other places are not. At least, that is how it is argued. But it is inaccurate. Alcúdia and Pollensa may be quiet in winter, but they are far from closed down. Special case it may be, but winter promotion should be for the whole island and not just the capital. But on specific international promotion of Palma - and that for its excellent San Sebastian celebrations in January - I wonder what they are doing. After last January's event, there was an admission that more needed to be done to attract overseas visitors to something that is deserving of greater foreign interest. So, is it?

PUERTO POLLENSA - YET MORE PEDESTRIANISATION
And for the latest ... Now it's to be just the bit between the Calles Elcano (the road opposite the pier with restaurant Stay) and Temple Fielding (on the corner of which is Sail & Surf). Heavy traffic is going to all be diverted along the new road. Does this include coaches? Is Temple Fielding to be two-way traffic? Don't know. Meantime, the annual let's-rip-up-Puerto Pollensa scheme is to start in January, with the promenade (that part from the roundabout to the pinewalk which is of course pedestrianised) being dug up for drainage works. It will be finished by the middle of March. Oh no it won't. Oh yes it will. Oh no it won't. What a pantomime. But at least this may prevent that other annual event, namely the outpouring of sewage into the sea.


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Fine Young Cannibals with Jimmy Somerville (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRyAD9dMQ64). Today's title - boy oh boy, does this bring back memories; one of the smoochiest and most romantic of all Motown songs. But I'm not telling.

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I Want My Independence

One thing you can say about the whole Puerto Pollensa pedestrianisation fandango is that at least it is giving people an interest during the otherwise quiet months of the off-season. Maybe there should be an annual controversy to keep everyone occupied once the clocks go back.

Anyway, Garry Bonsall tells me that there is a proposal for one lane of the road to be closed, a compromise of sorts. Maybe this would work, maybe not. It seems to me you either have pedestrianisation or you don't, with restricted access for deliveries as a sop to businesses that might be affected if you do indeed have it. Different forms of arrangement, though sought by the mayor, are attempts at post-hoc rationalisation of the questionably rational, in that the key question is why the pedestrianisation was ever conceived in the first place. As mentioned the other day, you have to go back to the summer of love - 1967 - for the answer, as it was then that the original plan was established, together with that for the new road.

Mayor Cerdà, it would appear, is only following orders. Perhaps someone should point out to him that the Generalisimo has long been begging at St. Peter's Gate. It's not as though all bets were off after 1975, the new road being one of them. One can justify that on the basis that there was a degree of foresight in appreciating the sort of traffic levels that Puerto Pollensa would come to expect. But because a plan was created 41 years ago doesn't mean that it has to be executed. I am wondering whether that law of historic memory, the one designed to rid Spain of symbols of the Franco era, could also be applied to traffic projects drawn up during that time, though I suppose you would have to unbuild the new road if it were.

It is a nonsense to argue that a scheme dreamt up in the sixties automatically has to be applied. Back then, the Spanish Government could have done pretty much as it pleased with scant or little regard for whatever anyone thought. Just nail the decree to the forehead of a convenient passing peasant, and then bring in the bulldozers. Times change, most obviously in respect of the volume of the public voice, which takes us back to that European law on consultation. Projects can no longer be foisted onto a local community without attention being paid to its views, but the mayor failed to consult widely from the very outset. Even if it were not his duty to have done so - though developments suggest it was - there was a moral case for it. Rather than adopt a seemingly dogmatic stance, one formed with the support of a plan from El Caudillo's time, he should have thrown it open as a full debate, not just about the pedestrianisation but about a scheme for the town as a whole. The closure of the frontline road is a piecemeal solution to a much wider problem - that of the infrastructure and quality of life of all of Puerto Pollensa. But he didn't, and now he's copping the flak.

Garry also tells me that there is an idea doing the rounds for a vice-mayor for the port. This shouldn't be necessary. A mayor should be for the whole town or not at all, and heaven alone knows what conflict this might give rise to, especially if they were from different political parties. But it is a measure of the apparent impotence of officials responsible for the port and of dissatisfaction with the administration that this is being advanced. For God's sake, this is a town that cannot muster 20,000 inhabitants. How much officialdom does one need? Yet there exists within this proposal the evidence of tensions and resentment between the port and the "pueblo". Pollensa is not the only town to suffer from this. Consider the four municipalities that comprise the tourism zone of the north - Pollensa, Alcúdia, Muro and Santa Margalida - and in only one case, that of Alcúdia, might it be said that the resort and the old town enjoy a degree of harmony. It is no coincidence that there is little or no physical separation between Alcúdia and Puerto Alcúdia. In the other three cases, there is not just the distance of kilometres, there is a distance also in administrative and psychological terms. In Santa Margalida such is the level of dysfunctionality that the opposition on the town hall is holding separate public meetings after the ruling group switched them from the evening to the morning when of course fewer people can attend. Much of the antagonism there stems from differences of opinion regarding projects as they affect Can Picafort. It's almost as though there has been a UDI. Perhaps that is what is needed for all the resorts, as the main beef with all of them and with the businesses in them, is that it is they, the resorts, which generate the revenues for the towns. This is no more so the case than in Muro and Santa Margalida where the "pueblos" have little or no tourism.

Ivory towerism, maybe that's it. And a touch of snobbery as well. The ancient towns, the ancient pueblos look down on the coarse commercialism of their resorts and, while grateful to extract every last tax, treat them as second-class. Vice-mayors? Maybe there should be separate mayors and separate budgets.


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Squeeze (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pehHNJWKf3g). Today's title - in 1967 she was offering her love and appeared in the film with the same title, and she was back in the '90s with this cracking song.

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I Keep Quiet About It

Get on the main coast road from Puerto Alcúdia, and where does it take you? The clue lies in the name of the road - Carretera Artà. The road runs parallel to the coast line, to the side of the bay of Alcúdia. It takes you into Playa de Muro, Can Picafort and then out into largely forest-bound territory to the coast side as you pass by Son Serra until you end up in Artà. Or maybe you don't end up. Instead, you carry on to Cala Ratjada or down the east coast to the likes of Cala Millor. That the road bears the name of Artà should suggest some importance, a major centre perhaps, but for most it is just a town on the way to somewhere else.

But before you get lost in Artà, struggling to locate the sign for Cala Ratjada, which is conveniently partially hidden and a surprise when you do see it, you might have noticed that large church, the one that rises from and dominates the landscape to your left. You might have thought, well, that looks interesting, but then you would still have kept going.

And that's the problem. People just keep going. Artà. It sounds like it's arterial, and its eponymous main road from Alcúdia pumps you through its centre and out the other end. No-one really goes to Artà, despite its prominence on road signs and the naming of the main coast road in the north. There again, why would you? What does Artà have by way of attraction? It barely registers on the tourist map or in tourist brochures.

Maybe it's coincidental - what I was saying the other day about Campos and towns that have minimal or little by way of real tourism - but Artà is set to be on the receiving end of some seven million euros worth of spend, courtesy of the Spanish tourist promotion body Turespaña. You might ask why they are bothering. I might ask, as one who believes that Mallorca's tourism is wedded to the masses, why do they bother. But you and I would be wrong. Mallorca is full of curios, of old towns that seem barely worth the effort, and of small coastal enclaves that time - mass-tourism time that is - appears to have past by. Because that is the attraction of Artà and its coastal tourism that barely dares to speak its name.

Before you arrive at Artà, there is a road off that is not much more than a lane. It takes you to Colonia Sant Pere and Betlem. Don't expect either of them to be keeping you carousing until dawn. They are end-of-the-road, dead-end, nothing-much-happens Mallorca, peculiar small coastal settlements of no more than spectacular views across the bay and spectacular high rises of hills that dominate them. They are both a part of the coastal plain brooded over by the sudden elevations of the mountain range of Artà. And they want to spend seven million on these places? So they should. Or maybe they shouldn't, as it might disrupt the tranquility of those who have stumbled across Sant Pere and Betlem and would prefer to keep them secret. Or maybe they shouldn't announce the rich antiquity of this part of the island, evidenced by the prehistoric Ses Païsses just outside Artà.

Sometimes, maybe they should just spend the money on keeping places quiet.


A MAYOR UNDER SIEGE - THE STORY CONTINUES
Another week, another tough time for Pollensa's mayor. It's all a load of rubbish. And that is how the organisation for tourism businesses, Acotur, has portrayed the increases in rubbish collection and incineration charges. In some cases (as noted in "The Diario"), these are set to rise by some 300 per cent. These are, of course, tough times too for businesses, and such steep hikes in rubbish tax are the last things they need. Mayor Cerdà argues that the real cost of the tax has not been passed on over the past few years, which will come as small consolation to businesses hit by other rising charges in a downturn.

And pedestrianisation? The mayor has reiterated that he is willing to look at alternative plans for "mobility" in the port, and one such has emerged from a combination of Partido Popular and Unió Mallorquina (UM) members. This has arisen as a consequence of a meeting with the residents associations of both Gotmar and the port. The other day when I spoke to Garry Bonsall, he told me that he was due to be seeing members of the UM who had previously abstained on votes in respect of the pedestrianisation. It would seem that alternative ideas, such as limiting traffic access to, for example, the mornings, are now being tabled. It may also be the case that the road would be open in the off-season. Why shouldn't it be? At present there are enough drivers ignoring the "closure" as it is. What is revealing is that the mayor seems not only to be opposed by other political parties, he doesn't even have the wholehearted support of his own party. To top all this off, a letter from the port's residents association has now been made public. This was a letter sent to the administration in October that makes clear the number of complaints regarding the scheme and that contradicts the view of the town hall that there was not a "majority of unrest" among the port's residents.

If he hasn't already, I fancy that the mayor is due to get a fair amount of egg on his face.

(Since making this entry, I hear that the rubbish tax is to actually go down for tourist businesses. U-turn on rubbish, and now for the pedestrianisation ...)


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Graham Swift, "Waterland". Today's title - from a song by an English female singer who recorded an album with the title of a book by another contemporary British novelist, Ian McEwan.

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We Fade To Grey

So was that it then? The season. Where did it go?

"The first day of summer. What a difference in terms of evocativeness there is between two adjectives - first and last. The former, the first, is optimism, excitement, the new."

That was back on 1 May. Where did all that optimism go? Was it excitement, or was it trepidation? Was it really new or just the same routine of hope and pray? Whatever it was, it's gone. Ended. Over. That was the season, and not everyone will be mourning its passing, though there will be foreboding as to the winter that starts today.

In keeping with the change of the tourism seasons, I started to feel increasingly cold yesterday. I was sitting on the terrace of the Hotel Uyal in Puerto Pollensa. The wind, though with nothing like the ferocity of the past days, was chilly when it picked up. I was there for some three hours, a long chat, a long chat with two of the movers behind that association I mentioned the other day - Asociación de Britanicos Irlandeses Residentes Empresarios y Trabajadores en las Baleares. Jim and Ray had come up from Santa Ponsa. Jim, who's Scottish, remarked that the bay reminded him of Scotland. A loch perhaps; I don't know, I've never seen one. But the rather misty silverness of the sky mingling with the calm grey sea with the backdrop of the hills to either side, partly shrouded by the intermediacy between black and white of cloud, might well be reminiscent. Maybe that's why so many Scots go to Puerto Pollensa.

Inevitably we got round to talking about the winter. It's probably worse in Santa Ponsa than it is in Alcúdia or Pollensa. Some places had shut back in September. Looking for ways of boosting all tourism, but especially that in winter, is one of the aims of the association. Talk to TUI, talk to Thomas Cook. Maybe. Tour operators are not necessarily known for their altruism. They would need a reason, and that probably has to be given to them via a bottom-up approach as I mentioned previously. Otherwise, the likes of TUI have got the Canaries and Egypt and further afield to fill their winter brochures. Mallorca's slow death in winter is in inverse proportion to the expansion of other destinations over the years. The tour operators follow the sun, just like the tourists do. There is no altruism. Were there to be, then they might stop offering all-inclusives in Alcúdia. But then they'd say they're being sort of altruistic in keeping the customer satisfied. They can't satisfy everyone, only themselves.

But there's sense in trying. Amidst all the moans of winter, who does anything? There will be plenty who feel it - the association - is just a waste of time. Someone's got to give it a go though. I'm not sure how many trust the local tourist authorities to rouse themselves other than to bang on about such things as golf courses when there are plenty of those elsewhere. Golf is follow-me competition. It is hardly a strong selling point.

I say to Jim and Ray that one problem is the very notion of an "association". There is a reason for it being called so, and that's to do with how the Spanish define and name things. Association it is, by association and by incorporation. There are those who would run a mile from anything tagged with the word, like I normally would. Maybe it should have a nickname so no one will notice. Call it "Reggie" or "Ronnie" or something; though maybe not both of them together.

There have to be benefits, I go on. Clear benefits. People want to know what's in it for them. Bar owners and others are not necessarily altruistic when it comes to also paying the rent and the suppliers, nor might they dip into their pockets for a membership fee without knowing that there's a potential return. So there will be a benefit statement, and then some ideas to be pursued via a website as well as a sporting angle - rugby, football, bowls, all on the agenda, and not just as a social thing, but from a tourism perspective. Everything's open to suggestion. And I remember Juan, who's involved with the Alcúdia rugby club, and his notion of rugby tourism. They're playing Menorca today. Maybe I should get along.

The association is potentially a good idea, notwithstanding some also potential drawbacks that have been expressed to me, and which I have outlined above. There is also great scope in terms of its objectives. And maybe there will be some real action. There is a recognition that the whingeing and just talking have to stop. It could be an interesting ride.

Here is a link for information about the association - http://theassociation.club.officelive.com


MEANWHILE ... POLLENSA TOWN HALL
So while the mere mortals are adjusting to the change of the season, the town hall (reported in "The Diario") has been having a meeting and turning down the motion against the pedestrianisation scheme which had been backed by a petition of some one thousand signatures. Mayor Cerdà says that there will be a new plan for "mobility" that will be based on "general consensus", by which one presumes he means widespread consultation. He also defended the pedestrianisation scheme by reference to a report from the local police which concluded that the scheme was "viable". I suppose the question is whether the police have come up with this report since the pedestrianisation trial was implemented or whether it came before. And on another matter - the camino de Ternelles in Pollensa - the mayor has promised that he will sign an order to have it opened to the public ... eventually.


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Madonna (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bb8akXtOCaI). Today's title - probably the defining new romantics song.

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I Will Follow You Into The Dark

So where were we? Ah yes, that story about the parking in Puerto Pollensa being closed; the story that proved not to be a story when the mayor denied that there was any intention of doing so. Well, according to the "Diario", the chap who raised the whole issue, apparently separate to any policy of the town hall, has announced that he will be quitting his post as councillor for culture in Pollensa in order to spend more time on his other job as a director with the Mallorca council. The timing of this announcement, coming soon after this whole parking issue, does seem a little odd. Why would he have been making statements about potential changes to the parking area, albeit that they seemed to be outside his brief, if he knew he was going to be leaving the administration? Or maybe he didn't know.

And further to 16 October (The End Is The Beginning ...), another representative on the town hall, i.e. the one for Esquerra Unida-Els Verds, says that he has got the signatures of more than 300 residents who oppose the pedestrianisation, and that he will table a motion to put an end to it at a town hall meeting this week. Doubt that he'll have much success. I wonder how many of the 300 are from the Gotmar radicals. Their siding with Catalan leftists would seem most incongruous.


THE ONLY GAY CLUB IN THE VILLAGE
Something about which one doesn't hear much or indeed anything around these parts is gay culture; probably because there isn't one, in the sense of gay bars or clubs. I had always thought that were there such clubs or were there to ever be any, they would be in Can Picafort. Quite why I thought that I don't really know. Anyway, what should I see in the newsagents but a flyer for ... a gay club. And where? You got it. Can Picafort; the Son Bauló end to be precise. Opening Thursday is Momo, not to be confused with the Momo restaurant that used to be in Alcanada. So, if you happen to be one of the "most chic people", as the flyer has it, then Momo is the place for you. I'm not sure what a most chic person is. Presumably, one knows if one is. There used of course to be - for a short period - La Belle in Puerto Alcúdia. I don't know that it qualified as a gay bar as such; the drag acts were primarily for tourists - of any sexual identity. Maybe Gerard will be appearing at Momo from now on as it promises - "DJs, Drags, Dancers, Glam Dark Room". Now I'm not so naïve as to not understand what a dark room is, but what is a glam dark room? And if it's dark, how does one know?


NO LENDING? NOT SO
A while ago I spoke about the potential difficulties for new businesses in raising credit from the banks to buy traspasos. Lending may have become much tighter, but there was a heartening story told to me yesterday which proves that, so long as you have been keeping your bank account in good nick, the chances are the banks will lend. I don't know that I should say which businessman with a current restaurant or indeed for which place he has obtained the traspaso (save that it is currently one of the multitude of Chinese restaurants in Alcúdia, but will cease to be). But with all the gloomy news knocking around, there is still some light in the darkness.


FOOTBALL REPLICA KIT - UPDATE
I can announce that this blog is formally in alliance with Danny Baker's 6-0-6 in seeking to drive the horror of the football replica kit from the streets and everywhere else of the island. Following on from the earlier piece (2 October: Here I Go Again), last night's show insisted that the wearing of all replica shirts when leaving the UK is now banned. There are a few concessions once here. Shirts for non-league teams are permissible. Shirts for other teams can be worn but only in a bar if you have arrived in another shirt and then changed into the replica shirt. On leaving the bar, there would need to be a change back. Otherwise, no football shirts are to be worn in public.


And as to the weather. I mentioned that a big change was forecast. Big, big rain. Yesterday evening and last night. Temperature - down, down, down. And periods of darkness owing to power cuts. Just when you thought it was safe to blow out the candles, what happens ...


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Traffic, "The Low Spark Of High Heeled Boys" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9rDJvGSFY-c), which I suppose might have been apt for one of today's stories. But to today's title - very good American indie group capable of some sweet songs; like this one. Think taxi that has passed away.

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(Car) Parklife

Further to yesterday's note about the plan to get rid of the front line parking area in Puerto Pollensa, there is more to be said about the whole scheme which would envisage the moving of the boat maintenance area and also an upgrading of the tourist office. On this latter point, it is said that the office is "obsolete" and requires modernising. This is one way of saying that it was inadequate from the moment it was conceived, and its construction was not that long ago; three years maybe. Obsolescence occurs swiftly in the Pollensa tourist office world. Modernising should mean making bigger. The office is supremely well located, but it is far too small and has insufficient storage space, so improvements should be welcome. The only problem is likely to be how long they take to effect them. When the old tourist office was closed, a temporary one was set up in the municipal building, and the whole process seemed to drag on interminably before the now office was finally completed. Yet it was hardly a major job of construction; the office is little more than a shack.

In respect of the mooted planning closure, it is said that this parking was theoretically intended for boat users. This, of course, is far from the case, but if it was the theory before, what is the theory and indeed practice meant to be now. Where would boat users park?

The report from the "Diario" yesterday does rather give the game away in terms of the thinking behind the elimination of the parking. It says that the pedestrianisation has the objective of progressively removing cars from the front line. Of course it does.

However, things are never quite as obvious as they might seem in the wonderful world of Pollensa town hall. The proposal for the elimination of the parking, and all the rest, comes from a councillor with one of the political groupings in the administration, namely the PSM (the socialist party of Mallorca). The mayor, who represents the nationalists, says that there is no such plan, and goes on to say that the town hall is going to create more parking in the La Gola area.

So let's be clear. Here we have a councillor, one responsible for culture, which does suggest that issues pertaining to infrastructure may actually be outside his brief, making an announcement to the Mallorcan press about something that the rest of the town hall have no intention of doing, or that is how it is now being presented. What exactly is going on? Is it simply some maverick going off on a complete and unofficial tangent, or might there be some substance to the plan? The mayor suggests that there isn't. It all seems very odd.


AND OVER IN ALCUDIA...
Various worthies gathered yesterday in Alcúdia's auditorium to present the project for the conversion of the old power station by the commercial port: it is meant to become a museum of science and technology and a "great icon in the north of the island" (I quote in translation from the report in the "Diario"). The only problem is that they haven't got the money in place, or rather they haven't, as yet, established exactly how the 23 million euros project is to be financed. Which does also seem a bit odd, that is that they would present the project without actually knowing when it's likely to start.


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Here are some Germans singing after drinking - fabulous, I'm sure you'll agree (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B7hg9ZtwaLM). Today's title - no word in brackets and who do you have? The video did of course strongly feature a car.

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The End Is The Beginning ...

And once more with feeling ... the pedestrianisation in Puerto Pollensa. Perhaps there is one political group that the Gotmar radicals could seek ballot-box redemption from - Esquerra Unida-Els Verds (a Catalan socialist-greens amalgam; "esquerra" is Catalan for "left"). Sounds a bit unlikely for the villa folk of the urbanisation, but needs and interests must - maybe. Anyway, the EU-EV agitators have called for an "immediate paralysation" of the pedestrianisation scheme, as reported in the "Diario". Am I alone in thinking that any political group with the word "green" anywhere near it would rather the road was closed? Whatever, they point, among other things, to the loss of business for traders affected by the road closure, one of these being the chemists which faces the possibility of having to lay off staff. That would be understandable. It was the case that one could just pull up outside the chemists; it was very convenient, but not now it isn't.

What seems to have been lacking in this whole saga is an unequivocal statement as to precisely the objective of the pedestrianisation. It has been couched in terms of ridding the front line of noise and of promoting a better image and so on, but who is it really intended for? Are tourism concerns the priority - that image thing?

It's impossible to get away from the conclusion that the prime reason is the justification of the new bypass road. That the pedestrianisation was mooted ages ago does not pacify those who, now that it has come to pass (or not, as it were), object to it. The tourism-image angle is really just spin. It's also impossible to escape the conclusion that the town hall has handled the whole affair in a hopeless fashion. Seemingly it failed to consult, and then when it did, did not consult widely enough. It has successfully managed to ostracise the already disaffected communities of Gotmar and Pinaret and to antagonise some business interests. And for what? Were tourists demanding pedestrianisation? I somewhat doubt it. And even now I suspect tourists are more concerned with dog shit on the pavements and the price of a pint of Mahou. That the issue has created so much controversy, that it has led to so many column inches, not least here on this blog, that it has brought the threat of legal action all merely emphasise the fact that it has divided opinion and that the town hall has made a pig's ear of it. At heart, it is a rather silly, small local matter, but silly, small, local matters matter to many people.

The town hall is being criticised from all sides at present. The opposition Partido Popular recently demanded some answers in respect of what is happening about the La Gola park and the public swimming-pool, the latter which has been open and then not, has had its roof on the wrong way round and has generally been another cause célèbre of apparent incompetence. Yet amidst this non-resolution, the town hall goes and picks a fight with residents and business over something of questionable importance and which will cost money, that the town hall doesn't have, to make permanent. One does begin to understand why a local residents association might make an election pact with a party that might give the ruling body a bloody nose.


REAL MALLORCA - THE END
Another story that has been followed here for what seems an age does, finally, seem to have drawn to a close. The judge presiding over the affairs of Real Mallorca's owner, Vicente Grande, has given the green light to the takeover by Paul Davidson. It's not totally the end in that Davidson has now to pay, but after all the haggling and the possibilities of other buyers, the club is now British-owned. So we can all feel very proud of that I suppose. And yet, do we?

"The Bulletin" celebrated the judge's decision with an eight-page special; it is doubtful that it would have done so had the new owner been anything other than British. Is the local expat really that bothered? For the most part, I would question it. Which is not to say that the story shouldn't have been covered; it has been and will be interesting, and the profile of the team will have been raised in the eyes of the expat. It has been a godsend to an English newspaper. But this English/British angle has made its coverage rather one-dimensional; the nationality thing has been THE story, the rest largely by the by. Yet the rest is far from inconsequential. That rest includes, apart from the obvious of the team's development and performance, the extent to which Paul Davidson can win over the local fans and opinion against a foreign owner and the strategy surrounding the club's purchase, which I went into the other day (7 October: Match Of The Day). For example, Mr. Davidson wants to increase the numbers of British and German fans coming to matches. All well and good, but how does that play with the Mallorcans?

While opposition to the takeover has been referred to and the strategy mentioned in passing, the essential Anglo-centricity of the story has glossed over these aspects. The paper itself featured a letter expressing concern as to the planned plastics recycling plant, but this has not been followed up. The strategy has not been scrutinised, simply mentioned as a mark of Mallorca's attraction to a British investor. It is one thing to hear and present Paul Davidson's own views, and in this regard the paper has acted in a sort of unofficial PR capacity. But it is quite another to analyse what he's about. The story hasn't really begun.


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - "Ball Of Confusion", The Temptations (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8BJOXopGW8g). Today's title - "... Is The End"; American rock outfit; Halloween's on its way.

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My Secret Garden

One of those scandals to which I referred the other day (3 October) has taken an hilarious turn; hilarious and scarcely believable. The scandal centres on payments allegedly received by various individuals in the previous Balearic Government administration in return for contracts. So get this. Buried in the garden of Antonia Ordinas, the ex-director general for economic development and one of those implicated, was the small matter of 200 grands' worth of euros. Now I wonder how that got there. Maybe the dog buried it; that'll be it. Or was this all an innovative approach to economic development? Plant the dosh and watch it grow.

I'm thinking of digging up my garden and looking to see if someone, or some dog, might have been kind enough to have secreted a similar stash. I doubt it; more likely it would reveal a decayed Trevor's body and the resultant swift dash for the first EasyJet out of Palma by a Mandy and a Beth. Just my rotten luck. Though that was the patio; and no, I'm not digging that up. A word to those who may misappropriate funds in the future - could there be a tad more democracy about it, and spread the burying around.

Democracy suffers as a consequence of such scandals, or rather the impulse to effect what becomes a scandal undermines democracy. If people in high places act in such a way, then democracy is shot; trust is a fundamental of the system. The problem is that politics here (and elsewhere, let's not get sanctimonious) is, or has been, like the Tour de France or the Olympics sprint finals; you suspect some of them are doping, but you don't know which ones. So it is, or let's hope was, in public life when it comes to illicitly gained wedges. However, this latest scandal, following on from others both at local and regional governmental levels, is not necessarily an indication of an endemically corrupt system. As I said on 3 October, the greater teeth given to the police and the greater rigour with which they are willing to root out corruption is likely to produce results - and the resultant publicity - that might at one time have been swept under the carpet or buried in the garden.

Nevertheless, the impression is that there was something rotten in the state of the Balearics during the last administration; a former minister is now alleged to have known all about the currently unfolding scandal. Invariably, this makes it a party political matter as the previous administration was controlled by the Partido Popular, while the current one is that of PSOE socialists. The PSOE might though be cautious in claiming the moral high ground when it comes to the schadenfreude of sleaze; just ask New Labour.


And so to today's adventures with the pedestrianising folk of Puerto Pollensa. Firstly, the closure between Elcano and Bot applies to both directions. Previously it was said that the route from Avenida Paris to Alcúdia would remain open. Seemingly, it isn't. Secondly, the "Diario" has unearthed some who actually think it's a good idea, quoting one lady who suggests that tourists in hotels and apartments are delighted. They may well be, but, with the exception of the Hotel Romantic and the odd apartments, the road remains open in front of all the other hotels - Uyal and Pollentia, for example. And are those in the Uyal and Pollentia not delighted? Are they clamouring for a bit of their own front-hotel pedestrianisation? No, I don't suppose they are.


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Genesis (again). Today's title - Brit electro pop band; song from the early '80s, but they're still going.

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Relax? Won't Do It

Credit needed. Fat chance, you might think. The organisation for small to medium-sized businesses is asking for a relaxation of the rules to allow banks to extend credit to small businesses which are, or will be, struggling. I doubt that there will be any relaxation.

One of the reasons why Spain is in a relatively good position to withstand the worst of the financial and banking crisis is the regulation of banks. While some of the smaller savings banks may be vulnerable, the larger ones should be safe enough. At the heart of this is an old stipulation put into place by the Bank of Spain which forced banks to build up reserves to combat precisely the kind of crisis that has engulfed institutions elsewhere. The banks had to create reserves to meet bad loans. Santander, the saviour of Bradford & Bingley, benefited from such sound management as well as an acquisition policy that has made it one of Europe's leading banks. Moreover, the national bank's rules prevented much of the bundling of mortgage risk into financial products, the type of which led to the toxic debt of the sub-prime crisis in the USA.

Nevertheless, there has been an almighty amount of lending, and therefore debt, in the form of mortgages, and now there is the problem of people who have taken on large mortgages for overpriced properties being unable to meet higher mortgage repayments but unable to lower prices of these properties. The banks are trying to be accommodating, but there is also so little mortgage lending occurring at present that those facing negative equity are unlikely to attract buyers even if those buyers were persuaded to pay the prices being sought to cover the high mortgages. In this climate, therefore, it is difficult to see how the banks can be persuaded to take a more relaxed attitude towards their business lending. This could have quite significant repercussions. Businesses, such as bars or restaurants, that are available for purchase might normally be snapped up, but unless a buyer has the cash or certainly the bulk of it, a loan is far less likely to be offered as part of the purchase package. One can anticipate, perhaps, that more businesses may stay closed with no purchaser and the owner unable to trade. Another aspect of the credit crunch is likely to be felt as the new season next year approaches. It is not uncommon, certainly at the start of the season, for businesses to get credit from suppliers. Yet these suppliers may well be seeking credit from their suppliers, and so the cycle goes. If the banks won't assist and if suppliers are reluctant to either, then one does wonder how easy some businesses are going to find even getting going next year.


EVER MORE PEDESTRIANISATION AND ROAD SIGNS
And once more into the breach, dear friends, the breech position of the Puerto Pollensa pedestrianisation, now with added Bot dimension. Where would we be without it? The press had it that the trial closure of the front line was to be between the Calle Elcano and the Avenida Paris. It isn't. Apologies, because I said before that it was, because that was how it was being reported. Yesterday morning, I happened to spy a notice in the El Pozo bar in the port. It said that the closure was to be between Elcano and Calle Bot. For those who do not know, Calle Bot is the road that goes past the Pollensa Park hotel; it is further down the road than Avenida Paris going towards Alcúdia. So I went and checked, and the diversion sign does indeed send traffic along Calle Bot. Thanks for the misinformation.

As far as the Gotmar residents challenge is concerned, this doesn't change things that much, albeit that the Calle Bot and then the Calle Cadernera meet up with the roundabout on the new road for Gotmar. More of an issue perhaps, were this to become a permanentish state, is that the Calle Bot is not a road designed to take great volumes of traffic. It may no longer be the pitted and potted horror it once was, but it is narrow, and when there are delivery trucks parked up by the bars, Bot is also a pain in the arse. However, I sense in all this a cunning plan by Mayor Cerdà. He and his town hall chums will already know that Bot is a botch of impracticality. So at some point they will sit in session and say that it's not quite working, this Bot-ty passage. And some bright spark, who has been rehearsing the lines handed to him, will receive the end of the metaphorical mayoral pointed stick, spring to attention and declare that there is a road that is suitable for traffic, the Avenida Llenaire. And they will all nod their heads and say, "why didn't we think of that?". Though of course they did and had, as this was the plan all along - to pedestrianise the whole of the road from Llenaire. And so it will happen because the alternative has been designed to fail. Cue ever more angst in the ranks of the Gotmar radicals.

Now that the pedestrianisation trial has been started, there is still the question of the road signs. As one comes to the junction of Juan XXIII, the road down to the roundabout by the entrance to the nautical club, and the Calle Vicente Buades, the road signs show right for Palma and Pollensa and left for Alcúdia. Ever since the new road opened, this has been a nonsense; it is now even more of a nonsense, as you can of course no longer get to Alcúdia if you happen to go left, which of course many a tourist in a hire car will attempt. Go left, go right, who knows?


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Paul Young (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8l8D0aFVjvg). Today's title - no prizes except for knowing which DJ saw to its banning by Radio One.

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