Oh dear, things aren't going too well, are they. You remember - how are you allowed to forget - all that stuff about tourism heading up-market, about "quality" tourism, about transformations (Magalluf's, if nowhere else), about improvements to image, about eradication of drunken tourism. You do remember, don't you. Do you remember thinking it was all nonsense? If you did, then well done. Have a banana, but don't whatever you do use it for a purpose other than eating.
Shall we put together an inventory of the past few days? Where shall we start? Ah yes, the beaches in Cala Ratjada (and sorry if I offend those who insist that Cala Agulla and Son Moll aren't Cala Ratjada). The dunes being used as a communal toilet. Loud music on the beaches. Drinking, as in alcohol in glass containers (bottles to you and me), which are verboten. German tourists may not know that they are verboten, though normal German common sense (of which there is a great deal in most circumstances) should determine the fact that taking glass onto beaches isn't one of the best ideas in the world.
From Cala Ratjada we move south to Playa de Palma. What did we find there? Among other things, the image of a colossal, pale German youth sort seated at the wall in der Nähe vom Ballermann Sechs (aka Strandlokal, aka Balneario 6), surrounded by all sorts of debris of a drinking nature. My, how the locals lapped that photo up. Elsewhere in Playa de Palma, there was someone defecating in the street (captured on video).
Then we nip over to Palmanova. Normally dwarfed on the antics' front by its rowdy neighbour, it was subjected to the unedifying spectacle of eighteen young British (male) tourists taking a jog in broad daylight across the beach road, while another one was stopping traffic (or attempting to). Just a bit of high jinks? Possibly so, but try telling the locals that, in particular any who might have had kiddies at a nearby playground.
Into Magalluf itself and there were English and Scottish so-called supporters enacting normally nightly battles on the Punta Ballena in broad daylight. It was curious to hear match reports speaking of England fans applauding their Scottish counterparts and everyone having got on famously. In Magalluf, ludicrous enmities were persisting. Bar chairs were substitutes for seats hurled in a stadium. And it was all on video and all over YouTube. Thanks to the video, as was the case with Palmanova, plod were able to identify some of the miscreants.
And plod have definitely taken an interest in the video in the Bierkönig. Yep, we're back in Playa de Palma, where a group of German neo-Nazis caused uproar by shouting "foreigners out" and brandishing the Kaiser's flag. Their fellow countrymen, very much in the majority, responded with "Nazis out". The local police service for hate crimes and intolerance has referred the matter to the prosecution service. The target of these repulsive Nazi foreigners was a "foreigner" with black skin.
So, what do we learn from all of this? We learn that there is nothing new under a burning Mallorcan June sun or within the confines of a beer hall. Nazis? Get them every year. Their targets are always the same. Drunkenness in Cala Ratjada? They've been lamenting that for ages and identifying the same cause - German youth. Streaking naked? Somewhat original perhaps, but largely because it was on video. Fighting in Magalluf? Well, who would have ever have thought?
Calvia town hall, virtuous Calvia town hall, with its transformational bylaws to support transformational Meliaisation, insists that nudists in Palmanova and brawling Scots and English are the fault of some businesses which are not adhering to the model of change. They are continuing with happy hours, with pub crawls, with low-quality all-inclusive. They're just not playing the game.
Maybe Calvia is right. But it seems all too easy to blame problems on certain businesses in-resort and not others. Not everyone travels with tour operators, but a lot do, and tour operators need to start walking the talk of responsibility rather than just filling planes, ferries and rooms with whoever can meet their volume requirements. They really don't care, even if - where British tour operators are concerned - they are starting to care about false compensation claims.
But let's not castigate British and German tour operators. What about some Spanish? Part of Alcudia is about to be laid waste to, courtesy of a Spanish tour operator. Magalluf, Playa de Palma, Cala Ratjada know the same or similar scenario.
The worst aspect of all this is that it neglects something else that hasn't changed and shows no sign of changing. Lads having a bundle, other lads streaking; they divert attention from the mugging prostitutes, the ones about whom virtuous Calvia can seemingly do nothing. Do nothing, and nothing is changing.
Showing posts with label Drinking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Drinking. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 14, 2017
Thursday, June 08, 2017
The Drinking Teenagers Of Mallorca
Hidden behind the rose-tinted sunglasses of a foreign observer, let's call him or her British, there is, one suspects, an enduring opinion regarding the youth and teenagers of Mallorca and Spain. Unlike their British counterparts, who will binge until they drop, the local youth are paragons of adolescent virtue who would no more partake of alcohol than they would dare to utter a swear word.
Generalisations are, as we are all aware, only so useful. They fail to provide an accurate view of society and of its component parts, of which the youth is one. Society is too complex for generalisations to suffice, but they are made nevertheless. Hence, there is the impulse to brand British youth in one way and to do so in a negative fashion when compared with other nationalities, notably the Spanish. Raised in an atmosphere and culture of respect for elders and respect for alcohol, the difference is vast. If only it were so.
Recently, I spoke with the councillor for social services in Pollensa. This was in the context of the day against domestic violence that was held in the town. She was quite clear in seeing the link between alcohol (and drugs) and sexual aggression towards women. There is, she explained, a distinction between types of parenting. One type breeds a family culture of drinking. Not a respectful one but an abusive one.
So it is with parenting in other societies, but even the best parenting can be undone by the power of peer pressure. The alarming nature of what goes on in cyberspace has made this pressure even more intense. The "Blue Whale" game is one of the most extreme examples. The ultimate challenge is for a teenager to commit suicide by jumping off a building. What madness has been cultivated?
If peer pressure might be said to be intensifying, then so also are numbers attending fiestas intensifying. And with the increased numbers come increased incidents. The head of the Balearics 112 emergency service says that there has been a "spectacular increase" in the number of people going to parties in the villages and towns of Mallorca. The "incidents", such as those caused by drunkenness, have risen by up to fifteen per cent in the space of a year.
These increases cannot solely be explained by the fact of more teenagers going to them. There are, of course, far more tourists, though how many of these actually venture to night parties in the villages of the island would be open to question. But the participation of teenagers and the concerns this is raising has led the president of the town halls' federation (and also the mayor of Sencelles) to propose placing restrictions on under-16s attending. His proposal is against a background of the most recent finding regarding alcohol consumption by the young: the average age of starting to drink is 13.8 years.
Over many years now, local authorities have been attempting (and failing) to tackle the existence of the "botellón". Street drinking parties affect all parts of Mallorca. The ages vary, but minors are among them. In Alcudia later this month, there is what is in effect a sanctioned botellón. It is in fact a "macro-botellón", the party for the end of the summer term. Hundreds, thousands of kids from parts of the island descend on the resort for one night of partying. Is drink an aspect of this? It most certainly is. And the numbers who attend offer certain hoteliers another little bonanza. Put them up and let them add to the aggravations already experienced by regular tourists because of Spanish youth.
Does this macro-botellón, though, point to a tolerance that might be said to have backfired? Local authorities are now speaking with some alarm about behaviour at fiestas to the extent that they may stop the younger elements attending, whereas they haven't previously. In Alcudia, police tutors from different municipalities advise youngsters beforehand and are themselves present. But police, as always, can only do so much. Controlling access to fiestas makes demands on police, who are stretched enough during the summer. And Alcudia is the latest town hall to admit to not having sufficient police numbers to deal with, for example, illegal selling.
A way of tackling the problem with drinking is to come down more on supermarkets. Some 60% of kids between the ages of 14 and 17 say that they buy booze from supermarkets. The government's director for public health says that there is a "problem" with teenage drinking. The fact is that it is not a new problem. Put away the rose-tinted sunglasses. Mallorca youth is like any other youth.
Generalisations are, as we are all aware, only so useful. They fail to provide an accurate view of society and of its component parts, of which the youth is one. Society is too complex for generalisations to suffice, but they are made nevertheless. Hence, there is the impulse to brand British youth in one way and to do so in a negative fashion when compared with other nationalities, notably the Spanish. Raised in an atmosphere and culture of respect for elders and respect for alcohol, the difference is vast. If only it were so.
Recently, I spoke with the councillor for social services in Pollensa. This was in the context of the day against domestic violence that was held in the town. She was quite clear in seeing the link between alcohol (and drugs) and sexual aggression towards women. There is, she explained, a distinction between types of parenting. One type breeds a family culture of drinking. Not a respectful one but an abusive one.
So it is with parenting in other societies, but even the best parenting can be undone by the power of peer pressure. The alarming nature of what goes on in cyberspace has made this pressure even more intense. The "Blue Whale" game is one of the most extreme examples. The ultimate challenge is for a teenager to commit suicide by jumping off a building. What madness has been cultivated?
If peer pressure might be said to be intensifying, then so also are numbers attending fiestas intensifying. And with the increased numbers come increased incidents. The head of the Balearics 112 emergency service says that there has been a "spectacular increase" in the number of people going to parties in the villages and towns of Mallorca. The "incidents", such as those caused by drunkenness, have risen by up to fifteen per cent in the space of a year.
These increases cannot solely be explained by the fact of more teenagers going to them. There are, of course, far more tourists, though how many of these actually venture to night parties in the villages of the island would be open to question. But the participation of teenagers and the concerns this is raising has led the president of the town halls' federation (and also the mayor of Sencelles) to propose placing restrictions on under-16s attending. His proposal is against a background of the most recent finding regarding alcohol consumption by the young: the average age of starting to drink is 13.8 years.
Over many years now, local authorities have been attempting (and failing) to tackle the existence of the "botellón". Street drinking parties affect all parts of Mallorca. The ages vary, but minors are among them. In Alcudia later this month, there is what is in effect a sanctioned botellón. It is in fact a "macro-botellón", the party for the end of the summer term. Hundreds, thousands of kids from parts of the island descend on the resort for one night of partying. Is drink an aspect of this? It most certainly is. And the numbers who attend offer certain hoteliers another little bonanza. Put them up and let them add to the aggravations already experienced by regular tourists because of Spanish youth.
Does this macro-botellón, though, point to a tolerance that might be said to have backfired? Local authorities are now speaking with some alarm about behaviour at fiestas to the extent that they may stop the younger elements attending, whereas they haven't previously. In Alcudia, police tutors from different municipalities advise youngsters beforehand and are themselves present. But police, as always, can only do so much. Controlling access to fiestas makes demands on police, who are stretched enough during the summer. And Alcudia is the latest town hall to admit to not having sufficient police numbers to deal with, for example, illegal selling.
A way of tackling the problem with drinking is to come down more on supermarkets. Some 60% of kids between the ages of 14 and 17 say that they buy booze from supermarkets. The government's director for public health says that there is a "problem" with teenage drinking. The fact is that it is not a new problem. Put away the rose-tinted sunglasses. Mallorca youth is like any other youth.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Drunk On The Job
Bar work and booze are inseparable. Booze is the stock in trade of the bar, but when the stocks of the trade start to disappear in directions that they shouldn't, the trade itself is damaged. This should be obvious, but laxity of controls suggests otherwise.
I first became aware of bar stock control, or the lack of it, when I was at university. You would think that a university would, because of its well-educated staff, have a grip on the basics of control, but not in my college they didn't, and the same went for other colleges on the campus. Of the eight campus bars, there was constant debate as to which one held the honour of having the drunkest bar manager (the word "manager" was only loosely applied).
The bar manager in my college had a face the colour of which fluctuated in its shades of purple. It wasn't the incident when he was hurled through a patio window that lost him his job - he survived - it was when the college's senior staff, who were meant to supervise the bar's operation, finally cottoned on to the level of "shrinkage". His parting gift was to urinate into the pipes.
As student president of the college, I was shown the books, such as they were. They made no sense. Nothing tallied, nothing balanced. There were apparent losses per unit (be it barrel or bottle), and the reason why was that there was no control.
It is pretty difficult to make a loss on a barrel of beer. A bar in Mallorca might pay around 50 euros for a 50-litre barrel of Saint Mick (the list price is higher, while the actual price can be lower than 50 euros). From this barrel, the bar can extract the equivalent of almost 90 pints. Even at a low price of two euros a pint, the direct contribution of beer sold should be edging up towards 130 euros. Yet a loss can be made. The reason? All the beer that isn't paid for.
A bar owner who is on the premises all or most of the time who chooses to give away free beer or free whatever and/or to drink him or herself into an early grave (and there have been the odd one or two) does at least exercise some control, even if it is control that is out of the control. He or she only has him or herself to blame if the return on a barrel, a bottle, a bag of sausages, whatever it might be, is not what it should be. Exercise firm control, on the other hand, and the return will be more or less as it should be, notwithstanding the inevitable, pretty much expected freebies that are extended to the likes of suppliers.
Where loss is more likely to occur is when control is lax or absent and the owner is also absent. Unless there are strict controls and strict rules as to what is or isn't permissible in terms of staff drinking (or eating) on duty, the losses accrue. I know they do, because I know examples, as I know examples of staff ostensibly in charge who are in a state of pretty much permanent inebriation; it is only the scale of the inebriation which tends to vary.
Apart from the loss, there are other factors when the hired hands are helping themselves to the beer pumps. It may all seem very convivial to join customers for a drink, but does every customer want to be greeted by someone who stinks of Saint Mick? And what about, for example, a chef who has too much juice? There may not be many who go so far as Kurt in "Fawlty Towers" who drank himself unconscious because Manuel wouldn't give him a kiss, but there are examples of those who can pack a fair amount away while in charge of equipment that could cause a serious accident, to say nothing of damage to customers' meals.
Time was when there were few controls. Things have changed. There is far less allowance to staff to drink while on duty. It's right that this should be restricted or totally barred. A bar is a business for all the reasons of control, profit, image and customer service outlined above. Bar owners who have made the rules tighter have sometimes met with resistance; if that's how it is to be, then stick the job. Fine. Why though should anyone drink alcohol while working? Bar it may be, but it doesn't mean drinking it.
If a return, and a pretty decent return at that, cannot be made from a barrel, then there is something seriously amiss. The bar owner is probably in the wrong business, and if drinking staff can't or won't be confronted because this might upset them, then he or she is definitely in the wrong business. Times are tough enough as it is without the profits being drunk. And ultimately, where the customer is concerned, does anyone really like a drunk?
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
I first became aware of bar stock control, or the lack of it, when I was at university. You would think that a university would, because of its well-educated staff, have a grip on the basics of control, but not in my college they didn't, and the same went for other colleges on the campus. Of the eight campus bars, there was constant debate as to which one held the honour of having the drunkest bar manager (the word "manager" was only loosely applied).
The bar manager in my college had a face the colour of which fluctuated in its shades of purple. It wasn't the incident when he was hurled through a patio window that lost him his job - he survived - it was when the college's senior staff, who were meant to supervise the bar's operation, finally cottoned on to the level of "shrinkage". His parting gift was to urinate into the pipes.
As student president of the college, I was shown the books, such as they were. They made no sense. Nothing tallied, nothing balanced. There were apparent losses per unit (be it barrel or bottle), and the reason why was that there was no control.
It is pretty difficult to make a loss on a barrel of beer. A bar in Mallorca might pay around 50 euros for a 50-litre barrel of Saint Mick (the list price is higher, while the actual price can be lower than 50 euros). From this barrel, the bar can extract the equivalent of almost 90 pints. Even at a low price of two euros a pint, the direct contribution of beer sold should be edging up towards 130 euros. Yet a loss can be made. The reason? All the beer that isn't paid for.
A bar owner who is on the premises all or most of the time who chooses to give away free beer or free whatever and/or to drink him or herself into an early grave (and there have been the odd one or two) does at least exercise some control, even if it is control that is out of the control. He or she only has him or herself to blame if the return on a barrel, a bottle, a bag of sausages, whatever it might be, is not what it should be. Exercise firm control, on the other hand, and the return will be more or less as it should be, notwithstanding the inevitable, pretty much expected freebies that are extended to the likes of suppliers.
Where loss is more likely to occur is when control is lax or absent and the owner is also absent. Unless there are strict controls and strict rules as to what is or isn't permissible in terms of staff drinking (or eating) on duty, the losses accrue. I know they do, because I know examples, as I know examples of staff ostensibly in charge who are in a state of pretty much permanent inebriation; it is only the scale of the inebriation which tends to vary.
Apart from the loss, there are other factors when the hired hands are helping themselves to the beer pumps. It may all seem very convivial to join customers for a drink, but does every customer want to be greeted by someone who stinks of Saint Mick? And what about, for example, a chef who has too much juice? There may not be many who go so far as Kurt in "Fawlty Towers" who drank himself unconscious because Manuel wouldn't give him a kiss, but there are examples of those who can pack a fair amount away while in charge of equipment that could cause a serious accident, to say nothing of damage to customers' meals.
Time was when there were few controls. Things have changed. There is far less allowance to staff to drink while on duty. It's right that this should be restricted or totally barred. A bar is a business for all the reasons of control, profit, image and customer service outlined above. Bar owners who have made the rules tighter have sometimes met with resistance; if that's how it is to be, then stick the job. Fine. Why though should anyone drink alcohol while working? Bar it may be, but it doesn't mean drinking it.
If a return, and a pretty decent return at that, cannot be made from a barrel, then there is something seriously amiss. The bar owner is probably in the wrong business, and if drinking staff can't or won't be confronted because this might upset them, then he or she is definitely in the wrong business. Times are tough enough as it is without the profits being drunk. And ultimately, where the customer is concerned, does anyone really like a drunk?
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Friday, September 16, 2011
Drinking Mallorca By The Bucket
Once upon a time you took a bucket and spade to the beach. You still take a bucket to the beach, but you no longer fill it with sand. You fill it instead with the boys' bevvy. Booze. Booze by the bucketloads.
The season has witnessed a growth in the sale of buckets in Mallorca's resorts, mainly Magalluf, Palmanova, Arenal and Cala Ratjada. The attraction of the bucket is not restricted by culture. Both the Brits and the Germans are bucketheads. There is a whole in their buckets, dear Lisa and liebe Lisa, a whole load of beer in their buckets.
"Drunken tourism" is becoming such an accepted term in the tourism lexicon that the Balearics Tourism Agency should give serious consideration to its inclusion in its marketing strategy. Alongside the alternatives of culture and good scoff, there would also be the promotion of drunken tourism. Where alcohol is concerned, they might have more in mind the attractions of local vino, available from boutique bodegas at absurd prices per bottle and with designer labels. Instead, they've got buckets with a sticky bar code and cold drink at bucketshop prices.
The agency wouldn't of course promote any such thing. All bad for the image and what have you: British and German youths traipsing off to the nearest beach with their buckets, crates of cheap drink and a box of straws. Oh no, you can't have gatherings of public drinking. You wouldn't get the local lads and lasses doing this. Except of course, that's exactly what you do get. If the locals can stage a "botellón", why shouldn't tourists do something similar? And, moreover, do it during the day when the sun's shining.
Boozing has been around in Mallorca as long as mass tourism has been. It might have changed in its nature - the bucket did used to be reserved solely for its accompanying spade in the good old days - but it has always been an essential part of the holiday experience. It was not only essential, it would also have been a badly missed opportunity in those good old days. A handful of pesetas for a liberal measure, followed by another handful of pesetas ... and for the same cost as a couple of Double Diamonds back in the UK, you could get tanked up enough to require a stomach pump.
Resorts in Mallorca may not be the leading exponents of drunken tourism in Spain - Lloret de Mar, as I wrote about previously, lays claim to the number-one slot - they may not even be among the leaders in the Med (think the alternatives such as Zante and its industrial alcohol), but they are still prominent, as they always have been.
Nevertheless, the growth in the phenomenon of drinking by the bucketload is causing sufficient concern for the Mallorca hoteliers' federation to call for a commission to look into the matter. What do they think this will achieve? A ban on the sale of buckets perhaps?
They could always try and get the drinking of alcohol in public places banned. Except they've tried this with the botellón with usually no effect whatsoever. In Alcúdia, there was meant to have been such a ban. If there was (or indeed still is), no one has taken much notice. Moreover, how would you define such a ban? You couldn't stop a holdaymaker (or indeed a local) cracking open a can of Saint Mick on the beach.
What the hoteliers are really concerned about is the fact that there are too many young people pitching up and occupying rooms that the hoteliers would prefer were kept for families. They're never satisfied, are they. TUI, and for once TUI is not trying to skirt the issue, has said that the youth market is important. Of course it's important. It means bums on airline seats and hanging out of balconies in hotels. Hats off to TUI. It is reported as also saying that "golfers and five star hotels alone don't fill airplanes". Well, well, well.
Quite how the youth market with their buckets and beer equates to a TUI vision of sustainable tourism I'm not sure. But sales of holidays are sales of holidays; sustainability can go hang, along with any sense that a tour operator should discriminate in terms of who it actually sells a holiday to. Which it most certainly shouldn't.
Ultimately, there is a fear that the bucketheads will drive away the family tourist. But it is a vastly overstated fear. Mallorca's tourism has always been a mix, as has that of its resorts: a bucket and spade for the kids and a bucket and beer for the older kids.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
The season has witnessed a growth in the sale of buckets in Mallorca's resorts, mainly Magalluf, Palmanova, Arenal and Cala Ratjada. The attraction of the bucket is not restricted by culture. Both the Brits and the Germans are bucketheads. There is a whole in their buckets, dear Lisa and liebe Lisa, a whole load of beer in their buckets.
"Drunken tourism" is becoming such an accepted term in the tourism lexicon that the Balearics Tourism Agency should give serious consideration to its inclusion in its marketing strategy. Alongside the alternatives of culture and good scoff, there would also be the promotion of drunken tourism. Where alcohol is concerned, they might have more in mind the attractions of local vino, available from boutique bodegas at absurd prices per bottle and with designer labels. Instead, they've got buckets with a sticky bar code and cold drink at bucketshop prices.
The agency wouldn't of course promote any such thing. All bad for the image and what have you: British and German youths traipsing off to the nearest beach with their buckets, crates of cheap drink and a box of straws. Oh no, you can't have gatherings of public drinking. You wouldn't get the local lads and lasses doing this. Except of course, that's exactly what you do get. If the locals can stage a "botellón", why shouldn't tourists do something similar? And, moreover, do it during the day when the sun's shining.
Boozing has been around in Mallorca as long as mass tourism has been. It might have changed in its nature - the bucket did used to be reserved solely for its accompanying spade in the good old days - but it has always been an essential part of the holiday experience. It was not only essential, it would also have been a badly missed opportunity in those good old days. A handful of pesetas for a liberal measure, followed by another handful of pesetas ... and for the same cost as a couple of Double Diamonds back in the UK, you could get tanked up enough to require a stomach pump.
Resorts in Mallorca may not be the leading exponents of drunken tourism in Spain - Lloret de Mar, as I wrote about previously, lays claim to the number-one slot - they may not even be among the leaders in the Med (think the alternatives such as Zante and its industrial alcohol), but they are still prominent, as they always have been.
Nevertheless, the growth in the phenomenon of drinking by the bucketload is causing sufficient concern for the Mallorca hoteliers' federation to call for a commission to look into the matter. What do they think this will achieve? A ban on the sale of buckets perhaps?
They could always try and get the drinking of alcohol in public places banned. Except they've tried this with the botellón with usually no effect whatsoever. In Alcúdia, there was meant to have been such a ban. If there was (or indeed still is), no one has taken much notice. Moreover, how would you define such a ban? You couldn't stop a holdaymaker (or indeed a local) cracking open a can of Saint Mick on the beach.
What the hoteliers are really concerned about is the fact that there are too many young people pitching up and occupying rooms that the hoteliers would prefer were kept for families. They're never satisfied, are they. TUI, and for once TUI is not trying to skirt the issue, has said that the youth market is important. Of course it's important. It means bums on airline seats and hanging out of balconies in hotels. Hats off to TUI. It is reported as also saying that "golfers and five star hotels alone don't fill airplanes". Well, well, well.
Quite how the youth market with their buckets and beer equates to a TUI vision of sustainable tourism I'm not sure. But sales of holidays are sales of holidays; sustainability can go hang, along with any sense that a tour operator should discriminate in terms of who it actually sells a holiday to. Which it most certainly shouldn't.
Ultimately, there is a fear that the bucketheads will drive away the family tourist. But it is a vastly overstated fear. Mallorca's tourism has always been a mix, as has that of its resorts: a bucket and spade for the kids and a bucket and beer for the older kids.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Wednesday, September 07, 2011
The Drinking World Cup
When Saturday comes. This Saturday it will be all-day pinting. Footy in the afternoon, but before comes England's first match in the Rugby World Cup. All-day pinting for Bar Brits.
A 10.30 local time kick-off. Too early for pinting? Not on your life. The rugby fan has a prodigious capacity for alcohol. Any time, day or night, it matters nought. Cometh the rugby, cometh the drinking. A match lasting eighty minutes. A game of two halves, and a game of at least four pints.
I became truly aware of the industrial amounts of beer that can be consumed in the name of rugby in 1978. Wales versus the All Blacks at Cardiff Arms Park. A match that ended in controversy, which was about the last thing I remembered before waking up the next morning in a bedroom that was unknown to me, in a house that was unknown to me, and in a house that wasn't in Cardiff. It was in fact somewhere in Somerset.
The obsessiveness of the true rugby devotee is as great if not greater than that of the most myopic of football fan. A then house mate of mine (who also happened to be captain of Wimbledon 1st XV) used to rise uncommonly early for him on a Saturday morning in order to watch the Lions tests against New Zealand in 1983. The early rise was doubly necessary; one, to watch the match and two, to prepare and then consume the entire contents of a supermarket by way of breakfast, liberally washed down with cans of Guinness.
For Bar Brits, the opportunities await during the World Cup. Other matches may start at eight local time, but there will be hordes of thirsty and hungry rugby aficionados banging on the shutters demanding extra full breakfasts and several large, foaming drinks. It should be rugby gold for the next few weeks.
This said, not every bar benefits from a rugby audience. During the 2007 competition, one particular bar, no longer with us (and not particularly surprising) seemed determined to do everything it could to deter the rugby watcher. An England game was suddenly switched off and the dual TV system went over to some God-forsaken Championship football match and the racing from Haydock. "No one's interested," came the explanation from the misery of the bar owner, which came as a shock to those who were. He was left, studying the form for the racing in his copy of "The Sun", as the rugby deprived trooped off to find another bar.
Rugby, like cricket but unlike football, requires an intimate acquaintance with rules that not even the true fan, let alone the players, really understands. Furthermore, it is such a whirr of big blokes smashing into each other, that no one has much idea what is actually going on, and no one can follow the ball, which seems at times to be largely incidental to the game itself.
But for the completely uninitiated, suddenly captivated by the possibility and excitement of England winning something, it is a total mystery, which nevertheless demands a running commentary of incomprehension interspersed by matters unrelated to what's happening on the plasma screen. I give you, therefore, the ladies' view of rugby, as it was during the 2007 final, with occasional male interjections to offer a correction or information:
"Ooh-ooh, come on, push them. That’s good, ooh-ooh, what’s happened? He’s good, who’s he? Tait. Ooh-ooh, come on guys, what was that for? Too many tackles? No that’s League. I am trying you know. Ooh-ooh, that was good. Who’s he? Robinson. I like him. That was good. What’s happening now? Did you breast feed? That was a try. Who was that? Ooh-ooh, Steyn, he’s good. But he’s not one of ours. Isn’t he? Oh no, come on guys, well, George got this allergic reaction to eggs. What’s happened now? Who’s this referee? He’s Argentinian. Ooh-ooh, push him. Oh look he’s pushed him into that camera. England are better. Ooh-ooh. Oh, is it over?"
Sadly of course, England failed in their attempt to win the last World Cup. But four years before. Four years before. Matt Dawson's incursions, Jonny Wilkinson's drop goal, Mike Catt's boot into the terraces. England had won, and a bar in Puerto Pollensa erupted. It must have been, I guess, one o'clock or later, thanks to the extra time. The pinting had been going on since mid-morning, and by the time that Catt kicked to touch, few could really make out what they were meant to be watching. All they could make out was that England had won, and it was therefore time for yet more pinting.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
A 10.30 local time kick-off. Too early for pinting? Not on your life. The rugby fan has a prodigious capacity for alcohol. Any time, day or night, it matters nought. Cometh the rugby, cometh the drinking. A match lasting eighty minutes. A game of two halves, and a game of at least four pints.
I became truly aware of the industrial amounts of beer that can be consumed in the name of rugby in 1978. Wales versus the All Blacks at Cardiff Arms Park. A match that ended in controversy, which was about the last thing I remembered before waking up the next morning in a bedroom that was unknown to me, in a house that was unknown to me, and in a house that wasn't in Cardiff. It was in fact somewhere in Somerset.
The obsessiveness of the true rugby devotee is as great if not greater than that of the most myopic of football fan. A then house mate of mine (who also happened to be captain of Wimbledon 1st XV) used to rise uncommonly early for him on a Saturday morning in order to watch the Lions tests against New Zealand in 1983. The early rise was doubly necessary; one, to watch the match and two, to prepare and then consume the entire contents of a supermarket by way of breakfast, liberally washed down with cans of Guinness.
For Bar Brits, the opportunities await during the World Cup. Other matches may start at eight local time, but there will be hordes of thirsty and hungry rugby aficionados banging on the shutters demanding extra full breakfasts and several large, foaming drinks. It should be rugby gold for the next few weeks.
This said, not every bar benefits from a rugby audience. During the 2007 competition, one particular bar, no longer with us (and not particularly surprising) seemed determined to do everything it could to deter the rugby watcher. An England game was suddenly switched off and the dual TV system went over to some God-forsaken Championship football match and the racing from Haydock. "No one's interested," came the explanation from the misery of the bar owner, which came as a shock to those who were. He was left, studying the form for the racing in his copy of "The Sun", as the rugby deprived trooped off to find another bar.
Rugby, like cricket but unlike football, requires an intimate acquaintance with rules that not even the true fan, let alone the players, really understands. Furthermore, it is such a whirr of big blokes smashing into each other, that no one has much idea what is actually going on, and no one can follow the ball, which seems at times to be largely incidental to the game itself.
But for the completely uninitiated, suddenly captivated by the possibility and excitement of England winning something, it is a total mystery, which nevertheless demands a running commentary of incomprehension interspersed by matters unrelated to what's happening on the plasma screen. I give you, therefore, the ladies' view of rugby, as it was during the 2007 final, with occasional male interjections to offer a correction or information:
"Ooh-ooh, come on, push them. That’s good, ooh-ooh, what’s happened? He’s good, who’s he? Tait. Ooh-ooh, come on guys, what was that for? Too many tackles? No that’s League. I am trying you know. Ooh-ooh, that was good. Who’s he? Robinson. I like him. That was good. What’s happening now? Did you breast feed? That was a try. Who was that? Ooh-ooh, Steyn, he’s good. But he’s not one of ours. Isn’t he? Oh no, come on guys, well, George got this allergic reaction to eggs. What’s happened now? Who’s this referee? He’s Argentinian. Ooh-ooh, push him. Oh look he’s pushed him into that camera. England are better. Ooh-ooh. Oh, is it over?"
Sadly of course, England failed in their attempt to win the last World Cup. But four years before. Four years before. Matt Dawson's incursions, Jonny Wilkinson's drop goal, Mike Catt's boot into the terraces. England had won, and a bar in Puerto Pollensa erupted. It must have been, I guess, one o'clock or later, thanks to the extra time. The pinting had been going on since mid-morning, and by the time that Catt kicked to touch, few could really make out what they were meant to be watching. All they could make out was that England had won, and it was therefore time for yet more pinting.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Tuesday, February 08, 2011
Nights On The Tiles
The truth that dare not speak its name.
A survey - yes, another one - finds that 80% of Brits between the ages of 16 and 35 come to Mallorca for one reason: nightlife. Well, not just one reason. There's also the matter of cheap booze. Two reasons then. You can add the other ones; they're not so difficult to figure out. Three reasons. No, four. Four reasons. No one expects the Spanish immoderation.
The same survey discovers, disquietingly, that 22% of Brits (female, one assumes) have in some way been sexually accosted while on holiday in Mallorca. I make no comment, other than that it comes as no surprise. Nor does the revelation that 71% are drunk for half the time, albeit that this seems on the low side.
You feel that behind these findings there is the unstated sound of self-deflecting and holier-than-thou disgust. You wonder quite what motivates Spanish surveys into the behaviour of British (and also, it must be added, German) youth. It's as though a Philistine pursuit of hedonistic nightlifing, too much alcohol and sex are reserved for the marauding hordes of northern Europe. It is, of course, far from the truth.
Barely audible but barely undisguised though this disgust may be, it is highly vocal compared with the truth that dare not be spoken. It is the truth that, for Brit and German youth - and older others whom tourism grandees might prefer to think have other things on their minds - going out at night and drinking are very important.
Getting off their faces and getting laid may be more the preserve of the younger end of the tourism masses - the younger end formerly known as the 18-30 crowd, now younger and older - but there was another survey, one that came out last summer, which found something very similar to this latest one. Of 3,000 tourists - of different ages - this reported that 80% of Brits (the good old 80% again) go to a night bar, club or disco on five or more nights during their stay. Nightlife is not just for the young, and that survey proved the point.
The truth that dare not speak its name is that for the great majority of tourists the priority is not figuring out which damn cell Chopin did or didn't live in; it is not admiring the interior of Palma Cathedral; it is not scrutinising some dust and bits of old stone at the excavations of Alcúdia's Roman town. It is going out. On the razz. On the lash. On the tiles. It is karaoke, trib acts. End of. It is into the wee small hours with a thumping musical accompaniment and next morning's thumping head. End of. Culture is the trip to the market. Excursions are to Pirates. End of. The priority is enjoying yourself. Having fun. It is what, for many, many tourists, holidays are about.
I said the other day that a mistake is made in referring to the "tourism market", as though it were one unified body of humanity. The other mistake is in referring to tourists as tourists. They are holidaymakers. There is a difference in terms of emphasis. One implies going out and having a good time, having a laugh, having some bevvies. I leave you to conclude which one.
The truth that dare not speak its name is that Mallorca has forgotten that people come on holiday. Consequently, the mindset, when it comes, for example, to promotion, is one quite removed from the experiences, the wishes, the motivations of great numbers of holidaymakers, the hoi polloi of the current-day Hi-de-Hi transported to the sun. And this isn't just the "yoof". Anything but.
This survey will be used as a stick with which to beat the drunkard Brit generation, as though such a thing had not previously existed. I can testify to the fact that it did. But it should be looked at more objectively. Combined with the other survey, it says much about what Mallorca represents. This may not be what tourism officialdom would like to think it represents, but it is. This may not be the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth where Mallorca's tourism is concerned, but it is a truth nevertheless. Just that they don't want to speak it.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
A survey - yes, another one - finds that 80% of Brits between the ages of 16 and 35 come to Mallorca for one reason: nightlife. Well, not just one reason. There's also the matter of cheap booze. Two reasons then. You can add the other ones; they're not so difficult to figure out. Three reasons. No, four. Four reasons. No one expects the Spanish immoderation.
The same survey discovers, disquietingly, that 22% of Brits (female, one assumes) have in some way been sexually accosted while on holiday in Mallorca. I make no comment, other than that it comes as no surprise. Nor does the revelation that 71% are drunk for half the time, albeit that this seems on the low side.
You feel that behind these findings there is the unstated sound of self-deflecting and holier-than-thou disgust. You wonder quite what motivates Spanish surveys into the behaviour of British (and also, it must be added, German) youth. It's as though a Philistine pursuit of hedonistic nightlifing, too much alcohol and sex are reserved for the marauding hordes of northern Europe. It is, of course, far from the truth.
Barely audible but barely undisguised though this disgust may be, it is highly vocal compared with the truth that dare not be spoken. It is the truth that, for Brit and German youth - and older others whom tourism grandees might prefer to think have other things on their minds - going out at night and drinking are very important.
Getting off their faces and getting laid may be more the preserve of the younger end of the tourism masses - the younger end formerly known as the 18-30 crowd, now younger and older - but there was another survey, one that came out last summer, which found something very similar to this latest one. Of 3,000 tourists - of different ages - this reported that 80% of Brits (the good old 80% again) go to a night bar, club or disco on five or more nights during their stay. Nightlife is not just for the young, and that survey proved the point.
The truth that dare not speak its name is that for the great majority of tourists the priority is not figuring out which damn cell Chopin did or didn't live in; it is not admiring the interior of Palma Cathedral; it is not scrutinising some dust and bits of old stone at the excavations of Alcúdia's Roman town. It is going out. On the razz. On the lash. On the tiles. It is karaoke, trib acts. End of. It is into the wee small hours with a thumping musical accompaniment and next morning's thumping head. End of. Culture is the trip to the market. Excursions are to Pirates. End of. The priority is enjoying yourself. Having fun. It is what, for many, many tourists, holidays are about.
I said the other day that a mistake is made in referring to the "tourism market", as though it were one unified body of humanity. The other mistake is in referring to tourists as tourists. They are holidaymakers. There is a difference in terms of emphasis. One implies going out and having a good time, having a laugh, having some bevvies. I leave you to conclude which one.
The truth that dare not speak its name is that Mallorca has forgotten that people come on holiday. Consequently, the mindset, when it comes, for example, to promotion, is one quite removed from the experiences, the wishes, the motivations of great numbers of holidaymakers, the hoi polloi of the current-day Hi-de-Hi transported to the sun. And this isn't just the "yoof". Anything but.
This survey will be used as a stick with which to beat the drunkard Brit generation, as though such a thing had not previously existed. I can testify to the fact that it did. But it should be looked at more objectively. Combined with the other survey, it says much about what Mallorca represents. This may not be what tourism officialdom would like to think it represents, but it is. This may not be the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth where Mallorca's tourism is concerned, but it is a truth nevertheless. Just that they don't want to speak it.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Friday, September 26, 2008
Did You Have To Pay That Fine?
And so, as I referred to briefly yesterday, there is a whole raft of street activities in Alcúdia that are to be outlawed, restricted and subject to fines. Much of this, one suspects, comes as a consequence of the complaints that were submitted to the town hall in respect of illegal street selling by legitimate traders along The Mile. But not all.
The headline targets of the new by-law (and I'm not sure when it applies from, but I guess it takes immediate effect) are the unauthorised street sellers. The report on all this from "The Diario" says that the unauthorised sale of food, drink and "other products" by the sellers will be subject to fines to 500 euros. As importantly, purchasers of these various products will also be liable to the same fine. Where do we start with this?
By other products, they mean this as a catch-all for the different things available from the lucky-lucky men and others who operate without any licences; this may well also include the women doing the hair braiding, though strictly speaking they are selling a service as opposed to a product. Whatever. But the really important bit of all this is that you, be you tourist or resident, can be fined for buying the stuff. Notwithstanding the question as to how well all this may be policed, if some poor tourist - ignorant of the by-law - forks out for a pair of dodgy sunglasses, he is likely to have his collar felt. Then what? Does he pay on the spot? Is he taken to court? How is this going to work? Will he even have 500 euros?
Do these other products include the crack? I imagine there are rather stricter sanctions than a 500 euro fine for this. And when the by-law refers to the "via pública" (public highway), does this mean that sales which occur in bars or on terraces or on the beach are exempt? The report refers also to "public space", so perhaps this does indeed mean all these non-street locations. There is no mention of bar owners being fined for allowing the trade, which is probably just as well. Any number of these bar owners already tell the lucksters to bugger off, but they can't necessarily be constantly vigilant or spend all their time haranguing them.
There are various other things covered by this by-law. Street prostitution, its offer and acceptance, begging, windscreen cleaners, loud music from cars are all subject to fines; restrictions, whatever they are, will be imposed on the likes of street painting and skateboarding. (No mention, note, of other potential street and indeed road hazards, such as Segways or trikes.) Then there is the drinking of alcohol in the streets. This is now banned. Mainly, this is to tackle what has been a growing problem of "botellón" parties whereby youngsters (mainly youngsters) get rat-arsed in the street at the weekend. Go to the area around the Magic Roundabout on a Friday or Saturday night, and you can begin to appreciate the problem. Getting cheap booze from a shop and then gathering with your mates in the street to the accompaniment of that loud music in cars is a cheap way of getting off your face prior to heading off to the clubs. And then there is the mess.
But street drinking has a tourist dimension. Here's an example. The other day, walking past the all-inclusive Piscis hotel in the port, I saw a group, each with a plastic glass of beer, coming out of the hotel and wandering off in the direction of the marina. It may have lacked class, but I doubt they were about to go and raise hell. Would the same group now know they are breaking the law? Going all-inclusive would no longer be the cheap option if a group of four got a collective fine of perhaps a couple of grand, and that could be higher if there happened to be a "minor" present. What is the public highway and public space in this regard? Go down to Bellevue at night and all manner of people are meandering about with drinks, such as on the "boulevard" that cuts between the two parts of the complex. But the boulevard is public highway. Does the "public space" mean that if one cracks open a can of Saint Mick on the beach, the long arm of the law will be stretched out clasping a ticket for a fine of a few hundred euros? The report does emphasise the botellón element, which is what the town hall is really keen to stamp out, so there may well be some discretion in all of this, but it says that "alcohol is not to be consumed in the street". Give plod half a chance ...
Much of what the town hall is introducing is perfectly understandable, but I wonder if they've thought it through. Apart from anything else, they are going to have to make it pretty damn clear to tourists - and tour operators and reps and hotels are going to have to be party to this as well - that things like buying illegal goods or quaffing a cold drink of alcoholic content in the streets (and possibly on the beach) are liable to cop them a fine.
And then there are the things that don't seem to be covered. Well one. Scratch cards. These may well be touted with licences, but when the town hall can invoke the "nuisance" of other practices now deemed punishable by a fine, have they not overlooked the nuisance factor of the scratch-cardists? One other point, the sale of illegal goods by the likes of the lucky-lucky men has always been subject to punishment. The mere nature of the goods, pirated goods, makes their sale illegal, as does the absence of a licence, the absence of a tax number, the absence of a permission to engage in a business activity. And where has all that got us up to now?
The new measures to rid the streets of Alcúdia of the various problems they seek to tackle could all be good news. But if they result in the occasional purge without sufficient information, the danger is that Alcúdia will not benefit from what it might hope will be good publicity for cleaning its act up but from the negative publicity of numbers of poor tourists being handed large fines. I hope the town hall and the police tread warily.
For those who understand Spanish, I link here the full article from "The Diario":
http://www.diariodemallorca.es/secciones/noticia.jsp?pRef=2008092500_3_395402__PART-FORANA-Comprar-vendedor-ambulante-sancionara-multas-hasta-euros
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - The Asteroids Galaxy Tour: http://es.youtube.com/watch?v=UTuAXV8WyuI or http://www.theasteroidsgalaxytour.com/. Today's title - from a song with a girl's name; girl, big hair.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
The headline targets of the new by-law (and I'm not sure when it applies from, but I guess it takes immediate effect) are the unauthorised street sellers. The report on all this from "The Diario" says that the unauthorised sale of food, drink and "other products" by the sellers will be subject to fines to 500 euros. As importantly, purchasers of these various products will also be liable to the same fine. Where do we start with this?
By other products, they mean this as a catch-all for the different things available from the lucky-lucky men and others who operate without any licences; this may well also include the women doing the hair braiding, though strictly speaking they are selling a service as opposed to a product. Whatever. But the really important bit of all this is that you, be you tourist or resident, can be fined for buying the stuff. Notwithstanding the question as to how well all this may be policed, if some poor tourist - ignorant of the by-law - forks out for a pair of dodgy sunglasses, he is likely to have his collar felt. Then what? Does he pay on the spot? Is he taken to court? How is this going to work? Will he even have 500 euros?
Do these other products include the crack? I imagine there are rather stricter sanctions than a 500 euro fine for this. And when the by-law refers to the "via pública" (public highway), does this mean that sales which occur in bars or on terraces or on the beach are exempt? The report refers also to "public space", so perhaps this does indeed mean all these non-street locations. There is no mention of bar owners being fined for allowing the trade, which is probably just as well. Any number of these bar owners already tell the lucksters to bugger off, but they can't necessarily be constantly vigilant or spend all their time haranguing them.
There are various other things covered by this by-law. Street prostitution, its offer and acceptance, begging, windscreen cleaners, loud music from cars are all subject to fines; restrictions, whatever they are, will be imposed on the likes of street painting and skateboarding. (No mention, note, of other potential street and indeed road hazards, such as Segways or trikes.) Then there is the drinking of alcohol in the streets. This is now banned. Mainly, this is to tackle what has been a growing problem of "botellón" parties whereby youngsters (mainly youngsters) get rat-arsed in the street at the weekend. Go to the area around the Magic Roundabout on a Friday or Saturday night, and you can begin to appreciate the problem. Getting cheap booze from a shop and then gathering with your mates in the street to the accompaniment of that loud music in cars is a cheap way of getting off your face prior to heading off to the clubs. And then there is the mess.
But street drinking has a tourist dimension. Here's an example. The other day, walking past the all-inclusive Piscis hotel in the port, I saw a group, each with a plastic glass of beer, coming out of the hotel and wandering off in the direction of the marina. It may have lacked class, but I doubt they were about to go and raise hell. Would the same group now know they are breaking the law? Going all-inclusive would no longer be the cheap option if a group of four got a collective fine of perhaps a couple of grand, and that could be higher if there happened to be a "minor" present. What is the public highway and public space in this regard? Go down to Bellevue at night and all manner of people are meandering about with drinks, such as on the "boulevard" that cuts between the two parts of the complex. But the boulevard is public highway. Does the "public space" mean that if one cracks open a can of Saint Mick on the beach, the long arm of the law will be stretched out clasping a ticket for a fine of a few hundred euros? The report does emphasise the botellón element, which is what the town hall is really keen to stamp out, so there may well be some discretion in all of this, but it says that "alcohol is not to be consumed in the street". Give plod half a chance ...
Much of what the town hall is introducing is perfectly understandable, but I wonder if they've thought it through. Apart from anything else, they are going to have to make it pretty damn clear to tourists - and tour operators and reps and hotels are going to have to be party to this as well - that things like buying illegal goods or quaffing a cold drink of alcoholic content in the streets (and possibly on the beach) are liable to cop them a fine.
And then there are the things that don't seem to be covered. Well one. Scratch cards. These may well be touted with licences, but when the town hall can invoke the "nuisance" of other practices now deemed punishable by a fine, have they not overlooked the nuisance factor of the scratch-cardists? One other point, the sale of illegal goods by the likes of the lucky-lucky men has always been subject to punishment. The mere nature of the goods, pirated goods, makes their sale illegal, as does the absence of a licence, the absence of a tax number, the absence of a permission to engage in a business activity. And where has all that got us up to now?
The new measures to rid the streets of Alcúdia of the various problems they seek to tackle could all be good news. But if they result in the occasional purge without sufficient information, the danger is that Alcúdia will not benefit from what it might hope will be good publicity for cleaning its act up but from the negative publicity of numbers of poor tourists being handed large fines. I hope the town hall and the police tread warily.
For those who understand Spanish, I link here the full article from "The Diario":
http://www.diariodemallorca.es/secciones/noticia.jsp?pRef=2008092500_3_395402__PART-FORANA-Comprar-vendedor-ambulante-sancionara-multas-hasta-euros
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - The Asteroids Galaxy Tour: http://es.youtube.com/watch?v=UTuAXV8WyuI or http://www.theasteroidsgalaxytour.com/. Today's title - from a song with a girl's name; girl, big hair.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
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