My first, for want of a better description, "business mentor" liked to describe things as a lemon. He was one of the mid-European Jews who fled the Nazis and ultimately created a thriving business in England - and no, he wasn't Robert Maxwell. He would say to me: "all you end up viz, Endy, is a lemon." He used it primarily in connection with market research and especially surveys and questionnaires, and the fact that their results added up to little or to mixed messages from which you could divine little - hence the lemon. A later sort-of mentor, one time the youngest professor of marketing in the UK, would have disagreed. Indeed he once sent me a stiff memo taking me to task for an editorial about the function of market surveys. He did, though, know a thing or two about market research and questionnaires; in fact, he wrote the book, or one of them at any rate.
Lemons and function of surveys came to mind as I looked at the questionnaire for tourists from Pollensa town hall. I suspect that one function, if not the function, is that of market research as PR; being seen to be attempting to engage with the tourist by, God forbid, asking for his or her opinion. Fair enough, but what do they do with the results, if anything. A clue may lie with the word "may". At the top of the questionnaire it says that "this may help us to improve our service". Not will, but may. The questionnaire, or a variant thereof, has been doing the rounds for a few years now. Have results ever been published or acted upon? Maybe they have, in which case it would be nice to know where and how. You know that highly publicised but highly useless tourism website for Pollensa - www.pollensa.com - that might be a good place. Don't hold your breath.
Setting aside the misspelling of accommodation (one "m") and the presence of the dubious "professionality", the questionnaire is not wholly weak. It uses the "grade from 1 to 10" style to ask about things that can, I guess, be graded, e.g. "quality of beaches", though which ones is another matter. But some of it ... . The visitor is, for example, asked to grade "food shopping facilities", "non-food shopping facilities" and then "staff professionality", presumably of these food and non-food shopping facilities. Why? And what is going to happen if that "professionality" is deemed to be low? Is someone going to issue a stern reprimand to the check-out girls at Eroski or a sales assistant in a souvenir shop? And how exactly is one supposed to respond to the request to grade the "price/quality ratio of installations in your accomodation" (sic)? What does it mean anyway?
What do they do with answers yes or no to "have you noticed any changes since your last stay". It would be hugely surprising if there hadn't been any changes; it's pointless. Or ... "did you know that the island has its own language and culture?" "Which one?" It may not be unreasonable to ask about the language, but culture? Cultures exist everywhere; it's a daft question. I could go on.
If the town hall was serious about finding out about tourists' views, they would regularly book rooms in hotels, invite tourists along with the incentive of buckets of free sangria and spend an hour doing some sort of focus group. But in truth, they don't need to. If they bothered to go to the internet sites, they would find much of what they need to know. And then still not do anything with the information.
Lemons? It's the whole tree.
Postcards from Mallorca
And so the article yet again did not appear in "The Bulletin" - the one about Alcúdia bar owners and all-inclusives. I give up, though I reiterate that I personally am not bothered if it is chosen to appear or not. But to add salt to the wound of the apparent indifference and the publicity given to Calvia bar owners, yesterday's paper had a page devoted - once more - to John bloody Bercow and one to something called the Deyá (aka Deià) postcard. How many British residents are registered in Deià? 74. How many in Alcúdia? 874.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Echo & The Bunnymen: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLX_6WwXFUI. Today's title - well, go on take your pick as to this one.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Showing posts with label Bar owners. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bar owners. Show all posts
Monday, June 29, 2009
Monday, June 22, 2009
Join Our Club
Are you clubbable? By which I mean are you someone who likes to be part of a club or an association? You would be in your element in Mallorca if you were. You would almost certainly be in the press as well.
Two new associations have sprung up over the past few days. The first is something called "Europeos por Europa", an apparently non-politically-aligned group dedicated to getting non-Spanish "Europeans" together to act as some form of lobby group. There are already two similar organisations. When this latest one met, there were, according to "The Bulletin", people from all over the island. Maybe so; maybe they were mates of the protagonists. This was hardly a mass movement.
What is the point of this? Well, the ultimate point of it may be that there is more of a political element than is being said; I'm told that a political party may well be the goal in the not-too-distant future. Who cares? Only those who harbour political ambition or spend their lives hopping in and out of bed with different associations. The associationist (sic) is driven by a variety of motives - political, altruistic, self-interest, genuine concern/interest, nothing better to do, self-importance, whatever. The associationist cannot be characterised by one thing alone, save for the impulse to be an associationist. There are an awful lot of people who are not. Like Groucho Marx, they do not want to belong to clubs that would accept them as members. In fact, they don't even think this. They are just not interested.
Is there a need for such a group, political or apolitical? One issue that does apparently exercise the minds of "Europeans" is the matter of residency cards. These are now no longer issued. Instead, a certificate is obtained, meaning that the passport is required as identity. It is an inconvenience, but it is hardly the important matter that it has been made out to be. Indeed anything that kicks at the identity-card culture should be welcomed.
The impetus for the change in residency documentation was not Spanish; it came from Europe, which makes this latest group seem a tad ironic. The thinking, albeit ridiculous, was that as the British do not have identity cards (yet), then they should not be discriminated against by having to have one in Spain. From this came the idea that, if not the British, then no Europeans, other than the Spanish. It makes no sense, but then there is much that makes no sense in Spain. It was a matter, though, of such importance that local politicians, when canvassing for support during the recent European elections, confessed to being unaware of it, but that they would of course be doing something about it were they to be elected.
But the Europeos por Europa association has duly been given its place in the publicity sun by the press, though it may yet sink, like so many, into the obscurity of indifference. Which brings me to the second association - one for bar owners in Calvia. It too has enjoyed the glare of press publicity. If it proves one thing, it is that the formation of an association is more likely to guarantee that glare. On Friday "The Bulletin" front-paged with a story about the problems of Calvia's bar owners - and then followed this the next day with another one. There was, I was told, to be another story, one about bar owners in Alcúdia. You might remember this being mentioned a few days ago. I wrote that story. It has not appeared.
Editorial content is entirely discretionary. Perhaps the story was not good enough. Perhaps it was too much of a familiar theme (all-inclusives). Perhaps it just wasn't what was wanted. Yet it was "probably" going to be included on Saturday. It wasn't. A bar worker (not one who had been involved with the story) said to me that he had been expecting the article, as he had seen the mention on this blog. He then added that it was typical. Calvia, Palma, yes; Alcúdia, no. Much as I have sought to defend the paper against an accusation of southern bias, I do have to wonder. Just to go back to that meeting of all those people for Europeos por Europa from across the island. Where was the article about this meeting featured? In the Calvia spotlight section. That's where. If it genuinely was something for the island, it would have stood alone. It did not. That bar worker may have a point.
Let me say that I do not feel slighted if the article does not appear. But it would be nice to know why it hasn't. Perhaps the answer lies in forming an association of bar owners in Alcúdia. Then maybe the paper would take some notice. Or maybe not.
QUIZ
Today's title - more old favourites of this blog; French name.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Two new associations have sprung up over the past few days. The first is something called "Europeos por Europa", an apparently non-politically-aligned group dedicated to getting non-Spanish "Europeans" together to act as some form of lobby group. There are already two similar organisations. When this latest one met, there were, according to "The Bulletin", people from all over the island. Maybe so; maybe they were mates of the protagonists. This was hardly a mass movement.
What is the point of this? Well, the ultimate point of it may be that there is more of a political element than is being said; I'm told that a political party may well be the goal in the not-too-distant future. Who cares? Only those who harbour political ambition or spend their lives hopping in and out of bed with different associations. The associationist (sic) is driven by a variety of motives - political, altruistic, self-interest, genuine concern/interest, nothing better to do, self-importance, whatever. The associationist cannot be characterised by one thing alone, save for the impulse to be an associationist. There are an awful lot of people who are not. Like Groucho Marx, they do not want to belong to clubs that would accept them as members. In fact, they don't even think this. They are just not interested.
Is there a need for such a group, political or apolitical? One issue that does apparently exercise the minds of "Europeans" is the matter of residency cards. These are now no longer issued. Instead, a certificate is obtained, meaning that the passport is required as identity. It is an inconvenience, but it is hardly the important matter that it has been made out to be. Indeed anything that kicks at the identity-card culture should be welcomed.
The impetus for the change in residency documentation was not Spanish; it came from Europe, which makes this latest group seem a tad ironic. The thinking, albeit ridiculous, was that as the British do not have identity cards (yet), then they should not be discriminated against by having to have one in Spain. From this came the idea that, if not the British, then no Europeans, other than the Spanish. It makes no sense, but then there is much that makes no sense in Spain. It was a matter, though, of such importance that local politicians, when canvassing for support during the recent European elections, confessed to being unaware of it, but that they would of course be doing something about it were they to be elected.
But the Europeos por Europa association has duly been given its place in the publicity sun by the press, though it may yet sink, like so many, into the obscurity of indifference. Which brings me to the second association - one for bar owners in Calvia. It too has enjoyed the glare of press publicity. If it proves one thing, it is that the formation of an association is more likely to guarantee that glare. On Friday "The Bulletin" front-paged with a story about the problems of Calvia's bar owners - and then followed this the next day with another one. There was, I was told, to be another story, one about bar owners in Alcúdia. You might remember this being mentioned a few days ago. I wrote that story. It has not appeared.
Editorial content is entirely discretionary. Perhaps the story was not good enough. Perhaps it was too much of a familiar theme (all-inclusives). Perhaps it just wasn't what was wanted. Yet it was "probably" going to be included on Saturday. It wasn't. A bar worker (not one who had been involved with the story) said to me that he had been expecting the article, as he had seen the mention on this blog. He then added that it was typical. Calvia, Palma, yes; Alcúdia, no. Much as I have sought to defend the paper against an accusation of southern bias, I do have to wonder. Just to go back to that meeting of all those people for Europeos por Europa from across the island. Where was the article about this meeting featured? In the Calvia spotlight section. That's where. If it genuinely was something for the island, it would have stood alone. It did not. That bar worker may have a point.
Let me say that I do not feel slighted if the article does not appear. But it would be nice to know why it hasn't. Perhaps the answer lies in forming an association of bar owners in Alcúdia. Then maybe the paper would take some notice. Or maybe not.
QUIZ
Today's title - more old favourites of this blog; French name.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Nothing Compares
There is of course the other side to what I was saying on the 24th ("Gissa Job"), and that relates to the unreliable employer. The one who one minute has employed someone and the next has the whim to take on someone else instead or to decide that no job actually exists. It does work both ways. And there is also what one might call a fitness-for-purpose test for bar owners, both potential and extant. I remember once speaking about this, but I was reminded of it when someone said to me that, especially amidst the current economic downturn and a general view that there is likely to be a shake-out in terms of the number of bars, it might not be a bad thing if some bar owners/workers were a bit more friendly. A smile does actually go a long way. The fitness-for-purpose goes beyond just this. It is a whole personality and attitudinal issue. A bar may not amount to a great deal, but friendliness, personal presentation and interest in the customer can compensate hugely.
There is a list of questions that the customer will almost invariably have. It comprises - do you live here, how long have you been here, what's it like, what's the weather going to do, where's the best place to change currency, how do I get to... ? The bar as unofficial tourist information office. But once through that checklist, having satisfied the quest for knowledge, who is then more important - the customer or the bar owner? There is but one answer. Yet one hears of instances where, for example, an owner will give a life history at some considerable length. No-one cares, other than that owner. And the reason is that the thing people like talking about most is themselves. This does not of course preclude the good tale to be told and one with which to amuse the punters, but the lesson from course 101 in how to do small talk is that the other person and what the other person has to say is always more important.
Where the language barrier exists, there is still no reason why a customer has to be treated with what at times can seem like suspicion. Some local Spanish bars can give off this impression. Not all, but some. And then there are the restaurants. The vogue is for restaurant chic, a movement towards a certain sterility, a place of eating to be admired rather than one in which to feel comfortable, one often with too much intrusive hovering as opposed to the art of the waiter making him or herself almost disappear but being constantly alert. There is much to be said for places that retain a sense of being lived-in. Would you rather live in a house that has that sense or one that has the everything-in-the-right-placeness vacuity and stiffness of a showroom? Well everything can be in the right place, and indeed should be, but can still give off what the locals like to refer to as "ambiente familiar" which can mean family or informal atmosphere - and is the latter that is usually meant. Now we also have the ubiquity of "chill", even if it is just the music. This is a de rigueur me-too, a suffusion of cool amid the fusion; a designer concept of dining alienation. From bar owners to restaurant atmospheres, nothing compares to personality, and personality above all.
The Eroski Hole
How long has it been? Eighteen months? Longer. The hole at the exit some say entrance to the car park at the Eroski by the Platja d'Or is an ex-hole. It is now a whole hole.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Suzanne Vega, "Tom's Diner" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GQyjEXuvbqA). Today's title - all-time classic.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
There is a list of questions that the customer will almost invariably have. It comprises - do you live here, how long have you been here, what's it like, what's the weather going to do, where's the best place to change currency, how do I get to... ? The bar as unofficial tourist information office. But once through that checklist, having satisfied the quest for knowledge, who is then more important - the customer or the bar owner? There is but one answer. Yet one hears of instances where, for example, an owner will give a life history at some considerable length. No-one cares, other than that owner. And the reason is that the thing people like talking about most is themselves. This does not of course preclude the good tale to be told and one with which to amuse the punters, but the lesson from course 101 in how to do small talk is that the other person and what the other person has to say is always more important.
Where the language barrier exists, there is still no reason why a customer has to be treated with what at times can seem like suspicion. Some local Spanish bars can give off this impression. Not all, but some. And then there are the restaurants. The vogue is for restaurant chic, a movement towards a certain sterility, a place of eating to be admired rather than one in which to feel comfortable, one often with too much intrusive hovering as opposed to the art of the waiter making him or herself almost disappear but being constantly alert. There is much to be said for places that retain a sense of being lived-in. Would you rather live in a house that has that sense or one that has the everything-in-the-right-placeness vacuity and stiffness of a showroom? Well everything can be in the right place, and indeed should be, but can still give off what the locals like to refer to as "ambiente familiar" which can mean family or informal atmosphere - and is the latter that is usually meant. Now we also have the ubiquity of "chill", even if it is just the music. This is a de rigueur me-too, a suffusion of cool amid the fusion; a designer concept of dining alienation. From bar owners to restaurant atmospheres, nothing compares to personality, and personality above all.
The Eroski Hole
How long has it been? Eighteen months? Longer. The hole at the exit some say entrance to the car park at the Eroski by the Platja d'Or is an ex-hole. It is now a whole hole.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Suzanne Vega, "Tom's Diner" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GQyjEXuvbqA). Today's title - all-time classic.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
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