"Busquets for Mallorca" wasn't the headline. Not quite anyway. The Barcelona holding (aka defensive) midfielder was not being enticed from the Camp Nou with a promise of slumming it in front of one man and his dog when Real Mallorca head for places never previously heard of that host football teams in the Segunda B (Grupo 3). No, it wasn't that Busquets. It wasn't even a male. It was female and it was a Bel.
Finding a replacement (replacements) for Our Man Not In Havana But Punta Cana, Biel Barceló, has been proving to be less straightforward than might have been imagined. It hasn't been a simple case of dotting i's and crossing t's. Oh, that it were. No i has been dotted; instead it has been deleted altogether. From Biel to Bel. Barceló to Busquets. The Més B&B seems destined to continue. Or is it?
It is eminently possible that you have never heard of Bel. If you haven't, I really can't blame you. Bel's possible ascent to the vice-presidency sums up the mess that Més have got into because of Biel's jaunt to the Dominican Republic. Putting it bluntly, Més is not a party overflowing with political big-hitters; it is instead populated with dwarves tossed into a spotlight of slightly less than 14% share of the vote. It has basically been Biel and hardly anyone else. There is the wild man, David Abril, though there will be many who would prefer that there wasn't, and Més also have Mick of the Council. But he is more than content to remain Mick of the Council, president of the self-appointed Government of Mallorca.
Bel, who has been shadowing the wild man as Més joint spokesperson, has risen from rightful obscurity to be the number one for the VP's job: number one where Més are concerned, and no one else. In fact, it isn't really true to say that she's number one throughout Més. It had looked as if Mother Santiago, Fina, was nailed on for the VP gig, but then someone pointed out that she wasn't from the PSM Majorcan Socialists wing of Més. Mother was once with the communists, as was the wild man. The PSM said no to Mother, which must therefore draw into huge question her chances of being Més presidential candidate come 2019.
For Més, Bel would be a safe pair of hands - or safe pair of feet, if you prefer - in a holding midfield role of the unspectacular and indeed anonymous. The party is desperate to hold itself together and hope that it can limp towards the next election having regained credibility, most of which has disappeared along with ministerial and senior official names over the past nine months. In the process, however, it is still doing its utmost to portray itself as a self-interested shambles: say no to Bel and there'll be no acceptance of next year's budget, so there.
It is transparently obvious that neither Sweet and Friendly Francina nor Podemos have been overly enamoured of the Bel proposal for VP. Més have maintained that Bel is non-negotiable. The i must be dotted prior to deletion, and Bel will be the belle of the Balearic government ball - in a holding midfield role.
* And what do you know, Bel does indeed appear to be the belle. The confirmation was made yesterday amidst an undeniable air of reluctance on behalf of PSOE.