Google Translate is a wonderful tool. Wonderful, that is, for the howlers it produces. My advice: steer clear of Google Translate, unless you want to be held up to ridicule, or if you don't steer clear, do not, under any circumstances, take it as the final (strangely translated) word.
Google Translate is a machine. It is the Captain Larry Dart of cyberspace. An unseen on-chest translator of the type that "Space Patrol" deployed in order to turn Martian into perfectly comprehensible English with a mechanical-sounding, mid-Atlantic drawl. Larry Dart's translator had one advantage over Google Translate. It was generally correct, unless a technical hitch required the intervention of Galasphere 347's on-board boffin, Professor Heggarty.
One of Google Translate's biggest problems is that it cannot always make sense of verb conjugation. From Spanish to English, therefore, this means that the third person singular, as an example, comes out as he, she or even you, when none of these may actually apply (because it should be "it") or when he should be she, or vice versa.
This amusing little grammatical foible is nothing, however, when compared with what Google Translate does with some names. There is no doubting that as a tool, Google Translate has made more accessible information that is available only in Spanish, or indeed Catalan, to an English-speaking audience with only a rudimentary understanding of either language, if that. So it serves a useful purpose up to a point, but when whole tracts of articles or news items are then posted to the internet, some of the glaring errors scream out at you. As with some recent ones with a Pollensa angle.
Pollensa's mayor is Tomeu Cifre, but he isn't according to Google Translate. He is Tomeu Encrypt. In a way, it is appropriate. Mayors of most towns deal with speaking in code, a lack of transparency and obfuscation. In Santa Margalida, its mayor is Miguel Encrypt. The joke of the name of the local DJs, Two Many Cifres (nicked from 2 Many DJs and an observation on the fact that there are an awful lot of Cifres), would be an even better joke were they to name themselves Two Many Encrypts.
Other politicians suffer similar fates. Take tourism minister Carlos Delgado. Put Delgado into Google Translate - and on no account try this with Catalan to English, as he wouldn't like that at all (and besides which it wouldn't work) - and out pops Carlos Slim. In continuing the "Space Patrol" association, Slim was an elf-like creature from Venus on Galasphere 347. So maybe Delgado is in fact a Venusian. It would explain a lot. Delgado could also, so Google Translate informs us, be thin, flimsy or spidery. I leave it to you to apply your own preference.
The man in charge of the mega-ministry of agriculture, environment, land and transport, Gabriel Company, does not emerge in fully businesslike fashion from a Catalan to English Google translation. He is merely a companion or a colleague, but having recently renounced his independent status within the regional government's cabinet and become a card-carrying member of the Partido Popular, he is now a genuine PP companion and colleague, a transport minister who has become a fellow traveller.
Going back to Mayor Encrypt, the Pollensa one, his predecessor was Joan Cerdà. Joan offers an awful lot of scope when it comes to his English meaning, not all of it terribly complimentary. From Spanish, minus the accent, he is either hairy or porcine (and feminine porcine, to boot). Bristle or sow. Much as many like to poke fun, he is no pig in a poke. Cerdà, in Catalan terms, comes from someone who was a native of La Cerdanya in the Pyrenees.
It isn't only politicians of course who suffer fates of humiliation or nominal corruption by Google Translate. Who is the most famous Mallorcan of all? One of the world's greatest sportspeople. Rafael Nadal. Not quite. He is Rafael Christmas (though you do have to enter Nadal by itself to turn him into a yule-tide festival; Google Translate can sometimes cope with proper names and therefore not translate them).
Yes, Google Translate is a wonderful tool. One that offers hours of endless amusement. But Larry Dart's translator was still superior. What, though, would have happened had Galasphere 347 landed at a wintertime fiesta in Pollensa, overseen by Mayor Encrypt, and had Husky, its sausage-loving Martian crew member, consulted the Martian via Catalan to English translator? Botifarró? The mind boggles. Remarkably enough, though, Google Translate does it. Sausage. Just don't mention this to Pollensa's former mayor.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Showing posts with label Spanish. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Spanish. Show all posts
Monday, May 28, 2012
Thursday, July 14, 2011
The State We're In: Language
Should Mallorcan businesses get it right? Get English right? It was once put to me that it didn't matter and that mangled English was just all part of the charm. Possibly so, but possibly it is also a case of being lazy or of mistake reinforcing mistake.
There are any number of English speakers knocking around who might help a restaurant, a shop, an event, an estate agency from making a language gaffe. Are any ever asked to give a menu, some instructions, a sign the once-over, just to be sure? Some are, but there are plenty of businesses who still manage to mangle English. All part of the charm perhaps, but there is charm and there is being professional.
Recently, we had the priceless "rules" set out by the Pollensa Music Festival, under which, among other things, it was not allowed "to enter any type of container nor devices of telephony". We know what they were getting at, but a little bit of attention might have eliminated the potential for confusion or indeed hilarity.
There have been some wonderful mistakes that I have encountered over the years. A personal favourite remains the "flesh on the tenterhooks" of a grill restaurant. The owner said that the printers who had been responsible for the translation had insisted that they could do the English correctly. Which may be part of the problem; that of non-native speakers who fall into the language trap.
"Flesh on the tenterhooks" was, one presumed, meant to be something along the lines of tender meat, but it came out as sounding like an act of torture by the Inquisition. Tenterhooks, for the record, have nothing to do with cooking and everything to do with stretching cloth.
Making a complete balls-up has arguably been made more likely thanks to the Google translator and other machine translation systems. And when it comes to idioms and slang terms, of which there are an awful lot in English, such systems are almost completely useless.
Some mistakes, however, just keep on getting repeated. And a prime example is the "state agency"; not an agency of the state, but an estate agency. You can find many states that appear to be being traded by state agencies which should in fact be estate agencies.
A new sign appeared at one estate agency the other day, replete with the same old mistake. But why does it keep being made? Has no one ever pointed the mistake out? My guess is that "state" is so common that it is thought to be correct, not least by signmakers who will insist that it is correct as they have been in this state for years.
Proper names can also be problematic. In certain cases, they always have been. In Puerto Alcúdia, the recent fire at an apartment block caused a bit of a problem as to how it should be reported. The apartments have always lacked one letter. Who originally took the "p" out of the Mississipi (sic)? The same person possibly who didn't see the "c" in the Picadilly (sic) bar. Has anyone ever noticed the missing "n" that means that the Britania (sic) bar doesn't rule the waves? (The missing "p" might be put down to being Spanish, but then in Spanish there would be a missing "s" as well - twice over; Picadilly and Britania are Spanish, but their markets have been British.)
Not that these probably matter. Test your average Brit tourist and, nine times out of ten, he wouldn't know how to spell them anyway. And it's certainly not as though the language trap doesn't work in reverse or that borrowing from Spanish doesn't come into play.
Pop along to your nearest state agency, or preferably estate agency, and you might find a property that takes your fancy. However, the state agent tells you that it is in need of reform. Has it been a naughty boy? Is it to have its law changed? The widespread use of reform to mean altering a building in some way isn't, strictly speaking, correct usage. Incorrect or not, it is a good example of a word whose meaning has been borrowed from Spanish that, because of its generality, works rather better than correct English alternatives.
And the property needing reform might well be in an urbanisation, another specific adaptation from the Spanish to mean an estate, or should it be a state? Once reformed, the property may well become "perfect", states of perfection being more widely expressed by "perfecto" Spaniards and therefore also now by English-speaking adopters.
To answer my initial question though. Tell me. Should they get it right? Go on, tell me. I command you. The abrupt, somewhat impolite use of this imperative is something else that has passed from Spanish. "Digame". Tell me.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
There are any number of English speakers knocking around who might help a restaurant, a shop, an event, an estate agency from making a language gaffe. Are any ever asked to give a menu, some instructions, a sign the once-over, just to be sure? Some are, but there are plenty of businesses who still manage to mangle English. All part of the charm perhaps, but there is charm and there is being professional.
Recently, we had the priceless "rules" set out by the Pollensa Music Festival, under which, among other things, it was not allowed "to enter any type of container nor devices of telephony". We know what they were getting at, but a little bit of attention might have eliminated the potential for confusion or indeed hilarity.
There have been some wonderful mistakes that I have encountered over the years. A personal favourite remains the "flesh on the tenterhooks" of a grill restaurant. The owner said that the printers who had been responsible for the translation had insisted that they could do the English correctly. Which may be part of the problem; that of non-native speakers who fall into the language trap.
"Flesh on the tenterhooks" was, one presumed, meant to be something along the lines of tender meat, but it came out as sounding like an act of torture by the Inquisition. Tenterhooks, for the record, have nothing to do with cooking and everything to do with stretching cloth.
Making a complete balls-up has arguably been made more likely thanks to the Google translator and other machine translation systems. And when it comes to idioms and slang terms, of which there are an awful lot in English, such systems are almost completely useless.
Some mistakes, however, just keep on getting repeated. And a prime example is the "state agency"; not an agency of the state, but an estate agency. You can find many states that appear to be being traded by state agencies which should in fact be estate agencies.
A new sign appeared at one estate agency the other day, replete with the same old mistake. But why does it keep being made? Has no one ever pointed the mistake out? My guess is that "state" is so common that it is thought to be correct, not least by signmakers who will insist that it is correct as they have been in this state for years.
Proper names can also be problematic. In certain cases, they always have been. In Puerto Alcúdia, the recent fire at an apartment block caused a bit of a problem as to how it should be reported. The apartments have always lacked one letter. Who originally took the "p" out of the Mississipi (sic)? The same person possibly who didn't see the "c" in the Picadilly (sic) bar. Has anyone ever noticed the missing "n" that means that the Britania (sic) bar doesn't rule the waves? (The missing "p" might be put down to being Spanish, but then in Spanish there would be a missing "s" as well - twice over; Picadilly and Britania are Spanish, but their markets have been British.)
Not that these probably matter. Test your average Brit tourist and, nine times out of ten, he wouldn't know how to spell them anyway. And it's certainly not as though the language trap doesn't work in reverse or that borrowing from Spanish doesn't come into play.
Pop along to your nearest state agency, or preferably estate agency, and you might find a property that takes your fancy. However, the state agent tells you that it is in need of reform. Has it been a naughty boy? Is it to have its law changed? The widespread use of reform to mean altering a building in some way isn't, strictly speaking, correct usage. Incorrect or not, it is a good example of a word whose meaning has been borrowed from Spanish that, because of its generality, works rather better than correct English alternatives.
And the property needing reform might well be in an urbanisation, another specific adaptation from the Spanish to mean an estate, or should it be a state? Once reformed, the property may well become "perfect", states of perfection being more widely expressed by "perfecto" Spaniards and therefore also now by English-speaking adopters.
To answer my initial question though. Tell me. Should they get it right? Go on, tell me. I command you. The abrupt, somewhat impolite use of this imperative is something else that has passed from Spanish. "Digame". Tell me.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
These Words Are My Own
You know those Google ad things. Do you ever take any notice of them, let alone click on them? I don't. Well not normally. Only if there is the prospect of a potentially rich source of bloggism. And so it proved the other day. Up popped this thing for a Spanish language course. It said something along the lines of you only need 138 words of Spanish and you're quids in with the language. It didn't say that exactly of course, but it was the 138 that caught my eye. Why 138? Why not 150 or 200? There must be a psychology of greater credibility that demands the promotion of a seemingly inexplicable number, such as 138. Rather as Douglas Adams settled on 42, so the answer to everything Spanish is 138.
The site itself, and I'm damned if I'm mentioning it and giving it more publicity, was as you might expect. Great lists of testimonials of the I tried everything else and then found your course and now I speak the language so well I am the president of Spain variety. Again, I do exaggerate slightly. There was some mention of handing over folding notes through a credit-card transaction. 110 dollars I think it was. (Surely 138 would be more credible?) In return for this, you could download or get the CD or do whatever you are supposed to do with these things.
Now, I'm not saying that there may not be any merit in whatever system the site claims to promote. For all I know, you may indeed be fluent in a matter of weeks. But I do somewhat doubt it. One comes back to those 138 words. Apparently they're all you need to be conducting yourself in Spanish. No need for any boring old grammar. People do not learn languages through the grammar approach, it says. Language teachers don't like the grammar approach, it adds.
Up to a point, this may be correct, though where some language teachers are concerned it may be because they're lousy teachers and don't themselves understand the grammar. And that would not be unknown. The problem is that grammar is unfortunately quite important. Without an understanding of it, you cannot correctly construct sentences, which is really the whole point of speaking a language.
But let's say there is some value in this approach. Below, therefore, are 138 words/expressions. I will gladly offer them to you free of charge, though if you are truly impressed by your Spanish ability as a result, I might establish a PayPal account and you can transfer a tenner plus shipping costs and I'll send you a blank CD. So, here we go:
Some pronouns - yo, tú, él, ella, usted, nosotros, vosotros, ellos.
Some verbs - tener, hablar, poner, poder, estar, ser, decir, pedir, querer, seguir, hacer, ir, venir.
Some descriptive verbs - tener sed/hambre/frío/calor/razón, hace frío/calor/viento.
Some numbers - uno, dos, tres, diez, veinte, cien, ciento treinta y ocho, mil.
Some nouns - hombre, mujer, marido, abuelo, abuela, amigo, niño, hijo, comida, bebida, café, té, leche, cerveza, coche, jardín, playa, cara, cabeza, ojo, oreja, mano, cielo, lluvia, sol, casa, mesa, silla, salón, dormitorio, baño, cama, gato, perro, tiempo, hora, día, mañana, tarde, noche.
Some adjectives - pequeño, grande, mucho, poco, largo, corto, alto, ancho.
Some words of greeting and goodbye - hola, mucho gusto, encantado, cómo estás, qué tal, buenos días, buenas tardes, buenas noches, adiós, hasta luego.
Some prepositions - a, de, por, para, hasta, desde, con, sin, en, sobre.
Some common expressions - claro, perfecto, me gusta, digame, muchas gracias, lo siento.
Some adverbs - aún, entonces, también, tampoco, todavía, quizás, cuando, mismo (and mismo is one of the more versatile of Spanish words).
Some words of place - aquí, allí, ahí, frente, abajo, arriba, detrás.
Some question words - qué, quien, dónde, por qué, cómo.
Some negatives - no, nada, nadie, nunca, ningún.
Some conjunctions - porque, pero ... er, forget anymore, that's 138.
Right then, off you go, learn all that lot and then place them in meaningful sentences paying careful attention to verb conjugation, noun gender, adjectival endings, appropriate use of prepositions ...
Ultimately, the only way you learn is by speaking - and speaking a lot and by being corrected when you make mistakes. Especially those grammatical mistakes, because without the correct grammar and all the rest, you can never be said to be able to speak a language. But if you must, then go the 138 route and tell me if I'm wrong, so long as you do it in Spanish.
QUIZ
Today's title - when I saw her on Jools Holland's new year thing a few years back, it was - wow!
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
The site itself, and I'm damned if I'm mentioning it and giving it more publicity, was as you might expect. Great lists of testimonials of the I tried everything else and then found your course and now I speak the language so well I am the president of Spain variety. Again, I do exaggerate slightly. There was some mention of handing over folding notes through a credit-card transaction. 110 dollars I think it was. (Surely 138 would be more credible?) In return for this, you could download or get the CD or do whatever you are supposed to do with these things.
Now, I'm not saying that there may not be any merit in whatever system the site claims to promote. For all I know, you may indeed be fluent in a matter of weeks. But I do somewhat doubt it. One comes back to those 138 words. Apparently they're all you need to be conducting yourself in Spanish. No need for any boring old grammar. People do not learn languages through the grammar approach, it says. Language teachers don't like the grammar approach, it adds.
Up to a point, this may be correct, though where some language teachers are concerned it may be because they're lousy teachers and don't themselves understand the grammar. And that would not be unknown. The problem is that grammar is unfortunately quite important. Without an understanding of it, you cannot correctly construct sentences, which is really the whole point of speaking a language.
But let's say there is some value in this approach. Below, therefore, are 138 words/expressions. I will gladly offer them to you free of charge, though if you are truly impressed by your Spanish ability as a result, I might establish a PayPal account and you can transfer a tenner plus shipping costs and I'll send you a blank CD. So, here we go:
Some pronouns - yo, tú, él, ella, usted, nosotros, vosotros, ellos.
Some verbs - tener, hablar, poner, poder, estar, ser, decir, pedir, querer, seguir, hacer, ir, venir.
Some descriptive verbs - tener sed/hambre/frío/calor/razón, hace frío/calor/viento.
Some numbers - uno, dos, tres, diez, veinte, cien, ciento treinta y ocho, mil.
Some nouns - hombre, mujer, marido, abuelo, abuela, amigo, niño, hijo, comida, bebida, café, té, leche, cerveza, coche, jardín, playa, cara, cabeza, ojo, oreja, mano, cielo, lluvia, sol, casa, mesa, silla, salón, dormitorio, baño, cama, gato, perro, tiempo, hora, día, mañana, tarde, noche.
Some adjectives - pequeño, grande, mucho, poco, largo, corto, alto, ancho.
Some words of greeting and goodbye - hola, mucho gusto, encantado, cómo estás, qué tal, buenos días, buenas tardes, buenas noches, adiós, hasta luego.
Some prepositions - a, de, por, para, hasta, desde, con, sin, en, sobre.
Some common expressions - claro, perfecto, me gusta, digame, muchas gracias, lo siento.
Some adverbs - aún, entonces, también, tampoco, todavía, quizás, cuando, mismo (and mismo is one of the more versatile of Spanish words).
Some words of place - aquí, allí, ahí, frente, abajo, arriba, detrás.
Some question words - qué, quien, dónde, por qué, cómo.
Some negatives - no, nada, nadie, nunca, ningún.
Some conjunctions - porque, pero ... er, forget anymore, that's 138.
Right then, off you go, learn all that lot and then place them in meaningful sentences paying careful attention to verb conjugation, noun gender, adjectival endings, appropriate use of prepositions ...
Ultimately, the only way you learn is by speaking - and speaking a lot and by being corrected when you make mistakes. Especially those grammatical mistakes, because without the correct grammar and all the rest, you can never be said to be able to speak a language. But if you must, then go the 138 route and tell me if I'm wrong, so long as you do it in Spanish.
QUIZ
Today's title - when I saw her on Jools Holland's new year thing a few years back, it was - wow!
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
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