The Forgetfulness Of Clubs' Finances

Clubs are suddenly very much in fashion - news fashion, that is. The police and the tax agency have made them so. One of them is Amnesia, the Ibiza club that regularly features among awards for the best club in the world and which has been with us since the start of the 1970s. Amnesia, more than any other club, gave Ibiza its club reputation. It now looks as if it might acquire a different reputation.

Over recent days, the club and other property belonging to its owner, Martin Ferrer, have been raided by the Guardia Civil. The operation was ordered through a combination of an investigating judge in Ibiza, the tax agency and the Guardia Civil's central operations unit. The judge has since issued an order to "block" a total of sixteen properties belonging to Ferrer, meaning that they cannot be sold or their assets transferred. The scope of the operation is such that it involves property as far away as Leon on the mainland, where Ferrer has a house in Crémenes and various others.

The raid on Amnesia, which was over two days, extended to the opening of bank safe deposits. At least two million euros have been found. Ferrer was arrested but has been released, much to the perplexity of the prosecution service which had called for his precautionary detention and that of others. Nevertheless, the Guardia's criminal police and the tax agency believe they have the documentation they need and so it will not be altered or somehow disappear. Tax fraud and money laundering are the main charges that prosecutors are levelling.

The nature of the operation is such that Guardia detectives were moved in from Mallorca. Virtually no officers in Ibiza have been involved. At the room they have occupied at the Ibiza headquarters, the first thing that was done was to change the lock. A preliminary estimation by the tax agency of the level of alleged fraud is nearly five million euros. This figure relates to only two years - 2012 and 2013 - and this particular investigation was sparked by an anonymous tip-off directed principally against the former chief financial officer of Amnesia and related companies, Josep Aymar, with Ferrer also implicated.

The case has been several months in the unfolding. The prosecution service, on receipt of a report from the tax agency, lodged it was the court back in October. There had been a period of investigation prior to this, with the anonymous information and the facts it offered having been scrutinised.

The operation against Amnesia is not an isolated one. In fact it falls under a massive nationwide action. Dubbed "Operation Chopin", a total of 87 clubs were raided across Spain when officers from the Guardia, the National Police and the Mossos in Catalonia moved in early on Saturday morning at times when the clubs were closing: in the case of Amnesia, it typically closes at 7am. Among these clubs were other well-known ones in Ibiza - Space and Privilege - as well as BCM in Magalluf. Chopin is thus a major operation against potential tax fraud that embraces much of the elite of Balearic and Spanish nightlife.

The scale is enormous, the coordination of the action impressive. There were four clubs in the Balearics that were raided, but elsewhere there were as many as twenty (in Valencia), sixteen in both Catalonia and Galicia and ten in Andalusia. Together these clubs represent some twenty per cent of the entire turnover of Spain's nightlife sector. But what actually is the turnover? That's something for investigators to identify. Approximately 75% of revenue is cash.

As to Ferrer, it is not the first time that he has been the focus of an investigation. There was one in 2011 related to VAT returns five years previously. His involvement with Aymar is said to have been financially disadvantageous to him in that there were poor investment decisions, such as the Amnesia Barcelona project. An allegation is that the debt and interest that needed to be paid for that resulted in the diversion of funds in order to service the repayments; this represented, therefore, a loss for the tax agency, which is a polite way of saying that a fraud was committed.

Where does this all lead to? It's impossible to say. This is an investigation into a sector in which cash dominates. Establishing alleged trails of money laundering therefore becomes central. Unravelling them will not happen overnight; say between 12 midnight and 7am, when a club would be open.

Carlos And The Torrent Of Abuse

My guess would be that few of you will have heard of the film character José Luis Torrente. He is an interesting character in that, other than being a policeman (I think he has moved on to being an ex-policeman), he is also a racist, a Francoist, a fascist, a sexist, a frequenter of prostitutes, a heavy drinker and, as if this wasn't bad enough, a fan of Atlético Madrid.

Torrente was/is a character dreamt up by Santiago Segura, an actor and film producer. In what has since become a series of four Torrente films, he first appeared in the 1998 "Torrente, el brazo tonto de la ley", which translates as "Torrente, the stupid arm of the law".

Segura's Torrente franchise has suddenly been propelled stage centre into a new Mallorcan political drama. Carlos and the Torrente of abuse. Well, Torrente (or torrent) of abuse is rather overstating things, but it sounds good as a title and it does allude to what the master of the foot firmly in it, tourism minister Carlos Delgado, has had to say about the Guardia Civil, and specifically about a report by the Guardia into matters at Radio Calvia when Carlos was mayor. This report forms the basis of a Guardia request to a judge to subpoena Delgado so that he has to make a declaration in respect of the awarding of contracts at the radio station. By implication, the Guardia believes he may have a case to answer.

What is now being referred to as the "caso Radio Calvia" first came to light in March when the Guardia raided Calvia town hall, which was pretty dramatic stuff in itself. The Guardia was acting on a complaint lodged against Delgado by the PSOE party in Calvia. This alleged irregularities in respect of the awarding of contracts, and PSOE said that there could be evidence of "bribery, embezzlement, abuse of public office and the peddling of influence". Also named in PSOE's complaint were the current mayor, Manuel Onieva, and the current and former managers of the station. It went on to suggest that irregularities related to a period from 2005 to 2011.

At the time of the raid, Delgado insisted that the contracts were in accordance with the law governing awards in the public sector. He accused PSOE of "malicious misrepresentation" but said that if he were to be indicted (i.e. subpoenaed), he would abide by the ethical code of the Partido Popular, meaning that he would place himself in the party's hands. It could choose to relieve him of his position as tourism minister or not.

In fact, if the judge does decide to indict him, the PP would face no alternative than to force him to resign. To do anything else would make a mockery of its ethical code. Its spokesperson, Nuria Riera, has said that Delgado has the party's full support, but whether he would still have it, were the judge to accede to the Guardia's petition, must be open to doubt.

Delgado doesn't believe that he will be indicted. And he said so at a press conference, which is where the reference to Torrente comes into the story. Among other things, Carlos reckoned that the Guardia's investigation was "typical of Torrente". In English, we would say that it was like something out of a Torrente movie. At the press conference, Delgado highlighted what he claimed were inconsistencies and contradictions in the Guardia investigation report (getting dates mixed up or wrong, for instance). This might not have been so bad, but it was the terms in which he dissed the report and so therefore the Guardia which has really produced the drama.

Just look back at Torrente's character and at the title of his first film. I rest my case, m´lud might be the words of a prosecutor defending the Guardia's honour. It must be remembered that in Spain there are certain institutions you do not go around disrespecting, and the Guardia is most definitely one of them. It is not above criticism, but disrespect is taken a dim view of, and the Guardia is not happy that its professionalism has been challenged in the way that it has been.

Delgado has had his moments of gaffe, none more so than the photo of him with the deer's testicles on his head. It didn't exactly do him any favours, but that was more a case of him being opened up to potential ridicule rather than it having been a resignation matter. Now, however, and regardless of whether he is indicted or isn't, he may find it hard not to resign. If he had stuck to the inconsistencies line and that alone and left it to the judge to decide if there are indeed inconsistencies in the investigation report, then calls for him to go would not necessarily be being made pre-emptively. But he didn't. And worse still, he has picked an institution of which it makes little sense to make an enemy.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

MALLORCA TODAY - Sea rescue of 79-year-old man in Can Picafort

A 79-year-old man who had fallen accidentally from a boat that had run aground in heavy waves by Son Bauló in Can Picafort on Thursday was rescued and saved from almost certain death by the efforts of two Guardia Civil officers.

See more: Diario de Mallorca

MALLORCA TODAY - More on the butane scam arrests

The Guardia Civil has today released further information regarding its investigation into fraudulent butane-gas inspections that have been perpetrated across the island. Eleven people have been arrested, with 50,000 euros said to have been defrauded, and the company under investigation has been named as Tiansol System S.L. The company was apparently formed in September last year. This may suggest that it, or those involved with it, was potentially a new player on the butane-scam scene, and that other organisations who carry out this scam are still knocking around. While the Guardia's intervention is to be applauded, it may be that wariness still needs to be applied in case other similar, fraudulent businesses are operating.

MALLORCA TODAY - Guardia action against butane scam

The Guardia Civil has launched an operation investigating suspected fraud committed by a Palma company that sends inspectors to check gas installations and which can result in exorbitant charges. This practice of inspection, by companies which claim to be undertaking necessary checks when they are not and which will have personnel without necessary qualifications, has long been a matter of concern, owing to the number of people who have been duped.

Mind Your Language: Catalan and the Guardia

A Moroccan interpreter, Saïda Saddouki, has been found guilty of defaming a Guardia Civil officer and been fined a total of 1500 euros. The Saddouki case is the first of two to go to court in Mallorca, along with one in Gerona on the mainland earlier this year, which all have as their theme the speaking of Catalan to Guardia officers.

In August 2007 Saïda Saddouki went to the Guardia's command headquarters in Palma in order to translate from Arabic. She spoke to a captain in Catalan. At a later press conference, she alleged that the captain racially abused her by referring to her as "una mora catalanista" (literally a Catalan dark-skinned woman). The court found in favour of the captain who denied that he had said what Saddouki had alleged.

The case has become something of a cause célèbre, thanks in no small part to the role of the Obra Cultural Balear, an organisation which this year celebrates its fiftieth anniversary as one that promotes Catalan in the Balearics. The OCB was with Saddouki at that press conference. Since the court's decision it has said that it believes her account of what happened and not the captain's. It has also referred to discrimination in matters of language, has brought the Saddouki case to the attention of Amnesty International and has called for international observers and journalists to attend a future court case.

In March this year a woman called Àngels Monera was fined 180 euros for showing a lack of respect to Guardia officers at Gerona airport. Her version of events was that officers, to whom she did speak in Catalan, showed "contempt" for the language, and detained her long enough for her to miss her flight. She then made complaints to the media and ultimately found herself in court as a defendant. The Guardia version was that she had spoken aggressively and had called them "Francoists". The officers insisted that they had asked her to speak Castilian not because they sought to "impose" a language but because they didn't understand Catalan.

The future court case to which the OCB has invited observers from the European Union, and which has also been raised with the European Parliament, concerns one Iván Cortés. On 7 August last year Cortés was allegedly given a beating by Guardia officers who had asked him to produce his papers at Palma airport security and to whom he spoke in Catalan. He was allowed to make his flight - to London - where a doctor seemingly confirmed his injuries. The OCB took up his case and publicised it widely in the media. The court case is the trial of one of those officers.

What are we to make of these cases? Setting aside the rights or wrongs of what has happened or may have happened, they point to one thing - a ratcheting up of the whole Catalan issue. Appealing to Amnesty International and international observers and media takes it to a new level, and one that, on the face of it, seems somewhat extreme.

By doing so, the OCB, which had its own brush with the Guardia when a leading member was detained during the "Acampallengua" (language camp) in Sa Pobla last year, is further politicising an already political issue and also elevating it, via Amnesty, into the realms of human rights abuse.

The Spanish constitution recognises, through the exercise of human rights, the cultures, traditions and languages of all the peoples of Spain. Yet there is a dichotomy in that the defenders of the state, in the form of the Guardia, are officially only Castilian speaking. It is a dichotomy that needs addressing. Whether witting or unwitting, the Guardia should not be pushed into being a defender of language as well; it's not their job. But as things stand, the Guardia, placed in an invidious position, are an institutional target for those with a Catalanist agenda. Which is not to say that they can't potentially be brought to book, as will happen with the Cortés case.

The Saddouki case would probably be quickly forgotten about were it not for the Cortés trial. It is the alleged violence, together with the Catalan connection, that will, in all likelihood, make it more of a cause célèbre than Saddouki. And it probably will attract international attention. Moreover, it is likely to ask some awkward questions, ones that go to the heart of the constitution and of institutions.

For many of you, the Catalan issue might seem pretty arcane, but the depth of feeling that surrounds it is of great significance and is one that colours much of the local political discourse, as shown with the debate over language in education. Yes it's political, but then it's been a political issue for centuries, and an incident at Palma airport is about to make it more so.


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.

Captain, I Said What

Let's say you are Welsh. At Cardiff airport two policemen come up to you and ask you, in English, to produce your papers. You comply with the demand, but reply in Welsh. One of the policemen insists that you speak English. You do so, but the policeman then says that you must speak in a clearer fashion, to which you ask what he said. The police then, behind closed doors, attack you, hitting you on the head, in the mouth and the stomach and then charge you.

This, in essence, but substituting Catalan for Welsh and Castilian for English, is what is alleged to have happened to one Iván Cortés at Palma airport on 7 August. The police were Guardia Civil officers. The case has been taken up by the Obra Cultural Balear (OCB), an organisation that defends and promotes the use of Catalan. It has obtained a meeting with the director general of the island's Guardia to ask that "aggression" towards Catalan speakers ceases, the Cortés incident being the springboard for this request.

Cortés was allowed to make his journey, to London as it happens, where he was seen by a doctor whose report would appear to confirm injuries. The OCB adds that security cameras at Palma airport could also confirm what is alleged to have taken place.

This incident first came to light at the start of this month. A report in "The Diario" (3 September) listed what I have above. It also carried a photo from a press conference of Cortés, together with Tomeu Martí, the co-ordinator for the OCB. Cortés would probably be in his twenties. He has long dark hair and a beard with a longish, thin goatie. He has a dark complexion, suggesting mixed race or possibly one particular race.

Accusations against police happen everywhere, not always with justification. One has to bear in mind that the incident took place a few days after the Palmanova bombing. The police would have been on high alert, though one thing one can probably say is that Cortés does not look like how one might expect an ETA terrorist to appear. A question might be, however, why the officers demanded to see his papers in the first place. They are within their rights to do so, but the question might still be raised.

Guardia officers speak Castilian. Only Castilian. It is not the first time that one has heard of an incident, assuming the Cortés one to be accurate, in which there has been something of an issue with someone speaking Catalan. Guardia officers speak Castilian because it is the language of the state. And the Guardia is very closely associated with the state, the Spanish state. It is a defender of the state. Whether that means that it should be a defender of one language is another matter. In Mallorca, Catalan and Castilian enjoy joint official status.

One does not of course have the other side of the story. Nevertheless, an alleged attack on a defenceless man, whose only apparent "crime" was to speak Catalan and to seek clarification of what was being asked of him, is deserving of investigation, especially as it involves the schism of language and regionalism. There is, though, more to all this. Go back a bit. That other name. Tomeu Martí. Remember him? Probably not. Remember the "Acampallengua", the pro-Catalan gathering in Sa Pobla in late May? Remember that a senior figure in the OCB was arrested for "disobedience" by the Guardia? That was Martí. He was recently fined for refusing a request to show his papers, the cause of his arrest. Why he was asked to do so, I am unsure. But asked he was.

The OCB is not a party, but it has links to the political establishment locally. You may recall that back in December there was the campaign to speak Catalan over a coffee in the local bar. The OCB was behind that. It followed hard on the heels of the campaign to promote wider use of Catalan in bars and restaurants, one funded at a not insignificant cost by the Council of Mallorca. Both campaigns were innocent enough, but the "Acampallengua" did have an undercurrent of youth radicalisation, and then there was the demonstration in Palma during the summer in favour of Catalan (and indeed another in support of Castilian).

The Cortés case cannot be seen just as an isolated incident of possible police aggression. It has to be seen in a wider political and social context. At a press conference held two days ago to announce that request for a meeting with the Guardia, a representative of the republican left in the Balearics shared the platform with Martí, and a link was made to the fact that José Bono, president of the national congress of deputies, had been prohibited from speaking Catalan in the congress. Moreover, Martí has accused the Balearics delegate to the central government, Ramón Socias, of a failure to respond to "acts of discrimination against Catalan".

If it hasn't already been, the Guardia risks being dragged into some murky political waters, some, given its past reputation, it would do well to avoid. As a defender of the state, the whole state, it should not become the clarion call for political opportunism and polarisation in Mallorca, which this has the danger of becoming, and with the forces of the law set against elements of the political establishment, themselves supported by elements of a spot of "agitprop".


* To see the original "Diario" article and photo, go here: http://www.diariodemallorca.es/mallorca/2009/09/03/joven-afirma-agentes-guardia-civil-le-agredieron-hablar-catalan/499821.html

QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Talk Talk, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3V6CdsAMGYk. Today's title - to explain: captain is a rank in the Guardia; the rest follows. Who?

(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)

Suspicious Minds

Right, let's get back to something resembling normality - after a fashion. Or maybe not. The tension post-Palmanova was reflected on Saturday by the closure of roads around the Lago Menor in Puerto Alcúdia when a "suspicious package" was discovered. Nothing came of it of course. As ever after incidents anything looks like it might be packed with explosives. A problem is that there are any number of things that might qualify as suspicious - bags of rubbish discarded or all the stuff that just gets left out either for rubbish collection or for people to help themselves to. You could fill a house with what gets plonked on the street. Fridges, televisions, stereos, paintings, doors, drawers, entire patio suites of furniture (in need of restoration), old boilers in cardboard boxes. You name it, you can find it if you drive around long enough. And some of it could well fall into the "suspicious" category, especially suitcases. As for an old boiler, God knows what you could pack into that - a nuclear warhead probably. Reacting to a potentially suspicious bag or some such in the street does rather suggest too heightened a level of paranoia. If someone were of a mind to plant something, there are fairly obvious places to put them - like all the different rubbish containers.

And if not suspicious packages, then try the suspicious looking people. One review I read referred to someone that the reviewer thought he or she had seen on "Crimewatch". Let's face it, there are some on the loose who should be. Anyway, now we are being told that the ETA terrorists may have had contacts with radical, pro-Catalan youth groups on Mallorca. Indeed the police have in fact previously intercepted correspondence. There is no particular evidence that such a connection existed in respect of Palmanova, but it is one that naturally the police and Guardia are interested in examining, especially as they try to make sense of how a cell might have been able to exist on Mallorca for several weeks and to reconnoitre its targets. It might come as a surprise to learn that there are such groups. Mallorca is hardly a hotbed of revolutionary fervour, but there is a growing Catalan radicalisation. Any such association that may be proved would not help the cause of legitimate and honourable Catalan promotion.


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - The Eagles, "Hotel California", http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ea0CDieb4yM. Today's title - impersonator, anyone?

(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)

We Haven't Had That Spirit Here ...

"Plucky." "Dunkirk spirit." "Bastards."

There is nothing like a terrorist incident to excite the juices of tabloidism. Let us for Heaven's sake get Palmanova into proportion. Horrible it may have been, but it simply does not rank in the lists of the truly dreadful. Unusual it may have been for Mallorca, but it was an isolated incident directed at a symbol of the Spanish state.

There is seemingly also nothing like a terrorist incident to excite misinformation and wild rumour. The Chinese whispers have been shouted out. The bomb was at the airport. The airport is closed for days. There are terrorists everywhere, ready to set off further bombs. What if they are about to do something here (as in around Alcúdia)? All of it rubbish. The lockdown of Mallorca for a time and the ongoing police checks are all part of a well-rehearsed contingency plan in the event of an incident. There may have been a lack of vigilance in Palmanova, but there is no lack of foresight in dealing with a terrorist incident. That in itself speaks volumes. The bombing may not have been anticipated, but it was not unexpected. Mallorca may have been spared the terrorist excesses of the peninsula, but it is still Spain; Palma was once widely thought to have been a target for Al-Qaeda, even for Saddam Hussein, which just goes to show the sort of exaggerated garbage that gets trotted out but also the fact that Mallorca has not been excluded in the past from possible attack.

The tabloid reporting has been to an extent sensationalist and out of proportion, but locally it is understandable. Nevertheless, it was "The Sun" what did it with the use of "plucky". I honestly didn't believe that the paper did actually use the adjective. I had assumed it was a parody. But no. "Plucky British holidaymakers" were defying the terrorists, blah, blah. These plucky tourists were determined to still be heading for the beaches or the bars, and the Spanish press reported that things in Palmanova were all pretty much normal, yet "The Bulletin" showed a "desolated" beach, suggesting that everyone was staying away, a report that ran counter to others. Who do you believe? 'Twas ever thus with the press.

Those plucky Brits referred to having lived with the IRA. It's a tired comparison and justification, but there is some sense to it. And you can chuck in post-9/11 as well. Quite why British tourists should feel the need to cancel holidays or to try and get on the first flight out is unfathomable. Palmanova is, I suppose, a shock for those in Mallorca who have not known terrorism at relative first-hand, such as those of us who have lived in London for example. It is why, I guess, the hyperbole works overtime. Paradise lost. Paradise shattered. All that. Perhaps Palmanova has, though, made people realise that there is such a thing as reality, one that many seem to have forgotten existed or one that they were unaware existed at all. But one keeps coming back to what actually happened. It may sound callous, heartless or as though I am wilfully seeking to understate the significance of the attack, but in the terrorist scheme of things only the location is particularly surprising, the actual attack is not. ETA have made a habit of targetting the Guardia, which is not to suggest that the dead officers should have expected to have been blown up, but there should have been an awareness that a Palmanova could happen. Mallorca had seemed immune because of terrorist logistics, but the fact that there is now talk of there being or having been (for some weeks) an ETA cell on the island and of a safe house does again bring into question the role of intelligence.

Contrary to an impression that has been conveyed, there are not people wandering around weeping, being solemn or in a state of shock. People are talking, of course they are, but often talking in order to tell others to give it all a rest and to stop making more of the incident than it merits. There is also a fair degree of annoyance with the press, not least "The Bulletin" and its ludicrous appeal for a "Dunkirk spirit". One does actually despair of some of the reaction. It needs to be measured, it needs perspective. It does not need emotional language that serves only to ratchet up feelings and to heighten fears unnecessarily.

Shit happens, even in so-called paradise. They probably called Bali a paradise, and Palmanova does not come anywhere close to that in terms of scale or horror. It can happen and does happen. Anywhere.


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - REM, "Losing My Religion", http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eB3VTX0pxoE. Today's title - where's this from?

(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)

Why Don't You Come To Your Senses?

Curses. I had already penned today's piece, anticipating an end, but no. No end. Whassup? Real Mallorca, friends. Yes, once again, with lack of feeling. Real bloody Mallorca and the so-called plumber. No, he didn't show up to hand over the moolah, and there was no surprise there, but he did send a fax to ask for yet another extension. The great Real Mallorca farce drags on, and on, and on ... Does anyone give a toss any longer? Did they ever? Doubtful. But the panto season has started early. Will he buy it? Oh no, he won't. Oh yes, he will (insert "Bulletin" editorial).

To cut to the chase. Paul Davidson, for the second time, has requested a prolongation of the whole debacle that has become the mooted takeover of Real Mallorca. There are some explanations for this: he still hasn't got the money; he still hasn't constituted the right corporate vehicle for effecting the purchase; he's having a laugh. I leave it to you decide. Personally, I can't see how it can be the third of these, though there are plenty who might believe so - fans, the current owners, various journos, lawyers etc. No, it probably is still his intention to buy this stupid club. God knows why, but that's another issue.

The thing is, though, that if he does finally part with the money, the whole process, the whole pantomime, has seriously undermined him in the eyes of the people who matter, e.g. the fans and a highly sceptical Spanish media. Forget the Bulletin, it's the locals that need charming not a few nutty expats who turn up to watch an average team, and for reasons best known to them. Whatever goodwill may have been extended to him is fast evaporating, if it hasn't already. And many will doubt that, if the sale does go through, there will be loads of readies available for the team's development. If it's so problematic to buy the club, what does this say for the future?

The real sadness of all this is that Vicente Grande is likely to go along with it, albeit that he wants a deposit as a declaration of some sort of goodwill. Of course he does. No one else is willing to hand over close on 40 million euros for a club that doesn't even own its own ground. Grande's desperate - desperado - and one suspects that the other party knows this.

I am, to be honest, hacked off with the whole thing, mainly because I had crafted a hugely intelligent piece for today that I can now not use. And I had been next door to sample some glasses of vino tinto before I saw the news. I shouldn't write when under the influence, but I've got a blog to do, so that's why I'm hacked off. But why don't I include a bit from what I would have written? It refers to a commentator in "The Diario" who says, about the whole fiasco "that he can be included among the other journalists, 'administrators, jurists, lawyers, bankers and creditors' who have been made to look foolish".

The end.


Anyway, Plan B, folks. Don't for one moment think that a mere hiccup in the complex and absurd world of Real Mallorca can deter me from some other story of massive import. First rule of editorial. Always have another story up your sleeve or sitting on your desktop. So here goes ...

Remember that film with Steve McQueen. "Bullitt." The one with the car chase through the streets of San Francisco. Well, they tried a re-enactment - of sorts - through the streets of Alcúdia the other day and also along the motorways of Mallorca. To be honest, it shouldn't be much of a story, but given that locally "dog bites man" passes for headlines, it is. So, the story is that some lunatic Colombian hammered along the motorway from Palma and then around Alcúdia in a Volvo at some 200 kilometres an hour, whilst a couple of boys from the Guardia in a 4x4 were in hot pursuit. And hot it was, because there has been many a column inch devoted to the state that the Guardia's engine was getting into. Which does rather beg a question, but let's not go into that. But the nutter in the Volvo finally made his way up to La Victoria before hurtling off the mountainside in what turned out to be a vain attempt at suicide. He was detained for psychiatric reports, whilst the Guardia fellows were being heralded as "heroes". For what? Presumably because they were in charge of an overheating Nissan X-Trail. 200 kilometres an hour. Have they never driven on a German autobahn?

Mind you, hurtling around the streets of Alcúdia would have been some sport to watch. I have searched youtube, but am unable to find any blurry mobile footage of the chase. Shame. It would have all been worthwhile.

Normal service will, may, resume tomorrow.


QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Cream, "Sunshine Of Your Love" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FI8SUc2SV4k). Today's title - the title's in the article.

Oh, and here's the car chase from "Bullitt" - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GMc2RdFuOxI

(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)