The Ensaimada Is Turning Japanese

When Starbucks started selling what it called the "Mallorcan Sweet Bread" in its US coffee houses in 2010, there was an outcry among ensaimada traditionalists. The bun was coiled in the wrong direction. It should be clockwise. Starbucks had turned the clock back.

If only the ensaimada could also turn the clock back. Symbolic it is for Mallorcan gastronomy, albeit in a pork lard style that runs counter to generally accepted principles of the Mediterranean diet, but its recent history has not been a notable one. Economic crisis, inevitably, took its toll, but just as serious has been the loss of production of ingredients on the island which threaten its PGI (protected geographical identification) status, while there has also been a loss of sales to tourists, the result of all-inclusives, airline reluctance to allow the boxed ensaimada on board and cruise ship prohibition of food stuffs being taken onto ships. The traditional ensaimada has, therefore, been in decline for several years. There are now only twenty producers left; there had once been six times this number.

These problems have led to the dissolution of the regulatory council for ensaimada PGI and to the island's Association of Bakers and Confectioners assuming responsibility. This council didn't ask for much, but when it went in search of some official support, as it did in 2010, it was knocked back. Its president asked the government's director-general for agriculture for the grand sum of 18,000 euros to cover costs pertaining to the laying-off of two staff. This was apparently agreed to, but the promise was not met.

So, in addition to all its other troubles, the ensaimada was being treated with a degree of official indifference, and this despite the fact that it is of course revered as part of a Mallorcan gastronomy which supposedly offers an alternative tourist product.

Against this background, the ensaimada has, however, been emerging elsewhere. It isn't the Mallorcan ensaimada, but it is essentially the same, even if its coil is backwards. But might this be of benefit to the Mallorcan producers? Starbucks, when it launched its pastry, did explain on its website that the sweet bread was "called ensaimada in Spanish" (and the word is the same in Spanish, albeit that it doesn't have the umlaut over the "i" that the Catalan word has). The fact that Starbucks was describing it as "Mallorcan" might have been thought to be advantageous, but it would be stretching the imagination to believe that a direct benefit might accrue.

Now, the ensaimada is heading to Japan, but this journey has nothing to do with Mallorcan producers. A bakery concern in Madrid, which has traded as Pastelerias Mallorca since 1931 and which has fifteen outlets in the capital, is moving into the Japanese market and taking its version of the ensaimada with it, and it is perfectly entitled to do so as long as it doesn't call it Mallorcan (which would be a breach of the PGI rules). The Japanese, say the company, are big on artisan-style food products and their traditions as well as pastries, so the ensaimada fits the bill, even if it isn't the real thing.

Reaction to this in Mallorca has been to suggest that this will create confusion, but if the Japanese are unaware of the origins of the ensaimada, it is hard to see how they will be confused. There is also a recognition that it is a pity that no Mallorcan business has had the foresight to have done something similar. But without assistance for the ensaimada, it would be impossible. Or so it is said.

While the Japanese connection may not bring about any benefit for the Mallorcan ensaimada, it could, if someone took the initiative, have a benefit for Mallorca as a whole. If the pastry were to become popular, then it could act as a stimulus for Japanese tourism, of which there is very little at present. With this in mind, the PGI, it might be said, acts in a negative fashion. If Pastelerias Mallorca could actually brand it with the Mallorcan title, then who knows, maybe loads of Japanese, their curiosity piqued, would suddenly want to come to the island of the pastry's origin.

But it would be unlikely that this would happen, even though the PGI is in any event threatened because of access to locally produced ingredients. The "Mallorca" tag is jealously guarded as there are other ensaimadas across the globe, not least in the town of San Pedro in Argentina where an historical link with Mallorca and the ensaimada goes back to the nineteenth century. So strong is this link that the ensaimada is the town's symbol, and the town organises the annual national day of the Argentinian ensaimada, an occasion replete with ball de bot folk dance and other Mallorcan food. How very odd that no one has thought to do the same here.

Don't Fry For Me, Argentina

You wouldn't want to be an Argentinian at the moment, unless you were in Argentina. When I asked a good Argentinian, restaurant-owning friend of mine what he thought of the señora del hierro in Buenos Aires, his response was to the point - "puta". The hierro lady is a tramp. She's going to make life difficult for Argentinians in Mallorca and in Spain.

There is a not unnatural smugness among the Brits in indulging in a touch of schadenfreude. All those Mallorcans and Spaniards going around proclaiming the rights of the Malvinas and condemning the imperialism of a former iron lady now find, as an Argentinian boot is placed firmly up the jacksy of Spanish interests, that the British may have had a point.

But with any conflict, and even when there isn't a conflict, come the xenophobia and the irrational. During the Falklands crisis, I was in Amsterdam. There were demonstrations against the British. What had the Falklands to do with the normally sensible Dutch? Nothing, but irrationality can consume even the most level-headed of people. Britain, nasty imperial power; Argentina, poor underdog being doormatted under the weight of handbag tonnage. Or something like this.

So it is, or is likely to be, that the Mallorcan Argentinians, of whom there are many, will find themselves copping for some xenophobia over and above that which they normally cop. Mallorcans, Spaniards don't all much care for the Argentinians. Indeed, they don't much care for most South Americans; they're idle and loud. Pot, kettle, black.

President Fernández, President Kirchner (whichever you prefer) has of course learnt the lessons of history, and learnt them well from the iron handbagger. Bit of local, domestic difficulty - and she has it in the form of austerity, among other things - and some sabre-rattling can work wonders in the opinion polls. Some Falklandising has been followed up by the nationalisation of Repsol's stake in YPF.

Talk about kicking a country when it's down. Fernández de Kirchner would doubtless have been taking a keen interest in Spain's implosion. The time to strike was right. All publicity might be considered good publicity, but at present Spain is in desperate need of a Max Clifford of international relations. With quite staggeringly poor timing, the royals have become the elephant in the room where a hunt in Botswana was concerned (for which the King is now apologising) and literally have managed to shoot themselves in the foot, thanks to the boy Felipe and the gun he shouldn't have been handling.

Spain's foreign minister has taken a metaphorical leaf out of the royal literal book and suggested that it is in fact Argentina that has shot itself in the foot. All these feet being shot and no one's going to have a leg to stand on, which includes he who grows greyer by the day, Mr. Grey, Prime Minister Rajoy, who is actually proving to be as useless as it was suspected he would be (apart from all those in his party who hadn't purged him years ago). Faced with the YPF nationalisation, what will Rajoy do? Arrange for the armada to gather in Cadiz? If so, best he leaves it until after the 29th of April, the date on which Drake sank the armada in 1587. Given the way things are going, though, a Spanish fleet heading off across the Atlantic would probably manage to capsize off the Canaries.

Frantic efforts to bail out the naval rowing-boat are matched only by the frantic efforts to find a way of preventing a need for Europe to come with a large wedge of financial bail out. It's as well that Europe is around when you most need a friend. It's coming to Rajoy's aid and telling the Argentinian president to stop behaving like an Argentinian.

Still, with all Spanish pride sinking faster than its armada might, there is always football to keep the spirits up, though quite what Lionel Messi makes of his president, who knows. Presumably, he won't, on scoring a goal, be lifting his shirt to reveal a t-shirt with "Repsol out" scrawled on it. He probably thinks much the same as my restaurant-owning friend, if he thinks at all, that is.

And back at the local Argentinian restaurants, they'll be hurriedly pulling down the Argentinian grill signs and hastily erecting ones saying typical Mallorcan cuisine, while insisting that workers boycott the nearest Repsol petrol station. When the steak gets near the plancha, they'll be denying everything by singing "don't fry for me, Argentina". Do you suppose Madonna's being lined up to play Kirchner?


Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.