Which public sector tourism promotion agencies do you suppose featured in the top thirty spenders on advertising in Spain in 2014? Do you think the Balearics Tourism Agency might be one of them? Palma 365 perhaps? Or maybe even one of the island councils or town halls. The answer is of course that none of them feature. There is not one single public body in Mallorca or the Balearics which makes this top thirty, defined as having spent 500,000 euros or more on television, radio, press, internet, direct mail and mobile advertising.
This list is headed, by some considerable distance, by Viajes El Corte Inglés (32.4 million euros). Other travel agencies and tour operators get a look in, but of the public sector agencies, the highest ranking was Andalusia's (eighth with a spend of 2.2 million euros). Behind it came Mexico (tenth), New York (twelfth), Andorra (thirteenth), Galicia (fifteenth) with the Canaries, Castile-La Mancha, Malta, Madrid, Extremadura, Valencia and Portugal all listed.
It is no surprise that the Balearics tourism ministry's agency doesn't appear on the list as it doesn't spend anything on advertising; its promotional spend (such as it is) is dedicated almost exclusively to travel fairs. Yet somehow, even another low-spending regional agency, Valencia's, manages to part with half a million euros in seeking to attract national tourists.
But then, perhaps there is no need for such spend. With national tourists returning to Mallorca, thanks mainly to improved economic circumstances, then why bother? And this seems to be the prevailing attitude. Is it an appropriate attitude, or does Mallorca, conspicuous by its absence from advertising in established media, suffer in the long run? If it were conspicuous by its presence in less established media (social networks), then perhaps one might understand the attitude, but it doesn't engage in social media promotion either.
National demand in the first quarter was up by 10%, according to statistics, and these statistics, with which we are regularly bombarded, are to become the responsibility of the National Statistics Institute (INE). Currently, surveys of tourist spend and arrivals are actually the responsibility of Turespaña, the national tourism agency, and the intention to make this change was announced three years ago when the tourism secretary of state, Mallorca's Isabel Borrego, intimated that they might become more meaningful. The chances are that it will just mean that there are more of them.
Showing posts with label Advertising. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Advertising. Show all posts
Friday, April 17, 2015
Monday, May 26, 2014
Just A Game Of Futbol: McDonald's in Australia
The football World Cup is almost upon us. Advertising by official sponsors of the tournament has already arrived, and not everyone is happy with it. McDonald's, presumably in the absence of any Brazilian restaurants, is the official restaurant of the tournament. To mark this involvement, the burger giant is taking the radical step of temporarily dispensing with its usual french-fries dispenser. New designs will take the place of the traditional box and will come with a mobile app game, to boot.
This dramatic departure from tradition is all about communicating with Millennials, says McDonald's senior director of global marketing. This is a generation which loves art, unique customisation and McDonald's french fries. Does it really. The senior executive vice-president global chief brand officer of McDonald's (which is a hell of a long job title) says that it's all about "bringing fun, innovative programming to our customers and celebrating our shared love of futbol".
Whatever you say, Misters senior director of global marketing and senior executive vice-president global chief brand officer, but wait one moment. What is it that we all have a shared love of? Football? No, futbol. That's what it says in the quote I have lifted from adage.com. Spain has come to dominate world football, and it would now appear that the Spanish language has taken over and turned football into futbol. Or maybe it only has done in McDonald's-land. (There should, some of you might appreciate, be an accent over the u, but let's not get too pedantic.)
But hang on another moment, does the non-appearance of the accent, if only in the adage.com article, imply something more political? The word is identical in Catalan except for one important difference. There is no accent. Well, well. Its absence almost certainly doesn't imply anything political, but in these linguistically-fraught and correct times, one can't be too careful. Just as one can't be too careful about the type of image one wishes to portray in an advert. Which brings me to the spot of unhappiness.
Down under in Australia, McDonald's, in good Aussie tradition of giving any name some matey version, is known as Macca, which is not to confuse it with a one-time bass player from Liverpool who, in the dim distant past, was once any good. And Macca, as it states on its Aussie website, is "kicking off with an exciting line-up that'll be sure to score goals with your tastebuds". Kicking off the World Cup, that is, with a quite lamentable string of football clichés. Sorry, futbol clichés.
Macca has a series of TV ads. They are to promote World Cup specials for different countries. There are only a few countries for which there is a Macca special - Bosnia-Herzegovina, for example, doesn't appear to merit one - but of the few countries, the Spanish entry has caused a bit of a fuss. It's that cliché thing again, this time as in clichéd national stereotyping.
The ad is for the Spain Brekkie Wrap, a delicious-looking item that features sausage, scrambled egg and ketchup. It is only fifteen seconds long, but the ad manages to pack in as many clichés as are possible in such a short period of time. In the ad there are two what one guesses are futbol commentators. Commentator one announces the delicious contents before breaking into "olé, olé, olé" and inspiring commentator two, till then sour-faced and bearing a striking resemblance to Saddam Hussein with a matador's hat on, to become animated, stick a rose in his mouth and mime the playing of a flamenco guitar.
While one might conclude that the ad's crime is in being rotten as opposed to being offensive, commentators who have posted on McDonald's España Facebook page are in no doubt that it is both rotten and offensive. "Is anyone going to do something about it? Can we sink any lower?" "Are you not ashamed? Spain, its culture, people and products deserve respect." "The advert is demeaning to Spanish and Hispanic culture. Then there's the sandwich. Two shitty sausages masquerading as chorizos with scrambled egg without seasoning. This is a Spanish sandwich?" "The advert is a disgrace. It ridicules us."
At least one poster points out that the ad is not intended for broadcast in Spain and so says that it is not offensive just ignorant. But his is the only comment with a moderate opinion among the others. The strength of these opinions, not that they are likely to have any impact, do serve to remind us all, including McDonald's, that we live in a joined-up world. What's good for Australia is not good for Spain, and moreover, the Spanish are going to find out and have done.
The World Cup, the global game, the global media of social networks. If only it were just a game of futbol.
Thursday, June 13, 2013
An Advertising Four-Letter Word
There was this thing in a paper about a tourist guide in Seville. The particular paper isn't important and nor is the tourist guide. What is, for my purposes, is what this paper said this guide offers - a guide to the "coolest" places to go.
Anyone who uses the word "cool" or its superlative should be made to sit inside an extremely hot sauna, the hottest that can be found, clad in thermals and a heavy overcoat. And if this purgatory of heat, as opposed to coolness, isn't sufficient to drive away the use of cool forever, then the cool miscreant should also be forced to write out one thousand times, "I will never again use a stupid, hackneyed and utterly meaningless word that is designed to somehow make me (or the thing I'm describing) appear to be hip (whatever this means), down with the kids or down with much older people than kids who appear to labour under a misapprehension that they are still kids".
I have a serious problem with a great deal of what passes for advertising-speak; a problem that confronts me during every waking moment in Mallorca. There really is some nonsense out there, and some of it is cool or coolest nonsense. But I am not about to pretend that I am holier than thou. Father, forgive me, for I have sinned and used or sanctioned some of this rubbish myself.
The local Mallorcan/Spanish restaurant insists on perpetrating a promotional crime that it is pretty much unique to it (oops, unique is a bad word and it can't be pretty much unique anyway), and this is the boast that it is a "specialist in meat". The only good thing to say about this is that it does at least achieve some hint of niching the product offer. I mean, you wouldn't say "specialist in food". Or maybe you would.
This idiosyncratic meat specialism isn't the only oddity of the "authentic" or "typical" Mallorcan restaurant (both of these words also being crimes of overuse against advertising humanity). There is the "artesana" typical authenticity which infiltrates advertising as well. The British, some of them, will be up to speed with the concept of artisan cooking, but local "cocina artesana" often ends up being translated in a more readily understood way, i.e. "handmade". I'm sorry, but unless the kitchens of Mallorca have been invaded by robots, is not all cooking handmade, as in the hands can come in quite useful for the making thereof? Alternatives to this artisan culinary craft are "rustic" and "cocina casera". Rustic? What the hell is rustic? I don't want to eat something that sounds as though it is some bits of old wood that have been marinaded in oxidised iron filings for several years. And as for "cocina casera" - home cooking, in other words - how many restaurants are actually homes? Not that many, I think you'll find.
While the local restaurant can fall prey to the typically authentic, artisanal, rustic, homemade, handmade, specialised-in-meat cliché, it can also, along with many other types of business, commit sins of meaninglessness, hyperbole and the just plain wrong. So, to avoid the fires of hell that should burn under anyone who has dared to use the c-word or the c-ist-word, here are the ten words (or phrase) that, under no circumstances, should you ever use, ever again anywhere near a piece of publicity.
Team, Service, Quality, Friendly, Finest, Caring, Catering to your needs, Value, Experience and of course Unique. There are others, but these are at the top of the list. And why? Well, with some of them, think for a moment. What are the opposites? Lack of service, lack of quality, unfriendly. They are attributes that are givens, or should be. But they are also tossed around with such predictability that they have come to mean precisely nothing.
Of these, the greatest sinner of all is "team". No, no, no. Except for the very rare examples of when a team might really be a team, there is no such thing. As with the garbage that is the "team-player" of recruitment ads (meaning what exactly?), a team can only be a team under very specific conditions. I shan't bore you with the explanation as to what these conditions are, but if team has been used just because it is thought to sound good, then the team almost certainly doesn't exist.
But if there are words that should not be used, there are a few which could be. And we all know what the most important one is, don't we? It isn't cool, that's for sure. Begins with "f", four letters.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Anyone who uses the word "cool" or its superlative should be made to sit inside an extremely hot sauna, the hottest that can be found, clad in thermals and a heavy overcoat. And if this purgatory of heat, as opposed to coolness, isn't sufficient to drive away the use of cool forever, then the cool miscreant should also be forced to write out one thousand times, "I will never again use a stupid, hackneyed and utterly meaningless word that is designed to somehow make me (or the thing I'm describing) appear to be hip (whatever this means), down with the kids or down with much older people than kids who appear to labour under a misapprehension that they are still kids".
I have a serious problem with a great deal of what passes for advertising-speak; a problem that confronts me during every waking moment in Mallorca. There really is some nonsense out there, and some of it is cool or coolest nonsense. But I am not about to pretend that I am holier than thou. Father, forgive me, for I have sinned and used or sanctioned some of this rubbish myself.
The local Mallorcan/Spanish restaurant insists on perpetrating a promotional crime that it is pretty much unique to it (oops, unique is a bad word and it can't be pretty much unique anyway), and this is the boast that it is a "specialist in meat". The only good thing to say about this is that it does at least achieve some hint of niching the product offer. I mean, you wouldn't say "specialist in food". Or maybe you would.
This idiosyncratic meat specialism isn't the only oddity of the "authentic" or "typical" Mallorcan restaurant (both of these words also being crimes of overuse against advertising humanity). There is the "artesana" typical authenticity which infiltrates advertising as well. The British, some of them, will be up to speed with the concept of artisan cooking, but local "cocina artesana" often ends up being translated in a more readily understood way, i.e. "handmade". I'm sorry, but unless the kitchens of Mallorca have been invaded by robots, is not all cooking handmade, as in the hands can come in quite useful for the making thereof? Alternatives to this artisan culinary craft are "rustic" and "cocina casera". Rustic? What the hell is rustic? I don't want to eat something that sounds as though it is some bits of old wood that have been marinaded in oxidised iron filings for several years. And as for "cocina casera" - home cooking, in other words - how many restaurants are actually homes? Not that many, I think you'll find.
While the local restaurant can fall prey to the typically authentic, artisanal, rustic, homemade, handmade, specialised-in-meat cliché, it can also, along with many other types of business, commit sins of meaninglessness, hyperbole and the just plain wrong. So, to avoid the fires of hell that should burn under anyone who has dared to use the c-word or the c-ist-word, here are the ten words (or phrase) that, under no circumstances, should you ever use, ever again anywhere near a piece of publicity.
Team, Service, Quality, Friendly, Finest, Caring, Catering to your needs, Value, Experience and of course Unique. There are others, but these are at the top of the list. And why? Well, with some of them, think for a moment. What are the opposites? Lack of service, lack of quality, unfriendly. They are attributes that are givens, or should be. But they are also tossed around with such predictability that they have come to mean precisely nothing.
Of these, the greatest sinner of all is "team". No, no, no. Except for the very rare examples of when a team might really be a team, there is no such thing. As with the garbage that is the "team-player" of recruitment ads (meaning what exactly?), a team can only be a team under very specific conditions. I shan't bore you with the explanation as to what these conditions are, but if team has been used just because it is thought to sound good, then the team almost certainly doesn't exist.
But if there are words that should not be used, there are a few which could be. And we all know what the most important one is, don't we? It isn't cool, that's for sure. Begins with "f", four letters.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Vorsprung Durch Slogans
"Vorsprung durch Technik" was one of the great advertising slogans. John Hegarty, now Sir John, was the person who discovered the slogan. He didn't make it up, as it was one that Audi had used some years before for German advertising but had dropped. Hegarty's agency, BBH, pitched for Audi's new campaign (in the early 1980s) and the slogan, despite resistance, was central to its successful pitch and subsequently successful series of adverts. It was brilliant because it was unexpected and went against the norm by being in a foreign language.
Hegarty explains all this in a video and points out that the ads also benefited from Geoffrey Palmer's gently mocking delivery, the addition of "as they say in Germany" and from the humour. The best of the ads was the one with the Schmitz, the Reinhards and the Müllers, driving to Spain on holiday, and with the punchline moral of the story: "if you want to get on the beach before the Germans, you'd better buy an Audi 100".
Humour sells and the humour of the Audi ads and slogan was one of ribbing the very country where the cars were manufactured. "Vorsprung durch Technik" would have been less effective had it not been for Palmer's dismissive tone. The slogan became memorable, despite being unintelligible to much of its intended audience, because it sounded funny and was made to sound funny.
All sorts of other things sell as well. Emotion for one. I don't know if Thomson's "Time For A Holiday" ad has been nominated for the Travel Marketing Awards in March next year but it should be. It was one that had a number of sub-slogans, such as "the most precious time of all". These awards, organised by the Chartered Institute of Marketing in the UK, cover a range of media and marketing disciplines, and in 2011 there was a special award for travel brand of the decade. It was Virgin Atlantic, winner again of the travel brand of the year award in 2012, partly thanks to its slogan "your airline's either got it or it hasn't" and to another example of resorting to the use of foreign language - "je ne sais quoi, defined".
A slogan is only as good as the advert or the rest of the marketing campaign but it is like the comedian's catchphrase; the marketing element that is instantly recognisable and is instantly associated with the product. Which brings us to some examples in Spanish and Mallorcan tourism.
A hotel chain in Mallorca insists that "you've got to live it". Really? Live what exactly? I'm not sure that I much care for being told what I have got to live. But assuming that I have lived it, am I going to remember the slogan? I doubt it. There is nothing definable about the slogan and nothing to associate it with the hotel. A slogan really needs to convey an attribute and this doesn't. Going back to Audi, though the slogan was German, its core attribute was clear in terms of engineering quality which was primarily what Audi was selling.
Turespaña have for some time been telling everyone that they "need Spain". The "I Need Spain" slogan is snappy enough and it is clear enough as to what it is referring, but, and rather like "you've got to live it", it begs being parodied by having words added. I need Spain like I need (add as applicable). There is also a hint of desperation. It is need rather than want. "I Want Spain". Not sure, but it might have been better.
Desperation was implied by an old series of promotion for alternative tourist activities dreamt up by the former Balearics tourism agency, Ibatur. Golf, meetings, good food, these were all appended to the curious slogan "Much more than ...". Hence, for example, "much more than golf". It didn't really make sense as the intention was to promote golf but it sounded as though you were supposed to forget about the golf and indulge in much more. Of what, I'm not sure. Meetings perhaps. But the use of "much" was the hint of desperation. "Mucho más." To say that it wasn't a very good slogan would be generous.
And then we have the recent contributor to marketing excellence, Palma's "passion for ..." slogan. One that can also have various things added, the tangible, such as gastronomy, or the intangible, like enjoying. It also isn't much good. It's passé, unimaginative and says nothing about Palma as such.
With all this in mind, there is scope to create slogans that are good, are meaningful (or meaningfully enigmatic, like Audi's) and are memorable. So, this is your challenge. I feel sure there is creativity in abundance out there. Send me your slogan suggestions for promoting Mallorca.
* The John Hegarty video: http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/video/2012/sep/18/vorsprung-durch-technik-video
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Hegarty explains all this in a video and points out that the ads also benefited from Geoffrey Palmer's gently mocking delivery, the addition of "as they say in Germany" and from the humour. The best of the ads was the one with the Schmitz, the Reinhards and the Müllers, driving to Spain on holiday, and with the punchline moral of the story: "if you want to get on the beach before the Germans, you'd better buy an Audi 100".
Humour sells and the humour of the Audi ads and slogan was one of ribbing the very country where the cars were manufactured. "Vorsprung durch Technik" would have been less effective had it not been for Palmer's dismissive tone. The slogan became memorable, despite being unintelligible to much of its intended audience, because it sounded funny and was made to sound funny.
All sorts of other things sell as well. Emotion for one. I don't know if Thomson's "Time For A Holiday" ad has been nominated for the Travel Marketing Awards in March next year but it should be. It was one that had a number of sub-slogans, such as "the most precious time of all". These awards, organised by the Chartered Institute of Marketing in the UK, cover a range of media and marketing disciplines, and in 2011 there was a special award for travel brand of the decade. It was Virgin Atlantic, winner again of the travel brand of the year award in 2012, partly thanks to its slogan "your airline's either got it or it hasn't" and to another example of resorting to the use of foreign language - "je ne sais quoi, defined".
A slogan is only as good as the advert or the rest of the marketing campaign but it is like the comedian's catchphrase; the marketing element that is instantly recognisable and is instantly associated with the product. Which brings us to some examples in Spanish and Mallorcan tourism.
A hotel chain in Mallorca insists that "you've got to live it". Really? Live what exactly? I'm not sure that I much care for being told what I have got to live. But assuming that I have lived it, am I going to remember the slogan? I doubt it. There is nothing definable about the slogan and nothing to associate it with the hotel. A slogan really needs to convey an attribute and this doesn't. Going back to Audi, though the slogan was German, its core attribute was clear in terms of engineering quality which was primarily what Audi was selling.
Turespaña have for some time been telling everyone that they "need Spain". The "I Need Spain" slogan is snappy enough and it is clear enough as to what it is referring, but, and rather like "you've got to live it", it begs being parodied by having words added. I need Spain like I need (add as applicable). There is also a hint of desperation. It is need rather than want. "I Want Spain". Not sure, but it might have been better.
Desperation was implied by an old series of promotion for alternative tourist activities dreamt up by the former Balearics tourism agency, Ibatur. Golf, meetings, good food, these were all appended to the curious slogan "Much more than ...". Hence, for example, "much more than golf". It didn't really make sense as the intention was to promote golf but it sounded as though you were supposed to forget about the golf and indulge in much more. Of what, I'm not sure. Meetings perhaps. But the use of "much" was the hint of desperation. "Mucho más." To say that it wasn't a very good slogan would be generous.
And then we have the recent contributor to marketing excellence, Palma's "passion for ..." slogan. One that can also have various things added, the tangible, such as gastronomy, or the intangible, like enjoying. It also isn't much good. It's passé, unimaginative and says nothing about Palma as such.
With all this in mind, there is scope to create slogans that are good, are meaningful (or meaningfully enigmatic, like Audi's) and are memorable. So, this is your challenge. I feel sure there is creativity in abundance out there. Send me your slogan suggestions for promoting Mallorca.
* The John Hegarty video: http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/video/2012/sep/18/vorsprung-durch-technik-video
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
MALLORCA TODAY - Nadal and Ronaldo film in Santa Ponsa
Rafael Nadal and Real Madrid footballer Cristiano Ronaldo were both at the country club in Santa Ponsa yesterday to take part in filming for a Nike advert amidst heavy security.
Friday, April 29, 2011
Keep It Simple: Design
"The Bulletin" has been re-designed. As part of a stable that boasts the Catalan daily "dBalears", which won an award for its makeover, the result of this re-design should be positive.
The "dBalears" revamp was contemporary in one very strong regard. Its look owed and owes much to internet presentation. It is perhaps an irony of digital competition that the print media should ape this competition, though it is not a surprise. Good layout on a screen demands clean lines and appearance; the same principle applies to whatever format.
There is, however, design and there is design. No, make that that there is design, design and design. Design that is simply no good, that which is good, and that which is good but completely misses the point.
I was in a bar the other day (the Jolly Roger). There was a poster on one of the wooden posts. I looked at it and I continued to look at it. I had to go back and look again. Finally, someone (Grizz) came in and without asking pointed at something on the poster and announced that a complaint should be made. There it was. What I had been unable to see. The date.
If you are going to have a poster for an event, in this case a horse spectacular in Alcúdia, one fairly basic requirement is that you clearly communicate when it's taking place. This poster does nothing of the sort. The reason for my being unable to locate the date was how it had been designed.
The problem with the design was that the date was not only to the left, it was also vertical. Its positioning and style broke two fundamental rules. One is that the eye tracks to the right, unless you're an Arabic reader and the eye goes the other way, in which case you will have just read "daer tsuj evah ...". While the main visual look of the poster, that of a horse, strangely enough, grabs the attention, it is the information that needs to be communicated which is as important, and being informed as to when the show is happening is far from unimportant.
Just as the eye tracks to the right and not to the left, so it also, or rather the brain, needs to adjust to a vertical visual and more specifically text that runs vertically. It's why I couldn't see it, even though it was literally staring me in the face.
There is nothing wrong with breaking rules, but design which may be good (and to be honest the overall poster design isn't that good) has to keep to the point. Which is to communicate.
In Mallorca, there are an awful lot of designers. It seems, at times, as though whole school years leave education armed with a design qualification. There are hordes of them, armed with Photoshop and Illustrator and with innovation firmly in mind. This has spawned some remarkably good graphic work. The standards of Mallorcan design are high, owing at least something to an artistic heritage on the island.
However, the craving for innovativeness can get in the way of the message. Similarly, a lack of appreciation as to audience can also obscure what it is that is meant to be conveyed. I'll give you an example.
A few years ago, the Pollensa autumn fair had a visual that was meant to be some sort of agricultural tool. You could have fooled me. It looked more like a sex aid. I was completely baffled by it. While it may have meant something to the local Mallorcan population, it meant nothing to anyone else. Too much promotional material suffers from a failure to communicate in different languages, but when the visual imagery misses the point of its audience, or potential audience, then any innovation becomes pointless.
Simple really is often the best. Take design for restaurant adverts. Tedious may be the almost default style of advert which shows a terrace or an interior, but it is actually important. It was a message that came over when someone was analysing different designs as a tourist. Those with shots of what the place looked like were more meaningful than something more arty that didn't. The message was very powerful, because the very audience the adverts were being intended for was being influenced by one of the most powerful things a restaurant has to sell - its look.
And look is everything. Adverts, brochures, newspapers. And simple is also very often everything.
N.B. The re-design of "The Bulletin" is from Saturday, 30 April. This article, forwarded as usual for reproduction in the paper, would appear to have been vetoed on the grounds that the design team responsible for the re-design might be a bit "touchy". Can anyone explain why? Given that this article had been knocked out earlier than would normally be the case, as with a now alternative, in order to help them out for their grand re-launch (at a time when I don't have a lot of spare time), I feel I have every right to be a tad pissed off. Perhaps sensibilities towards contributors and remuneration might be as strong as that afforded to a bunch of designers.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
The "dBalears" revamp was contemporary in one very strong regard. Its look owed and owes much to internet presentation. It is perhaps an irony of digital competition that the print media should ape this competition, though it is not a surprise. Good layout on a screen demands clean lines and appearance; the same principle applies to whatever format.
There is, however, design and there is design. No, make that that there is design, design and design. Design that is simply no good, that which is good, and that which is good but completely misses the point.
I was in a bar the other day (the Jolly Roger). There was a poster on one of the wooden posts. I looked at it and I continued to look at it. I had to go back and look again. Finally, someone (Grizz) came in and without asking pointed at something on the poster and announced that a complaint should be made. There it was. What I had been unable to see. The date.
If you are going to have a poster for an event, in this case a horse spectacular in Alcúdia, one fairly basic requirement is that you clearly communicate when it's taking place. This poster does nothing of the sort. The reason for my being unable to locate the date was how it had been designed.
The problem with the design was that the date was not only to the left, it was also vertical. Its positioning and style broke two fundamental rules. One is that the eye tracks to the right, unless you're an Arabic reader and the eye goes the other way, in which case you will have just read "daer tsuj evah ...". While the main visual look of the poster, that of a horse, strangely enough, grabs the attention, it is the information that needs to be communicated which is as important, and being informed as to when the show is happening is far from unimportant.
Just as the eye tracks to the right and not to the left, so it also, or rather the brain, needs to adjust to a vertical visual and more specifically text that runs vertically. It's why I couldn't see it, even though it was literally staring me in the face.
There is nothing wrong with breaking rules, but design which may be good (and to be honest the overall poster design isn't that good) has to keep to the point. Which is to communicate.
In Mallorca, there are an awful lot of designers. It seems, at times, as though whole school years leave education armed with a design qualification. There are hordes of them, armed with Photoshop and Illustrator and with innovation firmly in mind. This has spawned some remarkably good graphic work. The standards of Mallorcan design are high, owing at least something to an artistic heritage on the island.
However, the craving for innovativeness can get in the way of the message. Similarly, a lack of appreciation as to audience can also obscure what it is that is meant to be conveyed. I'll give you an example.
A few years ago, the Pollensa autumn fair had a visual that was meant to be some sort of agricultural tool. You could have fooled me. It looked more like a sex aid. I was completely baffled by it. While it may have meant something to the local Mallorcan population, it meant nothing to anyone else. Too much promotional material suffers from a failure to communicate in different languages, but when the visual imagery misses the point of its audience, or potential audience, then any innovation becomes pointless.
Simple really is often the best. Take design for restaurant adverts. Tedious may be the almost default style of advert which shows a terrace or an interior, but it is actually important. It was a message that came over when someone was analysing different designs as a tourist. Those with shots of what the place looked like were more meaningful than something more arty that didn't. The message was very powerful, because the very audience the adverts were being intended for was being influenced by one of the most powerful things a restaurant has to sell - its look.
And look is everything. Adverts, brochures, newspapers. And simple is also very often everything.
N.B. The re-design of "The Bulletin" is from Saturday, 30 April. This article, forwarded as usual for reproduction in the paper, would appear to have been vetoed on the grounds that the design team responsible for the re-design might be a bit "touchy". Can anyone explain why? Given that this article had been knocked out earlier than would normally be the case, as with a now alternative, in order to help them out for their grand re-launch (at a time when I don't have a lot of spare time), I feel I have every right to be a tad pissed off. Perhaps sensibilities towards contributors and remuneration might be as strong as that afforded to a bunch of designers.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Have I Got Videos For You
"This week's odd-one-out round. Paul and Jon, your four are Harold "Hype" Williams, some happy slappers from West Bromwich, the MKTGONLINEIB and the Iberostar Alcúdia Park hotel, Playa de Muro, Mallorca."
"Is it the? What did you call it? The Muckt-gon-lee-nee-aye-bee? Is it the only one who looks like a robot which looks like it could do with getting out more?"
"No, actually it's the Iberostar Alcúdia Park hotel, Playa de Muro, Mallorca. Shall I tell you why?"
"No thanks."
"Well, I'll tell you anyway. It's the only one that doesn't make videos, but has videos made of it. In fact, there is one about it that appears at the top of the list of other videos to watch on YouTube next to this edition of 'Have I Got News For You', assuming you are watching S40E01 extended parts one to three and probably also assuming that you are watching it in Playa de Muro."
"And why's that exactly? Just because you're watching this particular show and because you're in - where's that place called again?"
"Playa de Muro. It's in Mallorca."
"Is it really. But that doesn't answer my question."
"I'm not sure why."
"But you play Sherlock Holmes, you should know why."
"They didn't have YouTube in my, erm, in Holmes's day. I think it's to do with intelligently figuring out the location of the user or something like that."
"Intelligent!? But if you're in this place, whatever it's called ..."
"Playa de Muro. It means the beach of the wall."
"In the beach of the wall, why would you want to know about a tourist hotel? You're not going to stay in it, if you're already there."
"That's a very good question."
"Yea, I know. That's why I asked it."
"In fact, the video is in Spanish as well. And I don't think this show has many Spanish viewers."
"So it's not intelligent at all, then."
"No, I suppose it isn't."
"So, why did you say it was, then? And this MKTGONLINEIB, how do we know it's a robot?"
"We don't. In fact it's probably a person."
"A robot's a person!? What is this? The return of the Borgs or something?"
"It's the name that appears under the video. The poster I think you call it. Or him. Or her. Anyway, shall we move on?"
"Yes, let's."
The above is of course made up, but is intended to raise a question about promotional videos and the like that are placed on the internet. Why would you, if you were in Playa de Muro, as in I was when I was watching the "Have I Got News For You" video, or anywhere else for that matter, be interested in a tourist hotel that's just up the road? I assume the video was placed because location was detected. But what's the good of that?
And this, if you're interested, is the video in question. There is something alarming about it. Not only can it detect where you are, it can also feature you in the video. At 0:37, who the hell is that bloke sitting by the bar?
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
"Is it the? What did you call it? The Muckt-gon-lee-nee-aye-bee? Is it the only one who looks like a robot which looks like it could do with getting out more?"
"No, actually it's the Iberostar Alcúdia Park hotel, Playa de Muro, Mallorca. Shall I tell you why?"
"No thanks."
"Well, I'll tell you anyway. It's the only one that doesn't make videos, but has videos made of it. In fact, there is one about it that appears at the top of the list of other videos to watch on YouTube next to this edition of 'Have I Got News For You', assuming you are watching S40E01 extended parts one to three and probably also assuming that you are watching it in Playa de Muro."
"And why's that exactly? Just because you're watching this particular show and because you're in - where's that place called again?"
"Playa de Muro. It's in Mallorca."
"Is it really. But that doesn't answer my question."
"I'm not sure why."
"But you play Sherlock Holmes, you should know why."
"They didn't have YouTube in my, erm, in Holmes's day. I think it's to do with intelligently figuring out the location of the user or something like that."
"Intelligent!? But if you're in this place, whatever it's called ..."
"Playa de Muro. It means the beach of the wall."
"In the beach of the wall, why would you want to know about a tourist hotel? You're not going to stay in it, if you're already there."
"That's a very good question."
"Yea, I know. That's why I asked it."
"In fact, the video is in Spanish as well. And I don't think this show has many Spanish viewers."
"So it's not intelligent at all, then."
"No, I suppose it isn't."
"So, why did you say it was, then? And this MKTGONLINEIB, how do we know it's a robot?"
"We don't. In fact it's probably a person."
"A robot's a person!? What is this? The return of the Borgs or something?"
"It's the name that appears under the video. The poster I think you call it. Or him. Or her. Anyway, shall we move on?"
"Yes, let's."
The above is of course made up, but is intended to raise a question about promotional videos and the like that are placed on the internet. Why would you, if you were in Playa de Muro, as in I was when I was watching the "Have I Got News For You" video, or anywhere else for that matter, be interested in a tourist hotel that's just up the road? I assume the video was placed because location was detected. But what's the good of that?
And this, if you're interested, is the video in question. There is something alarming about it. Not only can it detect where you are, it can also feature you in the video. At 0:37, who the hell is that bloke sitting by the bar?
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
The Great Steak Wars: Really real in Playa de Muro
"Real steak." Not real as in a Spanish football club, but real as in "real" - genuine, authentic, English. When is real steak unreal, do you suppose? When it's not steak probably. The "real" moniker makes something of a change to those alternatives, especially authentic. Authentic (typical) Mallorcan cuisine, authentic Indian cuisine, authentic, authentic. I wish a restaurant would promote itself as being unauthentic. I might go then.
There is a real steak war emerging. A real steak war as in both the steak being real and there really being a steak war as opposed to a pretend one; well, sort of. The real steak war is also being fought out over real historical claims. Since 19--, apply your own numbers. The steak war is in Las Gaviotas, the area of Playa de Muro that no one really calls Las Gaviotas, if they happen to be a tourist, as equally no tourist really calls it Playa de Muro because they think, or are told, that it is Alcúdia, which it isn't.
The restaurant S'Albufera has a chalkboard sign outside, declaring the reality of its steak and the years of really having been a steak house. 30 years, it would seem. Why has the restaurant made this move? It is, it would appear, an escalation of the war against a newcomer to the steak battlefield. Where would we be without them? The Dakota restaurants.
Almost next door to S'Albufera and its thirty years of steaking claims is a new Dakota, but not only a tex-mex Dakota. This is a steak house Dakota. A large sign says so. Steak House in big letters with some steak, some flames and a grill just to make sure everyone gets the message. Everywhere a steak house and everywhere a picture of some flaming grill. Flaming on fire and not flaming as a euphemism for "damn". The flames of the damned though, as the great steak war hots up.
Steak houses have taken over. They are the new, well, tex-mex, except they're not new, just that everyone seems to want to be a steak house and everyone is promoting steak credentials. It had never really occurred to me that S'Albufera was a real steak house, as it's always been plain S'Albufera. But when the war is joined, so some realism is chalked onto a blackboard. And when it comes to the Dakotas, the longevity is, how can one put it, rather open to interpretation. Unlike S'Albufera which had also not previously boasted about its generation-plus existence. Or maybe it had; just that no one had noticed.
Do people really want all this steak? Real or not. Maybe they do. There are steak houses, kids newly on blocks, that are doing a roaring and flaming steak trade, albeit mingled in with kebabs and whatever else fills out the menu. Steak house, like pizzeria, has become something of a catch-all. Restaurant We Do Everything. And it's real.
We should really have a competition. Where is the most real steak? Which is the most real steak house? I can't honestly help as I rarely eat steak - rare or well done. A friend once said that Los Tamarindos in Puerto Alcúdia did the best steak he had ever eaten. I confess it wasn't bad. The solomillo at Satyricon in Alcúdia was magnificent, but that's hardly somewhere you might classify as a steak house. Boy in Playa de Muro's steak and meat come in the size of a cow, deliciously marinaded, but it calls itself a grill, as does Los Tamarindos. No steak house for either of these places, but they are, just as much as those which say they are real steak houses or steak houses with no statement as to being real or otherwise.
You cannot avoid steak. Whole herds of beef cow cut, sliced, flavoured, spitting, roasting, grilling. And all of it real. Unless it happens not to be.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Index for June 2010
Alcúdia, friendly - 16 June 2010
All-inclusive in Puerto Pollensa - 27 June 2010
All-inclusives and tour operators - 28 June 2010
Anxiety in Alcúdia - 19 June 2010
Balearic Government adjustment measures - 2 June 2010, 4 June 2010
Bellevue closure rumour - 9 June 2010, 10 June 2010
Cala San Vicente - 26 June 2010
Can Picafort: ducks and night party - 11 June 2010
Car rental - 23 June 2010
Council of Mallorca - 12 June 2010
Discounts - 18 June 2010
General public-sector strike - 6 June 2010
Grupo Marsans sold - 10 June 2010
Hotel occupancy - 8 June 2010, 10 June 2010
Miss Drag Mallorca - 13 June 2010
Noise, music and bars - 1 June 2010, 7 June 2010
Police, local government financing & - 15 June 2010
Prices in Mallorca - 6 June 2010
Puerto Pollensa protest - 2 June 2010, 3 June 2010
Russian tourism - 9 June 2010
Sant Pere fiesta Puerto Alcúdia 2010 brochure - 22 June 2010
Sis Pins ownership - 3 June 2010
Smoking ban law - 22 June 2010
Steak houses - 30 June 2010
Tourism Agency for the Balearic Islands - 8 June 2010
Tourist information offices: too helpful? - 25 June 2010
Tourist satisfaction - 21 June 2010
Towers of Alcúdia Bay - 5 June 2010
Well-being promotion, active - 20 June 2010
World Cup - 17 June 2010, 24 June 2010, 28 June 2010, 29 June 2010
Youth drinking - 14 June 2010
There is a real steak war emerging. A real steak war as in both the steak being real and there really being a steak war as opposed to a pretend one; well, sort of. The real steak war is also being fought out over real historical claims. Since 19--, apply your own numbers. The steak war is in Las Gaviotas, the area of Playa de Muro that no one really calls Las Gaviotas, if they happen to be a tourist, as equally no tourist really calls it Playa de Muro because they think, or are told, that it is Alcúdia, which it isn't.
The restaurant S'Albufera has a chalkboard sign outside, declaring the reality of its steak and the years of really having been a steak house. 30 years, it would seem. Why has the restaurant made this move? It is, it would appear, an escalation of the war against a newcomer to the steak battlefield. Where would we be without them? The Dakota restaurants.
Almost next door to S'Albufera and its thirty years of steaking claims is a new Dakota, but not only a tex-mex Dakota. This is a steak house Dakota. A large sign says so. Steak House in big letters with some steak, some flames and a grill just to make sure everyone gets the message. Everywhere a steak house and everywhere a picture of some flaming grill. Flaming on fire and not flaming as a euphemism for "damn". The flames of the damned though, as the great steak war hots up.
Steak houses have taken over. They are the new, well, tex-mex, except they're not new, just that everyone seems to want to be a steak house and everyone is promoting steak credentials. It had never really occurred to me that S'Albufera was a real steak house, as it's always been plain S'Albufera. But when the war is joined, so some realism is chalked onto a blackboard. And when it comes to the Dakotas, the longevity is, how can one put it, rather open to interpretation. Unlike S'Albufera which had also not previously boasted about its generation-plus existence. Or maybe it had; just that no one had noticed.
Do people really want all this steak? Real or not. Maybe they do. There are steak houses, kids newly on blocks, that are doing a roaring and flaming steak trade, albeit mingled in with kebabs and whatever else fills out the menu. Steak house, like pizzeria, has become something of a catch-all. Restaurant We Do Everything. And it's real.
We should really have a competition. Where is the most real steak? Which is the most real steak house? I can't honestly help as I rarely eat steak - rare or well done. A friend once said that Los Tamarindos in Puerto Alcúdia did the best steak he had ever eaten. I confess it wasn't bad. The solomillo at Satyricon in Alcúdia was magnificent, but that's hardly somewhere you might classify as a steak house. Boy in Playa de Muro's steak and meat come in the size of a cow, deliciously marinaded, but it calls itself a grill, as does Los Tamarindos. No steak house for either of these places, but they are, just as much as those which say they are real steak houses or steak houses with no statement as to being real or otherwise.
You cannot avoid steak. Whole herds of beef cow cut, sliced, flavoured, spitting, roasting, grilling. And all of it real. Unless it happens not to be.
Any comments to andrew@thealcudiaguide.com please.
Index for June 2010
Alcúdia, friendly - 16 June 2010
All-inclusive in Puerto Pollensa - 27 June 2010
All-inclusives and tour operators - 28 June 2010
Anxiety in Alcúdia - 19 June 2010
Balearic Government adjustment measures - 2 June 2010, 4 June 2010
Bellevue closure rumour - 9 June 2010, 10 June 2010
Cala San Vicente - 26 June 2010
Can Picafort: ducks and night party - 11 June 2010
Car rental - 23 June 2010
Council of Mallorca - 12 June 2010
Discounts - 18 June 2010
General public-sector strike - 6 June 2010
Grupo Marsans sold - 10 June 2010
Hotel occupancy - 8 June 2010, 10 June 2010
Miss Drag Mallorca - 13 June 2010
Noise, music and bars - 1 June 2010, 7 June 2010
Police, local government financing & - 15 June 2010
Prices in Mallorca - 6 June 2010
Puerto Pollensa protest - 2 June 2010, 3 June 2010
Russian tourism - 9 June 2010
Sant Pere fiesta Puerto Alcúdia 2010 brochure - 22 June 2010
Sis Pins ownership - 3 June 2010
Smoking ban law - 22 June 2010
Steak houses - 30 June 2010
Tourism Agency for the Balearic Islands - 8 June 2010
Tourist information offices: too helpful? - 25 June 2010
Tourist satisfaction - 21 June 2010
Towers of Alcúdia Bay - 5 June 2010
Well-being promotion, active - 20 June 2010
World Cup - 17 June 2010, 24 June 2010, 28 June 2010, 29 June 2010
Youth drinking - 14 June 2010
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Joy To The World
The tourism dignitaries have gathered in London for the World Travel Market. Today, Balearics Day at the trade fair, will see the premiere of the new Rafael Nadal advert for the Balearics. Let joy be unconfined.
What does any of this achieve? The World Travel Market is, in no small part, a set of shop windows for the industry, one that already knows about Mallorca and the Balearics. The same applies to corporate advertising, of the Nadal style. Not everyone may know about the Balearics, which does of course beg a significant question, but they (the consuming tourist public) know about Mallorca. Both the trade fair and the advertising act, at best, as a means of putting Mallorca in the "front of mind" of the industry and the consumer. But so does that of every other destination.
In "The Sunday Times" at the weekend there was a double-page colour advert for Andalucia. Some of the advertising for this region of Spain has been sensational. Its TV advert, luscious colours, dramatic scenery and vibrant flamenco chill music, was outstanding. But it was still an advert for a region. Just as advertising, of the Nadal variety, is for a region. It may all create attention and therefore, possibly, some action, but that is all it does.
In the case of the Andalucia advert, there is a scrawled blurb across the two pages: "I want you to share my energy, my happiness, my strength, my warmth ... A thousand monuments beyond compare. And just one question: When are you coming?" This last bit, the question, is the only good part of this. The rest is utterly ridiculous and pretentious. An attempt to make personal the impersonal, supported by a photo of a beach at sunset and a church in daytime. Whatever good it may achieve is undone by a small logo at the bottom which refers to "Junta de Andalucia". Someone might have pointed out that the word "junta" has negative connotations where the British are concerned.
Be this as it may. Advertising for Andalucia, for Turkey, for Egypt, for wherever you may care to mention, it all follows the same pattern. Mediterranean destinations tout the same things, the same sorts of images; they display warmth, sun, sea, culture, people, scenery. There is no differentiation. It is why much of the advertising is questionable. Its main purpose is to be there. In other words, it would be conspicuous by its absence.
This advertising is part aspirational and part image-making, but it fits a particular aspirational class and one attracted by a specific image. For all that it is intended to promote the whole gamut of a destination's offer, it does nothing of the sort. Holidaymakers are not a homogeneous group. They differ in all manner of respects. For this reason and for all the attention that gets paid to the Nadal-style corporate advertising (by the media and letter writers), it can only ever act as a starting-point (if that) or as a reinforcement to those already familiar with the island.
How do those who sanction this promotion believe that the process then works? Do they assume that there exists a hierarchical decision-making system? At the top comes Nadal, then there is a series of moves before the holidaymaker chooses a specific resort or hotel. Is this how it is meant to work? If it doesn't, and I don't believe it does, then what's the point of the thing at the top? This is how it used to work, back in the days when the family would be assaulted by Boxing Day adverts, opt for Mallorca and then head off to the nearest travel agency and pretty much have the choice of resort and hotel made for them.
Consumers take more or less as read the elements of a Mediterranean destination, be it Mallorca, Andalucia or wherever. They do so because the advertising and the images are essentially the same. As much as some consumers may work down from image advertising, they also work upwards, if not more so, in making their choices, without necessarily specifying a destination. And they all have different priorities, the satisfying of which is made in no small part through the informal channels of the internet - the forums, the blogs, the this, the that. The choice of a Turkey over a Mallorca lies largely with word of mouth, with a critical mass of recommendation, with a curious incuriosity that is the consequence of somewhere having become the latest in-place, and with a sense of "oh, let's give that a try". And much of this is predicated on price, on hotel (often all-inclusive), on specific offers, on what there is for the kids and all the rest. It is with the very detail of the holiday that the decision lies, not with the broad sweep of a Nadal on a yacht.
The tourism chiefs have singularly failed to understand the new dynamic of holiday decision-making or to appreciate the subversive influence of the internet; subversive in that, though these chiefs see the immense value of internet promotion, the internet acts independently of the corporate advertising. The real challenge lies in attempting to formalise the informal, of working this subversive element so that it favours a particular destination, and not just an island or a region, but a resort or even a particular complex. These chiefs need to cotton on to the reality of how consumers function on the internet, through social networks and so on, and to exploit these subversive factions themselves. If they don't, all that lavish spending on corporate advertising is a waste.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - British Sea Power, "The Lonely", http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2yK9p-icr0w. Today's title - this one started "Jeremiah was a bullfrog".
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
What does any of this achieve? The World Travel Market is, in no small part, a set of shop windows for the industry, one that already knows about Mallorca and the Balearics. The same applies to corporate advertising, of the Nadal style. Not everyone may know about the Balearics, which does of course beg a significant question, but they (the consuming tourist public) know about Mallorca. Both the trade fair and the advertising act, at best, as a means of putting Mallorca in the "front of mind" of the industry and the consumer. But so does that of every other destination.
In "The Sunday Times" at the weekend there was a double-page colour advert for Andalucia. Some of the advertising for this region of Spain has been sensational. Its TV advert, luscious colours, dramatic scenery and vibrant flamenco chill music, was outstanding. But it was still an advert for a region. Just as advertising, of the Nadal variety, is for a region. It may all create attention and therefore, possibly, some action, but that is all it does.
In the case of the Andalucia advert, there is a scrawled blurb across the two pages: "I want you to share my energy, my happiness, my strength, my warmth ... A thousand monuments beyond compare. And just one question: When are you coming?" This last bit, the question, is the only good part of this. The rest is utterly ridiculous and pretentious. An attempt to make personal the impersonal, supported by a photo of a beach at sunset and a church in daytime. Whatever good it may achieve is undone by a small logo at the bottom which refers to "Junta de Andalucia". Someone might have pointed out that the word "junta" has negative connotations where the British are concerned.
Be this as it may. Advertising for Andalucia, for Turkey, for Egypt, for wherever you may care to mention, it all follows the same pattern. Mediterranean destinations tout the same things, the same sorts of images; they display warmth, sun, sea, culture, people, scenery. There is no differentiation. It is why much of the advertising is questionable. Its main purpose is to be there. In other words, it would be conspicuous by its absence.
This advertising is part aspirational and part image-making, but it fits a particular aspirational class and one attracted by a specific image. For all that it is intended to promote the whole gamut of a destination's offer, it does nothing of the sort. Holidaymakers are not a homogeneous group. They differ in all manner of respects. For this reason and for all the attention that gets paid to the Nadal-style corporate advertising (by the media and letter writers), it can only ever act as a starting-point (if that) or as a reinforcement to those already familiar with the island.
How do those who sanction this promotion believe that the process then works? Do they assume that there exists a hierarchical decision-making system? At the top comes Nadal, then there is a series of moves before the holidaymaker chooses a specific resort or hotel. Is this how it is meant to work? If it doesn't, and I don't believe it does, then what's the point of the thing at the top? This is how it used to work, back in the days when the family would be assaulted by Boxing Day adverts, opt for Mallorca and then head off to the nearest travel agency and pretty much have the choice of resort and hotel made for them.
Consumers take more or less as read the elements of a Mediterranean destination, be it Mallorca, Andalucia or wherever. They do so because the advertising and the images are essentially the same. As much as some consumers may work down from image advertising, they also work upwards, if not more so, in making their choices, without necessarily specifying a destination. And they all have different priorities, the satisfying of which is made in no small part through the informal channels of the internet - the forums, the blogs, the this, the that. The choice of a Turkey over a Mallorca lies largely with word of mouth, with a critical mass of recommendation, with a curious incuriosity that is the consequence of somewhere having become the latest in-place, and with a sense of "oh, let's give that a try". And much of this is predicated on price, on hotel (often all-inclusive), on specific offers, on what there is for the kids and all the rest. It is with the very detail of the holiday that the decision lies, not with the broad sweep of a Nadal on a yacht.
The tourism chiefs have singularly failed to understand the new dynamic of holiday decision-making or to appreciate the subversive influence of the internet; subversive in that, though these chiefs see the immense value of internet promotion, the internet acts independently of the corporate advertising. The real challenge lies in attempting to formalise the informal, of working this subversive element so that it favours a particular destination, and not just an island or a region, but a resort or even a particular complex. These chiefs need to cotton on to the reality of how consumers function on the internet, through social networks and so on, and to exploit these subversive factions themselves. If they don't, all that lavish spending on corporate advertising is a waste.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - British Sea Power, "The Lonely", http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2yK9p-icr0w. Today's title - this one started "Jeremiah was a bullfrog".
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Fools Gold
Where is the "cr-eee-sis" greater or greatest, or at its most cr-eee-sis-itic? I'm thinking of starting a local league table, though the higher the score, the greater the cr-eee-sis and likewise the number of points: The Mile 4 Can Picafort 4, as opposed to Pollensa Old Town 1 Cala San Vicente 6. Or something like that. But maybe I've got it all wrong. The Chinese in the old town of Pollensa was full of talk of cr-eee-sis. "Mucha cr-eee-sis, mucha cr-eee-sis." A sort of China cr-eee-sis, ho ho. And whatever happened to them?
In these days of shortage, the cr-eee-sis takes different forms, one of them being that businesses look to cut back, and we all know those areas that they cut - training, advertising, research. The counter argument is that in bad times you do the opposite. There is a free newspaper here, some of you will know it. This week's issue features a piece, an "advertising feature" (advertorial, as it is sometimes known) which stresses the fact that the advertiser - writing the piece - is spending a bundle even in these difficult days. It goes on to say that reducing advertising spend in the circumstances in which many of us find ourselves today is a "fool's economy". In which case, there are a lot of fools around, I suspect. But fool would not be a word I would use.
This is unfair; this article in this paper. The advertiser has indeed taken a lot of space. Good for him, or them. It will probably be very successful. Indeed it should be. A flood of advertising is basically how you do it. You may as well not bother advertising, as just do it once. It doesn't really get you anywhere. Splash it around, do it as much as possible. There are businesses that have become successful solely on the basis of advertising. I can tell you about an estate agency that did just that. From nothing to market leader, thanks to advertising; well, in the good times anyway. Look, it works. The guy who has written this article is right, but to imply that people who don't are fools? I don't think so. People aren't fools. They know that they have to promote: it is a basic of any business. The issue is not that they don't know; it's whether they can.
This is why it's unfair. Here is a free newspaper, which of course relies on advertising, using a major advertiser to hector other potential, existing or lapsed advertisers. It's kind of hard sell via editorial.
I know a number of the businesses that act as distribution points for this paper. I'll tell you about one. Or I could tell you, but I won't, because I resolved that I wasn't going to do the economy-misery stuff here, and because I don't want to talk about the cost of the rent of the house, the cost of the rent of the bar, the cost of the staff (now let go because of the cost), the cost of the child, the cost of the electricity ... . I agree with the author in the free newspaper. He is right. But fools? No, my friend, not fools. Never, ever, fools. And please don't insult them as such.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Perry Como (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q5zarGeHKNU). Today's title - how come is it that this is the first time they have been mentioned here - Manchester-ists.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
In these days of shortage, the cr-eee-sis takes different forms, one of them being that businesses look to cut back, and we all know those areas that they cut - training, advertising, research. The counter argument is that in bad times you do the opposite. There is a free newspaper here, some of you will know it. This week's issue features a piece, an "advertising feature" (advertorial, as it is sometimes known) which stresses the fact that the advertiser - writing the piece - is spending a bundle even in these difficult days. It goes on to say that reducing advertising spend in the circumstances in which many of us find ourselves today is a "fool's economy". In which case, there are a lot of fools around, I suspect. But fool would not be a word I would use.
This is unfair; this article in this paper. The advertiser has indeed taken a lot of space. Good for him, or them. It will probably be very successful. Indeed it should be. A flood of advertising is basically how you do it. You may as well not bother advertising, as just do it once. It doesn't really get you anywhere. Splash it around, do it as much as possible. There are businesses that have become successful solely on the basis of advertising. I can tell you about an estate agency that did just that. From nothing to market leader, thanks to advertising; well, in the good times anyway. Look, it works. The guy who has written this article is right, but to imply that people who don't are fools? I don't think so. People aren't fools. They know that they have to promote: it is a basic of any business. The issue is not that they don't know; it's whether they can.
This is why it's unfair. Here is a free newspaper, which of course relies on advertising, using a major advertiser to hector other potential, existing or lapsed advertisers. It's kind of hard sell via editorial.
I know a number of the businesses that act as distribution points for this paper. I'll tell you about one. Or I could tell you, but I won't, because I resolved that I wasn't going to do the economy-misery stuff here, and because I don't want to talk about the cost of the rent of the house, the cost of the rent of the bar, the cost of the staff (now let go because of the cost), the cost of the child, the cost of the electricity ... . I agree with the author in the free newspaper. He is right. But fools? No, my friend, not fools. Never, ever, fools. And please don't insult them as such.
QUIZ
Yesterday's title - Perry Como (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q5zarGeHKNU). Today's title - how come is it that this is the first time they have been mentioned here - Manchester-ists.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
More Than Words
The advertising slogan. The main purpose of the slogan is, or should be, to create recognition and recall and therefore to project the product or service firmly to the front of mind of the consumer. "Buy one, get one free!" is not a slogan, it is a sales pitch. "Naughty but nice" is a slogan (and extra points today if anyone knows who coined the slogan). The slogan, be it enigmatic or blatant, has to have the force of the advertising and marketing that supports it; it also has to be strong enough to command that recall and to reinforce the branding of which the slogan is one aspect and sometimes the defining aspect. Some slogans work on the basis of a form of reverse psychology. This blog has one - "don't tell anyone about it!" The thinking is that it both strengthens a degree of personal ownership within a kind of abstract exclusive club of "blogotees" and also makes the reader do precisely the opposite. At least that's the theory and, take my word for it, I can theorise about marketing till Hell freezes over. But, you'll be pleased to know, I won't; well not much.
The reverse psychology, because it causes the reader to pause and think, is, in many ways, a more powerful prompt than the less demanding of slogan, always assuming that the consumer "gets it". The reverse hypothesis operates on the principle that the consumer does not interpret the message at face value.
One of the most famous advertising disasters was the "you're never alone with a Strand" cigarette slogan captured in an advert with a man alone on a street. What it hoped to say was either that by puffing away on this particular fag you would be everyone's mate (this was in the days when smoking was a more or less de rigueur social habit) or that you could indeed be alone but the Strand would keep you company. Either way, it was not taken as the advertisers (Wills in this case) would have hoped, as the consumer perceived it to mean simply that the smoker in the ad was a lonely git. Despite its popularity as a piece of advertising cinema, the ad was swiftly axed. No reverse occurred; it was taken as was - for Strand read loneliness, which was a negative and therefore incompatible with creating a positive brand image. The theory of the slogan and the advertising that accompanies it are nought without the knowledge of the practice of the consumer's thought process.
This is all by way of introduction to the fact that the keepers of the marketing of Mallorca at the tourism council have come up with a dynamic new slogan of their own - indeed one main slogan with three variants. This is: "much more than ...". The blankety-blank cheque book and pen goes to those who can append the words - "golf", "meetings" and "good food", for these make up the three differing sloganettes. The "more than" tag is hardly original, while the addition of "much" hints at a certain desperation. But the slogan, any of the three, has a certain reverse psychology appeal in a sense, in that - at least I guess this is the thinking - it makes the consumer say to him or herself, oh I didn't know there was golf/meetings/good food in Mallorca (delete as applicable). The problem is that the same consumer may just take the slogan at face value and ask: "what much more?" And herein does indeed lie a problem as there isn't much more if indeed any more. Alternatively, the consumer may ask: "Why are they saying 'more than golf'? Don't they mean that golf is more than just the beach?"
What they want to get across is that Mallorca has much more than just sun and beach to offer. Hard though I am trying to accept the logic of a slogan that is essentially illogical, I'm afraid I cannot; in short, it's not very good. Moreover, the slogan comes back to the basic misapprehension that seems to exist in the Mallorcan marketing mindset, i.e. that there is a lot of mileage in tourism diversification as typified by golf, meetings (and conferences) and gastronomy. It also comes back to another misapprehension that by failing to play on Mallorca's greatest assets - the sun and the beach - it fails to build on that very core image. A slogan that went "much more than sun and beach" might well be crap but it would both acknowledge the central brand image of Mallorca while, at the same time, seeking to establish that tourism diversification with which they feel they can attract great hordes of new-style tourists. But the chosen slogan attempts cutesy cleverness and could be said to be confusing. It seeks to jolt with a type of stylistic joke. However, as my hypothetical consumer might ask: "Have they got this right? Shouldn't it be more than sun?" Indeed when I first read about this slogan (in "The Bulletin") I did myself wonder if there was a mistake, so I looked it up on the Internet and discovered that it was correct.
There is, however, another potential angle to this slogan, one that is largely irrelevant to an overseas audience but may well be resonant with a Spanish one, and a Catalan one in particular. This is that Barcelona Football Club has long had the Catalan slogan "més que un club" (more than a club). As I alluded to yesterday, Barca and the team's following go well beyond that part of Catalonia. The slogan will be known to many; it was adopted in the latter years of Franco to emphasise the club's centrality to Catalonian autonomy (as it still does). The Mallorcan slogan may well be purely coincidental; as I say, the words "more than" are common enough in advertising (and, I daresay, so are their equivalents in Spanish or Catalan advertising). But the Barca slogan has a power and a directness; the Mallorca one has neither.
QUIZ
Yesterday's chain - the connection was Rat Scabies, the drummer. Among The Damned's numbers was Captain Sensible. So what's his connection with Rodgers and Hammerstein? Yesterday's title - Robin Hall and Jimmy McGregor. Today's title? American. Lots of hair.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
The reverse psychology, because it causes the reader to pause and think, is, in many ways, a more powerful prompt than the less demanding of slogan, always assuming that the consumer "gets it". The reverse hypothesis operates on the principle that the consumer does not interpret the message at face value.
One of the most famous advertising disasters was the "you're never alone with a Strand" cigarette slogan captured in an advert with a man alone on a street. What it hoped to say was either that by puffing away on this particular fag you would be everyone's mate (this was in the days when smoking was a more or less de rigueur social habit) or that you could indeed be alone but the Strand would keep you company. Either way, it was not taken as the advertisers (Wills in this case) would have hoped, as the consumer perceived it to mean simply that the smoker in the ad was a lonely git. Despite its popularity as a piece of advertising cinema, the ad was swiftly axed. No reverse occurred; it was taken as was - for Strand read loneliness, which was a negative and therefore incompatible with creating a positive brand image. The theory of the slogan and the advertising that accompanies it are nought without the knowledge of the practice of the consumer's thought process.
This is all by way of introduction to the fact that the keepers of the marketing of Mallorca at the tourism council have come up with a dynamic new slogan of their own - indeed one main slogan with three variants. This is: "much more than ...". The blankety-blank cheque book and pen goes to those who can append the words - "golf", "meetings" and "good food", for these make up the three differing sloganettes. The "more than" tag is hardly original, while the addition of "much" hints at a certain desperation. But the slogan, any of the three, has a certain reverse psychology appeal in a sense, in that - at least I guess this is the thinking - it makes the consumer say to him or herself, oh I didn't know there was golf/meetings/good food in Mallorca (delete as applicable). The problem is that the same consumer may just take the slogan at face value and ask: "what much more?" And herein does indeed lie a problem as there isn't much more if indeed any more. Alternatively, the consumer may ask: "Why are they saying 'more than golf'? Don't they mean that golf is more than just the beach?"
What they want to get across is that Mallorca has much more than just sun and beach to offer. Hard though I am trying to accept the logic of a slogan that is essentially illogical, I'm afraid I cannot; in short, it's not very good. Moreover, the slogan comes back to the basic misapprehension that seems to exist in the Mallorcan marketing mindset, i.e. that there is a lot of mileage in tourism diversification as typified by golf, meetings (and conferences) and gastronomy. It also comes back to another misapprehension that by failing to play on Mallorca's greatest assets - the sun and the beach - it fails to build on that very core image. A slogan that went "much more than sun and beach" might well be crap but it would both acknowledge the central brand image of Mallorca while, at the same time, seeking to establish that tourism diversification with which they feel they can attract great hordes of new-style tourists. But the chosen slogan attempts cutesy cleverness and could be said to be confusing. It seeks to jolt with a type of stylistic joke. However, as my hypothetical consumer might ask: "Have they got this right? Shouldn't it be more than sun?" Indeed when I first read about this slogan (in "The Bulletin") I did myself wonder if there was a mistake, so I looked it up on the Internet and discovered that it was correct.
There is, however, another potential angle to this slogan, one that is largely irrelevant to an overseas audience but may well be resonant with a Spanish one, and a Catalan one in particular. This is that Barcelona Football Club has long had the Catalan slogan "més que un club" (more than a club). As I alluded to yesterday, Barca and the team's following go well beyond that part of Catalonia. The slogan will be known to many; it was adopted in the latter years of Franco to emphasise the club's centrality to Catalonian autonomy (as it still does). The Mallorcan slogan may well be purely coincidental; as I say, the words "more than" are common enough in advertising (and, I daresay, so are their equivalents in Spanish or Catalan advertising). But the Barca slogan has a power and a directness; the Mallorca one has neither.
QUIZ
Yesterday's chain - the connection was Rat Scabies, the drummer. Among The Damned's numbers was Captain Sensible. So what's his connection with Rodgers and Hammerstein? Yesterday's title - Robin Hall and Jimmy McGregor. Today's title? American. Lots of hair.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Sunday, March 02, 2008
Meat Is Murder
One of the things I really must do some time is to create a proper database of all the blog entries. The problem is, you see, that I think about something with which to entertain you and it then occurs to me - haven't I done this? So it is today. The other problem is that occasionally I do compile a piece and then decide not to use it. And I suspect this is the case, because can I find it? Anyway, so much for my organisation, or lack thereof.
Some of you may know that I pass my time creating small works of art in the form of adverts for the likes of restaurants and bars. When you go and see a restaurant for the first time, there is a process of information gathering. What is it about your restaurant etc, etc.? If it's Spanish-run, I normally know the answer before it comes, or at least one of the answers. "Specialists in meat." That's the English translation. The restaurant sells itself on the basis of being - a specialist in meat. Now, call me old-fashioned, but, unless a restaurant states specfically that it cooks only fish or vegetarian dishes, I sort of expect that maybe they do meat. It doesn't occur to me that they might specialise in meat as meat is, in my experience, fairly common in restaurants. But no, many a restaurant will announce, quite clearly, it is a meat specialist. Listen to local radio and there will be any number of jibbering formulaic ads for restaurants, some voiceover Charlie or Carlos, excitedly extolling the virtues of Restaurant X, a specialist in meat. The following ad will have more subdued, chilled muzak to create, one presumes, a more serious and intimate image, but there will be the same Carlos now doing a husky voice turn but still specialising in meat.
It makes me wonder if there is some historical reason for this. Perhaps it was once the case that, with the exception of the village goat being served up once in a while, restaurants were specialists merely in sacks of potatoes and a cabbage. I can't think of any other good reason why there is this contemporary insistence, except for a me-too thought process. Once upon a time, a restaurant advertised itself as a specialist in meat, and the rest thought - oh, that's a good idea.
When the Ford Motor Company "invented" quality in whenever it was - the late '70s I think - as a means of promoting Granadas, Sierras and the like, the rest of the marketing world realised that they too would have to boast about their quality. Now everyone does it, and it means absolutely nothing.
I do sort of try to suggest that maybe there is something a bit more to say than the meat specialism deal. But then one runs into the "home-made" or even "hand-made" line: try this cow, and here's one I made earlier. Whatever. They're happy enough, and what the client wants, the client gets.
One other thing you do also tend to encounter is the dodgy translation. The restaurant owner proudly shows you a card or menu or some promotional thing and there it is - rotten English assaulting the eyes. Priceless some of it. "Flesh on the tenterhooks." Some of you might recognise which restaurant this is from. It's one I know very well. Their cards had this tenterhooks faux-pas as a translation (if one can call it that) for tender meat. Lord alone knows how the sap of a printer who boldly said they did English got to this. Well, yes, they did do English. They slaughtered it, hung it and then cooked it to a crisp. At least this particular restaurant didn't claim to be a specialist in meat, though the meat is very good and tender, but not on tenterhooks.
Anyway, if you're off to a restaurant this evening, you can be sure of one thing. Wherever you go, to pretty much whichever restaurant, you will get meat, and meat, moreover, from a specialist. Enjoy your meal.
QUIZ
Yesterday - R. Kelly. Today's title - album by? Easy stuff.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Some of you may know that I pass my time creating small works of art in the form of adverts for the likes of restaurants and bars. When you go and see a restaurant for the first time, there is a process of information gathering. What is it about your restaurant etc, etc.? If it's Spanish-run, I normally know the answer before it comes, or at least one of the answers. "Specialists in meat." That's the English translation. The restaurant sells itself on the basis of being - a specialist in meat. Now, call me old-fashioned, but, unless a restaurant states specfically that it cooks only fish or vegetarian dishes, I sort of expect that maybe they do meat. It doesn't occur to me that they might specialise in meat as meat is, in my experience, fairly common in restaurants. But no, many a restaurant will announce, quite clearly, it is a meat specialist. Listen to local radio and there will be any number of jibbering formulaic ads for restaurants, some voiceover Charlie or Carlos, excitedly extolling the virtues of Restaurant X, a specialist in meat. The following ad will have more subdued, chilled muzak to create, one presumes, a more serious and intimate image, but there will be the same Carlos now doing a husky voice turn but still specialising in meat.
It makes me wonder if there is some historical reason for this. Perhaps it was once the case that, with the exception of the village goat being served up once in a while, restaurants were specialists merely in sacks of potatoes and a cabbage. I can't think of any other good reason why there is this contemporary insistence, except for a me-too thought process. Once upon a time, a restaurant advertised itself as a specialist in meat, and the rest thought - oh, that's a good idea.
When the Ford Motor Company "invented" quality in whenever it was - the late '70s I think - as a means of promoting Granadas, Sierras and the like, the rest of the marketing world realised that they too would have to boast about their quality. Now everyone does it, and it means absolutely nothing.
I do sort of try to suggest that maybe there is something a bit more to say than the meat specialism deal. But then one runs into the "home-made" or even "hand-made" line: try this cow, and here's one I made earlier. Whatever. They're happy enough, and what the client wants, the client gets.
One other thing you do also tend to encounter is the dodgy translation. The restaurant owner proudly shows you a card or menu or some promotional thing and there it is - rotten English assaulting the eyes. Priceless some of it. "Flesh on the tenterhooks." Some of you might recognise which restaurant this is from. It's one I know very well. Their cards had this tenterhooks faux-pas as a translation (if one can call it that) for tender meat. Lord alone knows how the sap of a printer who boldly said they did English got to this. Well, yes, they did do English. They slaughtered it, hung it and then cooked it to a crisp. At least this particular restaurant didn't claim to be a specialist in meat, though the meat is very good and tender, but not on tenterhooks.
Anyway, if you're off to a restaurant this evening, you can be sure of one thing. Wherever you go, to pretty much whichever restaurant, you will get meat, and meat, moreover, from a specialist. Enjoy your meal.
QUIZ
Yesterday - R. Kelly. Today's title - album by? Easy stuff.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Girls On Film
I watched a film the other evening, a good film – by all accounts. I was about to say a good film in any language, but that’s the problem; it is no longer a good film because it is no longer THE film. Give it another language and a drama becomes a comedy of dodgy lip-sync and ill-cast linguistic impersonation. Dubbing. Mostly all international films and TV shows are dubbed here. In the case of “The Queen” – or “La Reina” to give it its Spanish title – the only subtitling was for documentary footage such as Earl Spencer’s oration. Otherwise, Helen Mirren, Michael Sheen and the rest became people other than themselves not just because they were acting but because someone else was acting them – after a fashion.
While I quite understand the desire to dub, it is utterly absurd. When I was in Germany, I was once listening to a radio show that previewed forthcoming films. Showcased was a film with Meryl Streep and Danny de Vito. What was truly surreal was to listen to two German “actors” and to then be told by the presenter that I had been listening to Streep and de Vito. I had not had been. I had in fact been listening to Waltraud and Kurt from Bielefeld and Chemnitz, one of them, for all I could have known, with a wooden leg. In Germany, there used to be a kid who was the German Daniel Radcliffe; probably still is. In all seriousness, this adolescent, the German voice of Harry Potter, used to get wheeled out on TV shows, masquerading as the boy wizard – Heinzi from Hogvorts. I know someone who couldn’t believe Eddie Murphy was Eddie Murphy when he finally heard him speaking without a Germano-Black American voiceover. God alone knows what they do with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
But just think about it. What do these “actors” do? Are they living the roles? Are they using their facial expressions, their body actions? Are they on a set in front of a camera? Can Helen Mirren’s Spanish voice really appreciate the interpretation that Mirren brought to the role? Of course she can’t. Basically, a good piece of art is taken and thoroughly mangled by the dubbing.
This is not a plea for using subtitles simply because I can then hear a film in English. I no more want, say, the French families of François Truffaut’s charming “L’Argent de Poche” to be talking with home-counties accents than I want Helen Mirren to be inhabited by a Spanish bint who keeps on referring to some chaps called Felipe and Carlos.
And then there is advertising. “The Queen” appeared on one of the main national channels. Both take advertising. Fifteen minutes into the film there was an interlude that lasted … fifteen minutes. Adverts. They then have the gall to announce “estamos viendo” (we are watching) La Reina. No, we are not watching; we had been until a completely different programme comprising sketches for perfumes and kitchen units had been inserted. All was then fine until the end of the scene with Earl Spencer. Now, I had not seen the film. Had I, I would have switched off at that point. Some fifteen or twenty minutes more of advertising, and then – what – five minutes remaining with Mirren and Sheen walking in the gardens at Buck House. I only took note of the adverts so that I could remind myself never to buy a Volkswagen, to change my mobile account from Vodafone and to give Jane Fonda, and her Spanish voiceover, a good slap when I next see them with a L’Oreal cream.
QUIZ
Yesterday – “My Old Man Said Follow The Van”. Today’s title – which group? Easy.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
While I quite understand the desire to dub, it is utterly absurd. When I was in Germany, I was once listening to a radio show that previewed forthcoming films. Showcased was a film with Meryl Streep and Danny de Vito. What was truly surreal was to listen to two German “actors” and to then be told by the presenter that I had been listening to Streep and de Vito. I had not had been. I had in fact been listening to Waltraud and Kurt from Bielefeld and Chemnitz, one of them, for all I could have known, with a wooden leg. In Germany, there used to be a kid who was the German Daniel Radcliffe; probably still is. In all seriousness, this adolescent, the German voice of Harry Potter, used to get wheeled out on TV shows, masquerading as the boy wizard – Heinzi from Hogvorts. I know someone who couldn’t believe Eddie Murphy was Eddie Murphy when he finally heard him speaking without a Germano-Black American voiceover. God alone knows what they do with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
But just think about it. What do these “actors” do? Are they living the roles? Are they using their facial expressions, their body actions? Are they on a set in front of a camera? Can Helen Mirren’s Spanish voice really appreciate the interpretation that Mirren brought to the role? Of course she can’t. Basically, a good piece of art is taken and thoroughly mangled by the dubbing.
This is not a plea for using subtitles simply because I can then hear a film in English. I no more want, say, the French families of François Truffaut’s charming “L’Argent de Poche” to be talking with home-counties accents than I want Helen Mirren to be inhabited by a Spanish bint who keeps on referring to some chaps called Felipe and Carlos.
And then there is advertising. “The Queen” appeared on one of the main national channels. Both take advertising. Fifteen minutes into the film there was an interlude that lasted … fifteen minutes. Adverts. They then have the gall to announce “estamos viendo” (we are watching) La Reina. No, we are not watching; we had been until a completely different programme comprising sketches for perfumes and kitchen units had been inserted. All was then fine until the end of the scene with Earl Spencer. Now, I had not seen the film. Had I, I would have switched off at that point. Some fifteen or twenty minutes more of advertising, and then – what – five minutes remaining with Mirren and Sheen walking in the gardens at Buck House. I only took note of the adverts so that I could remind myself never to buy a Volkswagen, to change my mobile account from Vodafone and to give Jane Fonda, and her Spanish voiceover, a good slap when I next see them with a L’Oreal cream.
QUIZ
Yesterday – “My Old Man Said Follow The Van”. Today’s title – which group? Easy.
(PLEASE REPLY TO andrew@thealcudiaguide.com AND NOT VIA THE COMMENTS THINGY HERE.)
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